1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Story [The Pretender] Three Hours to the Nearest Phone [2021 FanFic Olympics Pentathlon]

Discussion in 'Non Star Wars Fan Fiction' started by DaenaBenjen42, Aug 29, 2011.

  1. DaenaBenjen42

    DaenaBenjen42 Jedi Grand Master star 5

    May 15, 2005
    Title: Three Hours to the Nearest Phone
    Author: DaenaBenjen42
    Fandom: The Pretender
    Characters: Jarod and Miss Parker
    Genre: Drama
    Disclaimer: Still happily borrowing.
    Notes: So? Hazel wanted some Pretender, and BrightFeather told me to make it good. I did my best. And, also a quote from the]Shakespearean[/URL] Quotation Roulette: #44 "I have no other reason but a woman's reason: I think him so because I think him so." -The Two Gentlemen of Verona (I.ii.23-24)


    It was three hours to the nearest phone when she found him. Three hours from what she considered the start, if not the heart, of civilization. Three hours, all the way out to this cabin in the wilderness that looked, from the outside, about as inviting as the lower levels of The Centre and three times as decrepit.

    Standing on the porch of the cabin, she almost spun on her heel and took off. Almost. She was stopped from doing so when Jarod opened the door to stare at her in amusement. "Well, hello. Were you going to knock?"

    "No. I was going to leave. Quickly."

    Jarod tilted his head in question, wondering at her tone. "Without even a talk?"

    She stared at him, dumbfounded. "You left cryptic messages as clues! With taped-on magazine letters! And a poem about a lake!"

    He glanced behind her at the lake in question, then looked straight at her again. "But you did figure it out. That's the important part."

    She sobered, suddenly realizing that yelling at him wasn't going to solve anything. "Why did you want me to come out here?"

    Laughing, Jarod ushered her inside and shut the door. "You needed a vacation. We all need a vacation."

    "And you wanted to have a vacation with me? I've been trying to capture you for years!"

    Jarod laughed again and went into the cabin's small kitchen, and she couldn't help but follow him. She was surprised when he handed her a coffee cup with a tea bag on the side, clear water inside radiating heat. "I only recently discovered what a vacation is. Seemed the right time to try having one. Is that so bad?"

    Miss Parker stared at the cup in her hands for a moment, his words reaching her on a level she wasn't used to thinking of him on. She knew he'd been discovering things, seemingly little and insignificant, that other people took for granted, for a long time. Who was she to deny that he was right, and that it was a good idea? "Daddy will have a fit if he ever finds out, you know. And no... aside from the part where it's my duty to capture you, it's not so bad. Vacation?"

    "Vacation," he agreed.

    "What am I going to tell them?" she wondered as she put the tea bag in the water and watched it darken. "I can't very well say that I had you all to myself in a cabin by a lake three hours from the nearest phone, Ratboy."

    Jarod smiled as she started to relax. "We have three days to think about that, Miss Parker."

    "You can use my name, you know."

    He stepped closer, took the cup from her hands, set it on the counter, and kissed her solidly. "I know." And then he said her name in ear, and she smiled into his shoulder.

    No. She wasn't going to tell them anything. Not one thing. In three days, they'd retake the roles they usually had, do the cat-and-mouse game again and again, but for right now... Jarod was going to experience something he'd never had before: a vacation. For real. No cleaners. No sweepers... no reporting any of this to anyone but Sid. Especially not her father or Mr. Raines.

    Unnoticed for a while on the countertop, her tea cooled.

    Last edited: Jul 4, 2021
    Vek Talis likes this.
  2. Hazel

    Hazel Jedi Master star 4

    Nov 9, 2010
    The Pretender [face_dancing]

    Hahaha, that was funny. I love that Jarod thought of Miss Parker to share in his 1st vacation and that she decided to not tell anyone about it.

    She is in dire need of a vacation.

    Great job =D=
  3. Mira_Jade

    Mira_Jade The (FavoriteTM) Fanfic Mod With the Cape star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Jun 29, 2004
    Oh, this brought back some wonderful memories. The Pretender was one of the first things I fangirled over. :p

    And that being said, the tone of this was perfect! Jarod was just so calm and witty, and Miss Parker's more acerbic sarcasm was wonderfully portrayed.

    And then this:

    "I only recently discovered what a vacation is. Seemed the right time to try having one. Is that so bad?"

    For the win. [face_laugh]!

    Oh Jarod . . . :p


    ~MJ @};-
  4. brodiew

    brodiew Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Oct 11, 2005
    I'm another Pretender fan in the house. :cool: I enjoyed this as well DaenaBenjen2.

    I liked this imptromptu kiss as well as how you incorporated their "vacations" from the cat and mouse game their circumstances demanded. I'd love to see more.

    I might write something myself...[face_thinking]

    Any ideas?
  5. DaenaBenjen42

    DaenaBenjen42 Jedi Grand Master star 5

    May 15, 2005
    Hazel: She totally is in need of a vacation. Thank you, Hazel. :)

    Mira_Jade: Thank you, Mira. :)

    brodiew: I never say no to writing more... just not right now. And as for ideas: go where your imagination takes you, sir. I'd love to see what you come up with. Thank you. :)
  6. DaenaBenjen42

    DaenaBenjen42 Jedi Grand Master star 5

    May 15, 2005
    A/N: I never did say no to continuing this story of Jarod getting to have a vacation now that he knows what one is, but I also was quite happy to leave the story exactly where I did with that cooling cup of tea. That said... onward, because if it's one thing we all need right now, it's a vacation by a lake.
    Non-Star Wars Penthatlon Entry. :D

    110 Word Hurdle: Jarod's Barrel of Monkeys

    Monkey One was on sentry duty on the railing of the front deck, watching as the sun rose over the serene lake. Life began to stir... in the water and the trees and on the ground.

    Monkey Two was in the kitchen, watching the cooled cup of tea still untouched that had been left, forgotten in the scheme of things.

    Monkey Three was out by the road, unpaved, keeping watch with Monkey Four and Monkey Five. Monkey Six was supervising.

    Monkey Seven was in the bathroom, unnoticed on the counter, hanging off of a cup that held toothbrushes.

    Monkey's Eight, Nine, Ten, Eleven, and Twelve were in the living room.
    Last edited: Jul 4, 2021
    Vek Talis and Mira_Jade like this.
  7. Thumper09

    Thumper09 Force Ghost star 4

    Dec 9, 2001
    Great job! I remember Jarod's Barrel of Monkeys. Glad to see they went on vacation with him too and are helping keep an eye on things. :)

    I'm looking forward to seeing where the rest of the vacation goes with Jarod and Miss Parker in your pentathlon. It's a fascinating way to continue a previous story. :) Great work, and excellent characterization!

    a Broots fan :cool:
    DaenaBenjen42 likes this.
  8. Mira_Jade

    Mira_Jade The (FavoriteTM) Fanfic Mod With the Cape star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Jun 29, 2004
    I said it ten years ago and I'll say it again: this has brought back so many happy nonstalgic memories for me! [face_love]

    To begin, this was such a clever way not to mention the names of your characters while still telling a story. I could feel the setting you built, with all of the monkeys keeping guard.

    This is off to an excellent start, and I look forward to more! =D= [:D]
  9. Vek Talis

    Vek Talis Jedi Master star 3

    Oct 12, 2018
    Good stuff: the Shakespeare, the Barrel of Monkeys, the line "I was going to leave. Quickly." Well done. =D=
  10. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Chosen One star 6

    Aug 21, 2006
    never seen the show but I like the characters
  11. DaenaBenjen42

    DaenaBenjen42 Jedi Grand Master star 5

    May 15, 2005
    Thumper09: Of course they went on Vacay with Jarod... he seemed to take kids toys everywhere, at one point or another. One such memorable instance of it was the Profiler lady getting a bit weirded out by that aspect while standing in one of his lairs. And just as soon as I can write it, fun we will be having. :) Thank you, fellow Broots Fan. :)

    Mira_Jade: I was stuck until I realized... Jarod would have SOMETHING with him to tell an aspect of the story. And then I was puzzled on HOW to go about it. Thank you, Mira. :)

    Vek Talis: Thank you! :)

    Earlybird-obi-wan: Welcome, then, to The Pretender ye who has never seen the awesome show. :) Thank you. :)
    Mira_Jade and Vek Talis like this.
  12. amidalachick

    amidalachick FFoF Hostess Extraordinaire star 5 VIP - Game Host

    Aug 3, 2003
    I've also never seen the show but this was fun to read! I love vacation stories, and can't wait to see how it all turns out. :D
    DaenaBenjen42 likes this.