The Fortress *Ladies Only*

YODA'S LOG 3rd ENTRY
TIME: SOMETIME AFTER MY LAST ENTRY

I've been spotted. This would be a bad thing. Two Alligators are approching.

*Sounds of lightsaber being ignited and then shut off. A large roar which quickly softens to a pur*

Whew! Appearntly the gators were female and they liked the Hayden Picture in my star wars magazine. Sent the gators back with the picture tied to their necks. This should make the ladies happy. In the meantime I'm setting up a defensive barrier in case that girl that's grinning at me starts throwing things.

 

What's going on...?!

 

Hey i just joined.
Raiding the treehouse?
I'll help.....

 

[practically purring b/c she's curled up with Her Obi]

[face_satisfied grin] sorry, Master Cinta...but first come; first served - it's in the Code of Balance...and u have Christian anyway.
[whimpers slightly at this]
Obi - fights...Christian - sings.

[lightbulb appears - snuggles up to Obi more]
well; in my universe - Obi sings too so

[spies yoda hanging around outside]
sorry kiddo, but I'm immune to Hayden/Ani's charms.
[sends pet leopard to attack yoda]


[IS DELIBERATELY IGNORING BIG SIS' THREAT]

speaking of sisters...u are forgiven my Fruity widdle sis, and will remain in my good books is u abide by my Rules.

[sends over some choc as a Peace Offering]

If u don't...

 

Enjoying her time curled up with Frodo. Speaking quietly to him.

Nîn bain cyll a mîl. Cîl i fuin an gail tol. Cuina neth perian.

Looks over at Fruity.

I hope you are enjoying your time with your alfirin ion ned glîr.

 

YODA'S LOG 4TH ENTRY

My Star Wars magazine is getting torn to shreads. I took all the Obi-Wan pictures out and gave them to the lepoard that was chasing after me. The leopard went back to her owner who looks very happy. Also sent a sign that says "Only researching. Please stop trying to maul me" I hope this will help my situation. In the meantime I have set up a mortar type device that will shoot pictures of Legolas, Frodo, Obi-Wan, Anakin, and Josh Harrnet through the fortress window at hourly intervals. Mabey THIS will please them. Final note, I have yet to learn anything that will help me conquer my fear of women. If anything I'm even MORE afraid.
*Sighs*
Observation Continues

 

Well, since Frodo is taken...

Well lookee here...*shoves Tenel Ka out of the way* Hi Jacen... Everyone leave him alone! I will defend him with my martial arts skill.

 

*Still sits on the deck, grinning, and barely blinking as she continues to stare at Yoda.

 

*gets up from couch*
Excuse me my sweet Hayden. Feel free to browse the Fortress but if any women try to bring you behind the 'curtain' use your anger for something constructive, k sweets?...

*leaves Fortress and sees FD sitting on deck*
Come back in FD. You must be freezing. I'll take over.

*salutes FD*

Now... Mr. yoda. We have something to discuss here. Why are you scared of us? Well, despite our mad obsessions with hot men, our awesome style, and our enchanting good looks what else is there to be frightened of?

We are nice to nice men. We usually don't attack without reason. We fight over men. We get jealous of each other over men. We like to make our selves up to further attract men.

Doesn't it seem like you're the one walking on easy street?



*looks down again and is responded with silence*

I'll just sit out here in my lounge chair while you contemplate that... Any hot pictures of men are welcomed.

 

Hey! (runs over to Darth_FruiteCake and grabs Legolas back,) He's mine! I leave and look what happens! (soothes Legolas, assures him that he's safe now.) Yep! He's staying with me! (kiss's Legolas, and he reaturns the kiss.) See he likes ME best! (sticks out tongue at Darth FruiteCake)

 

*snatches Legolas back*

Ask any of my friends; they'll tell you he loves me to death.

*snaps her fingers, and Mathew Lawrence brings her Pepsi and Hershey's Kisses, of which she finger-feeds to Legolas and the rest of her harem*

 

Ah! First the Treehouse now here! I'm happy I'm outside for this arguement!

 

*pauses*

You know what? There might be a way to solve this rationally.

*makes about 5 clones of Legolas, sticks 3 of them in cylinders under ground, and hands one to Princess*

Have fun

P.S. If anyone else wants their own personal Legolas, come to me. I can make plenty

 

Yes, Legolas and Fruity seem quite happy together in chat rooms, except when Kirk comes... But hey, there's enough to go around I guess, and like Fruity says, CLONING may just be the solution. Some Legolas here, some Legolas there...you know how it is.

*Sits down NEXT to Jacen, knowing that Micha is watching.* Hi Jacen, how's it going, sweet?

 

Ok, Darth_fruiteCake I'm sorry, I won't steal your Legolas any more, now, I've got one of my own. (snuggles with Legolas, and sighs in contentment)

 

If you are going to fight, then I will take all the hotties away... (j/k)

EOJ

 

Oh, please, call me Fruity

Now that that's settled..... *turns to Legolas, grins, and closes the pantry door*

 

Cloning: the answer to many of life's questions.

Like- why aren't there enough Orlando Blooms for everyone?

Nice idea, Fruity!

 

YODA'S LOG 5TH ENTRY
One of the girls, Jaded Skywalker is trying to communicate with me. Why am I afraid of girls? Hmmm. Well, I guess I can answer that.

*Looks around to make sure no one else is outside. Loads issue of WHEN GOOD JEDI GO BAD MAGAZINE [Featuring Anakin Skywalker] into the launcher and shoots it to JS as a peace offering.*

[To JS]
Ok, why I'm afraid of women. Where to start? First a confession I like girls they are very nice, I'm just scared of them. Why? First off the "Social Circles" Ya know the different "groups" in a school [Jocks,Nerds,Cheerleaders, etc].

*JS Nods*
Well, I would correctly be labled in the "geek" catagory. I'm smart [a rather unpopular attribute these days], like Sci-Fi [which makes most people automaticly say I'm a geek], and I like to read [gasp!]. I don't care, I'm a geek my friends are geeks, we know it and we're damn proud. The problem is geeks are not popular.

End reason number 1. You want me to continue.

 

You know, there's something familiar about this place?

"What?"

*Mara whirls around to see Yoda outside the fortress*

Like we're being watched.

LOL, I couldn't resist.

 

*nods and motions for yoda to continue*

Please, your story is interesting and makes keeping an eye out on you a little more enjoyable.

And thanks for the pics!

 

Yoda, I am really enjoying your log entries...even though technically you're a guy and not supposed to be here.

And remember, there are plenty of geeky girls out there too. (I'm speaking from experience. ) And the geeky guys are the ones that grow up to be sweet and sensitive that all the women want after they've gotten sick of the conceited popular jerks.


*Pulls out her bottle of pink nail polish and settles down to give herself a manicure.*

 

Yeah yoda- trust me this whole Fortress just let little sighs of 'Oh how sweet' out when reading your log entry!

sari's a 100% right too!

 

YODA'S LOG 6TH ENTRY

The females apperantly like to hear why I'm afraid of them. I get the feeling that they are using me as a psych study on how the hell a boy could be afraid of girls. Oh well, at least the animal attacks have stopped.

[Continuing to his audience of 2]

Second reason is looks. I'm not ugly [I think] but I'm not a hunk either. From what I've observed, girls like hot guys. I mean come on now, how many of you in there are looking at pictures of Ferris Buller's friend with the baseball cap from ferris buller's day off? I haven't seen the movie but I've been told by about ten people that I look like him [anyone have a pic of him I'm curious]. Anyway, of course you're not! No, you're swooning over Obi-Wan, Anakin, and cloning Legolas! My rather average [or below average] looks don't really help in the women department and the fact that I'm not athletic hurts me even more.

And finally, and most damning, I'm EXTREMELY akward socially. I'm shy [except when I'm around my friends]. When there is something I really want [like girls] that I am afraid I will fail at I get even MORE shy. I mean heck, the only reason I'm speaking so candidly, is because with the internet you will never know who I am. So all in all, I don't know. Mabey I need to be more in the "in crowd", or have more muscles, or just get out of the corner at dances. Overall I'm just scared of girls. Anyway, enough rambling I'm going back to my observing. Don't mind me, I was never here, you saw nothing.

*Runs back to his observation post wondering why he ever came out of hiding to talk*

 

*Sits down NEXT to Jacen, knowing that Micha is watching.* Hi Jacen, how's it going, sweet?
Jacen, that's my little sister...so i am watching like a hawk...and Arna...i am here lurking

Oh thank the force, we have resolved the whole Legolas situation or i was going into my Darth Vader Mode...everyone happy?

Now how is everyone??? Hey Fruity, should i go into my question mode, it's the PERFECT Place

*sitting with her person, "hello sweetheart" *

Hugs
Micha