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Before - Legends The Demon Waltz - Xanatos, OC Halloween Fic Complete 10/22

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by red rose knight, Oct 20, 2005.

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  1. red rose knight

    red rose knight Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 3, 2001
    Title: The Demon Waltz
    Timeframe: Pre-TPM
    Characters: Xanatos, OCs
    Genre: Drama
    Summary: This is a little Halloween tale inspired by the recent Xanatos Discussion Thread challenge.
    ______________________

    The usual disclaimers apply. George Lucas owns it all; I am not making any money on this.
    ______________________

    Author?s Note: I split it into two posts because it was a bit long, the rest will be up tomorrow or Saturday. :)
     
  2. red rose knight

    red rose knight Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 3, 2001
    The Demon Waltz

    The Graan Sanga corridor that ran from the main building of the great Dansi Sikin Palace to the Sanga ballroom had been silent for many years. Its massive red doors had remained locked since the night of the Samayn Ball so many decades earlier. For legend had it, on the night of the ball, dark spirits had crossed over into this world that night and the door remained forever open.

    Golden locks entwined with blue strings dipped in the sacred waters of the Apaiti Lake as protection from the mischievous spirits clattered and fell to the floor at the will of a key and tiny hands. Giggles drifted through the quiet as one of the doors was pushed slowly open. Dry hinges cried out, echoing through the still.

    "We'll get in trouble," a small voice whispered.

    "Not if they don't catch us," whispered eight-year-old Sayana to her younger sister. She pushed the door a little wider and peered into the long corridor that gently sloped downward toward the chamber where grand balls had once been thrown and Czars had been crowned ruler of the Holy Arvani Empire.

    To the girl's surprise, warm golden lighting filled the hall from wall sconces that lined both sides. It was as if they had been expected.

    Sayana was not afraid. Master Bose of the Jandam, the palace guards, had said that the lights were always on in the hall and the Sanga Ballroom. It was tradition.

    If the lights were on, then it was safe, Sayana had reasoned and told her little sister, Tiisa. The spirits of the dead could not hurt them for they could only travel in the shadows. That's what their grandmother had told them.

    Gemma never lied.

    Taking Tiisa by the hand, Sayana pulled her into the corridor. Though the east wing was normally quiet in the late hours, the silence was even more oppressive in the hall.

    "I'm scared," Tiisa said, reluctant to step too far away from the tall doors.

    "Don't be," Sayana whispered. Her footsteps echoed along the gold and crimson tiled floor as she raced to one of the narrow windows that stretched from floor to ceiling. In the dark glass, she could see her smiling reflection, her dark hair cascading down over her lacy gown. She saw the worry in her little sister's near perfect copy of her.

    Into the dark night, and down the deep slope of the mountainside, the crown city of the Arvani Empire, Beloseya spilled down into the sea. The whitewash walls glowed in the ambiance of city lights and the full moon that loomed high overhead.

    Though even this night, the city reflected the still of the palace that watched over it. This night was the Samayn when the veil that separated the worlds of the dead and living shifted. When the righteous and faithful would lay their offerings of food and wine by their hearths and spend their evenings praying to the gods to protect their families from mischief making spirits. It is the night that mothers tuck their little ones into bed long before darkness reached across the land where they would stand guard with a candle and water from the sacred lake.

    The girls had long ago been tucked into bed, Challa, their nanny standing guard in the next room. A wise little girl who knew the palace's ancient secrets easily undid the best of plans. They had slipped through a secret door behind their bed stand and raced through the passageways leading to the east wing.

    She had stolen the key, now gripped in her small hand, from her grandmother's dresser.

    Gemma would be angry if she found out.

    Oh, but Sayana wanted to see if it were true, if the door to the other side existed.

    Tiisa gripped Sayana's hand tightly. "I'm afraid."

    "I told you," the older girl replied, "they can't hurt your. The lights are on."

    "What if they go out?"

    "They won't."

    "But they might!" Tiisa whispered loudly as she jumped up and down nervously.

    "You'll scare them away if you don't stop jumping," came the slightly irritable reply. Sayana sighed. "It will be okay, I promise. I'll protect you."

    Tiisa huffed. "I
     
  3. Princess_Arulmozhi

    Princess_Arulmozhi Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 16, 2004
    I'm in love with the story already. I love the names you've come up with - and the way you've painted an ambience that brings the scene to life. I love the way the old ball room is described, and how the ghosts are supposed to haunt the walls. And the little girls who peep in, expected to be swallowed by them. :) And then the flashback.(It is the flashback, isn't it?)

    What struck me most, maybe, was the inclusion of a mural of war, frowning down on the guests. That somehow added that touch of authenticity to the whole set up. Poor Saya, destined for this fate by Dusan. Not that she's going to succumb, is she? Oh, I love it. [face_love] And Dusan, murmuring that no one enjoys the balls he throws. It takes a great deal of guts to go against someone who controls your fate.

    Is 'Sayana' a sort of Princess-in-waiting title, before she becomes queen?

    [blockquote]Many years before you were born, before I was Czara, in the last days of the Old Republic, our empire had fallen into dark times.[/blockquote]

    And then that part about a 'union with the powerful Arcona Mineral harvest Corporation. :)

    :D So looking forward to more on the House of Arvan.
     
  4. Yodan

    Yodan Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Feb 21, 2005
    Wonderful Red! I'd almost forgotten how beautiful a writer you are.

    Your characters come alive, I saw this especially with the girls sneaking around at the beginning. Also there is so much emotion in your writing, from the anger in the Czar to the righteous indignation in Saya.

    I like the names and proper nouns you use in the story as well. Some are familiar, like Czar, but then you use Czara in the place of Czarina. So it is alien but still recognizable and utterly brilliant! :)

    I'm looking forward to seeing a certain demon...

    =D=
     
  5. Master_Noi

    Master_Noi Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 8, 2004
    Your descriptions and worlds are always so fluid and beautiful. I can't wait to see where this goes, and what happens in the story. And I can't wait to find out why Gemma is waiting there.

    The little girls all sneaking around are adorable.
     
  6. Healer_Leona

    Healer_Leona Community Squirrel Whisperer star 9 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Jul 7, 2000
    What a stunning tale. You truly capture your readers, don't you?
     
  7. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2004
    It's so wonderful to see your work up on the boards again! Sighs happily...

    Once again, you've woven a lovely and haunting picture with your words. And Xanatos??? ;) Love seeing him! =D=
     
  8. obi_ew

    obi_ew Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Apr 14, 2002
    Yay! You started posting it! [face_dancing] Beautiful descriptions of course. The little girls were adorable and the story is fascinating. Can't wait to see tall dark and evil! [face_love]
     
  9. DarthMousche

    DarthMousche Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jun 16, 2005
    Your tales are so enchanting, and this is no different. The image of the sisters sneaking out of bed for a nighttime adventure is sweet. I just love the grandmother, too, and I'm looking forward to the rest of her story.
     
  10. dianethx

    dianethx Jedi Master star 6

    Registered:
    Mar 1, 2002
    Oh, loved the backstory and the way Dusan is destroying his world without caring a whit about it. Loved the little girls and their terror/determination to see the ballroom. Loved the descriptions. Wonderful.

    Looking forward to more.
     
  11. Jedikma

    Jedikma Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2004
    You had me hooked from the first sentence. I, too, loved the curiosity of the little girls.

    Can't wait to see what happens next. :D

    As usual, beautifully written. :)
     
  12. red rose knight

    red rose knight Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 3, 2001
    Arulmozhi ? LOL, thanks! Yep, that?s a flashback and Sayana is like Saya Jr.

    Yodan ? Thank you very much. Actually, Czara was a stylistic decision, Czarina sounded to princess-like and I wanted her to feel like someone so much more powerful.

    Noi ? I can?t even remember being six or eight, I hope I got them right.

    Leona ? I try to tell the most entertaining story possible, I can?t help it if you get caught in my web. :p

    MamaVader ? Thanks! [face_blush]

    obi-evil ? Well, wait no longer, your evilness. :)

    Mousche ? Thanks! [face_blush]

    Diane ? More is on the way and thank you very much!

    kma ? Yeah, little Sayana and Tiisa were just looking for ghosts, they didn?t expect a history lesson. :)

    You all embarrass me with such lovely replies, I feel like there needs to be some ?you suck? and ?what a convoluted mess? thrown in for good measure. [face_laugh] Thank you for all the kind replies and here is the second and last part.
     
  13. red rose knight

    red rose knight Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 3, 2001
    For how long she did not know, but she remained in the middle of the hall sobbing. The sound of the orchestra seeped through the closed doors but the lovely music could do nothing to console her. Through tear-blurred vision, she could see the bruises forming on her arm where Dusan had grabbed her.

    She knew she should get up and go back to her suites or risk more of Dusan's wrath but she just did not have the strength to get up from the floor.

    "You will ruin your make-up if you keep crying like that."

    At the warm, masculine voice that possessed none of the proper Arvani accented Basic, but instead a very recognizable Coruscani, Saya looked up. Only now she realized that she had not been alone.

    Farther down the hall stood a man leaning against the wall and staring out into the dark winter night. She also became acutely aware that the corridor, usually teaming with highly trained Jandam, was empty.

    Terror gripped her.

    Dressed elegantly, with a long black surcoat, he looked ready for the ball and yet Saya could not remember seeing him inside, or ever before for that matter. Black hair was not common among the Arvani and he would have stood out.

    He straightened, but did not turn to face her.

    In the strange quiet that seemed to surround him, Saya suddenly became aware of the mess she must have looked. She tried to smooth her gown out. A shadow drew her gaze. Without a sound or seeming movement, he was standing before her. The thunder of her heart frightened her, convinced it would burst from the stress.

    Kneeling before her, Saya was able to study his handsome features and icy blue eyes. She also noted he was not truly kneeling, not in deference as she was accustomed too. His posture was more feline like as if he were going to spring into action at any moment.

    A pale hand reached out toward her and fingertips brushed along the trails of tears that marred her face. "That was quite a scene, Majesty."

    "Majesty," she said, laughing despite herself. "I am the Grand Duchess, the second child of Neroun. I am his lordship's younger sister. You do not address me so highly."

    There was only silence between them as he offered her a helping hand. At first she was reluctant, then realizing even a Grand Duchess should have more respect for herself, she took it. Her back hurt as she straightened and she knew she would be bruised for days. The flush of anger flowed through her. She should not have been so stupid to challenge Dusan so.

    "You should not think so little of yourself, Majesty."

    Glancing back to the door, she whispered, "If the wrong people hear you call me that, we may both be in great trouble, sir."

    "I have no fear," he evenly replied then glanced toward the door as well. "I do not believe you do either."

    "I am afraid of a great many things, sir."

    Once more she felt herself the center of his attention, trapped in the glint of his eyes. There was a chill about them that the golden lights that lined the corridor could not negate.

    Suddenly, she was aware that he was still holding her hand as he drew it up and laid a gentle kiss to the back of her hand. "Fear is not the enemy," he whispered as she gently pulled her hand free. "It's knowing when to face it is where true strength lies."

    "Elegant words," she whispered, her voice still soft from her crying.

    "A quality of the powerful."

    "I have no power. I have a pretty title and a large dowry. If that is what you seek, petition my brother. I am sure for the right price he will sell you my hand in marriage."

    The dark man laughed. "You are a very lovely girl, but my tastes swing in decidedly different directions." He paused. "Though my intentions are not entirely so honorable, I do have an agenda."

    "Oh?" she asked, despite that strangeness of this encounter. She straightened and pushed back the tremble in her voice. "I seem to at a disadvantage. You know who I am, but I do not know your name."

    Retreating from her, he stood before one of the tall windows that looked toward the grand ballr
     
  14. obi_ew

    obi_ew Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Apr 14, 2002
    :eek: Your Xan was so...dangerously delicious. As the best ones are. [face_love] Glad the brother got what was coming to him. Nasty jerk!:mad: And of course you left us wishing for..the rest of the story.[face_whistling]
     
  15. dianethx

    dianethx Jedi Master star 6

    Registered:
    Mar 1, 2002
    Well, Xan for all his selfish reasons, was able to help her get rid of a drunkard and a thief - I won't call him a ruler because he was not.

    Great job. Loved that you suggested that he was still alive after the Jedi got to him. LOL.
    =D=

    Oh and if you insist...
    I feel like there needs to be some ?you suck? and ?what a convoluted mess? thrown in for good measure.:p

     
  16. Master_Noi

    Master_Noi Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 8, 2004
    Oh, I love how confident and cool Xan was. *Melts into a swooning pile of mush* Yes, even when he was taking everyone's heads off. :p He was so viscious towards Dusan and the guards, yet seemed so tender towards Saya.

    *sighs happily while mumbling about day being complete*
     
  17. Layren

    Layren Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 28, 2003
    Oooh what a lovely fic, rrk! Xan was so deliciously evil and handsome and charming all at the same time :D I want to hear the other tales ;) Well done!
     
  18. PadawanKitara

    PadawanKitara Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 31, 2001
  19. Yodan

    Yodan Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Feb 21, 2005
    "You are a very lovely girl, but my tastes swing in decidedly different directions." o_O I shall say no more... :p

    Great ending! It was fun to see Xan when I knew what was coming... The czar deserved it!

    Again I wish to compliment you on the wonderful story, I love how it's told and those girls are just too cute!

    =D=
     
  20. Jedikma

    Jedikma Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2004
    I love the mood of this story. [face_love]

    Xan was evil, but I was rooting for him, just the same! :cool: And your description of him--he was just so charming and handsome and debonaire and cool. =P~ But still so evil. :eek:

    "You are a very lovely girl, but my tastes swing in decidedly different directions."

    I'm sure I'm not the only one with certain thoughts when reading that line. :p

    Wonderful story, red! =D=
     
  21. DarthMousche

    DarthMousche Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jun 16, 2005
    Your Xan had my blood racing. So attractive and dangerous and charming. I don't blame Saya for opening up to him a little more than she thought she ought to. I just love the hero role you put him in, even if it was to suit his own agenda (that's the way he works, isn't it?).

    Too bad about his tastes. :p
     
  22. Healer_Leona

    Healer_Leona Community Squirrel Whisperer star 9 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Jul 7, 2000
    Loved that Xanatos was truthful in his murderous ways. Lucky for Saya, she wasn't in this way of want he wanted or she'd have been as dead as her brother.

    Superb halloween fic.
     
  23. Yodan

    Yodan Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Feb 21, 2005
    [face_pumpkin] Upping for Halloween tomorrow... [face_pumpkin]
     
  24. red rose knight

    red rose knight Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 3, 2001
    I kind of forgot about this.

    obi-evil ? Rest of the story? I wouldn't hold out for that. Too busy working on that other Xan story, Darkly.

    Diane ? I'm not sure it would have been in character if his actions were just out of the goodness of his heart. :p

    Noi ? LOL Yeah, he was kind of fun to write.

    Layren ? Thanks!

    PK ? :)

    Yodan ? Thanks! [face_blush]

    kma ? You and the other twisted puppies, I mean Jellos?. :p

    Mousche ? Hero role? Yup, I guess you are right. It was kind of liberating to write the "good guy" with a "bad guy".I highly recommend it. :p

    Leona ? Very lucky. Thanks!

    Thanks everyone, for the kind replies, it was a fun little diversion.
     
  25. Lovely-in-Orange

    Lovely-in-Orange Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Apr 21, 2005
    Wonderful story with such rich descriptions. The little girls at the beginning were great. I loved how Xan manipulated the situation into exactly what he wanted for his own selfish reasons, but yet did a good thing for Saya and her people.
     
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