main
side
curve
  1. Welcome to the new boards! Details here!

Beyond - Legends The Keeper of Memories~ "Dear Diary chlg," (OCs, L/M ) ~*~ Complete

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by divapilot, Jan 4, 2007.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. ginchy

    ginchy Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 25, 2005
    *steals*

    hee, hee... you should let me dictate your posting schedule more often, lady! ;)

    GREAT update! Tisa is going to be very happy, but Alida... this is not for her. Maybe she has her first real inklings now??

    Bontran raised a hand to stop me. ?Alida! Enough! We will not speak of this again. I have allowed you to continue this obsession in private. Do not argue with me.?

    Outloud I said, "Ooooohhh..." Yeah, cause I can just see what would happen should my husband say that to me (or I to him!). LOL And it ain't perty. [face_laugh]

    Wonderful update, cannot wait for more! =D=
     
  2. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Game Host Who Loves Fanfics & RPGs star 7 VIP - Game Host

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    *Thwacks Bontran* You don't tell someone to renounce their faith, you boneheaded lunkheaded laser brained ... :p [face_laugh]
    This should have Alida's red alert klaxon going off big time! ;)
    =D=
     
  3. Jade_Pilot

    Jade_Pilot Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 10, 2005
    Bontran raised a hand to stop me. ?Alida! Enough! We will not speak of this again. I have allowed you to continue this obsession in private. Do not argue with me.?


    Say...WHAT??? o_O Uh-uh...girlfriend, get out of there as fast as your little lekku will let you!!!! This is NOT the man for you, no matter what you may be thinking right now.

    Great update, Sister-pilot! I just love this story so much and always look forward to your updates.

    Bravo!!! =D=
     
  4. Jedi-2B

    Jedi-2B Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 2, 2000
    I'm happy for Tisa, that the traditional Twi'lek marriage arrangement is right for her. But it's not right for Alida. It's actually a good thing that Bontran made a big deal about the Guardian. Gives Alida a preview of what is to come, before it's too late.
     
  5. Feng_Huang

    Feng_Huang Jedi Master star 2

    Registered:
    Apr 17, 2005
    I would be very surprised if she doesn't strangle him with the necklace. The nerve...[face_not_talking]
     
  6. verybusy

    verybusy Jedi Knight star 2

    Registered:
    Sep 18, 2006
    [face_blush] I never seem to find the time to reply to this one although I am still reading.

    Not much to say... I still love this :)[face_love]

    cheers,

    VeryBusy
     
  7. maramijade

    maramijade Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Feb 17, 2000
    :: shakes head::

    yeah, it's much better if the two share the same belief structure .. or are at least . . . encouraging of differnt beliefs

    not good. . .

    go home after the wedding. . .
     
  8. JadeLotus

    JadeLotus Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 27, 2005
    Great chapters, as always!

    I think Alida's got some thinking to do...
     
  9. MirandaFair

    MirandaFair Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 13, 2005
    He said WHAT to Alida???

    o_O

    Talk to this hand Bontran [face_talk_hand] ...because in the other I have a lightsaber ready to make your acquaintance. [face_devil]


    Oooo! Diva, I hope we get to see Burno whisk her away quickly!!!
     
  10. Star_Angel

    Star_Angel Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 18, 2006
    I don?t know how I feel about Bontran, he seems to be like two people?or two Twi?lek, one that?s kind and caring, and then this other that seems to have a need to control, but maybe it?s just me who think so. Anyway, I loved the update and thanks for the pm.
     
  11. Blue_Milkshake

    Blue_Milkshake Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Nov 18, 2005
    Gasp! I missed a post!

    Bontran?s lekku switched back and forth in irritation, signaling his impatience. ?Look. Believe whatever foolishness you will. I won?t interfere. But if you mention the Guardian in my clan, if you try to talk about her instead of doing what is wise and holding your silence, there will be consequences. I cannot control that.?

    Uh-oh. I have a bad feeling about this...He says now that he won't interfere, but then he removes Alida's necklace. Just how far will his "non-interference" go? I would have a very hard time myself if my intended told me I couldn't ever speak freely about my faith life and then called it "foolishness." :mad:
     
  12. divapilot

    divapilot Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 30, 2005
    Ginchy: GREAT update! Tisa is going to be very happy, but Alida... this is not for her. Maybe she has her first real inklings now??

    Thank you! Sometimes we hear and see only what we want to hear and see, don?t we? [face_worried]

    Outloud I said, "Ooooohhh..." Yeah, cause I can just see what would happen should my husband say that to me (or I to him!). LOL And it ain't perty.

    I?ll bet! It?s not the way that Bruno would have handled that situation, that?s for sure. [face_shame_on_you]


    Jade_Eyes: You don't tell someone to renounce their faith, you boneheaded lunkheaded laser brained ... This should have Alida's red alert klaxon going off big time!

    Thank you for reading! Alida has had too many years on Coruscant, living as she pleased with her freedom. Things are very different on Ryloth. [face_worried] Bontran feels he?s giving her a heads-up, to prepare her for his family.


    Jade_Pilot: Uh-uh...girlfriend, get out of there as fast as your little lekku will let you!!!! This is NOT the man for you, no matter what you may be thinking right now.

    Thank you! I?m tickled that you still like this. Alida has no idea what she is getting into. You?re right, this relationship may not be as compatible as they think.[face_thinking]


    Jedi-2B: I'm happy for Tisa, that the traditional Twi'lek marriage arrangement is right for her. But it's not right for Alida.

    Right now, she still thinks she can control what her marriage will be like. If she were observant, she would see the signs. But she is more focused on the marriage than on the groom!:oops: Thank you for reading.


    Feng_Huang: I would be very surprised if she doesn't strangle him with the necklace. The nerve...

    Thanks! Bontran doesn?t see it as nervy. He thinks he?s doing her a favor.:)



    Verybusy: Thank you for reading! I appreciate it!:D


    Maramijade: it's much better if the two share the same belief structure .. or are at least . . . encouraging of differnt beliefs

    It would certainly make things better. But tolerance is not a quality in great supply on a planet whose greatest export has traditionally been slaves. :( Thank you for reading!


    JadeLotus: I think Alida's got some thinking to do...

    Eventually, Alida will start to catch on, but right now, she?s blissfully blinded by love (or something like it). [face_love] Thank you! I?m happy you are enjoying this.



    MirandaFair: Talk to this hand Bontran ...because in the other I have a lightsaber ready to make your acquaintance.

    Yikes! I?ve read your stuff. You aren?t kidding, are you? :eek:

    There is a culture shock awaiting Alida, and Bontran is trying to prepare her for it. Thank you for the reply! Glad you like this.;)


    StarAngel: don?t know how I feel about Bontran, he seems to be like two people?or two Twi?lek, one that?s kind and caring, and then this other that seems to have a need to control.

    Thanks! You?re right, he is kind of like two people. He?s a decent guy, but like most people, he is influenced by his environment, and on Ryloth women are not valued except for their role of pleasing men. The longer he is around this culture, the more he will act how a Twi?lek man is ?supposed? to act. o_O


    Blue_Milkshake: I have a bad feeling about this...He says now that he won't interfere, but then he removes Alida's necklace. Just how far will his "non-interference" go?

    Exactly. ?Here?s my suggestion. Do it my way.? :rolleyes:

    I would have a very hard time myself if my intended told me I couldn't ever speak freely about my faith life and then called it "foolishness."

    It would make things difficult, wouldn?t it? Especially if your faith brings you courage and resolve. Taking that away could make a person more ? pliable? o_O

    Thank you for your kind response! [:D]
     
  13. divapilot

    divapilot Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 30, 2005
    Entry 13:

    There is a physical ache to be back in the land of your birth, with people who look like you, share your heritage, and communicate the way you do. When you are on your homeworld, you are no longer alien ? or alienated. You no longer have to think about the ?translation? of ideas and customs. You belong.

    That is how I felt when we landed on Ryloth. The landing itself was very difficult, as a sudden storm blew in across the Bright Lands and the extremely high wind tossed our transport violently. We stayed in our cabins, strapped to the emergency seats, and waited for what seemed forever for the transport to settle. Finally, the pilot was able to maneuver the transport into the bottom of the craggy mountainside, in which the city of Sallorca was situated.

    Tisa and Jarron disembarked first, as was appropriate since the city belonged to his clan. His parents met them at the visitors? reception area. They greeted my sister with hugs and smiles. I could read their lekku from where I stood, and their attitude was very favorable. Tisa, for her part, beamed with happiness.

    Following the prescribed hierarchy, my father disembarked next, then lastly myself and Bontran. Jarron?s father was a jovial sort, laughing and merry, and his mother seemed kindly and generous. Jarron had one sister, a young girl of only about 13 or 14. She was very excited about the wedding and eager to meet her new sister-in-law.

    After we met our hosts, we traveled into the city of Sallorca, built within the protective enclosure of the mountains. We entered the inn where the bride?s family and friends were staying, and I strained to see above the bustling crowds of visitors. Finally, I found my mother. I ran over to her and hugged her tightly.

    She held me at arms? length, her eyes bright. ?You have grown so, Alida,? she said. ?Soon both of my girls will be married and I will have to visit another clan to see them.? I sensed the sadness in her voice and through her subtly shifting lekku.

    I reached out and held her hand. ?Mother, Tisa and I will never be far away.? I laughed and hugged her again. ?Now that we are back home on Ryloth, you?ll be able to visit all the time. But first, I have so much to tell you!?

    She reached for my lekku and affectionately stroked my tchun with the back of her hand. ?Darling, I want to hear everything. Tell me about your betrothed. What is he like??

    I started to speak, then realized that someone was approaching. I looked up to see my father. Mother turned to see who I was looking at, and her face lit in a sweet smile.

    Father stood at the end of the cushioned couch. ?Hello, Gallena,? he said softly.

    I kissed my mother on the cheek. ?I will meet with you later,? I promised. As I left the room, I saw my father sit on the cushion beside my mother. They did not have much time together, and I would not interfere with their company.

    Mother and Father had not seen each other for almost a year when they met up again at Tisa?s wedding. Although I wanted more time to visit with my mother, I did not interfere with their reunion. They deserved to enjoy their time together.

    My parents? relationship was unlike any other I have known, Twi?lek or human. My father had lived on Coruscant for almost ten years, while my mother had chosen to live in Clan Navarth on Ryloth. They communicated constantly, especially when Tisa and I were younger, and my sister and I had spent time living with both of them, although we had lived mostly with Mother.

    Mother clung to the familiar and the secure. I think mother?s attitude was partly a result of how non-humans were discriminated against under the Empire, and how, for Twi?lek women, travel was often a dangerous affair. I think, though, a part of her reluctance to travel to Coruscant had to do with her position in the clan. She came from a clan of some substance, and marrying my father had cost her some of her social standing. Although there was love between them, she feared losing her status any further by being away too long from the complex and
     
  14. ginchy

    ginchy Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 25, 2005
    Beautiful chapter as always, lady! Good thing I twisted your arm to post it! ;) I know I keep saying it, but all the rich detail you add is what always sets your stories apart, and makes a Diva-fic so worth the read!! I think you will write the book on Twi'lek culture yet!

    Oh, Alida. She seems to be viewing everything as an outsider, even if her opening remarks were about coming home. And I had to chuckle at her parents' relationship--it's very much like my mom and her boyfriend's. They've been together 22 years, we live in Kentucky and he lives in Virgina! They get together about once every two months, and it works perfectly for them. Momma says that if he lived here they would have either broken up by now, or she would have killed him. ;) So, some long-distance relationships can work!

    Great, great update!! =D=
     
  15. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Game Host Who Loves Fanfics & RPGs star 7 VIP - Game Host

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    The ceremony was exquisite in its richness and symbolism. Tisa was a ravishing bride. :) Alida seems bedazzled--as who wouldn't be by the whole thing. But--not being able to talk with her mother and get her advice [face_worried] She seems more resolved than ever. [face_worried] Alida is a woman of integrity and honesty. Once she commits or pledges to Bontran, and if she feels like she has, she will find it next to impossible to break it. [face_thinking]
    Fantab update. =D= =D=
    Can't wait for her meeting with the prospective in-laws ;)
     
  16. Jade_Pilot

    Jade_Pilot Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 10, 2005
    You continue to amaze us, Sister-pilot! Just breathtaking! I loved all the rich cultural insights, the Twilek wedding rituals and the wonderful characterizations.

    Your opening lines touched my heart:

    There is a physical ache to be back in the land of your birth, with people who look like you, share your heritage, and communicate the way you do. When you are on your homeworld, you are no longer alien ? or alienated. You no longer have to think about the ?translation? of ideas and customs. You belong.


    And Botran, not 'permitting' our girl to chat with her mother? Oh Alida, girl! What have you gotten yourself into?

    Bravo! =D= =D=
     
  17. MirandaFair

    MirandaFair Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 13, 2005
    My adventure awaited.

    Wonderful chapter that was rich with tradition and beautiful description. @};- You have such a great hold of your OCs and the customs on Ryloth. I know you mentioned earlier there wasn't much for you to draw on and you had to improvise. Whatever isn't considered canon here, those things should be considered - it's so seamless. I hope that made some sense? I'll blame my looniness on it being late on a Friday night. 8-}

    I'm still hoping Bruno comes in to rescue Alida. [face_praying] Before it's too late!

    Diva...you're amazing! =D=
     
  18. Jedi-2B

    Jedi-2B Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 2, 2000
    What an interesting depiction of Twi'lek culture you're weaving. I don't know how much of it is canon, and how much you're conjecturing, and really, it doesn't matter because the 'truth' can't possibly be any more delightful and insightful. =D=

    And Bontran is getting more and more controlling. At least we have the satisfaction of knowing who Alida ends up with. :)
     
  19. JadeLotus

    JadeLotus Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 27, 2005
    What a beautiful wedding - as always, you give such a richness and depth to Twi'lek culture.


    There is a physical ache to be back in the land of your birth, with people who look like you, share your heritage, and communicate the way you do. When you are on your homeworld, you are no longer alien ? or alienated. You no longer have to think about the ?translation? of ideas and customs. You belong.

    Being away from home at the moment, I can really empathise with this. =D=
     
  20. Blue_Milkshake

    Blue_Milkshake Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Nov 18, 2005
    My parents? relationship was unlike any other I have known, Twi?lek or human. My father had lived on Coruscant for almost ten years, while my mother had chosen to live in Clan Navarth on Ryloth. They communicated constantly,...

    What a tremendous challenge Alida's parents live with. It's good that they know the secret of constant communication.

    He placed the banner over Tisa?s shoulders. (This is a very ancient tradition. It was once believed that during the exchange of names, it was possible for a person?s soul to escape while the person was between names. The banner, presumably, kept the soul in place until the new name could be assigned.)

    =D=I too love all your scrumptious details!

    Bontran and I danced together throughout the night. I would have liked to spend a little more time with my mother, since Bontran and I were planning to leave in the morning, but it seemed that every time I had an opportunity to go find her, I would feel Bontran?s hand in mine and off we went to the dance floor again.

    [face_thinking]Hmmm, this seems pretty selfish of Bontran. Makes me feel uncomfortable, like he's trying to keep Alida separated from her own mother.
     
  21. Star_Angel

    Star_Angel Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 18, 2006
    I loved the update, it was great to read about Twi?lek traditions.
     
  22. Jedi Trace

    Jedi Trace SouthEast RSA star 6 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Dec 15, 1999
    Bontran raised a hand to stop me. ?Alida! Enough! We will not speak of this again. I have allowed you to continue this obsession in private. Do not argue with me.?

    Oh. No. He. DID-un't!! [face_shame_on_you]

    Alida, you better run, gurl! [face_not_talking]


    Marvelous chapters! :D The wedding ceremony was incredible. Again, you amaze me with your attention to detail. =D=






     
  23. divapilot

    divapilot Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 30, 2005
    Ginchy: I think you will write the book on Twi'lek culture yet!

    It seems so, doesn?t it? They seem to have taken over. [face_alien_1]

    Oh, Alida. She seems to be viewing everything as an outsider, even if her opening remarks were about coming home.

    Alida is an outsider in a way, having lived elsewhere and knowing what other opportunities exist. Thanks for the reply and the compliments! Your momma and her sweetheart seem like a good match![face_love]


    Jade_Eyes: The ceremony was exquisite in its richness and symbolism. Tisa was a ravishing bride. Alida seems bedazzled--as who wouldn't be by the whole thing. But--not being able to talk with her mother and get her advice

    Thank you!! Tisa?s wedding was a success. But Jarron?s family is not Bontran?s family. And the signs are there ? Alida just doesn?t want to see them. Denial is a comfy place.[face_whistling]

    She seems more resolved than ever. Alida is a woman of integrity and honesty. Once she commits or pledges to Bontran, and if she feels like she has, she will find it next to impossible to break it.

    You?re right --Things will get sticky.[face_worried]

    Fantab update. Can't wait for her meeting with the prospective in-laws

    Thanks so much! In-laws coming up next.[face_dancing]


    Jade_Pilot: I loved all the rich cultural insights, the Twilek wedding rituals and the wonderful characterizations.

    Thank you![:D]

    And Botran, not 'permitting' our girl to chat with her mother? Oh Alida, girl! What have you gotten yourself into?

    More than she knows! There are ominous signs that she is choosing to ignore. You know how it is; ?I can change him once we?re married.? If you feel you need to fix him, then there is something broken to begin with.[face_shame_on_you]


    MirandaFair: Wonderful chapter that was rich with tradition and beautiful description. I know you mentioned earlier there wasn't much for you to draw on and you had to improvise. Whatever isn't considered canon here, those things should be considered - it's so seamless.

    Thank you so much! I really appreciate that! I actually based the idea of the wedding dance on Wookieepedia?s description of Oola, and how shocked she was that she was given that skimpy, cheap outfit to dance in instead of the veils that a traditional dance required. (Remember the Rose Bowl parade, with the women dressed up as Oola? I wonder if they knew they were wearing clothes that were hootchie even for a Twi?lek.)[face_laugh]


    Jedi-2B: What an interesting depiction of Twi'lek culture you're weaving.

    Thank you! Glad you like it. :D

    And Bontran is getting more and more controlling. At least we have the satisfaction of knowing who Alida ends up with.

    Sometimes it?s good to know the ending. The story is in how they get there. Alida has to learn to stand on her own two feet, but Bontran isn?t really interested in that. :rolleyes:


    JadeLotus: What a beautiful wedding - as always, you give such a richness and depth to Twi'lek culture.

    Thank you! I hope you are enjoying your travels and will have wonderful stories to tell when you get home again. [:D]


    Blue_Milkshake: What a tremendous challenge Alida's parents live with. It's good that they know the secret of constant communication.

    Some people can?t live with or without each other. Tavord and Gallena are like that. [face_love]

    I too love all your scrumptious details!

    Thank you!!:D

    this seems pretty selfish of Bontran. Makes me feel uncomfortable, like he's trying to keep Alida separated from her own mother.

    Maybe not intentionally, but he certainly sees Alida?s wish to visit with her mom as being less important than his desire to canoodle with Alida.:rolleyes:


    Star_Angel: Thank you very much!O:)


    Jedi_Trace Oh. No. He. DID-un't!!

    Sigh. Yes, he did. An
     
  24. divapilot

    divapilot Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 30, 2005
    Entry 14:

    Imagine entering a room to see a great banquet spread before you. Tables laden with generous slices of meat, hearty breads, and succulent fruit await you. When you come close and reach for something to eat, however, you notice that things are not as they appear from a distance. Everything is beautiful in appearance and presented elegantly, but when you observe closely, you see that the food has started to spoil and the stench of decay already assaults you.

    That is what Clan Parrul was like when I came to live with Bontran.

    Our first few days were enjoyable, as he took me to different interesting places in the city of Parrul. We lived like tourists in his city, enjoying fine dining and entertainment. Once we had seen the sights, we entered his family compound. His clan family was very highly placed. In fact, his uncle was on the city?s Council of Five, which meant that they controlled the entire city. Since his uncle had no sons, Bontran?s father would be the next to take over when Bontran?s uncle died. (It was unlikely that Bontran would ever hold a position on the city Council of Five, since after his father, there was Bontran?s oldest brother Ralloud?parrul, Ralloud?parrul?s son, and finally the other two brothers before Bontran was even eligible for the office.)

    A week after I arrived in Parrul, Bontran informed me that our vacation was over, and I was to meet his father. I was nervous as I dressed, as his father?s opinion of me was of paramount importance. I remembered Bontran?s earlier advice and left the necklace that Tisa had given me with my other things. I hoped I was presentable. If his father did not like me, he would have the right to send me back to Clan Navarth, even if Bontran objected.

    We opened the office doors anxiously. Bontran approached his father?s desk as I stood in the doorway. Two men were in the office, one older one seated at the desk, and a middle-aged, fierce-looking man, with a single lek wrapped across his shoulders, standing beside him. They looked at us as we entered the room. The older man glanced up and motioned to the other. ?Ralloud, we shall discuss this plan later,? he said.

    Ralloud bowed. ?As you wish, Father.? He turned to leave, clasping Bontran?s shoulder as he walked past. He ignored me as he went through the doorway.

    Bontran?s father sat expectantly at his desk. ?Father, I wish to present my intended,? Bontran announced.

    Bontran?s father squinted his rheumy eyes at me. Disregarding his son, he beckoned for me to approach. I stood in front of the desk, next to Bontran, and lowered my eyes. My lekku signaled respect and honesty.

    Bontran?s father stared at me for a moment or two. ?Turn around,? he barked. I turned around. After another moment, he announced, ?She?s fat. What do you want with a fat wife, Bontran??

    I controlled my lekku from switching from side to side, aghast at his bold statement. I continued to keep my eyes lowered.

    ?Father, she isn?t fat. On Coruscant, women look like this. It?s normal,? I heard Bontran say.

    His father harrumphed. ?Have you met the criteria for compatibility?? he asked impatiently.

    ?Yes, we did, Father. She and I are quite compatible, and we wish to marry as--?

    His father cut him off. ?Does she know how to dance??

    ?Yes, Father,? Bontran replied. I cringed. I wasn?t a very good dancer.

    Apparently his father caught my expression because he then asked, ?Sienn Navarth, is there a problem with dancing to entertain my son?? (He used the term ?Sienn,? which means ?maiden.? On Coruscant, one might say ?Miss,? although that is not a clean translation. ?Sienn? carries the connotation that the person addressing you does not feel intimate or familiar enough with you to grant you the right to be addressed by your given name. It is not an insult, but there is a sense of formal distance.)

    ?No, sir,? I replied. ?I just haven?t danced in a while.?

    ?Well, then, what do you do?? he asked.

    I stole a glance at Bontran, who smiled encouragingly. ?I cook, sir,? I said.

    Bontran?s father brok
     
  25. Jade_Pilot

    Jade_Pilot Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 10, 2005
    Imagine entering a room to see a great banquet spread before you. Tables laden with generous slices of meat, hearty breads, and succulent fruit await you. When you come close and reach for something to eat, however, you notice that things are not as they appear from a distance. Everything is beautiful in appearance and presented elegantly, but when you observe closely, you see that the food has started to spoil and the stench of decay already assaults you.

    That is what Clan Parrul was like when I came to live with Bontran.


    I love this whole set up! The exquisite detail and the appeal to my senses draws me completely into your story. :D


    Bontran?s father stared at me for a moment or two. ?Turn around,? he barked. I turned around. After another moment, he announced, ?She?s fat. What do you want with a fat wife, Bontran??

    Say what????????? :eek: Run, Alida. Hike up those saucy legs of yours and head for the hills, girlfriend!!!!

    I turned to him. ?He said I was fat! And how long will you be gone? I thought you said we would live together until the wed--? Bontran covered my mouth with a kiss. At first, annoyed with his response, I tried to push away, but then he was so eager and tender that I found myself returning the kiss.

    You are better than this girl! Bontran is manipulating you and you are smart enough to figure it out. Hmpf! [face_shame_on_you]

    Bontran sighed exasperatedly. ?Alida, this is my job. I can handle it. I don?t need you to tell me how to do my profession.? He tugged my hand, and I fell on the bed. He rolled over and began to nuzzle my neck. ?You talk too much, little one,? he scolded.

    Where is the exit? 'Cause you're five minutes late for the door!


    The next daystart, Bontran brought me to the dining hall early. We walked together through the gardens, which were remarkable places considering that we were underground. Prisms were built into the roof and the sides of the compound, sending bright rays of sunshine into the complex. There must have been a very talented gardener here at one time to design this. Plants that thrived in sunlight grew strong and fragrant, while the twilight blooms edged the borders and areas of perpetual shadow. Since Ryloth does not rotate on an axis, shadows never move and there is no ?dawn? or ?sunset.? The gardener cleverly used plants that thrived in each level of solar exposure.

    Wonderful little side line scene here. Lovely detail and descriptions. Great idea about the prisms. :)

    A long wooden table dominated the room, with comfortable chairs surrounding it. Against the wall were buffets, such as used for holding serving dishes and beverages. I counted six of them. Since there were twelve chairs against the table, that seemed a very luxurious ratio of one server to every two diners.

    I like how you set this up. As if the wives and husbands would all be seated around the tables. It makes the shocker that follows that much more poignant.

    I drew a deep breath. At home in Coruscant, I always ate with Father. We discussed the days? events and shared our conversations. I could not imagine serving him, then standing in a corner to await his demands. He would not want that, either. My mind flashed for a moment to a memory of sitting at a table at the restaurant, a bouquet of freshly cut blue star lilies beside me on the white linens, and a dark-haired human caressing my hand.

    I like how Alida flashes back to a meal eaten with Bruno. Perhaps this is where she begins to awaken from her denial?


    Wonderful update Sister-pilot! The richness and great characters just make it sing! Then you come along with this compelling plot and I'm totally besotted.

    Well done and Bravo! =D=

     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.