Census the lesser of two evils

For me the Hobbit trilogy is the worst, most insipid trilogy ever. I just saw the third one and I am actually angry. Only immensly stupid people or the thoroughly lobotimised could enjoy that.
Peter Jackson is worse than George Lucas. And worse than Hitler, by extension.

 

Your opinion. not mine.

 

duh

 

That's just great, SkywalkerNumbers.

Tell me, did you get a bit teary with Kili? You know, Kili - he's the one who's in the script so he can have TEH LOEV!! <3 with Tamriel? Appreciate it's hard to distinguish the dwarves since they don't have coherent personalities and just do **** because the script says so. "I'm Thorin, I'm going mad... Wait, now I need to be clear of vision and ready to rumble!"
Did you heart explode with giddy joy when Legolas did his magical backflips? I admit, when he saw all of Tamriel was in trouble I didn't at all see the EMPTY QUIVER trick coming. Nor did I see Azog the Destrier burst up through the ice. Such visionary!

Oh and I loved seeing Orlando Bloom in Assassin's Creed: Elvish Nonce.

There were moments in this film where I was just laughing aloud at how insultingly dumb it was. The "go find Aragorn" bit. The pointless Galadriel/Elrond/Obviously CG Christopher Lee fight. Gandalf's patent asberger's - everyone's all teary and he's loudly trying to clean his pipe because he can't read emotion because Tobey Maguire wasn't the only autistic hero, amirite?

I would gladly watch the prequels and Mannequin's accidental stumble-but-it's-ok-guys-I-didn't-fall-I-caught-myself-in-time to the dark side than ever sit through this tripe again. Though I'm pretty sure the flatulent cow of Tolkien's estate has been thoroughly beaten dry of all the nuggets of gold it has previously pooped out. I can't wait for them to adapt the Shadow of Mordor game, that's 2 hrs of boring fights and undeveloped characters.

Though I have to note the three things I liked:

* Their Warhammer: The Movie scenes looked great. Too bad it was padded with turds, like, everywhere
* The shot of Gandalf after he parts with Dildo at the end was reminiscent of the John Howe illustration that inspired the film Gandalf look
* Billy Connolly was great as Gotrek Gurnisson; but where was Felix?



Billy Connolly as Dain Ironfoot Gotrek

 

I was ready to punch Peter Jackson in the face about half way through the fellowship of the ring. I really need to avoid these hobbit films.

 

I know, right? I was irrationally angry, for a number of reasons:

1) It's hard to sit back and watch evil and do nothing;
2) I fondly recall his book from my childhood and resent the relentless rape of it, and
3) Idiots will undoubtedly like it.

I found a number of videos which are cinematics from video games. They are inherently better than the 3 padded Hobbit films:

 

I am disturbed that we agree so thoroughly on this issue.

 

So you couldn't troll the actual Hobbit thread enough so you had to start a whole other thread to do so. Now that is insipid.

 

I think it's rather kind of him to make a separate thread for discussing how truly miserable the film trilogy is, so that people can still share silly sentiments on the films in peace.

 

Don't use words you don't understand in the hope we may one day respect your intellect. We can't.

anakinfansince1983 - you can tell he indeed wrote this as you watch the films.

 

Insipid = lacking taste among other meanings and it is perfect and used correctly.

 

Look you.

You are just about the only person who might know Felix and Gotrek so if you won't agree that Big Yin was a Warhammer dwarf then the world is stuffed.

 

I liked the idea behind the PT's political plot and the whole Sidious bit, but the whole thing was way too childish with barely any moral to wrap it up. The Hobbit series at least had the home/friendship/etc morals holding it together. The PT was more like "don't be angry, especially if you have no daddy because then you'll be the anti-Christ" or whatever.

The PT also just kept introducing characters to throw under the rug without any purpose. Like Dooku, or Bail who actually had a strong tie to the OT but was instead horribly misused. Even the Clone Wars were underused and left to be developed by the Cartoon Network. And then we've got the wonderful wife-beating ending.

As much as I like sci-fi over fantasy, I can't defend the PT.

 

Yeah I was never angry after the first viewing in the cinema. That came about 3hrs later with AotC and RotS.

 

Hobbit.

Never take one book and try to bleed three films out of it.

 

I decided not to go see the third Hobbit movie for a number of reasons:

1) I've been taking a stand against crappy franchises this year after having too many regrets from going to see movies I was "supposed" to see in recent years (looking at you, Dark Knight Rises). That means this year no Amazing Spider-Man 2, and no Hobbit 3. I hadn't quite grown enough as a person to skip X Men: DOFP yet, but I learned my lesson. I felt really smug walking into Birdman instead of some crappy franchise sequel a few weeks ago, and that warm glow of superiority persists to this moment. (Also it's clearly the superior Emma Stone Movie to that dreck they're passing off as Spider-Man.)

2) I went to see the first one and mostly regretted it. I went to see the second one and mostly regretted it. Pattern recognition.

3) Quite simply, Peter Jackson promised two movies, and I went to see two movies. He's the one who ****ed up here.


I agree with Ender and Anakinfan that while the PT sucks, I didn't hate them while I was watching them, and usually it took me a few months to a few days after watching them to realize how crappy they are. Also I'm honestly not sure if I ever saw ROTS in its entirety a second time, but I've watched TPM and AOTC several times each. I still enjoy TPM for what it is - a kids' movie, and there's a good movie salvageable somewhere in AOTC, just really, really buried in there where I don't think you could salvage that much from the Hobbit trilogy. I really would love to see Topher Grace's PT recut someday.

 

Lucas at least mangled his own story. As creator he is entitled to write it and contradict it and modify it any way he wants.

Jackson adapted someone else's story yet still tried to create his own by inventing new stuff for no reason other than to make 3 long movies because money

 

Ender is not alone. He just has the common sense and dignity to start another thread so those who love Peter Jackson's perversions won't feel like they are being trolled.

 

TBOTFA was excruciatingly painful to watch both figuratively and literally.

 

I went with the prequels, because I haven't watched The Sorbet. Back in the OT days I didn't learn after every disaster, managed to be hopeful that "the next one would be the good one", and kept watching them only to find more heartbreak. Thanks to that experience, I went NOPE NOPE NOPE after An Unnecessary Journey. Silver linings!

 

I've so far managed to avoid entry 3 of the Hobbit but went Prequels as they are a stain on my memory that I can't remove but the Hobbit has largely been forgotten