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SW Dialogue: To maintain the traditional stilted hackneyism, or to impose an organic revision?

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction and Writing Resource' started by Mr_Black, Jun 6, 2004.

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  1. Mr_Black

    Mr_Black Jedi Master star 1

    Registered:
    May 31, 2004
    Maybe he wasn't yelling SJ. Consider this: at that very instant, his automated aural interface went on the fritz, and to compensate, his vocal amplifier ramped up. It was all a mechanized misunderstanding. [face_laugh]...a day in the life of a sinister tin man. You like how technical all of that sounded? I just sorta pulled the terminology out of thin air.

    Words are not a small part. There deserve as equal an emphasis as motive, action, reaction, and emotional consistency. The actual dialogue is the culmination of, the embodiment, of all the character elements.

    Dialogue is much more than a recording of a conversation between characters, it's a way to let the audience know how that character FEELS. This is especially true if the writing is in 1st person, as all the reader has to go by is the report of events given by a character. Physical dialogue, the words, are a vehicle for readers to gain a greater understanding of a character's background, personality, and to get a different perspective on the story apart from the voice of the author. In essence, character dialogue is a new lens for readers to view the goings on of that particular universe. In the SW pantheon, the best example I can think of is Yoda; if Yoda didn't talk like Yoda, he wouldn't be Yoda.

     
  2. Dantana Skywalker

    Dantana Skywalker Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Apr 7, 2002
    Words can be both imporant and unimportant. On the whole, there are a select number of words you can use to describe something, to express something. You're going to have to choose among those, so it isn't that imporant because, in effect, the selection is limited and sometimes already made for you ("May the Force be with you!" ;)).

    But the choice can still be important. Certain characters will use some words over others; it's called a personal vocabulary. There are some words that a character just wouldn't use.

    Hope that made sense, I'm running on half my cylinders today.


    Dana
     
  3. Mjsullivan

    Mjsullivan Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Dec 8, 2003
    Mr Black: Quite right you are, i concede. In my haste to get across the point about dialogue being more than words, i belittled the importance of words way too much. They are very important.

    to get a different perspective on the story apart from the voice of the author -- very true.

    However, I wanted to ask you about the 'Vader doesn't yell' thing... what about "Bring me the passengers, I want them ALIVE!" He doesn't yell often, but he defnitely does there

    SJ - haha, yes he does, it's true ;). And how can i forget classics like "WHAAT?" and "MMM-BAHHHH!" :D Yes, Vader does yell occasionally in unguarded moments. Probably not the best example i could have used, but it kind of works ;)

    Maybe he wasn't yelling SJ. Consider this: at that very instant, his automated aural interface went on the fritz, and to compensate, his vocal amplifier ramped up. It was all a mechanized misunderstanding

    I'm not willing to rule that out either, Mr Black! :D

    And DantanaSkywalker, you made perfect sense despite being on 50% cylinders :)
     
  4. Bobbacca

    Bobbacca Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Apr 25, 2003
    I just love what the actors think of GL's dialogue: "George, you can write this ****, but we can't say it."

    Whenever I hear or see people complain about the quality of the acting in the prequels not living up to the standards of the OT, I always respond by asking if they think they could deliver the lines in question any better. As an actor and a thespian I acknowledge the poor quality of the PT scripts because I would hate trying to read such aweful lines and then being criticized for not making them sound smooth and natural myself. I think it was a mistake for Lucas to write the prequel scripts himself. With the original trilogy, he hired writers, explained the story line to them and (in the case of ANH) gave them his draft of the script as a basis to work with. I haven't actually seen Lucas's draft of the ANH script, but I have read somewhere that the dialoge was hideous, so it comes as no surprise that the dialogue he wrote for the PT was hideous as well. GL is great at making movies and telling a story, but his writing abilities are poor.

    (I think I spelled "dialogue" differently everytime it appeared in this post :p )
     
  5. Mr_Black

    Mr_Black Jedi Master star 1

    Registered:
    May 31, 2004
    The guy who did Phantom edit should go in and re-do all of Vader's dialogue. In the new version, he's voiced by William Shatner, who is constantly using his enraged "Wrath of Kahn" voice [face_laugh]

    "MMM-BAHHHH!...KAAAHN!"

    "Pssst! Bill; wrong movie!"

    "WIPE...them out. ALL OF THEM!" (The "..." represent the classic Shatneristic dramatic pause.)

    Fear Darth Shatner, Dark Lord of the Melodrama.
     
  6. dianethx

    dianethx Jedi Master star 6

    Registered:
    Mar 1, 2002
    This may sound odd but I like the stilted dialogue. I think it gives the movies an old serials flavor (and those old serials were really horrible) that Lucas was trying to emulate. To change the dialogue to a more fluid, easy-to-read style really affects the whole perception of the fics and the characters. It becomes almost jarring to have the characters talk organically (if you will). My mind immediately says that the characterizations are wrong (even if they aren't per se).

    It would be like trying to put modern words into the mouths of Jane Austen heroines or dress Shakespearian heroes in suits and ties. Yes, I know it's been done but it just doesn't work for me....
     
  7. Mjsullivan

    Mjsullivan Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Dec 8, 2003
    Dianethx - i think youre right to a degree - canon characters need their dialogue to stay true to the films (Even if that dialogue completely sabotages any on-screen chemistry that anakin/padme might have had :rolleyes: ) except in the case of AU.

    OC's, however, have alot more scope for 'organic' dialogue. It's all down to personal preference, of course, but i prefer stories with OC's as the main characters. OC's have alot more freedom (in most respects) about them than cannon characters. They can say whatever they like in any way they like (generally).

    Bobacca - I agree. George, you come up with the basic stuff (and, of course, the money), let someone else write and direct. Ive never blamed Hayden Christiansen for not being able to make "You are in my very soul...TORmenting me" sound natural. Or, for that matter, Ewan McGregor for failing to salvage "BLAST, this why I HATE flying"

    Or "Thats.......why i'm here" *cue cheezy, sheepish grin and faux-casual shrug*. All that was missing from that scene was an obvious wink and a nudge, then the kaminoans would have been NONE the wiser.

    Mr Black - I worry that, if by some instance of horrible bad luck, william shatner reads your post, he will take it to heart and attempt revive his career that way.

    Alternatively, he could write a Star Wars one man show, starring himself as all the characters.

    BILL SHATNER: Did you...hear that?...they...shut...down the main...reactor. We'll...be destroyed for....sure.

    BILL SHATNER: Bleep....BLOOP bleep...bleep.
     
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