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Beyond - Legends The Keeper of Memories~ "Dear Diary chlg," (OCs, L/M ) ~*~ Complete

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by divapilot, Jan 4, 2007.

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  1. divapilot

    divapilot Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 30, 2005
    Title: The Keeper of Memories: The Journal of Alida Maritin
    Author: Divapilot
    Characters: OCs (Alida and Bruno Maritin), L/M, H/L
    Time frame: TTT
    Summary: A Twi'lek restauranteur's life intersects with a Jedi master's.
    Author?s Notes: Written for the [link=http://boards.theforce.net/fan_fiction_resource/b10304/25809540/p1/?96]Dear Diary 2007 Challenge[/link]: "The premise is to write diary entries from the point of view of one character, preferably an OC. You don't have to write every day, although you could write as often as you want. A minimum of two (maybe one a month) would be okay. Sure, your POV character should be an OC, but you can use as many canon characters as you want in the supporting cast."

    The character of Alida comes from [link=http://boards.theforce.net/beyond_the_saga/b10477/24674306/p1/?12]An Alliance at Alida?s.[/link]



    Today is the anniversary of the day that I first took over this restaurant.

    Whenever this day comes around, I remember my father. He was a gentle man, a kind man. He was not particularly handsome, but he loved me and my sister very much and he loved our mother, too, I suppose, in his own way.

    Does it take a lifetime to forget? So far, everything seems to stay clear and distinct. I remember his funeral, the way that I heralded my father to his final clan home. I took the tasseled banner that bore my father?s name and clan symbols, traced the silky fabric for the final time, then folded it in the proper manner to indicate a departed soul before placing the banner in the engraved memory box. I handed the memory box to my mother. She rested her hand on it, closed her eyes, then hesitated for just a moment before returning it to me, the first-born. Now it belonged to me: now I am the memory keeper for our family.

    I hope my father approves of what I have done with his life?s work. I guess most people wouldn?t consider this small restaurant to be much of a legacy. It?s just four walls, some windows, a scattering of furniture, lots of expenses and far too much time expended. But I don?t see that. I see my father?s hand in every decision here. He chose the wood for the bar. He selected the lighting fixtures.

    It was my father?s choice to locate the restaurant here near the central governmental section of Coruscant, near what used to be Imperial City but far enough removed from the inner courts and chamber houses. It was a wise decision; many of his clients were important government officials who craved private, reclusive evenings as opposed to those weaklings who wanted fame and celebrity. Even in the days of the Emperor, his restaurant maintained a steady and reliable business.

    My dear husband Bruno knows that my father?s deathday is a difficult time for me. He sent me some lovely Ryloth desert blossoms this afternoon. He is a good man and I am lucky to have found him. I think I will save some of the roast ducash with granalla stuffing that I made earlier and bring it home for supper. He loves that particular meal.

    According to my clan?s traditions, my father?s deathday marks the start of my family year. I wonder what changes this year will bring. Last night, as I always do on the eve of a new year, I recited an intention and made an offering to my father?s memory and to The Guardian of Ryloth for good fortune this year. In previous years, I would make an intention for a child to love. I know that Bruno and I cannot have children of our own, but I always thought that maybe The Guardian might send us someone to adopt and love. I think I am too old for that intention now. That?s why last night?s intention was simply that this year be kind to two old married people.

    I think The Guardian, Aaylas'ecura, may have heard me. For the first time in years I feel a sense of excitement as the new year begins. I cannot deny that feeling that something is coming.

    Something or someone extraordinary is about to enter our lives. I am ready.




    [color=silver]edited for accuracy and clarity[/color]>
     
  2. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Game Host Who Loves Fanfics & RPGs star 7 VIP - Game Host

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Divapilot!!! [:D] [:D]

    Beautiful and moving. :)
    I know who the OC is. [face_dancing] For those readers who are reading about her for the first time, I won't spill it, just mention that her first name begins with A. [face_laugh] [face_dancing]
    Please PM with updates? I'm so gonna love this! :)
     
  3. verybusy

    verybusy Jedi Knight star 2

    Registered:
    Sep 18, 2006
    :)

    I think I am going to like following your OC through the next year.... ;) can I have a PM as well when you update.

    cheers,

    VeryBusy
     
  4. ginchy

    ginchy Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 25, 2005
    Oh! I love it already! Great job on adding in touches of her culture--I love reading her thoughts! Can't wait for more. You've created two awesome OCs here! :D

     
  5. Blue_Milkshake

    Blue_Milkshake Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Nov 18, 2005
    I cannot tell you how awesome this is!!! Yay!

    My dear husband Bruno knows that my father?s deathday is a difficult time for me. He sent me some lovely Ryoth desert blossoms this afternoon. He is a good man and I am lucky to have found him. I think I will save some of the roast ducash with granalla stuffing that I made earlier and bring it home for supper. He loves that particular meal.

    *melts* They are soooooo wonderful together. @};-
     
  6. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2004
    I love the depth you've already given to this character!

    Love it! =D=

    According to my clan?s traditions, my father?s deathday marks the start of my family year. I wonder what changes this year will bring. Last night, as I always do on the eve of a new year, I recited an intention and made an offering to my father?s memory and to The Guardian of Ryoth for good fortune this year. In previous years, I would make an intention for a child to love. I know that Bruno and I cannot have children of our own, but I always thought that maybe The Guardian might send us someone to adopt and love. I think I am too old for that intention now. That?s why last night?s intention was simply that this year be kind to two old married people.

    I think The Guardian, Aayla Secura, may have heard me. For the first time in years I feel a sense of excitement as the new year begins. I cannot deny that feeling that something is coming.

    Something or someone extraordinary is about to enter our lives. I am ready.



    Gorgeous. =D=
     
  7. Jade_Pilot

    Jade_Pilot Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 10, 2005
    Wonderful! I love the cultural insights and the depth of characterization with your response. I'm looking forward to learning more about Alida.

    Bravo sister-pilot! =D=
     
  8. MirandaFair

    MirandaFair Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 13, 2005
    Always glad to see something new by you up and running, Lady Diva! [:D] Exciting start to Alida's journey for the new year. With turning our calendars to 2007, I can relate to her anticipation of great things to come. However, I'm jealous that the presence of a certain Jedi will be finding his way into changing her life. Ah well, thank goodness for fanfiction. [face_mischief]

    I agree with the posts above! :) The way you introduce us to Alida's Twi'lek heritage is done at great ease. It's not lost in exposition and is beautifully done. I can tell this is going to be a lovely and sentimental piece.

    Looking forward to it! @};-
     
  9. DancesWithBlasters

    DancesWithBlasters Jedi Knight star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 22, 2006
    I happened to click on your link by chance, and because I was hooked by your title, not realizing it was on the Beyond boards. Knowing only a minimal amount about the EU, I tend to avoid the Beyond boards because frankly, they confuse me. Jaina, Jacen, Anakin and Mara I know and can follow, up to a point anyway, but new species like the Yuhuzn Vong (I know I spelled that wrong) make my head spin. But this story was worth the visit. I know already I'm going to love this. Your character is easy to connect to, and seems like she could be somone I might meet, and this story has an embracing feeling. Count me in!
     
  10. Jedi Trace

    Jedi Trace SouthEast RSA star 6 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Dec 15, 1999
    This is fantastic, diva! :D I adore Alida and Bruno and can't even tell you how happy I am to see more of them in depth! [face_dancing]

    Love the reference to "Aaylas'ecura." :cool:

    And the premonition of something great coming into her life....*shivers*

    :D:D:D



     
  11. divapilot

    divapilot Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 30, 2005
    Jade_Eyes: Thank you! Yes, it?s Alida. I hope you enjoy reading a little more about her. She has some interesting observations about the romance between Luke and Mara.

    Verybusy: Thanks! Let?s hope that I make it through the year! I think there will be enough to talk about, though.

    Ginchy: Thank you, Ginchy! Yes, I am devouring every detail I can get on Twi?leks in order to make her seem real. Then I have to invent the other 90%. Hey, I?ll chalk it up to regional differences. Ryloth?s a big planet.

    Blue_Milkshake: Thank you for the encouragement! I like Alida and Bruno. Their romance is pretty special. Of course, they have interesting friends who show up, too.

    VaderLvr64: Thank you very much! It?s good that Alida comes across as a real character with depth. It?s a bit of a challenge writing from the POV of a non-human, though.

    Jade_Pilot: Thank you! There is a lot more background information on Alida, her marriage, her history and her family. Hopefully it will stay interesting enough for the ride!

    MirandaFair: Hello! Thanks for your glowing response! I?m hoping that this character, Alida, will fill out well through this journal. Thank you for the compliments!

    DancesWithBlasters: First of all, cool username! Secondly, thank you so much for your kind reply. I?m honored that I was able to coax you into venturing into Beyond. Hope you enjoy the rest of this as well.

    Jedi Trace: Thank you! Bruno and Alida have many interesting things to say. I?m glad you like them enough to stop in to hear more.
     
  12. divapilot

    divapilot Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 30, 2005
    Entry2.

    Another busy week at the restaurant, which is a good thing since living on Coruscant is expensive, and the closer you are to a governmental center, the pricier it gets. It?s tough competition when there are so many trendy new places opening up. Just a few weeks ago a new Rodian establishment opened, and they have been soliciting business like mad! I noticed that they catered a state dinner. Of course, they couldn?t advertise directly, but their chef is making quite a little celebrity of himself and he was sticking his bumpy green face in every picture. You could almost hear it. ?Look! There?s Chef Turget with the famous Han Solo! Look at him shaking hands with General Antilles!?

    Pah. My restaurant is just as good as anyone else?s, and we have been in business longer.

    Bruno says that I worry over nothing. He tells me that our restaurant has class, and that?s something those Holo-parasites will never have. So go ahead, Chef Turget. Maybe your fancy restaurant will have some new customers, but when they get bored with chilled agurio fish or that nasty-smelling char-burned goa cheese, they will move on to the next trend of the moment. And you will be standing in an empty restaurant!

    Tomorrow night is our busiest night. I checked the reservations list and was relieved to see that it was filled. Bruno said, ?Of course it?s filled. Everyone knows that Alida?s is the best restaurant in the sector.? Then he snuck up behind me, kissed my cheek, and he tickled my lek just behind my ear. (He thinks it?s cute the way that makes my head tails curl.) I slapped his hand and told him to behave himself. He is such a tease. Maybe I do worry too much. It?s a good thing I have my Bruno to help me relax.

    One reservation was interesting. It was for two people, under the name ?Luke Lars,? but it wasn?t the name but the com number it came in under that caught my eye. You see, I have a very good deep memory for numbers. When I was very young and just starting in my father?s restaurant, I used to monitor the reservations file. I remember that coms placed from the palace had a different tracking number than outside coms, due to the security. Now, I have never heard of Mr. Lars, but I know that com was placed from the former palace apartments. He is probably someone who works for the Solos. Maybe he is trying to impress a lady friend. I?ll bet he thinks that because he works for such a prestigious family that he has to puff himself up like some kind of preening bird. She is probably some little wide-eyed thing, fresh from the off-world transports, looking for a friend in the big cities.

    I remember what it was like to be a young girl on her own. When Mother sent me to live with Father, I had to make a very long journey from Ryloth to Coruscant. I remember how scared I was. All I had was my suitcase, some credits, and Father?s address.

    All the way to our connection in Obroa-Skai, this horrid man kept bothering me. (Why is it that these men think that just because I am a Twi?lek, that means that I want to become familiar with them? I cannot help the way that I look, and I cannot help that my skin is sensitive and standard clothing irritates me.) Anyway, this horrible man would not stop. He followed me when I got off the transport and tried to drag me into an empty alcove when I was in the terminal. Everyone ignored my shouts for help. It was in the dark days of the Empire, and there was so much trafficking in Twi?lek slaves back then that people probably thought he owned me.

    Then, when I was sure that all was lost, the man was suddenly yanked away from me. There stood between us another human man. I will never forget his words. He said, ?Get your hands off that lady!?

    When my attacker tried to hit him, my rescuer threw his hot drink in the man?s face, then he grabbed my suitcase with one hand and my hand in the other, and we ran away together. I was so upset that I didn?t know what to do. When I finally calmed down, I had missed my connecting transport to Coruscant. He offered to get me a room for
     
  13. Star_Angel

    Star_Angel Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 18, 2006
    Oh, I love this.

    I do know who the characters are I think I do anyway.

    I think Mr. Lars would think twice about being trying to take advantage of an innocent girl again after Bruno rolls up his sleeves and teaches this brash charmer a lesson in the proper way to treat a lady.

    To be honest I think that he would *lol*

    Please add me to the pm list. Thanks.
     
  14. MirandaFair

    MirandaFair Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 13, 2005
    Squeee!!!

    :D

    Okay. Now that I got that out of my system...here goes! Alida's storytelling of how she came to be on Coruscant was both scary and sincere. Good thing she had the handsome Bruno there to protect her. I love the protection she feels towards making sure Mr. Lars doesn't take advantage of the other guest. It makes me wonder what's coming up? [face_thinking]

    I love Alida's personality. It just shines through the whole post. This section shows a lot of her "umph":

    Bruno says that I worry over nothing. He tells me that our restaurant has class, and that?s something those Holo-parasites will never have. So go ahead, Chef Turget. Maybe your fancy restaurant will have some new customers, but when they get bored with chilled agurio fish or that nasty-smelling char-burned goa cheese, they will move on to the next trend of the moment. And you will be standing in an empty restaurant!

    [face_laugh]

    And this part had me literally laughing out loud!

    (Why is it that these men think that just because I am a Twi?lek, that means that I want to become familiar with them? I cannot help the way that I look, and I cannot help that my skin is sensitive and standard clothing irritates me.)

    What a dilemma! A quote comes to mind. "If only I were rich instead of beautiful."

    Oh, I hear you, Alida. I have that problem all the time. ;)

    Wonderful work, as always. Can't wait for more. And I thought I asked in the last reply but I didn't. Could I receive PM updates? Thank you. [face_batting]
     
  15. DancesWithBlasters

    DancesWithBlasters Jedi Knight star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 22, 2006
    Thank you for the compliment! I stole my user name from the novel Dances With Wolves. Being a dancer, (though not professionally, thank God, can you imagine that?) it made me happy. Anyway, this story is so worth braving the Beyond boards. I am seriously in love with your characters. How awesome are they? Thanks for the PM; this just about made my day. Seriously.
     
  16. RebelMom

    RebelMom Jedi Knight star 6

    Registered:
    Apr 20, 2000
    I really like your OCs. I'm following the other story as well and enjoy her over there as well.
     
  17. SilSolo

    SilSolo Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Mar 5, 2004
    I like themention of Aayla and the fact that you're writing from an alien's perspective.
     
  18. ginchy

    ginchy Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 25, 2005
    Great update, lady!!

    You could almost hear it. ?Look! There?s Chef Turget with the famous Han Solo! Look at him shaking hands with General Antilles!?

    hee, but Alida's will have Luke Lars! :p

    I really love how Alida and Bruno met... how he treated her as a lady, instead of an object. Reminds me of Luke treating Mara as a whole person, not just an Imperial remnant.

    As always, can't wait for more!! :D
     
  19. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Game Host Who Loves Fanfics & RPGs star 7 VIP - Game Host

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Thanks for the PM. :D

    Bruno showed up just in time, didn't he? :) How ... chivalrous of him. :) I don't mean that flippantly; he's got a heart of gold and probably sensed Alida's plight and sweetness. :D

    Loved this bit:
    I know what it feels like to be young and vulnerable in a big city. If this Luke Lars intends to take advantage of his guest, Bruno and I will be the first
    ones to step in to protect her. I think Mr. Lars would think twice about trying to take advantage of an innocent girl again after Bruno rolls up his sleeves
    and teaches this brash charmer a lesson in the proper way to treat a lady.

    Hee!!! [face_laugh]
    =D=
    Yup, I'm definitely loving this! [face_dancing]
     
  20. MsLanna

    MsLanna Jedi Master star 6

    Registered:
    Jul 8, 2005
    Oooo, I like this.
    Let's see how Mr. Lars get's his butt kicked:p

    But I wonder whom he will bring along. [face_thinking]
     
  21. divapilot

    divapilot Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 30, 2005
    Star_Angel: Thank you! Alida is a little mistaken about who Mr. Lars is. There will be no confrontation tonight. But there will be a new chapter beginning in Alida and Bruno?s life! And I would be happy to send you a PM.O:)


    MirandaFair: Thank you, thank you! So glad you liked it. I?ve added you to the PM list.

    I love Alida's personality. It just shines through the whole post.
    Thanks! She has a very strong characterization

    "If only I were rich instead of beautiful."
    True! She?s a true Twi?lek, assuming that being sexy and beautiful is just the way it is. Can?t say I?ve ever had to worry about that very much. [face_laugh]


    DancesWithBlasters: I am seriously in love with your characters. How awesome are they? Thank you so much! I am pretty partial to them (I better be ? I?m signed up for a year tour here)! More to come.:D


    RebelMom: Thank you! I?m happy you like them. As a certified hopeless romantic, I?m glad you like this story and the original. I hope I got your seal of approval![face_love]


    SilSolo: I like them ention of Aayla and the fact that you're writing from an alien's perspective. Thank you! I?m trying to stay true to her culture, although a lot of it is invented. And as for writing from an alien?s perspective, as far as Alida would say, she?s the real deal and the 6 billion human on Coruscant are the aliens. [face_alien_1]


    Ginchy: I really love how Alida and Bruno met... how he treated her as a lady, instead of an object. Reminds me of Luke treating Mara as a whole person, not just an Imperial remnant. Thank you, my friend. I?m glad you made that connection ? it?s how they can relate to Luke and Mara, and how they can help them out. Alida and Bruno have been there, done that. ;)


    Jade_Eyes: Thank you! I hope this is meeting your SQUEE factor. Yes, there will be more L/M to come! :D


    Ms. Lanna: Thank you for stopping in! Mr. Lars is not what Alida thinks he is. But a lot of people are not what you assume they are, isn?t that true? Glad you enjoyed it.:)
     
  22. furrylittlebantha

    furrylittlebantha Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Dec 2, 2005
    This rocks! I love how you can make this OC so real by sketching the details of her day-to-day life, and weave in backstory without it sounding contrived. Having worked in a restaurant, reading the parts about the business were especially interesting. Awww, Bruno saved her! How refreshing to find chivalry in a world where chivalry is mainly delegated to Jedi.;) Speaking of which, I can't wait to see her down-to-earth, nail-on-the-head opinions on the ensuing L/Mness!
     
  23. divapilot

    divapilot Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 30, 2005
    furrylittlebantha: Hi Furry! Thank you! Alida will explain a little more later, but as the memory keeper, she will swing between reflecting on current events and past memories often. Glad you like this.[face_dancing]


    Entry 3.

    Today was an interesting day. Remember when I said I felt that The Guardian, Aaylas?ecura, was sending us something or someone significant? Well, that someone walked straight through the main door, right past me, and I didn?t even recognize him. (Apparently, The Guardian has a trickster?s sense of humor.)

    There was an odd buzz in the main dining room tonight, such as we sometimes hear when a celebrity visits. I scanned the room, but I recognized no one. Then I spotted a vaguely familiar human man at the far table. He was sitting with a human woman.

    Since I did not have the night?s reservation file handy, I asked Bruno who he was. (I am ashamed to admit it, but even after living on Coruscant these twenty-odd years, humans tend to all look alike to me.) Bruno, of course, knew who he was. ?That?s Skywalker, the war hero.?

    I had seen Luke Skywalker?s holo probably a hundred times before, but I had never really looked at it. Now, here he was, Jedi master and trusted advisor to the highest level of government, at Alida?s Restaurant. I was delighted! Then Bruno ruined my mood by suggesting that being such a person of high rank, it was a bit surprising to see him here, since most of those types of people frequent more exclusive establishments.

    That got me angry. What right did this Master Skywalker have to look down upon our restaurant? ?[i]Surprising[/i] to see him here?? The more I thought about it, the more irritated I became. I frowned and flicked my lekku testily. ?Ali, that?s not a nice word,? Bruno warned.

    Was Alida?s Restaurant simply an acceptable second where he could go to avoid the press, instead of dining at some better, fancier establishment? Oh, now that did it. My [i]name[/i] is on this restaurant. Nobody insults my name. Nobody.

    Bruno seemed to read my thoughts. ?Ali!? he warned again. He grabbed for my arm but I slipped past him.

    I calmed down a bit before I reached the table, probably because I realized that I didn?t want to lose a customer due to my poor manners. I was not raised that way, you understand. When I reached his table, there was something very soothing about the way Master Skywalker talked to me that almost made me forget why I was there.

    Almost.

    He assured me, as did his lady friend, that they were quite happy with the evening, and in fact, they liked the atmosphere here very much. That got me to thinking. My father taught me to take opportunities as the winds blow them to you, so I suggested that if they liked the privacy that we could offer, then we would be honored to create a special room just for them. Few establishments can make that offer. Since our restaurant is older, we are bigger than the new restaurants that pay premium credits for every square unit of floor space. There was a half-empty storage area that we were planning to renovate anyway. We could easily expand a little into the main area, bump a bit into my office, and there you are: a private dining area.

    Before Master Skywalker knew it, he had agreed to come back and dine with us again. I could see Bruno approaching, laughter in his eyes, and I used the opportunity to offer Bruno?s services as a body guard should any sludge reporters attempt to bother Master Skywalker and his lady friend, Mara Jade. (I think she was amused by the whole conversation.)

    We left them to finish their meal, but I got the reservation for their next dinner. Now Alida?s Restaurant is the favored dining establishment of Jedi Master Luke Skywalker. I must find out what foods he likes. I have a friend who works in the food services offices over at the old palace apartments. If he ever requests deliveries to his apartment, I can find out from her what he prefers and we?ll keep it in stock. What if he recommends us to his friends? We will have even more clients! And even if no>
     
  24. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Game Host Who Loves Fanfics & RPGs star 7 VIP - Game Host

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Thanks oodles for the PM.

    Alida's reminiscences about the class ... [face_laugh] [face_laugh] I bet she really distracted the prof! [face_laugh]

    I really like how the present flows so naturally into the past. It's not jarring at all. ;) You just feel like you're having a conversation with someone very interesting and friendly. :)
     
  25. ginchy

    ginchy Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 25, 2005
    [face_laugh] [face_laugh]

    Between you and Jade_Pilot, I'm just laughing all the time now. LOVE Alida!! She is wonderful. Her asides are terrific (especially about college), and I love the unfolding love-story between her and Bruno.

    I always love your fics, lady!! =D=
     
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