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Before - Legends The Nameless Ones [OC's] -- Updated 12/07

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Ceillean, Dec 2, 2009.

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  1. Ceillean

    Ceillean Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Nov 13, 2001
    Title: The Nameless Ones
    Author: Ceillean
    Characters: OC's
    Genre: Action/Adventure/Romance
    Timeline: no idea whatsoever
    Notes: This is my third try at writing something decent for Before the Saga. It's an OC story only because I honestly know nothing about characters in Before. But I thought this story would best fit here.
    Enjoy. :)



    [b]One[/b]

    Dark, muddied water splashed along his legs as his booted feet thundered along the pedwalk. Heart racing beneath his chest, he risked a quick glance over his shoulder. There was no doubt in his mind that the [i]Nameless One[/i] was still searching, still following. He could feel it in his very bones.

    Altair stopped and held his breath, eyes narrowed in the darkness. The planet was unknown to him, the tall buildings and weaving streets with floating vehicles an entirely new experience. Somehow he would have to make do and somehow he would have to escape the [i]Nameless One[/i].

    Altair closed his eyes and inhaled ill smelling air, tapping into the Force. Tendrils of energy enveloped him in an invisible light, a walking breathing beacon of hope. He was a Jedi Knight, one of the last Jedi Knights of the [i]Order Of Ascension[/i]. And his worst nightmare was out to kill him.

    Replenishing his energy reserves by way of the Force, Altair pulled his thick black cloak closer about himself. Pinpointing the [i]Nameless One[/i] was all but impossible. He was a master of deception, a master of manipulation and above all a master of death. His targets never survived.

    Altair would make sure he was the sole exception.

    Heading towards an overpopulated district, a market place of sorts he thought, Altair kept a low profile. Native music assaulted his ears, along with smells and scents he couldn?t recognize and, truth be told, didn?t want to recognize. His home world of Chandrila was by far more advanced than this backwater turf. Needless to say he didn?t like being here but his current predicament left him no other choice.

    As Altair walked on and inadvertently bumped into pedestrians as the market was packed with beings, he concentrated on the Force and his surroundings. The dark blue sky made for a poor view but he saw enough to know that hiding wouldn?t be much of a problem. It was masking himself, his scent, his Force signature that was giving him a headache.

    Turning a corner and heading down a flight of stairs towards an area that harbored an enormous water fountain, Altair kept close to the walls of the buildings. From the corner of his eye he watched as a group of young kids pointed in his direction and even though he?d wanted to be anonymous, he?d caused the opposite instead. Of course, the only being wearing a clean, expensive looking black cloak on the market would be an eye catcher. Too immersed in images of the [i]Nameless One[/i] gutting him, the idea of blending in with normal folk had slipped his mind.

    Cursing his own stupidity, Altair ran. He had no destination in mind. He simply let his feet carry him where ever the Force led him.

    Minutes passed as he ran like crazy. His lungs burned, there was a stitch in his side and his legs stung. Stopping wasn?t an option. Not yet, anyway. He found himself in an open area with tall buildings housing living quarters. The area felt calm and at peace and here he was disturbing that which these people considered their haven.
    Well, tough.

    About to turn another corner, Altair had just a second to react as someone ran into him, knocking him to the ground. His cloak slipped from his shoulders as he lay there trying to catch a breath. The sudden weight atop his chest made it hard to move and when he lifted his head, he was surprised to see a woman staring back at him.
    Altair sat up abruptly and the woman scrambled away while wiping dirty hands on an even dirtier skirt.

    ?Sorry.? She said, her forehead pulled into a deep frown. ?I didn?t see you.?

    Holding his annoyance at bay, he swiftly jumped to his feet and bent down to retrieve his cloak. ?Are you alright??

    She nodded once. ?Yes. You??

    A tingling sensation ran along his sp>
     
  2. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Game Host Who Loves Fanfics & RPGs star 7 VIP - Game Host

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    I don't know enough about Before either. I've started reading fics about someone called Darth Revan and Basila and Jedi Trace wrote some interesting drabbles about some Before characters-- :D

    This looks interesting indeed.

    Altair ... such a nice Britishy name [face_laugh]

    The Nameless One -- very mysterious ;)

    I'd like PMs if you're keeping a list?

    @};-

     
  3. Raphire

    Raphire Jedi Knight star 4

    Registered:
    Dec 19, 2008
    PM List? It was very good!
     
  4. Corellian_Ale

    Corellian_Ale Manager Emeritus star 4 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Mar 3, 2008
    Absolutely piqued my interest here Ceillean!!!

    Please PM me when you update! :)
     
  5. Ceillean

    Ceillean Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Nov 13, 2001
     
  6. Ceillean

    Ceillean Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Nov 13, 2001
    Two

    Once, a long time ago, water had almost taken her life. She had watched, immobile, as the darkness had covered her from above, taking away the only source of light and with it the air to breathe. She had never learned to swim and for what reason really? After all, she wasn?t a sea dwelling creature.

    But Ghaniyah wished she had learned because now her life depended on it.

    Holding back an onslaught of panic proved difficult as everything around her grew instantly dark when she fell into the thick, smelling river of the undercity. No one in their right mind would ever voluntarily stick a single finger into the muck that surrounded the market. But desperate times called for desperate measures.

    She flailed her arms and legs, fighting against the darkness that surrounded her. Her first objective was to swim to the surface but how if she had never learned? Ghanyiah craned her neck upwards and blinked her eyes open, hoping that perhaps she would see an inkling of clear light to show her the way. She saw absolutely nothing.

    Darkness with smudges of dirty brown and spots of yellow. She nearly shrieked when a floating, spiky creature swam directly in front of her face, wiggling its finned tail back and forth. Opening her mouth had not been the smartest idea, Ghanyiah noted a moment later. The taste was horrendous. She felt something small and round move along her tongue and she did her best to spit it out before whatever it was did any harm.
    Her face crunched up into a mask of disgust as she hurried to reach the surface, thrusting her legs outward, pulling herself upward along an imaginary rope. Yet the harder she tried, the further she sunk.

    Panic held her in an icy grip.

    Ghanyiah hurried her movements, her lungs screaming in white hot pain. It was just like back then when she had been nine years old. It was the feeling of helplessness, of hopelessness that scared her, the knowledge that no one was going to reach out a hand and pull her up this time. She was going to die. In the murky, stinking depths of the waste river.

    Just wonderful.

    There was movement from the corner of her eye. Instinctively she tried to cower away, arms stretched forward as if to grasp the last straw of hope to make it out of the water alive. No one knew for sure what sort of creatures swam beneath the surface and Ghanyia did not want to find out, not like this.

    It was the firm grip around her wrist that cleared her mind. She felt as someone pulled her along underneath the water, upwards towards air. Yet she struggled because she couldn?t hold her breath much longer. Her lungs burned as if someone had lit her chest on fire. But she saw light from above and seconds later she broke the surface and breathed in sweet fresh air ? before coughing and hacking like an old woman with worm lungs.

    ?We don?t have much time.? She heard the stranger say.

    Ghanyia paid his words no attention as she scrambled to hold on to his shoulders as if her life depended on it. He dipped down into the water trying to carry her weight but she didn?t care. Better him than her.

    When he managed to hold them both above water, he swam towards the shore with her clinging to his shoulders like a frightened little girl. They had come up almost a kilometer downstream, away from the bridge and the maniac who was out to kill the stranger.

    A moment later, Ghanyia crawled up onto the slippery mound of a small hill, still coughing and still having to deal with the taste of the water in her mouth. She yearned for a long, hot bath and something sweet to wash her mouth with.

    ?Are you mad?? She squealed suddenly, rounding on the stranger, eyes blazing with anger when she finally found her footing. ?Do you have any idea how dangerous that river is?? She raised her voice. ?And I drank of it!?

    ?Might have been smart to keep your mouth shut then.?

    Ghanyia sucked in a breath, hardly believing what she heard. ?How dare you ??

    ?Save it for later.? He made a chopping gesture with his hand. ?We need to get out of here. It won?t be long until he finds us.?
     
  7. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Game Host Who Loves Fanfics & RPGs star 7 VIP - Game Host

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Super details about how Ghaniya felt before being rescued and after. =D=

    From what Altair said, it appears the Nameless One is after the Jedi and anyone who associates with them and is in a position of some authority [face_thinking]

    Like a self-appointed dictator. o_O

     
  8. Raphire

    Raphire Jedi Knight star 4

    Registered:
    Dec 19, 2008
    She frowned. ?Who are you??

    ?I?m a friend.?

    Somehow she doubted it. ?And the other man??

    ?He?s the one you need to worry about.?


    Yeah. That's what he wants you to think.

    Great job! I loved how shocked he was when she punched him.[face_laugh]

    Keep up the good work.=D=
     
  9. Maggy

    Maggy Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Oct 2, 2004
    Ceillean

    She frowned. ?Who are you??

    ?I?m a friend.?

    Somehow she doubted it. ?And the other man??

    ?He?s the one you need to worry about.?


    Hilarious, and so true [face_laugh]

    This filthy, dirty woman had punched him!

    LOL !!!!



    Awesome, Cei =D=

     
  10. Corellian_Ale

    Corellian_Ale Manager Emeritus star 4 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Mar 3, 2008
    [face_laugh] Quite the odd couple here!

    I'm hoping they can last long enough to get out of there to somewhere they can hide from this Nameless One [face_worried]
     
  11. NalanaBrookes

    NalanaBrookes Jedi Youngling

    Registered:
    Dec 10, 2009
    These are great =D=
    Too bad you havn't updated in a while :(
     
  12. SoA

    SoA Jedi Knight star 3

    Registered:
    Apr 2, 2008
    Great story! This Order of Ascention has me very curious as does this Nameless one. I am liking how fiesty Ghanyia is. She already seems like a fascinating character. Add me to the PM list if you have one.
     
  13. Lilith Demodae

    Lilith Demodae Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Oct 1, 1999
    This is fantastic so far!

    And don't worry about not knowing the canon characters in Before. OCs are usually much more interesting.

    Please, add me to your PM list. :)
     
  14. ElvisTheCat

    ElvisTheCat Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Nov 6, 2009
    Off to a great start here with some very memorable characters. If you're doing PMs when you update, I'd like to be on the list.
     
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