Scotland STAR WARS (in Glaswegian) line-by-line

Or "minker" if ye come fae Aeberdeen.

LOL


Doon here in enemy territory (England) they use the word "mingin" to mean drunk. I crack myself up when I hear people telling me they were mingin at the weekend.

 

Donner Kebab "Right A Chibs tae attack position and lets roar"

Tarquin "Whit are thae chubes daen noo - thaur attackin us wi flick-knives and machetes - yon McGlipshey must be a couple o weeds short o a good spliff."

Donner Kebab and the big bikes are thundering towards the Death-Baw when the first wave of rubber bullets and gas grenades miss by miles. "Feckin polis couldnae hit a barn door at 2 yards..another few metres lads and we're there."

Biker 2 "Here come pigs riding bikes big man"
Donner Kebab "***t, right you twa go and sort the polis while a finish this thing"

DCI Vader "I'll tak the chube in front, you sort these other twa plonkers oot"

Donner Kebab swerves to grab an abandoned bottle of bucky and heads towards the Death-Baw's huge wheels. "Feck, 1982 vintage, whaur huv you been a my life ya wee beautie"

He downs the Monk's finest and tosses the bottle over his head just missing Vader.

Vader "fecker, you'll pay....***t 1982 vintage, lucky bastard!"

Donner Kebab draws oot his machete and steams roars towards the huge wheel just as vader draws his shooter and takes pot shots at the biker.

With a final effort Donner Kebab raises his machete above his head and strikes at the Death-Baw tyre.

McGlimpshey "Ya feckin beautie, ye goat it"

Donner Kebab "Naw, naw...naw, I didn'y get it - my chib jist impacted oan the hubcap"

Sheepshagger "turn roon and come back and we cin huv another go"

Donner Kebab "listen sheepshagger, it's up tae you noo, take Pizza the Hutt's boys and set up a run o yer own"

Vader "tea time ya chube" He catches up wi Donner Kebab and shoots his tyres oot grinning and Donner Kebab and his bike are mangled by the Death-Baw wheels.

Tarquin "Feck sake - he nearly goat the wheel there, whit wis he dain that fur"

Aide "Well wee charlie forgoat tae change the tyres so they're as baldy as you ur without that syrrip oan - wan good hit and we're finished. Maybe we should leg-it"

Tarquin "Naw, just brink me some clean keks - Vader will sort them"

Sheepshagger and the Pizza the Hutt boys start to attack the Death-Baw as Vader spies them.

Vader "mair chubes tae sort"

 

LMAO

Excellent

 

back on target - well done my young padawan
I will give sheepshagger's climactic run my attention as soon as possible....
stay tuned folks

 

*squeals in delight!*
You are all crazy, are you not?

 

Um...aye, we ur.

All Scots ur mad.

 

especially the ones that move to England, Minx...........

 

Don't remind me.

 

Be very glad that u are not Swedish..
Our ancestors must have been up to a lot of inbreeding..

Seriously... I have not met one sane Swede ..
And I live there.

I want to live in Scotland!!!

 

Swedes have that problem with seasonal lack of sunlight, don't they?

Scots have similar problems with seasonal lack of hard drink, soap, drugs and sports wear......

I think that you are probably still better off in Sweden

Coolio TankGirl shot, btw.......

 

Em,.. yes we all walk around looking like living dead..

Im actually moving to London.. Sweden is sh***. *hehe*

"Coolio TankGirl shot, btw....... "
Well.. merci beaucoup.. But i look more like Booga...

 

Excellent work!
Excellent work!
Ouzo for everyone!

 

Mr DD - I am disappointed that this masterpiece has not been finished and worse, it seems to have become a haven for banal conversation

 

we'll have to do an definitive director's cut once we're done....
perhaps with extra scenes and stuff

end of banal conversation----------------------------------------let battle re-commence:

 

// pops head in, looks around, doesn't spot update, sighs and pops head out again//

 

[feet_shuffle]

 

[feet_shuffle] indeed [finger_type] would be better you know

 

:faintly, in the distance, an orchestra plays a familiar refrain ::

dum dum dum dum-de-dum dum-de-dum........

 

Oh the suspense is killing me

 

:faintly, in the distance, an orchestra plays a familiar refrain ::

dum dum dum dum-de-dum dum-de-dum........

Oh...thats my phone hang on...

LOL

 

So your phone plays the false alarm, tune also Cass?

 

LOL

It must do.

 

sssshh!
the movie is about to restart

 

[face-anxious]

I hope this is good - we've been waiting long enough

 

I hope the film is good as well SDM