Saga The Journal of Jax Pavan [DDC 2014] Complete!

Thank you Revanfan1, earlybird-obi-wan and Nyota's Heart for reading and taking the time to review. I don't think I would have finished this journal without your support.

Thanks for reading!!

This is another short post.
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Entry 44


I didn’t go back to dance instruction after my shower. I needed time alone to think. I dried off with a towel and dressed in comfortable shorts and tunic. I was still embarrassed over my reaction to Sacha’s touch, but to be honest it wasn’t totally unexpected. She is a beautiful, kind, engaging woman whose company I enjoy immensely.

When I was a Jedi I had a large extended family of men and women who I shared my life with. We lived together, ate together, trained together. I was constantly with my friends and comrades. They were people who I looked forward to seeing daily…friends that brought enjoyment into my life. After Flame Night that all changed. I tried to cut myself off from my emotions, compartmentalize my pain, and become a loner…and it worked for a while.

But then I was reunited with my old friend Laranth Tarak. Later I met up with Den and I-Five… and, unfortunately, that traitorous Zeltron Dejah Duare. I started to enjoy the company of others once again. I’m sure Dejah’s addictive pheromones helped pry me out of my shell, but that was short lived. After she betrayed me to the Inquisitors I fell back into my old habits. It took Laranth’s persistence and some strange Force bond to break through my walls and bring me back to the living…and then she died saving my life.

I sighed deeply as I thought back to all the misery I’ve suffered over the last few years. I wanted to be happy and surrounded by friends, but my confidence of that lasting was severely shaken. People around me die. They die and suffer.

On top of my dresser was the small centuries-old Miisai tree given to me as a gift from Laranth. I picked it up and placed it on the floor in the middle of my room before I sat down cross-legged in front of it. The little tree always brought me peace. Perhaps today it will bring me insight. I closed my eyes and relaxed my body and mind until I dropped into a deep meditative state. I thought back to the Jedi Code taught to me as a boy, repeating it in my head like a mantra.

There is no emotion, there is peace.
There is no ignorance, there is knowledge.
There is no passion, there is serenity.
There is no death, there is the Force.


Hours later my eyes popped open as a disappointed frown tugged on my lips. I was still tense and confused. My thoughts kept drifting back to Sacha and every time they did a deep pang of guilt washed over me. Nobody could replace Laranth in my heart.

‘Letting somebody else into your heart doesn’t mean I will be gone from your memory.’

My eyes widened at the sound of Laranth’s voice. I looked around my room, but I was alone. My heart started to beat rapidly not knowing if I imagined hearing her or not. “Laranth?” I whispered. “Is that you?”

I waited for a response but the room remained silent. Before she died, Laranth told me she would always be with me through the Force. Was she trying to communicate to me from the other side? “Laranth…I love you.” My voice was raw with emotion as I closed my eyes and allowed the Force to flow through me.

“I love you,” I repeated in a coarse whisper. I concentrated, trying to steady my breathing and calm my nerves. Over the drumming of my heartbeat I thought I could make out a voice, low and distant. “Live again, Jax. Live and love.” The sound was so faint I wasn’t sure if I actually heard it. I quickly pulled out of my trance knowing immersing myself so deeply in the Force was never a good idea. The Force essence of the Miisai tree could mask my Force signature somewhat, but I shouldn’t push my luck. There was too much at stake.

I stood and returned the tree to its normal location on my dresser. I looked down at my hands and realized I was trembling. This meditative session had me deeply shaken.

Did I hear Laranth?

There were legends of powerful Jedi returning from the dead in a non-corporeal form…but if any Masters at the Temple knew of this technique they never shared that knowledge with their students. I couldn’t have heard her.

I sat on my bunk feeling empty, alone and heartbroken. I considered embracing the Jedi philosophy of non-attachment. I pondered that possibility for a moment before rejecting it. Despite the horrific emotional pain I suffered from the death of Laranth…I’m glad I loved her. My attachment to my friends was the only thing that brought joy into my life. The galaxy under Palpatine is a horrible, despotic empire full of death and despair. My friends are my only bright light during these dark days.

“I will always love you,” I whispered softly hoping that somehow she heard. I then stretched out on my bed and closed my eyes, hoping beyond hope for sweet dreams of my lost love.

 

Fantastic reflections and very realistic ponderings of the past losses and future joys and risks. Jax has it right about friendships.

 

Poor Jax. Dude's got it rough.

 

LOL at everyone having a giggle at Jax's dancing troubles. (And I-Five dancing in heels, which was a thing of glory. ) Guess that's one drawback of living at close quarters on the ship. There's always a peanut gallery to witness and comment on anything embarrassing. Still, the friendships are more than worth it and he knows it. It's hopefully a good sign that he can perceive Laranth encouraging him to go live his life, and reminding him that she'll be there. There will always be some grief, but he has traveled a long way and maybe it's time to take the next step in moving on. Great chapters!

 

Thanks. I can't imagine how tough it would be for Jax. It would be like you going to a boarding school all your life and then suddenly it burns down and kills almost everybody. Can you imagine every person you were friends with suddenly dying? And then he is reunited with an old friend, they fall in love, and then she dies saving his life. He has to be suffering from PTSD. He had a messed up life.

He does. I hope to give him some happiness that he never found in the profics.

I am thinking she did try to talk to him. From the Prequels we find out the ability to become a Force ghost was rediscovered by Gui Gon and taught it to Obi-Wan. Because of this I assume the Jedi at the temple don't know how to do this. So perhaps Laranth tried to come back to talk to Jax, but was only mildly successful.

Thanks everybody for reading! I really appreciate the support and encouragement!

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Entry 45

Our mission to Alderaan has begun. We traveled to the core-world planet aboard our ship, but flying under a falsified transponder name Nyast.

We exited hyperspace and moved into the planet’s orbit. Alderaan is a beautiful world, a blue and green jewel of the galaxy. Everything I have read about the planet was amazing. It is the realm of poets, artists, and chefs catering culinary delights. I would love to spend time there as a tourist, but I know that’s impossible. Every minute I remain on planet is dangerous.

I waited on the flight deck feeling extremely uneasy in my crisp blue and red ceremonial uniform worn by Kwarron royalty. Sacha looked equally uncomfortable in her blue, floor-length, lace up gown made of expensive taffeta. Den and Magash were at the ship’s controls wearing standard pilot garb. I-Five was in his police chassis and played the part of a security droid. I thought it might be suspicious that we arrived to the planet in a less than royal ship, but Aren told me many high ranking officials will often fly in unassuming spacecraft to avoid pirates. I can only hope we can blend in with the hundreds of royal visitors arriving at the capital spaceport.

After getting clearance to land we exited the ship and stood in a short queue designated for dignitary visitors. Our fake visas and identifications were barely looked at while we passed through customs.The port was extremely busy with a constant flow of ships arriving and departing. Sacha and I went alone, leaving the rest of the crew with the ship.We didn’t need a Sullustan, Zabrak and police droid drawing attention to us. We arranged for our luggage to be shipped to our hotel before we hailed a taxi and traveled to exclusive accommodations near the royal palace.I don’t know where Aren and Degan got the credits to pay for this type of extravagance, but it emphasized the importance of this mission.We could have purchased a spacecraft with the credits they spent just on clothing and lodging.

After checking into our hotel Sacha and I took a lift to the upper levels of the building. When I opened the door to our room Sacha gasped at the grandeur before she caught herself and slipped back into character. We closed the doors behind us and gapped at the splendor of the suite. The interior was decorated in rich hues, from the silk wall coverings to custom drapery. Inside was a stocked wet bar, a huge holonet projector, two terraces, sweet smelling bouquets of flowers sitting on posh side tables, and in the middle of the chamber was a large king sized bed with a leather headboard, fur throws and accent pillows. The extravagance was overwhelming for somebody who once pursued an austere life in the Jedi Temple and later, after Flame Night, spent months living in abject squalor in the lower levels of Coruscant.

“Wow,” was all I could say and remained slack jawed until I made a conscious effort to close my mouth. I slowly walked around the room taking in its beauty. I turned to Sacha. “The party is tomorrow. What do you want to do until then?”

“We should probably stay hidden away. We don’t want to blow our cover prior to the party.” Sacha walked over to a door within the suite and peered in. “Jax! Look at this tub!”

I went over to where she was pointing. Inside the expansive ‘fresher was a huge bathtub big enough for six people. I moved further into the room and noticed it was a whirlpool tub with multiple jets around the interior. There was also a toilet within the room and next to it was a strange contraption that looked like a cross between a sink and a toilet. I knelt down next to the strange fixture and turned a knob located at the back of the porcelain bowl. Immediately a stream of water shot up from a spray nozzle at the bottom of the basin. “I think this is a bidet. I’ve heard of them, but I’ve never seen one.”

Sacha made a face. “If you want to drink from that gross water fountain, go ahead, be my guest. I’m going to stick to the complementary sparkling wine I saw in the main room.”

I laughed. “It’s not a water fountain.”

She crossed her arms over her chest and frowned in concentration. “Then what is a bidet for?”

I looked back at the ‘fresher fixture and tried to figure out the best way to describe what it did. “After you use the toilet you transfer over here to this bowl and…sort of squat…and um…turn on the water and clean your…”

“Your what? What is it supposed to clean? Is it like the emergency eye washers in the maintenance wing?”

My eyes narrowed as I stood. “You know exactly what this is, don’t you? You just like to see me squirm.”

She broke out in laughter. “Sorry Jax, but you turn such a lovely shade of red when embarrassed.” She went over to the bidet and pushed a button causing a stream of warm air to shoot out from the sides of the basin. I assumed this was used to dry one’s backside. “It can also act as a hairdryer,” she joked.

“Funny.”

“Oh, bathrobes!” Hanging on the wall were expensive looking white wraps with the hotel’s crest embroidered on the front. “I’m going to get out of this horrible dress.” She turned her back to me. “Can you get the zipper?”

I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Sure.” I quickly unzipped her dress and then swiftly exited the ‘fresher making sure to close the door on my way out. I unbuttoned the stiff collar of my uniform and went to the bar to pour myself a drink. I took a swig of whiskey and shuddered. I was never much of an alcohol drinker, but I needed something to steady my nerves. I couldn’t wait until tomorrow. I knew I might end up spotted by Imperial spies or Sith Inquisitors, but right about now being alone in a hotel room with a gorgeous woman was making me more nervous than a Sith or Stormtrooper ever could.

Ever since that day we danced together, I’ve been having a hard time getting Sacha out of my head and now I find myself flustered around her. While training for this mission I would catch myself staring at her, admiring her porcelain smooth face framed against her silky black hair. Often Sacha would sense my ogling and would turn to me and smile. This usually resulted in me forcing my attention from her and to anything else in the room. I’m sure at this point she believes I have a bizarre fascination with the top of my boots.

I slugged down another drink before removing my high collar uniform jacket and tossing it over the back of a nearby chair. I tucked my undershirt into my trousers as I explored the amenities of the room. I turned when I heard the ‘fresher door open and my heart nearly stopped when Sacha came out wearing only the bathrobe. I later discovered she had undergarments on underneath, but the damage was done. My mind went blank as my pulse pounded, my stomach fluttered, and I felt a strange tightness in my chest. I wasn't sure how I would survive the night.

I jumped when the entry chime rang and I ran over to the door, thankful for the distraction. Outside was a porter delivering our luggage.

“Good,” I said to Sacha with a grin. “I’ve been wanting to get out of these heavy wool trousers for the longest time.”

“Same here.” She a paused and then clarified. “I mean I couldn’t wait to get out of my dress...not to see you out of your trousers.”

I had to smile. “I know what you meant.”

I changed into casual shorts and tunic. Sacha, to my relief, put on a more modest outfit consisting of shorts and shirt, but she kept the bathrobe on over her attire.

We had a nice night. We ordered room service and had a fantastic dinner delivered to our room. We drank the complementary sparkling wine and then watched a holovid. It must not have been a very good flick because we both fell asleep on the couch. I woke up in the middle of the night with Sacha’s head propped on my shoulder. I slowly stood making sure she didn’t fall over. “Sacha. Wake up.” She definitely drank a little too much wine because she was in a deep, deep slumber. I gently lifted her off the couch and carried her to the enormous bed. I used the Force to pull back the covers and I slipped her in between the sheets. I readjusted her bathrobe to maintain her modesty before covering her up. I looked over to the leather couch and then to the roomy bed. I planned to sleep on the couch, but that didn’t look comfortable. I went to the other side of the bed and climbed in. There was almost two meters between Sacha and me, so I assumed she wouldn’t be too upset by the sleeping arrangements. I closed my eyes and quickly drifted off to sleep.

Entry 46

Last night I had the most amazing dream. I was once again with Laranth. We were holding each other, caressing…kissing. It was such a sweet dream that I never wanted to wake up. It wasn’t until I heard Sacha’s confused voice that I was ripped from my slumber. “Jax? Are you awake?”

I opened my eyes and realized I was snuggled up next to Sacha with my arms wrapped around her body. I immediately let go and jumped to the other side of the bed. “Force Sacha! I’m sorry. I was dreaming of Laranth.”

She sat up and tightened her bathrobe while looking at me sadly. “I know. You kept repeating her name.”

I sat on the far edge of the bed and buried my head in my hands. “Oh Gods! I’m so embarrassed.”

“Don’t be.”

I shook my head. “No…I almost…I wasn’t aware….I was dreaming.”

“I know Jax.” Her voice sounded strained. I could tell she was irritated and I couldn’t blame her.

“I’ll sleep on the couch from now on.I’m so, so sorry.”

She shook her head. “It’s okay.”

“No it’s not okay,” I sputtered. “Thank the Force you woke me up. I feel terrible about all…”

“Jax!” Sacha barked impatiently. “Don’t get weird on me. I’m not mad. I don’t mind.”

“How could you not mind?” I asked incredulously. “I practically molested you. If I didn’t wake up…I don’t know what would have happened.”

She gave me a roll of her eyes. “Jax, I’m not helpless. If your advances weren’t wanted I am sure a swift punch to the groin would have saved my virtue.”

“What?” I was confused by what she said. “If my advances weren’t wanted?” I whispered. “What do you mean?”

She looked away and I saw a blush color her face. “I thought I made things very clear to you, but you don’t seem to take a hint.” She looked back at me and smiled softy. “I like you, Jax.”

I heard her words, but the meaning didn’t sink in. My mind was still reeling from the predicament I got myself into. “I like you too, Sacha.”

She exhaled loudly as if frustrated. “Jax, I really, really like you.” She closed her mouth and I could tell she was struggling with some internal conflict. “I’m interested in you.”

When I didn’t say anything she continued. “Interested in like maybe dating, getting to know each other on a more…intimate level.” She shook her head in disbelief. “Are you the only one who hasn’t figured that out yet? Why do you think I-Five kept pushing our hips together while we learned to dance? Magash even decided to help me out by prompting us to slow dance. Den said we looked awkward and encouraged us to hold each other tighter. They all know I’m interested in you.” She stopped talking and stood, tightening her robe and turning away from me.

“I’m sorry. Obviously I didn’t know.” It was true; I really didn’t have a clue…although now a lot of things were making much more sense such as Sacha asking Magash for dating advice, or Sacha always trying to talk or comfort me. I don’t know why I didn’t see it…unless I didn’t want to see it. Laranth’s death had me tied up in knots. I was so emotionally damaged by my loss that I stopped noticing a lot of things around me. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to ignore you.”

She gestured in a sad way. “It’s my fault…and now things are extremely awkward between us.”

I took a couple deep breaths trying to clear my head and stop the fluttering in my stomach. “Sacha, don’t feel awkward. This is my fault for being so dense.”

“I should have made my intentions clearly known.” She fidgeted with her bathroom sash before continuing. “I should have been more obvious.”

I thought back to all the missed signals and, to be truthful, in hindsight I don’t know how she could possibly have been more obvious. I gave her a warm smile. “I guess you could have put a rope around my neck and claimed me as your own.”

She spun around with a gasp. “Did Magash tell you she told me that?”

My grin grew wider. “No it was Den and I-Five.”

Sacha blanched. “I’m going to kill them.”

I chuckled and walked over to her hoping to rectify this situation. “Sacha, you are beautiful and funny and kind. I love being around you. You make me feel happy. You know how to comfort me. To be honest, if I wasn’t mourning the loss of my first love, it would be me pursuing you.”

It didn’t look like she believed me. “Really?”

“Really.” I embraced her tenderly and put a chaste kiss on the top of her head. “I don’t want to lose you as a friend.”

Tears pooled in her eyes. “You won’t.”

“Sacha, when I feel…that I can move on from my loss. I guarantee you will be the first one to know…and then I-Five will probably overhear and tell the rest of the gang.”

She laughed before burying her head into my chest. “I can wait.”

“Good.” I looked at the chrono on the bedside table and realized it was still in the middle of the night. “Let’s go back to bed. I’ll sleep on top of the covers.”

“You don’t have to do that.”

“No, I do. I don’t trust myself with such a stunning woman in my bed.” I leaned in and kissed her lightly on the cheek.

Sacha blushed a deep crimson. “Good night Jax. Sweet dreams.”

“The same to you.” I laid down on the top of the covers as she slipped between the sheets. It took me a very long time to fall asleep with Sacha’s words repeating in my head.

‘She likes me.’ I finally drifted off to sleep with a smile on my lips.

 

Wonderful suite they have there and a terrific conversation. The air is cleared up between them. I think Jax is closer than he's ever been. Now that Sacha knows she's not in a hopeless cause, I know she'll be patient.

 

It's about time Jax got it. Stars, the guy was oblivious.

 

I wouldn't recommend drinking that water...

Ouch. Poor Sacha; that would be both awkward and an emotional gutpunch -- and Jax not intending to play on her feelings at all. They really have the worst luck, sometimes. But at least it got a needed bit of information out into the air. It pretty much takes a brick to the head for Jax to notice what's going on with the people around him (which is in keeping with the books -- he's Captain Oblivious most of the time.)

 

Thanks! I think she can be patient, but I believe the Force wants those two together.

Thanks! He is totally oblivious. He was that way in the profics also.

I know that has to hurt. At least Sacha knows his past with Laranth. It's not like Jax was dating Sacha and said that. He isn't dating her and he is having a dream about a woman he loved. Still, it has to be tough for Sacha who has a major crush on Jax. Now she feels like she is competing with a dead woman.

Thanks everybody for reading! I really appreciate the reviews. At least I know somebody is reading this story.


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Entry 47

We arrived at the palace the next day and the situation quickly became interesting…and by interesting I mean stressful. The first thing I noticed was a number of high-ranking Imperials among the guests. That had me wondering if Aren and Degan were completely wrong about the Alderaan Royals having sympathy for the rebellion. Or perhaps the Emperor would have found it suspicious if Imperials were omitted from the guest list. I am hoping it is the latter.

Sacha and I were in a long reception line waiting to be formally introduced to Queen Breha Organa and her husband Prince Bail Organa. I looked down the queue and spotted the birthday girl standing between her parents. Princess Leia Organa was a cute dark haired toddler garbed in a frilly white dress. Despite her age she exuded an air of royalty about her. I was amazed they could teach such pose and patience to a child so young.

As we crept slowly up the line I desperately tried to think of a way to broach the subject of the rebellion to the guests in attendance. Even if I found a rebel collaborator how could I possibly convince them that I, a completely unknown entity, could be trusted? Also, how would I know if I could trust them? I suppose I could use the Force to judge their reactions, but that was dangerous on so many levels. First of all, just talking about the rebellion could get you thrown into a cell with Imperial interrogators and second there was a chance that undercover Inquisitors were present in the room. I had to be very careful.

When we arrived to the front of the reception line a young officer asked for our names, title and planet. He then introduced us to the Queen and Prince. “Your Highnesses, may I introduce Duke and Dutchess Roskin of Kwarron.” The Prince offered me his hand in greeting. I shook it hoping my palms weren’t sweating. I then side stepped down the line until I was standing in front of the little Princess.

“This is our daughter Leia,” Prince Bail Organa said proudly.

I bent slightly at the waist, bowing to the child when I felt a ripple in the Force. I gazed at the little girl and nearly gasped in surprise. She was bathed in a bright aura. I saw ribbons of color emanating from her, swirling Force tendrils extending out and into multiple dimensions and alternate futures. This young girl was connected to the galaxy in a powerful way. I followed those connections and I could see images of the Queen and Prince, a young woman I didn’t recognize and then another person…one I knew very well. In my shock I whispered the name of my old friend, “Anakin…” I immediately closed my mouth and hoped I wasn’t overheard. There was no mistake, this child had a close connection to Anakin Skywalker…not the person he is now, but the brave hero of the Clone Wars.

“What did you say?” Bail Organa’s voice was tense and contained a tinge of panic.

I straightened and tried to calm myself down. I knew the Queen and Prince had adopted the baby…could Anakin be the father?

“Duke Roskin, please repeat what you said, ” the Prince asked again, this time more sharply.

I looked to him and back to the small child. I forced a smile on my face. “Excuse me, your Highness. I said Aquin, it is an ancient form of greeting on my home world. I often forget those not from Kwarron would not understand this archaic expression. I apologize for my rudeness.”

The Queen appeared to relax, but I could feel Bail Organa’s suspicion reverberating through the Force. We stood there for an awkward moment before Sacha broke the silence. “It is an honor to be here. Thank you for inviting us your Highnesses.”

Bail Organa glanced between Sacha and me before he took Sacha’s hand and brought it up to his lips. I thought he was going to kiss her, but he stopped short and gave Sacha a small nod of his head. “Thank you for coming to our little celebration.”

Sacha flashed him a brilliant smile that appeared to assuaged some of the tension and suspicions.

“The honor is ours your Highness.” Sacha smiled warmly down to Bail’s daughter before we moved to the queen and greeted her cordially.

When we made it out of the reception line I sighed deeply as relief rushed through my body. That was a close call. For the next hour Sacha and I ate sparingly from the appetizer table and mingled with the guests. I tried to nonchalantly bring up the rebellion, but nobody wanted to venture into that conversation while Imperials were interspersed throughout the ballroom. When the orchestra began playing a slow, melodious tune, I turned to Sacha and offered her my hand. “May I have this dance?”

She smiled brightly. “Of course, my Duke.”

We made our way out to the large dance floor and began to move to the music. Sacha leaned into my body and rested her head on my shoulder. Her nearness, the scent of her perfume, the heat of her skin made my heart flutter and my breathing rapid. She obviously felt my anxiety. She leaned back slightly and gazed into my eyes. “Your heart is pounding. Do you sense danger?”

I took a couple deep breaths trying to calm my beating heart. “Sacha…” I stopped not knowing what to say. I finally gave her a weak smile. “No danger…it’s just being around you that gets my heart beating rapidly.”

Her lips twitched into a shy and delighted smile as she lowered her head back to my shoulder. “Are you just saying that to make me feel better?”

“Better about what?”

“About my embarrassing revelation last night?”

I leaned my head down so I could whisper in her ear. “No, and don’t be embarrassed. I’m flattered.”

“But not interested at this time,” she said softly.

“That’s not true. I’m very interested, but conflicted.”

“You’re sweet for saying so, Jax.”

“I say it because it’s true. I love being around you.” I pulled her slightly closer to my body. “Let’s just have fun while we’re here.”

“Okay.”

She relaxed in my arms and I was really starting to enjoy myself when two armed guards came up to us. They gave us a respectful bow before speaking. “Duke and Duchess, the Prince requests your presence in his private quarters.”

I turned to Sacha, her eyes wide with apprehension. I took her hand in mine and gave it a reassuring squeeze. “Of course.”

We followed the men out of the massive room, down a long hall and past two wooden double doors. Inside Prince Bail Organa sat at his desk. As we entered the room the guards shut the doors behind us and took a position blocking our exit.

“Please sit down.” The Prince gestured at two chairs placed in front of his ornate desk. As we sat he steepled his fingers under his chin as he scrutinized us silently for a long, heart pounding moment. “I checked with my staff and they did send an invitation to Kwarron. I have a historian who is an expert on Kwarron language and culture and he adamantly denies there is any ancient greeting called Aquin.”

I knew he was bluffing. Kwarron has been in isolation for centuries. It is doubtful there is an expert on Kwarron culture on Alderaan. “I assure you, your Highness, there is such a greeting. Perhaps if I can talk to your historian I can enlighten him.”

Bail leaned forward in his chair and glared at me. “You said Anakin. I heard it distinctly. My wife heard it…and you said it while gazing at my daughter. Why did you say Anakin?”

Sacha was fidgeting with her dress, her eyes cast down. She doesn’t know anything about Anakin Skywalker. She had to be confused by this discussion. I was a bit confused also. Did Anakin Skywalker father a child and, if so, how did the Organa family end up raising her? Did they know Anakin was now Darth Vader? Did Vader give them his daughter to raise? There was so many unknowns. I straightened in my chair and simply asked, “Do you wish to discuss Anakin Skywalker in front of your guards?”

Bail blanched when I said the Skywalker name. He motioned for his guards to leave. When they protested he pulled a blaster out of his desk drawer and set it on the table top. “I am quite capable of protecting myself. Please leave.”

When they exited he sat back in his chair crossing his arms over his chest. “What do you know of Anakin Skywalker?”

I tried to get a read on the Prince but I couldn’t gather any indication on where he stood when it came to the Empire and the rebellion. I decided to relax and let the Force guide me. “I know Anakin Skywalker is now Darth Vader.”

His eyes narrowed, but I didn’t register any surprise. “And how does that relate to my daughter?”

The only way I could reveal the answer to that question was to admit I was a Jedi. “I knew Anakin while he was at the Temple. Your daughter…I could sense her connection to him in the Force. I suspect he is the father of your daughter.”

Prince Organa rose out of his seat. “Who the hell are you?” The words came out between clenched teeth.

“I am Jax Pavan, Jedi Knight.” He gave me a scrutinizing glare before he sat back down, his hand hovering near his weapon. I could have easily disarmed him, but I wanted to make an ally, not an enemy. “I’m not here to hurt you or your daughter.”

“Then why are you here?”

“I heard the Alderaan government had anti-Imperial leanings. I wanted to help.”

The Prince’s eyes narrowed further under a furrowed brow. “The Jedi are all dead. I saw them killed before the Temple was burned to the ground. So, how do I know you are a Jedi?”

I put my hand out and his blaster jumped into my palm. Before he could react I returned the weapon to him handle first. “I am a Jedi.”

Bail ran a hand over his face. “I don’t need a Jedi. The Empire is actively hunting you.”

“We know,” Sacha whispered to herself.

Bail glanced at her for the first time. “Are you also a Jedi?”

“In training.”

He shook his head. “I have great respect for the Jedi Order, so I’m not going to turn you in, but you must leave.”

“We will,” I assured him. “We came her with a message from the Antarian Rangers. They want to join in your cause.”

Bail gave a coarse laugh. “There isn’t anything to join. Your friends have been misinformed. Now please leave the palace and do not return.” I could see the disappointment in Sacha’s face as we both slowly stood fully expecting to be arrested when we exited the room. “Wait.” The Prince motioned us back into our seats. “You said you sensed my daughter’s connection to Anakin in the Force. Can Inquisitors sense this connection? Could Darth Vader?”

“I don’t know. If a person is strong in the Force they could have a recognizable Force signature, but that’s not how I picked up the connection. I have a rare ability to see auras and through these auras I can see that person’s connection to the universe. An evil person would have a dark aura. Good people has a light halo of energy around them.”

“And what color was my daughter’s aura?”

“I’ve never seen such a bright glow. She is important. You must protect her and train her to protect herself. I sense she may be the key to bringing down Palpatine’s Empire.” I hesitated a moment. “Does she know who her father is…who he is now?”

The Prince shook his head. “No, she’d be too young to understand anyway. We plan on telling her she’s a war orphan. I don’t need her searching for her biological father. Darth Vader tried to kill Leia’s birth mother when she was pregnant and only weeks from delivery. She died shortly after giving birth. As far as I know, Darth Vader believes he killed her and terminated the pregnancy.”

I sat back in my chair shocked by this revelation. I knew Vader was evil, but even I found it hard to believe Anakin could kill the woman carrying his child. “It is probably best that information remains secret. If she ever has the misfortune of meeting Darth Vader, you don’t want her emotions betraying her.”

Bail heaved a sigh. “Do you have a way for me to contact your Rangers?”

I smiled broadly. “Yes, I have a data stick with information on how to contact them. It is through a secure communication channel, heavily encrypted and untraceable.” I reached into my pocket and pulled out the data stick. “I have to activate it first.” I put my thumb on one side and pressed down. I then handed it to Sacha who did the same. A small red-light on the device blinked indicating it was active. I handed it to the Prince who bounced the device in the palm of his hand before closing his fist around it. “I can’t guarantee you anything, but I will consider making contact.” He pointed to the door. “Now get out of here before you get caught.”

“Thank you,” both Sacha and I whispered in relief before rising and exiting the office. As we walked down the long corridor I gave Sacha a sidelong glance. “The crew is set to rendezvous with us tomorrow. Should we contact them now?”

She shook her head. “Let’s keep to the schedule.”

I nodded knowing she was right, but also realizing we would have to spend another night together. I don’t know how much more temptation I could stand.

 

Whew, that was close!!! But Bail's innate sense of perceptiveness and fairness came through in the end. Loved what Jax said to Sacha.

 

Yikes...that could've been a bad situation! Good thing Bail is level-headed.

 

Bail Organa is a good guy. I wish we saw more of him in the PT instead of Jar Jar.

Yeah, it could have ended up badly. I mean, Bail could have thought Jax was a Sith. I guess he figured if Jax was a Sith he would have told Vader and Leia would be taken to the Emperor already.

Thanks everybody for reading. I really need to move this story along so I can complete it by the end of the year.
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Entry 48

I should have called for the crew to bring the ship in early. Waiting just made me nervous. What if the Imperials spotted us leaving the party early? What if an Inquisitor was on planet? So many things could go wrong.

“Jax will you relax. The mission is a success.” Sacha went to the wet bar cooling unit of our hotel room and brought out a cold bottle of wine. “Let’s celebrate.”

My stomach was a flutter of nerves. I didn’t think I could hold down any alcohol. I had already taken a hot shower in an attempt to sooth the knots out of my muscles, but that only gave me warm, wet, knotted muscles. I guess having a drink wouldn’t hurt. “Sure.”

I decided to distract myself further by watching the holonet. I ended up on the news channel where I was subjected to Imperial propaganda and human supremacy ideology.

Sacha sat next to me and handed me a glass of wine. We both were now garbed in loose tunics and shorts having stripped out of those uncomfortable formal clothing as soon as we arrived to our room. I smiled and took a small sip. “Thanks.” I put the glass aside and returned to channel flipping.

“How does your special Jedi power work? Can you tell the future with it?”

I gave a shrug. “I can see ribbons of color. The lighter the aura the better. Dark ribbons usually mean the person is currently evil or will fall prey to evil. I can sometimes see how that person is connected to others. Occasionally I will see things that might be in that person’s future, but unless the person looks older in the vision, I really wouldn’t know if I was seeing the future or the past.”

“And Organa’s daughter has a bright aura?”

I put down the remote control and turned to her. “It is the brightest I have ever seen. There was a swirl of ribbons of white around her. She will bring change to the galaxy.”

She leaned back into the cushion of the couch. “I gathered from your conversation with the Prince, you think her biological father is Anakin Skywalker?”

“Who is now Darth Vader. I believe Organa’s daughter was conceived while Anakin was a Jedi Knight and not a Sith. In fact, I’m positive. When I saw her connection to Anakin he wasn’t stained with the darkside.”

Sacha nodded then looked up at me tentatively. “Jax…can you see my aura?”

I gave her a playful wink. “I usually don’t peek.”

She lowered her head and fiddled with her wineglass. “Would you be able to see if anything bad is going to happen to me?”

My stomach sunk. I know where she was going with this conversation. She wanted me to peer into her soul and examine her connections of the Force. She wanted to know her fate. The thing is, I didn’t want to know.

She put her drinking glass on a side table and turned to face me. “Read me,” she insisted.

“No…I don’t want to know.”

Her face fell. “You think something bad is going to happen to me, don’t you?”

I sat quietly knowing that was exactly it.

“Answer me Jax.”

I let out the breath I was holding. “Something bad happens to everyone I love.”

“Love?”

I closed my eyes regretting my choice in words. “I meant that as…friends. The people I care about. They have a tendency of dying on me.” I turned away not wanting to see the disappointment in her eyes.

“So you won’t look because you are afraid you will get a glimpse of my death?”

I nodded with a sigh.

“Jax…we have a decision to make concerning our future. The future of our group. We fear leading the Inquisitors to the Rangers. If you can look at our auras and get a glimpse of things to come then we can make a more informed decision.” She reached over and put a finger to my chin turning my head toward her. “Please look.”

My stomach clenched and my chest tightened, but I agreed. “Okay, but it will have to be fast. I don’t want anybody sensing my use of the Force.” I turned in my seat to face her fully and then immersed myself in the flow of the Force. I saw ribbons of energy surrounding Sacha that vibrated and changed from white to blue and yellow. These bands of energy swirled and reached out. I saw various people at the end of the ribbons. They were individuals I recognized, except they were older. Den had wrinkles around his eyes. I-Five had another new chassis, Norro was now a young man and Magash had a few gray hairs. I looked around and finally spotted a slightly older version of myself and…” I sucked in a sharp breath before breaking the connection.

“What is it Jax? What did you see? Did I die?” Sacha stared at me wide-eyed.

My mind was reeling, unsure of the accuracy of the vision. I have never seen such clear and concise connections to others before. Perhaps the strength of the vision has something to do with my involvement with the future I glimpsed.

I could feel Sacha's dread quicken with every second I remained silent. “What is it?” She raised her voice to a panic level. “I should never have asked. I’m going to die.” She looked up at me pleading. “At least tell me I went fast…that I didn’t suffer.”

“Sacha…” I hesitated enough to panic her further.

“Oh Gods, I’m going to have a painful death.” She covered her face with her hands as she shook her head in disbelief. She looked back up to me. “Did Vader get me?”

“No.”

“Am I eaten by a Rancor?”

“What? Why would you be eaten by a Rancor?”

“I don’t know. I’m just imagining bad deaths and I have a great imagination. So please just answer me!”

“Sacha, calm down. You didn’t die.” I put my arms around and held her tight.

“I know it can’t be good. It must have been a really bad future to get that type of reaction out of you.”

“It’s not bad…at least I don’t think you will see it that way. You may actually like what I saw…but then you might not. I’m not sure how you are going to react.”

Her eyes closed to narrow slits. “Are you going to tell me or am I going to have to dunk your head in the bidet until you talk?”

I couldn’t help but chuckle at the image that comment conjured up. “No need for that.” I tightened my embrace. “I’m sorry to scare you. The people connected in your future simply surprised me.” I took a deep breath and let it out. “It’s nothing bad. You’re fine. We’re all fine.”

She pulled away from me and slapped my shoulder angrily. “Don’t try to placate me. You reacted strongly. What got you so riled up if it wasn’t somebody dying? What was it?”

I rubbed my sweaty palms over my shorts and I noticed my one leg was bouncing up and down nervously.

“Jax, if nobody died, then what did happen?”

I gazed in her eyes and gave her a weak smile. “Somebody was born. I saw our son.”

Her jaw dropped. “What?”

“I saw a child connected to you…and to me.”

She sat very still, staring at me in disbelief. “Could it be another stray we adopted, like Norro?”

I shook my head. “I saw Norro, but the Force ribbon connecting all of us was a different color and not as…prominent. The young child I saw was our son.”

I sat there waiting for her response. She did confess that she was interested in me, but that is a far cry from realizing the father of your future child was sitting on the couch with her. I don’t even know how I felt about the subject.

She took a couple deep breaths letting them out slowly. “So…what do you think about this vision?”

“It is a surprise, but a happy surprise. We were older in the vision, all of us--Magash, Den, Norro, you, me. If the vision is accurate it indicates we survived for at least another decade. The boy was young…probably eight years old. ” I gave her a grin. “That’s good news.”

She made a face and I knew that wasn’t the answer she was looking for. “That’s great that we live. I wanted to know what you thought about us having a child together.”

“I don’t know,” I admitted. “Sacha, the vision is a shocking revelation. I honestly haven’t had time to process the information. I can tell you we looked very happy together…in the vision. All of us. We looked extremely happy in that future.”

“And how do you feel now?”

I took a couple ragged breaths. “Stunned…” I stopped and really thought about it. What did I feel? “Sacha, I don’t know what to say. This is a shock. And it may not actually come to pass. The future is always in motion.” I ran a frustrated hand through my hair. Sacha stared at me silently, her posture tense. I knew this had to be hard on her. I just revealed a possible future where we are together and have a child and she wanted to know if I embraced the idea of having a family or am I ready to hyperdrive my way out of her life. I rubbed my thumb against my temple where a headache was forming. “Just give me a minute to collect my thoughts.”

I know I was reluctant to move on after the death of Laranth, but to be honest, I didn’t want to live the life of a Jedi monk. I concentrated deeply, analyzing my emotions and thoughts. I loved being around Sacha. My soul always felt lighter in her presence. It was a sensation that I cherished, but steadfastly avoided out of respect for Laranth’s memory. But now…now the Force has shown me I could possibly have a life with this woman…if I wanted it…if she wanted it.

‘What do I do?’

I turned to Sacha whose anguished expression broke my heart. She thought I was rejecting her. I reached out and pulled her closer to me. “Sacha, I am very happy at the thought of us together.” I smiled brightly. Once I said the words I was surprised at how joyful I felt. “As I said, this future might not come to pass…but I liked what I saw. Maybe it’s time for me to move on.” I grinned. “See, I told you when the time came you'd be the first one to know.”

She gave a short nervous laugh. I looked into her eyes questioningly. “What do you think about the vision?”

Her face lit up. “It sounds wonderful.”

“Good.” I hesitated slightly before I leaned in and lowered my mouth gently to hers. She momentarily stiffened with surprise but soon melted into my arms. Sacha groaned in pleasure as she slowly slid her hand behind the nape of my neck and pulled me closer, deepening the kiss.

After a moment we pulled away from each other breathless. She averted her eyes shyly. “Sorry. I don’t want to rush things for you.”

I reached up and brushed a few wayward strands of hair away from her face. “You’re not…but perhaps we shouldn’t jump into a relationship based on a vision. That may not be the best foundation for a long-term relationship.”

She gave a nervous smile. “You’re probably right.” She stood and looked down at me fondly. “I’m going to bed.”

“I think I’ll sleep on the couch tonight.”

“You don’t trust me?” She gave a teasing smile.

“I don’t trust myself.”

She shrugged a delicate shoulder. “Good night, Jax.” She leaned down and brushed her lips against mine and I jumped when a crackle of pure Force energy passed between us. It felt like the floor dropped out from beneath me as an overwhelming surge of emotion and images flooded through my body pulling us together and intertwining our destinies. In that moment, I knew Sacha and she knew me…intimately. The last time I felt this type of Force connection was with Laranth.

Sacha’s face went slack with awe as her knees grew weak. I pulled her back down on the couch next to me before she collapsed. “Sacha, don’t worry…it’s the Force doing this.” I thought of the best way to explain what was happening. “It's a…”

I was going to tell her it was something the Jedi called a Force bonding, but I never got the words out. She wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled me close, capturing my lips in passionate kiss that prevented further conversation.

As I explored her mouth I could feel a string of invisible energy binding us tighter and tighter until I could no longer resist the will of the Force or the beautiful women in my arms. Passion transcended caution as I poured everything into the kiss. I could feel her hands slipping under my tunic and running up my back in a motion that sent ripples down my spine. “We shouldn’t be doing this,” I whispered, my voice deep and husky with desire.

“I don’t know how we can stop.” Her hands moved from my back to my chest. Her sensual touch broke down my last shred of resistance.

I knew she was right. We were now too far gone. I wrapped her up in my arms and lifted her from the couch before gazing down at her lovingly. “Are you sure about this?”

She pulled my head down to hers and answered with a lingering kiss. Through the Force I could feel her answer.

‘Yes.’

 

LOL at the statement "we shouldn't start a relationship based on a vision." Just struck me as very much an echo of L/M. But then, the force bonding thing happened, like with Luke/Mara. So hey. I just ggotta SQUEEEEEE!

 

About time.

 

Seconding the yays! The banter with Jax and Sacha is great as always -- loved her jump from Vader to rancors as possible means of her doom. And Jax's (understandably) being stupefied for a minute by that rather detailed and highly optimistic vision. After all that he's seen in the last couple of years, it must seem like a very tenuous thing. Had a good chuckle at their first reactions to the bond -- "Don't worry, it's just the Force doing something weird" vs. "Whoohoo!"

 

Thanks! I'm glad you liked that.

Sacha was thinking that. lol!

I can't believe it took me an entire year to get these two together. lol! Jax is probably shocked because his life is turning out so different than what he imagined as a youth. He expected to become a Jedi and never have a family. Now the Jedi are gone and he sees a future with him as a father. It is not a done deal for him though. The future is always in motion, but at least he has some hope.

Thanks everybody for reading and taking the time to review.

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Entry 49


I woke up the next morning feeling incredibly nervous and worried that we rushed things. I am a trained Jedi, I know what a Force bonding can do to people, how it can cause overwhelming emotions capable of influencing their judgment. When Laranth and I experienced a similar Force connection we both understood what was happening and we were able to make a conscious decision to enter a relationship. But with Sacha, I worry that the experience might have clouded her decision-making abilities. What if she woke up and felt differently than she did last night? A Force-bonding can be as mind-altering as spice. I’d hate to think I took advantage of her.

I sat up slowly in bed trying not to wake the woman lying next to me. I looked down at my unclothed body and quickly pulled a sheet over my lap. I don’t know why I was feeling modest now after the amazing night we shared, but I am. I looked over the edge of the bed and reached over to grab my underwear. The movement of pulling on my briefs woke Sacha. She rolled over in bed and looked momentary puzzled to see me sitting next to her. I guess it took a few seconds to remember what transpired last night. She blushed and pulled the sheets up to her chin protectively while giving me a nervous smile. “Hi.”

It was a very weak greeting considering everything that happened last night, but it succeeded in breaking the tension. I chuckled warmly. “Hi.”

She averted her eyes shyly. “I know, that sounds like were are a couple of secondary school kids waking up hung over and naked and not knowing what to say.”

“Yeah,” I whispered. “That’s understandable. After all, this is new for us.” A flash of uneasiness ran through me as I once again wondered if we consummated our relationship prematurely. “Maybe too new.”

She looked at me guardedly. “New is not bad. What’s wrong?”

“Do you think we did the right thing?” I asked. It was a fair question. Last night was special, but it shouldn’t have happened…at least not the way it did. We went from friends to lovers in a matter of minutes. Sacha and I never even dated. If this doesn’t work out I would have destroyed a wonderful friendship.

Her smile drooped when she saw the look on my face. “Jax…do you regret last night?” Her words came out in a broken whisper and I could feel her heartache through the Force.

“No. No. I just hope we didn’t rush things, that’s all. I don’t want to lose you as a friend.”

Her body visibly relaxed. “Worrying about it is not going to change the fact that we did what we did. We can’t alter the past. Our relationship has forever changed.”

“How do you feel about that?” I ventured. “The change of our relationship, that is.”

“I had a wonderful night. I want to continue on this path…unless you don’t want to.”

I reached out and stroked her cheek. “I…I want to be with you.”

“Good, because I want to be with you also.” She turned her head and kissed the palm of my hand. “Can you hold me? I feel safe in your arms.”

“Sure.” I pulled her into my embrace and then settled back down in the bed. I dragged the covers over us and held her tightly as I reached up and stroked her shoulder length black hair. “What do you want to tell the crew when they come to pick us up today?”

“I don’t see it as any of their business,” she murmured in my ear before nipping lightly on my earlobe. “They’ll figure it out eventually.”

I closed my eyes and relished the feel of her warm naked flesh against mine. “I’m sure everything will work out fine.”


Entry 50

We checked out of the hotel and took a taxi to the docking bay where our ship was be waiting. We wore common clothing having packed away all the fancy garments purchased for this mission. When we arrived to the docking bay I paid the driver and hauled our heavy bags out of the speeder. On the walk to the ship I could feel Sacha’s anxiety quicken. I glanced at her and smiled. “Just relax. It’s not like we have big letters on our foreheads proclaiming, ‘I had sex’.”

She laughed as she lowered her eyes. “I hope the crew doesn’t tease us too much.”

“Oh they will!” I said with a laugh. “That’s why I would rather not tell them right away. I want them to see us together and let them get used to the idea. If they aren’t shocked, then they might go easy on us.”

“Pssff.” Sacha blew out a breath letting me know she didn’t believe that for a second. “They’re going to tease me more than the time I saw your birthmark on your butt or you buying a gimp mask.”

“It was a rebreather,” I insisted.

“Sorry, your domination rebreather mask.”

I glared at her, but then broke into a smile. “The store clerk lied to me.”

“If you say so.”

The boarding ramp lowered as we approached the ship and Den walked down from its interior. When he observed our relaxed gait he smiled. “It doesn’t look like we need to do an emergency departure. Did everything go well?”

“It worked out better than I anticipated.” I hauled our luggage up the ramp and set the bags down in the storage bay. Den and Sacha followed close behind. “Lock her up and request departure clearance. There is no need to tempt fate.” I looked at Sacha and gave her a weak smile. So far so good.

It took about a half hour but we finally received permission to take off. Den and Magash were on the flight deck. Den had decided Magash should learn how to fly a spacecraft. He is big on everybody being cross-trained so if any of us are incapacitated another crewmember could take over their duties.

“You don’t have to strangle the steering yoke,” Den admonished Magash. “Your knuckles are turning white. Grasp it loosely.” Magash took a cleansing breath as she focused on lifting the ship off the bay floor and maneuver it thorough the massive docking bay doors.The ship wobbled but then straightened and flew smoothly out of the building and into blue skies of Alderaan. Den smiled widely. “You’re doing great.”

I left those two to fly the ship and went back to the galley where I found I-Five back in his Human Replicate Droid chassis. “You are favoring that droid body.”

I-Five’s lips curved into a smile. “I do favor it. It is easier to interact with others in this form. I have discovered that humans and near humans use facial gestures to augment their verbal communications. I am attempting to master the art of non-verbal communication.” Suddenly I-Five’s expression darkened as his eyebrows drew together in a scowl.

I stared back at him perplexed. “Are you mad at me for some reason?”

A wide smile crossed his face. “Excellent. That is my angry expression. I trust it was convincing.”

I had to laugh. “Yes…that was really good.”

I-Five and I talked as I made a meal for the crew. Sacha came into the galley a few times. Often our eyes lingered upon each other, but we said little. I didn’t trust myself to keep this secret safe. I was positive my voice would crack or I would stumble over my own words when addressing her.

As we ate Sacha and I discussed the mission with the rest of the crew. I did omit some key facts, like Leia Organa’s true identity. I decided the less people who knew, the better. I also omitted any information concerning the intimate encounter between me and Sacha.

I was so cocksure that I fooled everybody that I was surprised when I was accosted by I-Five and Den as we retired to our cabin for the night.

Den bounced on his bunk looking like and eager schoolboy. “I want details!”

I raised my brow in my best look of confusion. “Details about what?”

I-Five laughed upon seeing my expression. “That’s an awful rendering of surprised confusion. It should look more like this.” He then raised his eyebrows, widened his eyes and let his jaw drop. He held that pose for a few seconds before his expression turned to a cocky grin. “Please disclose the details of what happened between you and Sacha.”

I shook my head. “I don’t know what details you are talking about.”

Den chuckled. “You had to pretend you were a married couple, you stayed in a hotel room which I presume had only one bed, and you two were all alone. Don’t tell me that wasn’t awkward.”

“Or titillating,” I-Five offered.

“I’m sorry to disappoint you, but nothing happened.”

Den looked to I-Five who was scrutinizing me. “Is he telling the truth?”

I-Five shook his head. “He is being deceptive.”

“Ha! I knew it!”

I frowned at I-Five. “And how can you possibly know that?”

The human replicate droid leaned against the wall and crossed his arms across his chest. “Because I have known you long enough to determine a baseline reading when it comes to your bodily reactions to stress. My eyes are capable of not only sensing the visible light spectrum but also infrared. I can see heat changes in your body. Whenever you lie your face increases in temperature by a fraction of a degree. Your eyes also dilate and there is an increased production of perspiration in the area of your hands, temples and underarms.”

I refused to confirm or deny anything. “You believe what you want.” I went to my bunk and sat down and began removing my boots. My head flew up when I heard something that sounded like a woman screaming. “What was that?”

I went to stand but I-Five motioned for me to sit and then cocked his ear against the wall. “That was not a scream of distress. Although I am not one hundred percent certain I believe that was Magash giving out a very un-Dathomiri squeal of surprise.” He turned back to me and chuckled. “In fact I have never heard Magash make such a noise. Sacha must have told her something very interesting.”

I gave a dismissive shrug of my shoulder. “She probably just showed her some of the jewelry lent to us for the mission.”

Den let out a barking laugh. “I really can’t see Magash gushing over jewelry.” He glanced over to I-Five. “Do you?”

I-Five didn’t answer but instead pressed his ear to the wall as a wide grin spread across his face. “Sacha is telling Magash a very interesting story.”

I stood and tried to pull the droid away from the wall but he slapped my hands away with a laugh. “Magash is now asking about your sexual prowess.”

“Oh Gods.” Den rolled on his bunk clutching his side while laughing hysterically.

“She did not.” I protested. “Please I-Five, give the ladies their privacy.”

The droid listened for a few more seconds before he pushed away from the wall and walked across the room. On his artificial face was the perfect self-satisfied look of a person who knows a secret.

“What did Sacha say,” Den asked when he caught his breath.

“I’ll tell you later. I don’t want to destroy Jax’s sense of manhood.”

I know he was trying to bait me, but I was too angry to care. “She didn’t say anything derogatory about me…did she?”

I-Five shook his head. “I don’t want to evade their privacy…although those two women are very comfortable discussing very…” He gave a dramatic pause. “Intimate details to each other.”

“If they can have girl-talk, why can’t we have guy and droid talk?” Den grinned at me expectantly.

“No,” I said with a shake of my head. “What Sacha says to Magash is her business. I have nothing to say.”

“Well in that case,” I-Five returned to the wall separating our two cabins and pressed his ear to the wall. He then turned and raked his gaze up and down my body. “Sacha obviously does not have a firm grasp of measurements and dimensions.”

“That’s it!” I stood and walked out of the cabin. I went down to the flight deck and dropped down into the captain’s chair. About an hour later Sacha joined me. She sat in the co-pilots seat looking sheepish. “Magash got the information out of me.”

I sat quietly for a few minutes before I started to laugh. “She was alone with you for what…five minutes before you cracked?” I turned to her and smirked. “You better not be picked up by Inquisitors because you are terrible at keeping a secret.”

She gave a slight shrug of her shoulder. “I assume you told I-Five and Den.”

I shook my head. “No…I didn’t have to. I-Five has very sensitive hearing and picked up your entire conversation. I left the cabin, not wanting to know the details, but I’m sure Den has the whole story by now.”

Her jaw dropped. “He heard everything?”

“I don’t know, I think so.”

She put her hands over her face and groaned. “Are you sure his deactivation programing was altered to be non-responsive.”

I laughed. “Don’t joke about that.”

She closed her eyes and sighed before she stood, walked over to me and kissed me on the lips. “No need to hide it, if everybody knows.”

I grinned as I grabbed her around the hips and pulled her down on my lap. “No reason at all,” I whispered before bringing my lips to hers for a warm, lingering kiss

 

Loved the morning-after jitters and assurances and LOL I-5 continues to be incorrigible. Magash sure knows how to get the juicy secret told.

 

Thanks Nyota's Heart for taking the time to read and review. I am trying to finish this story so I can start thinking about next year's Dear Diary Challenge. I am thinking of doing another journal. These are just some quick entries from Jax and then hopefully I will have the exciting climax soon (at least I hope it is exciting).

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ENTRY 51

Norro was waiting for us when we arrived back to Toprawa. He ran up and gave Sacha a big hug. He turned to me and I sensed he wanted to greet me in the same manner, but wasn’t sure if I would tolerate it. I smiled widely and held out my arms. He came forward and gave me a quick embrace. I stepped back and gaped at how much he had changed in such a short time. “You’re gaining weight. You look good. How do you feel?”

“Great. I think that parasite is gone.” He chuckled before flexing his biceps. “I gained two kilos in the last week. The ear mites are gone and I’m starting to read small words.”

“That’s wonderful!” I gave Norro a pat on the shoulder before I threw a sidelong glance at Sacha. She was beaming like a proud parent and I couldn’t help but remember the vision and how this young man was obviously connected to all of us. Apparently my plan of adopting him out to a loving couple wasn’t going to happen…unless Sacha and I were that couple. I turned to my friends and grinned. “Sacha and I are going to see Aren and Degan and get a debriefing.”

“And then later on…another debriefing,” Den joked. Sacha shot him an angry glare and he quickly shut his mouth.

When we arrived to the Ranger leadership office we discovered a representative of the Alderaan rebels had already contacted them. That's good news for the Rangers and the Rebels. Degan and Aren said they were going to send out Ranger represenatives to various rebel groups to provide training. The Antarian Rangers have been a paramilitary group for six hundred years. They have the knowledge to train future rebels. I’m glad the Alderaan leadership realized what an incredible asset these men and women would be to their cause.

Now I only have to figure out what I should do in the future.

Entry 52

It’s been a couple weeks since our return from Alderaan. Sacha and I haven’t been trying to hide our relationship and I think everybody is now becoming accustomed to seeing us together. For a while, Norro appeared a little jealous of me. I preoccupied Sacha and that was time she might have spent with him. He wants a mother badly and it appears he has chosen her as his mother figure. I can’t blame him; she is a very caring and loving person. I decided we all needed to talk.

I invited Sacha and Norro over to my room. Sacha and I sat on my small couch and I brought a chair for Norro to sit in. It took him a few minutes to open up, but when he did, his thoughts began to flow freely.

It turns out he was scared Sacha and I would marry, have kids of our own, and leave him to fend for himself. “Norro, that’s not going to happen," I reassured him. "I would be extremely proud to have you as a son. In fact, I am more than willing to formalize the father-son relationship legally. I’m sure there is somebody here that can make that happen.”

Norro smiled widely. “I would love that.” He turned to Sacha and grinned. “Does that mean you’ll be my mother?”

Sacha smiled. “Of course.”

Norro looked to both of us. “Are you two getting married?”

That question caught me off guard. I hadn’t discussed marriage with Sacha and now wasn’t the time. “Norro, Sacha and I just started dating. Give me a chance to build my courage up to ask her.”

Sacha’s jaw dropped. It wasn’t exactly a proposal, but I wanted her to know I was thinking about it. Norro jumped up with a happy whoop. “I can’t wait to tell Geri!” He then ran off to talk to his teenage Rodian mech-tech friend.

When he left she looked at me shyly. “Was that a pre-proposal statement of intent?”

I slipped closer to her on the couch. “It can be, if that’s what you want.”

“If that’s what I want?” She made a face. “The Jedi Order didn’t teach you much about wooing women or being romantic, did they?”

I gave her a wounded look. “No, but I thought I was improvising fairly well.”

She chuckled. “That’s okay. This conversation is a bit premature…no matter what vision of the future you had.”

I wrapped my arms around her and leaned in for a kiss. “How about this?” I kissed her neck lightly. “Is this a bit premature?”

“No,” she said with a shake of her head. “I think that’s overdue.”


ENTRY 53

Aren and Degan wanted me to go off on more missions, so I did. I went to Kuat to make contact with an insurgent group last week and was nearly trapped and caught by Inquisitors. Each time I go on a mission it appears it takes less and less time for the Sith to find me. I don’t know how they are doing it. I have a feeling Darth Vader is involved. I believe he is actively searching for me. I’m the Jedi that slipped between his fingers and now it’s personal.

I have to leave. I have to get away from the Rangers and the rebellion. All I am is a human homing beacon for Vader. Unfortunately, every time I bring this up to Degan or Aren they talk me into staying. I have a bad feeling about this.

Entry 54

I volunteered to look for planets that could possibly act as rebel bases. I figure if I am not meeting up with rebels I am not putting them in danger. My team and I will reconnoiter isolated and sparsely populated worlds. I am also using this mission to see if I am being tracked somehow.

Entry 55

We left Toprawa today with a full crew. Even Norro came along under the pretense of learning how to fly a spacecraft. That is one reason, but I also want everybody together just in case we find a place to settle down. We can transmit any intelligence information to the Rangers and then disappear. I know I am acting just like Obi-Wan Kenobi—who I hold in low regard for running and hiding—but I have a family now…and it’s getting bigger.

Sacha is pregnant.

I think I fathered the child while on Alderaan. I am not sure how that happened. Don’t get me wrong, I know how children are conceived, but I am on male repress medication. I got a contraceptive implant when I started dating Laranth. It is supposed to work for three years. Sacha had told me she was on female repress meds also. The Antarian Rangers highly encourage their female agents to take the meds just in case they are captured and they are…well, lets just say, abused.

Upon discovering she was pregnant, Sacha was upset and nervous…not about having a child, but not knowing how I would react to the news.

We were aboard the Laranth when she came onto the flight deck and asked to speak to me alone. She pulled me into the cabin we now shared with an alarmed look on her face. “Sacha what is it,” I remember asking. She closed the cabin door behind us as she took my hand in hers. “Jax…I need you to see if I’m right about something.”

I was perplexed. “Sure, what?”

She guided my hand to her belly. “Do you sense another presence in the Force?” Her breathing became rapid. “Am I pregnant?”

“Ohhh,” the word escaped me before I was aware I even said it. I wasn’t upset. I was shocked. I slowly dropped to my knees until I was kneeling before her. I pressed my trembling hand against her abdomen and then closed my eyes and reached out with the Force. I felt something reach out to me. It was a strong male presence. A wide grin split my face as I gazed up at Sacha. “Yes!” I quickly stood and pulled her into my arms. “This is amazing.”

“You’re happy?” I could hear the relief in her voice.

I pulled back to gaze into her gray eyes. “Of course I’m happy. I love you!” I dropped back down to my knees and kissed her belly. “And I love our baby.”

I don’t think I have ever been this happy in my life.

 

Ooh, I think Jax stopped working overtly with the Rangers just in time. Happy about Norro and Sacha's "news." Tickled by the pre-proposal statement of intent.

 

Ooh. Yay!

 

Great updates. Love to see them all together and happy

 

Well, that's some news. Hmm, Jax's concerns about being tracked are especially worrisome in this light. Really sweet conversations between him and Sacha. I especially liked this scene:

 

Thanks! I'm glad you liked it. With both of them on repress meds I have a feeling the baby is the will of the Force.

Thanks!

I love happy endings also. The EU was bad at doing that. Only Jaina and Jag's wedding was a little upbeat and that consisted of only a few sentences.

Thanks. Jax doesn't have much experience with women. Laranth was his only other love and she was a bit hardened by her experiences. She also didn't have a classic childhood which I assume Sacha had. I don't think there is much known about her other than she was a pod racer who lost an eye in an accident. I think Sacha is going to cut poor Jax some slack when it comes to romance.

I think I have at one or two more posts and I will be done. I am going away from Christmas with family so I need to get moving on this. Thanks everybody for reading.
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Entry 56

We entered the Colavas system to scout the planet Danuta. We thought it was a good prospect because the planet only had a handful of colonies consisting of mainly miners and farmers. When we came out of hyperspace all looked normal. We landed the Laranth near the capital city of Trid. That’s when we heard about an Imperial Garrison located on the outskirts of the city. I immediately crossed this planet off my list of possible locations for a rebel base. We quickly returned to our ship and prepared to take off when things started to go bad. An Imperial-class Star Destroyer appeared in orbit above the planet.

I was on the flight deck with Den and Magash. Both turned to me. “What do we do now?”

I felt a twist in my gut as an impending sense of doom swept over me. I knew they had to be here for me. Why else would a ship that massive be orbiting this Force-forsaken planet? The Imperial Garrison was reportedly tiny…probably a hundred men. A Star Destroyer had a crew of over forty thousand. It was doubtful they would come all this way to drop off supplies or garrison replacements when a small shuttle or frigate would suffice.

“If they know we’re here, we won’t be able to slip past that ship. We can only hope that they are just passing by, perhaps checking on the garrison, and will leave soon enough.” I really hoped what I said was true. This planet is so thinly populated I don't know where we could hide if we had to abandon the ship and flee.

Unfortunately, the Star Destroyer wasn't passing by and it didn't leave promptly. Transport shuttles and freighters exited the Destroyer and descended to the planet’s surface to land at the garrison. This went on for the remainder of the day and until the next morning. It was was nerve-wracking having to watch a steady stream on Imperial shuttles coming and going, but it did give me some comfort. They were obviously not on a Jedi hunt. I finally decided to check out what was going on. If the Imperials were developing a larger base on Danuta the Rangers would be interested in knowing more about it.

I wanted to go alone but my crew adamantly protested that plan. They all wanted to go. I tried to convince Sacha to stay on the ship with Norro, but she refused. Magash was just as stubborn. Eventually I agreed to take my two Jedi apprentices. I left Norro with Den and I-Five as the rest of us donned nondescript overalls with blasters and lightsabers concealed in specially made interior jacket pockets.

We hired a cab to bring us to the outskirts of town and then moved in by foot. I had some macrobinoculars and a holoimager with me. We hiked up a hill overlooking the garrison. All three of us crawled the last few meters until we were lying on the top of the hill trying to minimize our silhouette. We observed the comings and goings of the Imperials for about an hour. It’s obvious they plan to expand their local garrison. Almost all of the freighter shuttles were filled with construction equipment and building supplies. I was about to call off the recon and go back to the ship when Sacha requested the Macrobinoculars. She peered through the device for a long moment before she handed the field glasses back to me. “Check out the rank of that gaunt looking officer talking to that group of civilians down there.”

I put the glasses to my eyes and tried to make out the front rank insignia plaque. “That’s a lot of colorful squares on his uniform. Six blue squares on the top and three red and three yellow on the bottom. He also has code cylinders on both side of his uniform.” I looked up from the macrobinoculars. “That’s an extremely high ranking official. I know an admiral has twelve blocks, but they are usually a row of blue and a red row underneath. I think his rank indicates a Sector High Commander.”

“You mean a Moff?” Sacha asked.

“Most likely.”

“So that begs the question, why is a Moff overseeing the enlargement of an Imperial Garrison on some desolate planet?” Sacha turned to me for an answer.

“Obviously this location is going to be more than a simple garrison. It could become a training center, a research facility or a weapons plant. Or maybe they’re going to build a spaceport and use the planet as an operational base. There are a number of reasons to have a Moff on site and none of them are good for the Rebels.”

Magash grabbed the macrobinoculrs out of my hand and put them to her eyes. “Should we try to get a closer look? There are many civilian workers. Perhaps we can blend in.”

A year ago I would have gladly run headfirst into the fray, but now I have a baby to worry about. “No. We’ll take some imager vids from this location and then go back to the ship. If civilian traffic has been moving unimpeded it’s possible we can get off this rock. If there has been a shutdown of flights we may have to wait until the Star Destroyer finishes its delivery and goes away.” I pulled an imager out of my pocket and started to record the activity below. I tried to get a tight close-up of our unknown Moff, but at that magnification the images were blurry. After a few minutes of recording we backed down from the ridge and moved away from the Imperial base. When we got to the edge of town we boarded a public transit speeder and traveled back to the docking bay. As I marched up the boarding ramp of our ship I called out to Den. “How’s the traffic in-and-out of here?”

Den popped his head out of the flight deck. “It appears normal. I talked to some of the mechanics around here and they said this is the first time a Star Destroyer was in orbit, but they have had a steady stream of freighters dumping their cargo with the imperials for the last few weeks.”

“Will our counterfeit transponder pass Imperial scrutiny?” Sacha asked.

“I think it will, but maybe we should lay low for a while and wait for them to leave.”

“No, get clearance to leave. Usually the first thing the Imperials do when taking over a planet is lock down the spaceports and begin searches of incoming and outgoing ships.”

“You got it Jax.” Den motioned for Magash to join him. “Come on, I’ll teach you how to put in departure requests.”

I went to our first aid kit and pulled out a bottle of antacids. My stomach was starting to burn from the stress. I hope we can get out of here soon.

Entry 57

We took off about an hour later. Our designated departure route took us closer to the Star Destroyer than I was comfortable with. “Let’s make a few short jumps before heading back to Toprawa,” I said to Den and Magash. “Just in case somebody tries to follow us.”

Den nodded. “I already thought of that. The first jump is already programmed in. We just need to get out of the gravity well of the planet and put a little more distance between us and that Star Destroyer.”

I stared out the cockpit viewports and gazed at the immense ship in awe. It is hard to imagine forty thousand crew members on one ship. Suddenly a dark sensation began to creep down my spine. Something evil was on that ship. “Let’s hurry up. There may be an Inquisitor onboard.”

Magash looked at the ship readouts. “We are less than a minute away from the proper running speed and distance from the planet.”

Sacha came onto the flight deck and put a hand on my shoulder. “Do you feel that Jax?”

I nodded nervously. “It’s probably an Inquisitor.”

Sacha gazed at the immense ship for a long moment before she shook her head. “That presence feels familiar. Doesn’t it?”

I concentrated and suddenly things became very clear. I turned to Den and screamed, “Get us out of here! Vader’s on that ship!”

Den turned to Magash, “Hit it!”

She pulled back on the hyperdrive controls and the pinpoint stars stretched into long lines. Thoughts leapt feverishly through my head. “I can’t go back to Toprawa…ever. If I sensed Vader, he sensed me. He will have a long range fighter tracking us.” I walked up to the onboard navigation station. “We need to find a planet with a spaceport. I want to split up and rendezvous when we're sure Vader isn’t following me. If he has a choice of hunting me down or my team…he’ll go after me.”

“We won’t leave your side,” Den said firmly.

I felt like pulling my hair out right about now. My friends are the most stubborn group of people I have ever met. I leaned over Magash’s shoulder. “Magash, do you think your clan would hide us? With the witches being Force sensitive I would think it would be difficult to sense a Jedi there.”

She nodded. “They will for at least a short time.”

My breathing became rapid as perspiration formed on my brow. "Good." I turned back to Den. “Find us a planet with a spaceport with shuttle service. Drop me off and then go to Dathomir. I’ll try to draw Vader away from you. If I can elude Vader I'll rendezvous with you back on Dathomir.”

“Jax, we’re not going…” Den started.

I put up a hand cutting him off. “Just get us to a planet with a spaceport and then we’ll argue about who is going with who!”

Den frowned before turning away to search the navigation computer for a suitable planet.
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Author Notes: Danuta is from the EU. If you look it up on Wookieepedia you will discover the intended use of that base.

 

How nerve-wracking. I was on the edge of my seat wondering if they'd be discovered ... hoping whatever they were up to didn't have to do with Jax personally. Does sound like splitting up and meeting up later is the best strategy.

 

Wow, that was intense! Hope it all turns out okay...