Before - Legends The Game of Death (Qui/Obi, Angst, Hurt/Comfort) *Chapter 11* Updated 12/05/09

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Glenstorm, Oct 7, 2006.

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  1. Glenstorm

    Glenstorm Jedi Knight star 1

    Mar 27, 2006
    Title: The Game of Death
    Author: Glenstorm
    Rating: PG
    Characters: Qui/Obi
    Summary: Ummm.... You'll have to read it to find out.
    Category: Angst, Hurt/Comfort.
    Here we go. My second attempt at a story. I don't quite know where this is going yet or how we're going to get there. I'm just going to take this one step at a time, but I reckon its going to be a long ride.

    Chapter One

    Qui-Gon Jinn cracked open one eye lid. His room was still dim with the last vestiges of the night, but by now a faint glow was painting the far wall in a warm golden light.

    Dawn. The start of a new day.

    The Jedi stretched his tall frame, grunting as several joints popped and cracked

    Qui-Gon chuckled. Getting older, he thought wryly, before rolling out of bed to start his morning routine. But barely had he gone two steps towards the 'fresher when noises from the kitchen drew him to a surprised halt. It seemed that one of his morning duties would not be necessary today.

    His apprentice was already awake.

    Qui-Gon stepped out into the main living area and smiled at the sight of his Padawan puttering about the kitchen, apparently gathering breakfast.

    ?Could it be,? Qui-Gon teased, ?that the notorious Obi-Wan Kenobi awakens before sunrise? Should I contact the High Council at once??

    Obi-Wan turned, blue-green eyes sparkling with a merriment that completely ruined his mock glare. ?Is there a problem, Master?? he asked, folding his arms across his chest.

    Qui-Gon smiled at the familiar stance before answering. ?Yes, its only just dawn and you're up and about,? he retorted. ?Is there a Sith Lord in your room??

    Qui-Gon only just ducked the cushion that came flying at him from behind.

    ?I doubt if you would sleep much better, Master,? Obi-Wan resumed his tasks in the kitchen as if he had never done such a thing as aim a cushion at his Master's head, ?considering what day it is.?

    Qui-Gon sobered at once. Of course he remembered what day it was. This was the day that his Obi-Wan took one step nearer to becoming a Knight. It was the day he set off on his first solo mission.

    Just a simple escort duty, the usual task reserved for Padawans on their first mission alone, but quite an important one.

    Increasing in pirate activity on the space lanes meant travellers grew nervous. So nervous, it seemed, that a certain Senator Belar had requested a Jedi presence to accompany him back to his homeworld.

    Enter his Padawan.

    Ever serious about his duty, Obi-Wan had spent most of the previous evening gathering all the information he could on Senator Belar, along with every conceivable threat between here and their destination.

    This activity had continued until even Qui-Gon decided enough was enough and insisted that his Padawan get some food and rest.

    ?You should make use of the shower and change, Master,? Obi-Wan's voice drew him from his reverie. ?I'll get our breakfast ready.?

    ?Although,? he tilted his head thoughtfully as he picked up the kettle, ?I really ought make you do it this morning. You'll need the practice unless you can find some other poor soul prepared to get your breakfast ready over the next week in my absence.?

    ?With your dubious culinary skills, Padawan, it would be a welcome relief.?

    Another cushion mysteriously flew in Qui-Gon's direction.

    ?For that,? Obi-Wan said. ?I should contact Master Yoda. A week on his stews should give you a healthy appreciation for what you have.?

    Qui-Gon folded his arms. ?I lived for weeks on Master Yoda's stews once, Padawan, as you should well remember.?

    ?Then you should agree more fully with what I'm saying.?

    Qui-Gon laughed and conceded the point. ?That I do, Padawan,? he said as he disappeared back into his room. ?That I do.?


    An hour later both Master and Padawan stood on the windswept landing platform that accommodated Senator Belar's transport.

    As they waited for the Senator to arrive, Qui-Gon cast an eye over his apprentice. To every one else O
  2. Gkilkenny

    Gkilkenny Jedi Master star 4

    Mar 27, 2004

    OMG Glenstorm you wicked person.[face_shame_on_you]

    I just love Obi-Wan and you have just presumably
    KILLED him[face_skull]

    How could you!!:eek:

    Now you have me hooked, I must read this story
    Angst and pain for Obi-Wan is just my cup of [face_coffee]

    Please add me to your PM list I love it=D=
  3. dianethx

    dianethx Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Mar 1, 2002
    Great beginning, Glenstorm. I loved the banter between the two. It shows a very warm relationship. I think that the way you set up the story was really well done, it flowed beautifully and it's made me quite curious to see what you are going to do next. Please put me on your PM list.

    Oh, and you should put links to your stories in your bio so that people can find your stories. When I find someone whose work I like in one story, I will often go to read the rest of their fics. Links are good!
  4. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Feb 5, 2004
    WOW! Incredible. =D=

    Qui-Gon staggered, wavering on his feet as if the world had collapsed. The pain and emptiness tore through him.

    Another explosion rocked the platform, completely destroying what was left of the Senator's ship. Fresh waves of heat blasted everything in their path.

    A large piece shrapnel struck the dazed and staggering Master in the shoulder, knocking him to the ground with the force of a speeding swoop bike. His head struck the permacrete and suddenly the whole nightmarish world began to fade.

    The last thing Qui-Gon remembered before unconsciousness took him was the gaping hole in the landing platform where the Senator's ship had once stood, containing the most precious thing in his life.




    Could you please PM me when you update this one?? [face_praying]
  5. Fifilla

    Fifilla Jedi Youngling star 3

    Mar 9, 2006
    Here we go. My second attempt at a story.
    If your first chapter keeps what it promises then this story will be as good as your first one!
    Great start! =D=

    Please add me to your PM list, too!
    ... and update soon!!!
  6. Luminara_Kenobi

    Luminara_Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 2

    Sep 6, 2006
    Is this going to be Obi-torture? I love Obi-torture! [face_whistling] [face_blush]


    MASTER_KAYM Jedi Youngling star 1

    Aug 3, 2004
    OMG!!! This sounds like a real good fic!! Can't wait to have more!![face_dancing]
  8. ConStar

    ConStar Jedi Youngling

    Aug 29, 2004

    Obi-Wan can't be dead - I don't care how you do it but YOU MUST BRING HIM BAAAAACK [face_praying]! Use the force if you have to - that's always a convenient explanation for everything which can't be explained :))

    Terrific beginning of a hopefully veeerrryyy loooooong story, Glenstorm. You described the relationship between Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon very good: I really loved the banter and I can feel with both Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon when the first is a little unsure about his readiness to be responsible for this mission while Qui-Gon has trouble to adjust to the fact that his padawan is quickly becoming his own man. And then something like this happens :eek: but we all know that somehow Obi-Wan was not on board the exploding starship, or was he????? No, no, of course he was not (*shakes her head vehemently in denial*)!!!

    Can't wait for the next chapter - keep up the good work!
  9. AngryWarrior

    AngryWarrior Jedi Youngling star 1

    Mar 15, 2005
    I'm speechless.

    Please don't let Obi-Wan be one with the force already. If not I look forward to all the angst and mush that is to follow. Please add me to the PM list.
  10. Valairy Scot

    Valairy Scot Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Sep 16, 2005
    Excellent! I'm hooked. Of course Obi-Wan isn't dead. But whether he was on the ship or somehow survived the blast - have no idea.

    The addressing of the emotions of Obi-Wan's first solo mission was very well done.

    I would love to be on your PM list.
  11. KELIA

    KELIA Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Jul 26, 2005
    :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:

    Obi can't be dead.....can he? [face_worried] [face_worried] [face_worried]

    What an evil, evil place to leave off.

    I'm definitely looking forward to more. If you have a PM list, please add me. [face_praying]

    Wonderful beginning

    =D= =D= =D= =D=
  12. Glenstorm

    Glenstorm Jedi Knight star 1

    Mar 27, 2006
    [:D] [:D] [:D] to all of you for your responses. Thanks, I thrive on them! And everyone who has asked I will gladly add to my PM list.

    Work on the next chapter is underway.

    And have I killed Obi-Wan? Well... I'm not letting on. You'll just have to wait for the next chapter to find out. [face_devil]
  13. KILIK

    KILIK Jedi Master star 4

    May 21, 2005
    At first I thought Obi-wan would be younger but this works to.:)

    I guess i'm kinda stuck in the ealry JA books or something.

    Please, please! Add me to your PM list I really want to see more of this.

    I doubt Obi-wan got killed, nah I bet I know what he did. o_O

    Great job. =D=
  14. AngryWarrior

    AngryWarrior Jedi Youngling star 1

    Mar 15, 2005
  15. General_Kenobi_66

    General_Kenobi_66 Jedi Knight star 3

    Oct 18, 2006
    I have to find out what happens[face_hypnotized]
    This was really good.:)
    Please don't kill my Obi!:_| :_| :_| :_| :_|

    ~The General~
  16. Force-sensitiveLyn23

    Force-sensitiveLyn23 Jedi Master star 1

    Aug 27, 2005
    Amazing! This is so good!

    Wasting no more time, the Jedi Master spun round, lightsaber hilt flying to his hand as he charged back towards the docked ship?

    ?only to be met by a solid wall of flame. Thunder assaulted his ears, shaking the very ground beneath his feet. The sudden onslaught of heat and light seared Qui-Gon's disbelieving eyes. But he could not close them. Could not shut out what was unfolding before him. The sight would be burned into his mind's eye forever.

    Hunks of red hot metal screamed through the air like the molten rain of hell. But nothing screamed louder than Qui-Gon's mind as all of his connections to Obi-Wan suddenly snapped and fell dead. Not even the buzz of unconsciousness remained.

    (I'm in denial already and the fic just started.. haha.. that's a sign of a good story)

    You'd better let him live or ....
    * tries to think of creative punishment*...
    I'll punjab you!!!
    ( sorry, just watched The Phantom of The Opera)

    Anyway, this is really good, i need more, and please pm me with updates. Thanks.
  17. NYCitygurl

    NYCitygurl Manager Emeritus star 9 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Jul 20, 2002
    Wow!! That's not cool!!! Is Obi-Wan really dead?? Poor Gui-Gon, though, having to watch /feel it happen. Though since Obi went unconcious before the explosion, I'm wondering if he wasn't somehow taken away before the ship blew up . . .

    You're doing a really good job!! I especally liked the huimor at the beginning of the story. Yoda's stews must taste awful.

    If you're starting a PM list, I'd like to be on it :)
  18. Glenstorm

    Glenstorm Jedi Knight star 1

    Mar 27, 2006
    Here we are folks! The next installment. Sorry it's so long between updates but this story is writing itself as it goes along. So please be patient with me. :D Now I'm going for a cup of [face_coffee] so I can start work on the rest of it.

    Chapter Two

    The smell of bacta was the first thing that struck Qui-Gon as he woke. That alone told him that he was in the Healer's wing. Again.

    Though he couldn't recall the reason for being here yet. The memory danced away from him, refusing to be captured by his waking thoughts. But his left shoulder was sore and he had a splitting headache. A knot at the back of his skull throbbed unmercifully.

    Well, what ever had happened, he was here and alive at least, that was the important thing. His memory would come to him in its own time. He wouldn't waste time worrying about it.

    With a mental sigh Qui-Gon began to wade through his unconsciousness towards the light of the waking world. No doubt he would find a certain starving and sleep deprived Padawan sitting by his bedside as he always did.

    He found it odd that he could not sense Obi-Wan as he woke. His mind was strangely. . . empty but Qui-Gon could put that down to the fact that he did not yet know the extent of his injuries. He might be weaker than he thought.

    Not that he would let the healers know that.

    Finally, fighting against the lead weights that seemed to want to hold them closed, he managed to open his eyes and found himself looking up at the familiar view of a stark white ceiling.

    He gave a slight smile. Nothing ever changed here. The healers really ought to think about repainting, it did get tedious waking up to the same plain white tiles.

    But that was not the important thing at the moment.

    Slowly Qui-Gon turned his head to the side, letting his eyes fall to the seat next to the bed.

    And froze. The faint smile he had been forming falling unused on his lips.

    For the chair was empty.

    Instead his eyes came to rest on those of the ward's head healer standing just to the side.


    The healer gave a sad smile. ?Qui-Gon. How are you feeling??

    ?Sore. But otherwise I'm fine.? That said Qui-Gon let his eyes fall once more to the empty chair. ?Where's Obi-Wan? Did you finally resort to sedating him this time? Or did you have Mace lock him in our quarters??

    The healer's expression faltered. ?Qui-Gon??

    ?Obi-Wan. You must have done something drastic for him not to be here?? Qui-Gon cut himself off as he saw the healer sink into the vacant seat and place a shaky hand over his mouth. ?Talan, what's wrong??

    ?Qui-Gon, what,? the healer swallowed, ?what is the last thing you remember before waking up here??

    Qui-Gon frowned at the question but started to answer. Doing his best to gather together the pieces of his ragged memory, he closed his eyes. ?I was accompanying Obi-Wan to the landing platform. We were waiting for the Senator to arrive. . .? Qui-Gon trailed off as the memories started to come back more easily. He remembered the waiting, about teasing Obi-Wan for his nerves and regretting how close his Padawan was to taking his Trails. He remembered Senator Belar and their meeting, remembered exchanging the parting words with Obi-Wan and watching until he too had disappeared aboard the transport before turning and walking away himself.

    And then. . .



    Qui-Gon's memory ignited. Bursting into flames behind the darkness of his eyes. He was turning. Running. The ground shook beneath his lurching feet. Pain, heat and anguish was all he could feel. Explosions, light and fire were all he could see.


    Qui-Gon's eyes snapped open. He found himself unable to breathe as if all the air was sucked from the room. , his senses flailed out wildly for his Padawan. But there was nothing. Just a yawning emptiness in his mind where Obi-Wan had once been.

    Talan saw the flames branded in Qui-Gon's eyes and answered the anguished gaze now boring into his own. ?There was a bomb,? he said. ?No one yet knows the reason fo
  19. AngryWarrior

    AngryWarrior Jedi Youngling star 1

    Mar 15, 2005
    :_| That is my feeling right now. Poor Qui-Gon, no one really understands the bond they had/have.
    I hope that Obi-Wan is not really dead and that its just a very powerful force suppressor that makes it seem like he is no longer of this world.
    Can't wait till more. :_|
  20. Valairy Scot

    Valairy Scot Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Sep 16, 2005
    Good grief...I'm in mourning, too. Early in the story, here,

    He could almost see his Padawan there now. Blue-green eyes lit with that understated joy at seeing his Master safely returned.

    So strong was that sight in Qui-Gon's mind that every thing else seemed to fade away for a moment and he found himself taking an unconscious step forward?

    ?Master Qui-Gon??

    I thought Obi was coming back as a blue ghostie. Now, I'm not so sure, but he will be back. Right? Right!

    Slowly Qui-Gon turned his head to the side, letting his eyes fall to the seat next to the bed.

    And froze. The faint smile he had been forming falling unused on his lips.

    For the chair was empty.
    :_| Ouch, that hurt.

  21. dianethx

    dianethx Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Mar 1, 2002
    Oh, poor Qui-Gon to wake up looking for Obi-Wan and being told that he was dead. Then to have to go back to their quarters and see all the things that were there that last day. :_|

    Great job. Looking forward to more.
  22. General_Kenobi_66

    General_Kenobi_66 Jedi Knight star 3

    Oct 18, 2006
    So sad!:_| :_| :_|
    Please don't let him be dead!:_|
    Sad, but very good.
    Thx for the PM:D
    *stares at the screen in hopes of another post*[face_hypnotized]

    ~The General~
  23. NYCitygurl

    NYCitygurl Manager Emeritus star 9 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Jul 20, 2002
    :_| :_| That was so sad!!! But you did an amazing job exploring the depths of Qui-Gons pain, even though you about made me cry. I love the detail and description you put into it; I can really picture Qui-Gon's surroundings and sympathize with his emotions. Amazing job =D=
  24. Force-sensitiveLyn23

    Force-sensitiveLyn23 Jedi Master star 1

    Aug 27, 2005
    :_| :_| This isn't true! Obi can't be dead!!
    This is so sad! I feel Qui's grief for him! Update soon and make sure Obi shows up alive, pronto. Or else i'll strangle you with Roger's plaid pants! ( sorry, a RENT joke)
  25. Layren

    Layren Jedi Master star 5

    Oct 28, 2003


    It was too much to bare and he began to keen his loss to the emptiness.

    Anyone listening to those raw cries would not have thought they listened to the voice of a Jedi Master or the voice of a hardened warrior, but rather to that of a broken man.

    A broken man who had forever lost his best friend.

    Awwwwwww that was so heartbreakingly sad!! Please don't leave Qui in such misery... he needs his Obi to make it all better... *hugs him*

    If you've got a PM list, I'd like to be on it :)
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