The return of the feedback junkies: Version 2.0

Hi, my name's Kazzy, and I am a feedback Junkie!

Always. I love the reviews.

A Moment in Time

An AU of the OT, but starting just after ep. III. it involves what would have happened had Padmé not told the Jedi she was pregnant.


Leia picked one and came over to her mother offering it to be smelt. Although Padmé was well aware this particular flower had no scent, she leaned forward to oblige her daughter ? only to rear back in horror as the harmless flower turned out to be a lightsabre. The little girl turned to her brother and calmly watched as the small flower he held spun out to be a blade of his own.


Link in my sig!

 

Hello, my name is solojones, and I am a feeback junkie. Definitely.

Sadly. Positive, negative, whatever. I just find it really hard not to know what people think of your writing one way or another. I don't know how to write something the reader finds to be better without knowing what the reader thinks in the first place.

I'm just going to jump right to the teaser first of all, then I'll continue to ramble This is a bit that's from one of the episodes taking place during the films, in this case, TPM...

Excerpt from In the Shadow of the Chosen: The Obi-Wan Kenobi Saga:

The flames were consuming Qui-Gon?s body at an increasingly quick pace; soon, all that would be left was ash. But his will exerted itself even now. He had wished for Anakin to be trained, and now that wish was going to be fulfilled. Even though Qui-Gon?s body would soon be gone forever, Obi-Wan was sure he had never felt his presence so keenly. Is it his presence? Obi-Wan asked himself silently. Or his absence? But the young Jedi Master could find no answers, only more questions.





***at this point, if you wish to skip the explanation and get to the link and just try out the story on a whim, feel free to. Or read on if you like.

Basically I have poured my heart and soul (and still am, one of those long processes) into trying to make the best possible character piece based on what we know from film canon about Obi-Wan Kenobi. I've tried my best to explain all those transition moments and years that are so key to how his character developes, becasue he's definitely not the same in ROTJ as he was in TPM (and in more ways that just being...dead....).

My goal is to create a character piece which people (probably particularly Obi-Wan fans, but as it gets more into it like now, probably Anakin fans as well) might be able to see as some sort of insight or at least my commentary on the character. This includes (and very much deals with) negative aspects of the character. I in no way wish to have a saintly view of him. That would make for a really boring character, wouldn't it?

I hope that, by this process, not only can I come out with a story that I'll be very proud of (as, so far, I am), but also that I will be able to develope my ideas of the character in his full, three dimentional, dynamic form so that when I write him later, I'll have that in mind. I think it's prompted some readers to think about the character in the same sort of way. There have been some disagreements on things, and I think that's great. That's another reason I need feedback from all types of readers: I need all perspectives on Obi-Wan.

If anyone is interested in this sort of, I'll admit different, but hopefully thought-provoking and interesting piece (it's definitely not boring, I don't think. It's just different), please give it a shot and let me know what you honestly think:

In the Shadow of the Chosen: The Obi-Wan Kenobi Saga


-sj loves kevin spacey

 

Hello, my name is JM, and I am a feedback Junkie!

Written three stories which have been posted here and thus far the number of people responding are 7 for the first, 3 for the second, and 4 for the latest. That?s enough to be encouraging though when I checked I found that there?s only one person who had given me feedback on more than one, and that was actually only on two rather than all three.

So I?m not even building up a readership.

Not that sure why not though. Maybe I need to try ?Romance? and/or ?Humour? instead of ?Drama?

EDIT: Something?s working, up to 7 (+0), 9 (+6), and 6(+2) and got some more people who have read more than one of my stories.

 

I think this is a really cute thread idea.

Hello my name is Rose_Skywalker and i am a feedback junkie. It's an addiction i swear, i'm getting therapy.

this excerpt is from Willful Edge: the story of Meria Tharen

?But this time I did my sweet.? Lykaios snarled and signaled to someone above her. A dozen men clad in all black descended from the rafters encircling Meria and Kyp. She backed up to be on level with Kyp.

?You?re a Jedi. You can take six of them right?? she asked quietly, tossing her red hair over her shoulder. She scanned the area; her ship was to the back of her. A stack of crates to her right, Kyp to her left, Cloud swarming around her ankles barking loudly.

?Shouldn?t be a problem.? He whispered

fight scene then follows

 

Alrighty this thread does NOT need to be on page 3 Hard to find for one thing SO I'm upping along with adding in my latest fic.. and my very first solo attempt at humor.

Qui-Gon and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day



I went to sleep and forgot to set my bedside chrono to wake me up, and when I woke up I tripped over my school bag and by accident I dropped my only clean tunic down the laundry chute so I had to wear a dirty one, and when I put on my boots I discovered they were too small?and I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

 

Hi'ee! My name is JadeDjo and I am a feedback junkie!

My story Life is a Work in Progress sits in obscurity. Its has adventure, it has love, it has OC's. Wait, OC's! Yes OC's. Don't let this deture you though. This particular story is my baby. The one I pay the most attention too. So if you like regular post, please check it out. PLEASE.

Excerpt:

Trent tried to project an air of calm as he paid the bartender and walk
quickly, yet as nonchalantly as possible, out of the bar. When he came out of
the cantina, he had to wait a few seconds for his eyes to adjust to the
brightness of the sun, now high in the sky. By the time his eyes cleared the
women was nearly to the gates of the port. He broke out into a slow trot to
catch her, not quite knowing what he was going to say. It was, however, not
surprising that she did not slow at his calls to stop. Finally he managed to
catch up to her, but only after some humiliating looks from mechanics. She
was a surprisingly fast walker. Coming up behind her, he was going to lay his
hand on her shoulder to get her to stop. Before he could lay on finger on
her, the woman whirled to face him with a very determined look. It appeared
that she was poised in a fighting stance.

"Hey, whoa, hold on I'm not going to hurt you," he said a bit off
guard.

"Then what are you doing following me?" she countered.

"Look, I'm not here to fight you," he said, now on the defensive. "It
just sounded like you were trying to hire one of those pilots in there."

"So, why do you care?!" He could definitely detect the sarcasm in her
voice, which only made him more agitated.

Making sure to keep his voice slow and calm, not to mention keeping the
growl from his reply, he said, "Well since I don't have my charter any more
and it didn't look like you had much luck in the cantina, why don't we just
forget about that whole incident earlier and come to some kind of deal."

"Why?" was her only response.

"What do you mean, 'why'?" he asked exasperated. "Because we need each
other, that's why. So can we can we come to some sort of an agreement or
what?"


Check my sig for my other works. Thank you!

 

Hi, I'm Lt_Jaina_Solo and I'm a feedback junkie!

This teaser is from my latest story, All Things Have Beginnings and Endings

How she wished she was that fearless queen at times like this! Shooting down the invaders, fighting to keep her planet safe from those who are evil- there was nothing that the queen was afraid of. There had been four rulers since then, but it was Queen Amidala who was immortalized, heralded as the leader of the movement that had protected Naboo when the Empire had come into power.

Her hand brushed the boulder she was laying on, and she found herself drawing courage from it. No matter what these monsters did to her in this room, they would be unable to steal that away from her.

Looking over to the slim alien coming at her with various bright colored objects floating in the air around her, Kayla knew she would need every last ounce of bravery she could find.

~LtJS

 

Hello, my name is jacen200015, and I am a feedback Junkie.

I know i have a lot of lurkers and reviewers but i love reviews.


The Rising Tempest


Drengin yelped in fear as he barely scrambled away from the incoming strike. He pulled his lightsaber from his belt and ignited it just in time to block a powerful blow to his side.

Anakin was in the cockpit when he sensed something terribly wrong. Turning around, he left the cockpit and ran down the ramp to see Drengin desperately trying to defend himself against a Sith Master. Without hesitation, the Chosen One ignited his saber and ran forward to help his friend.

Drengin?s lightsaber was wrenched from his grasp by a powerful swipe of Darth Seront?s lightsaber and the young apprentice fell to the ground, defenseless. As he saw the red lightsaber swing down for the killing blow, fear clenched his heart. Paralyzed with terror, his thoughts fled in a flurry as he searched for answers. Why does your friend want to kill me, Master? Why? Is this your doing? What have I done to deserve to die? He squeezed his eyes shut as he felt the burning sensation of the lightsaber at the skin of his arm.

 

Taking a break from pushing the reload buttons on my own fics to up this for the benefit of my fellow junkies...

 

My former apprentice Durhelediel and I are HUGE feedback junkies Be sure to check out our series that we've been working on together Fire and Ice! There's Six stories in the series and Five are completed. The fourth one is now in the stages of being posted Happy Reading! We LIVE For Feedback!


And now -- some teasers! Going to post one from each

Fire and Ice

//What took you so long? //

Kyran huffed as he took his chair from Han'yaie and began to steer him toward the recovery room set up for his and his padawan's use. //You were hard to find, as always,// Kyran scoffed. //Next time, drop a postcard stating 'Hello, I'm on Hoth. Wonderful place to freeze to death. Come visit anytime.'// He gave his friend a long look as they neared the door to the recovery room. //What were you doing, unprotected, on Hoth's surface?//



Fire and Ice: Hindsight


"Lana found this message on your datapad," he said as he handed to his friend.

Qui-Gon clenched his jaw at reading the datapad, then he very calmly got out of bed.

"Qui..." Lana said warningly. "Get back in bed. Now." She glared at him. "You are not allowed to leave this room, my friend, until you have completely recovered. That's another two days. Lay down."




Fire and Ice: Trials



Qui-Gon nodded, wincing at Kyran's news. And the Council expected him to leave his padawan in this condition? His heart rebelled at the idea of leaving him in this vulnerable state. His heart felt as if it would bleed with misery and anger. "I can't stay," he said shortly in an irritated tone. "I'm forbidden to stay at my padawan's side, due to my disobedience. The Council is sending me on a mission."


Fire and Ice: Tainted

"I didn't want to tell you just yet, especially since I have no way to counteract it. But the symptoms he has are not good." Han'yaie ticked the symptoms off on his fingers. "Blood when coughing indicates blood in the lungs, which is never a good sign. Seizures so bad that he can't even call out to you, his master, through the training bond, which is the easiest thing to do for a Jedi. I also sensed his heart beating erratically, slowing and then double-beating. His body is off-balance, but it can't tell me by what because it doesn't know. His cells are dying slowly and individually. Qui-Gon, something is attacking him from the inside, mimicking his own body cells, and he can't fight it. If he progresses like this, he'll be dead within a month?or much, much sooner."

 

My name is Mjsullivan, and I am such a feedback junkie!

And because of my habit of posting rather infrequently, I fear that many of my readers could grow impatient. I am now attempting to rectify that problem!

My story is called Working in Darkness, and it is a monster of an epic. So far, we're halfway through chapter five - and have amassed nearly 100 MSword pages! Here's an excerpt for anyone interested:

Clip Argentsson woke as suddenly and as completely as if someone had yelled in his ear. His heart began pounding, adrenaline coursing through his veins. An inexplicable wave of panic hit him as he sat bolt upright on the unfamiliar cushioned bench. His breath came in short ragged breaths, almost choked off by his cold, tight throat. Reflexively, his hand snatched for a blaster that was not there. Thrown by this anomaly, he leapt off the cushioned bench, and onto legs that did not want to support his weight. He crumpled to the floor, and lay there panting, somehow exhausted.

What, he thought, in the name of the Sith is going on?

*****

 

Hi I'm FairNaberrie (aka darththunderbird) and I am a feedback junkie.

My first story on these boards was a vignette called My Angel is Fallen

Since then I've begun (but abandoned due to the fact that I am not good at writing in present tense 1st person with rotating point of view) a novella called "Intentions of Innocence"

Currently I'm writing (and have all intentions of finishing) a novella called " TheTrials and Tribulations of Courting a Senator " here's a short exerpt..
"You remember our plan, right master?" Although Anakin was past padawanship and beginning his days as a full fledged Jedi knight, Obi-Wan?s title of master stuck, perhaps because Anakin still looked to him as that ? an advisor, friend, brother and father all rolled into one convenient lightsabre-weilding package.


and..( i couldnt resist) "Food!" Anakin said gruffly, his eyes widening at the sight of the meal before him. He reached out to grab some rancor bacon, only to have the tray yanked away and an array of fabric swatches placed in front of him, prompting disappointed whines.

Sola laughed and explained, "Dearest brother-to-be, this is the way it goes from now on. First planning, then food."

Padme then said, "These are the sample fabrics for your tuxedo. I think the blue would?" She began to jabber away with the other women about seasons and other ?completely irrelevant? subjects, leaving Anakin clueless. He reached out for the bacon yet again, but his hand recoiled upon being slapped. The hungry Jedi quickly made a final attempt, seized the bacon, and thrust it in his mouth before any of the women had time to deprive him once more.
"Meanface" he said between swallows.

"Alright, Skywalker," Padme said, "have your food. But today, we?re going shopping!"

 

Hello, my names is VadersMistress and I am a feedback junkie!

I constantly check my stories to see if they have gotten any feedback and I feel if anybody understood it would you all.

Here is an excerpt from my story Big Brother in a GFFA. I can't seem to get the link working so if anybody wants it it is on the 5th page of The Saga.

Xanatos smirked and then raised two fingers behind Yoda?s head, giving him horns. Yoda never twitched but Xanatos soon grabbed the front of his pants and got red in the face. Yoda allowed himself a small smile.

Anakin Skywalker laughed at Xanatos? pain while the other Anakin simply shrugged. Solo wondered what he had done to deserve living with such miscreants.

Yoda smiled and decided it would be best for him to observe at this point rather than to direct. He was interested to see where these younglings would take themselves and if indeed, they managed to form a strong alliance.

Anakin Skywalker clutched his side from laughing and was bent over double. In the middle of a sharp intake of breath he jerked his head up and touched his lips. Yoda looked at him curiously and said, ?In pain you are in??

?No! It is something much, much worse. I forgot to moisturize this morning!? And with that he ran out of the room.

On his way to the bathroom he saw Leia, Mara, Jaina, and Padme huddled together on the couch. He almost went over to kiss his sweetheart hello but realized he had more important things to worry about that moment.

I am co-writing it with my mother and we have a few loyal readers, all of whom I thank immensly, but I would like to recieve more. BTW, I have a nice big bag of Hershey Kisses and Swedish Fish for anybody who reads!! *waves candy in front of everybody's faces*

 

Neat idea for a thread DarthBreezy

Hello my name is J_M_Bulldog and I am a feedback junkie.

I do have a loyal readership but I'd love to get more. I have two stories up on the boards for y'all's enjoyment. Sorry, no candy or anything. Can't afford it

The Other Half of Me

?The pendant is the japor snippet your father gave your mother on the trip to Coruscant. She never took it off except for the last time she was here. The diary is hers. I knew you would want to know more about her so I figured her telling you would be best.?

Luke looked up from the box, tears in his eyes. At the start of this mission he had felt that he would find something more than just Brice and he had. He had found a link to a past he and his sister had desperately wanted to know about. ?Thank you,? he whispered.

KOTOR Redemption's Price

?Medic!? Revan called impatiently as she knelt next to the injured apprentice. With a voice of durasteel and a grip that belied her small frame, the Master informed the pupil of his folly. ?I give the orders, apprentice,? she hissed. ?Not you. Do not think to step past your rank again. Or you'll lose more than just your lower jaw.?

Revan stood as a medical team arrived. She regarded them for a long silent moment before spinning to stare once more out the window. Malak knew what the gesture meant. As far as Revan was concerned, the matter was of no importance and Malak was left to his own devices.

 

Hi, I'm Targeter and I'm a feedback junkie!

Whiskey Lullaby

That's my new songfic, and here's a lil excerpt:

Jaina?s brown eyes widened n shock as they were caught by Jag?s hard green gaze. ?Jag?I-I didn?t realize you were home-?

?Or what?? he asked her sarcastically. ?You wouldn?t be sucking the lips off your Jedi boyfriend here??

She took a few steps towards him, her eyes filled with guilt and pain. ?Jag-?

He raised a hand, cutting her off abruptly. ?Don?t Jaina, just don?t.?

~~

:Targeter:

 

Hi, my name is Aeron_Azzameen and I am a Feedback Junkie.

Evenstar

This story is mainly about the Solo and Skywalker families finding out they had more relatives. Here's a short excerpt:

On the opposite side of the gym, Jacen and Jakobe sat quietly talking.

?Why do they call you ?Strider??? Jacen asked slowly. Jakobe cast a sideways glance at him.

?Who told you that??

?Athena.?

?I bet she did.? Silence fell between. Jakobe thought carefully, contemplating if he should tell this young Jedi his family?s strange history. Sighing, he turned to face Jacen.

?Do you know anything about my family?? Jakobe asked.

?No, not really, besides the fact that your mom is my mom?s sister.?

?See, that is where people get confused.?


I know it's knida a crazy concept, but I'm having a lot of fun writing this story and I would like to know what people's opinions on it are.

Thanks!!

AA1839

P.S- Oh, yeah. I forgot to mention that I am very happy that this board was continued. I know it kind od died out, but I'm happy to see it alive. Keep the good work up!

 

Hello, my name is WanderingJedi and I'm a feedback junkie.

My current project is Dark Forces (linked in my sig; I'm not very good at board formatting), a novelization about Kyle Katarn and Jan Ors investigating the Dark Trooper project. Feedback isn't the only reason I write. I always thought the events of Dark Forces would be more respected with a proper story-telling. (And I'm a Kyle Katarn junkie.) I want to know that I'm not the only one reading my stories, though.

Finally, she slid into the booth across from Kyle. A blaster pistol was already pointed at her head. The familiar outline of the Bryar almost made her bolt; while it was familiar, it was nonetheless frightening.

"Jan?" the familiar deep voice asked.

Jan nodded. "Yeah, it's me, Kyle."

The man leaned forward, Bryar dropping. Light slid across his features, highlighting the dark-haired, clean-shaved mercenary. His rugged features were lightly scarred, but he was unarguably handsome. His shift in movement also shifted his leather jacket, allowing Jan a peak of the grey composite armor vest he wore beneath it. "What are you doing here?"

Jan bit her lip. "We've got a problem," she said quietly. "Mon Mothma sent me here to get you. It's something we think we need you to fix."

 

Hello, my name is amidalachick...and I am a feedback junkie.

My current stories are One Piece At A Time and Skywalker Family Game Night. Links are in my sig and profile.

Excerpt from OPAAT:
Kitster looked around, then grabbed Anakin by the arm and dragged him into a nearby alley. Even though it was deserted, Kitster kept his voice lowered to a near-whisper.

"I was talking to Greedo, and he said Beedo said he found a cave," Kitster said solemnly.

"A cave?" Anakin repeated, keeping his own voice low.

Kitster nodded. "And the best part is...there's treasure."

Excerpt from SFGN:
"Mmmm," Anakin said. "Just look at all that food."

Luke made a face at Leia and ran to catch up. An angry Leia ran after him, intent on revenge.

But both twins forgot their argument as soon as they saw the inside of the store. All three Skywalkers stared transfixed at the junk food displayed on the shelves.

"This is one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen," Anakin said in a hushed voice, his eyes slightly glazed.

Luke and Leia, their own eyes huge, nodded.

As if they were being pulled in by a tractor-beam, they headed over. In a matter of seconds, their arms were full of soda, Cheezie-O's, Sugar-O's, cookies, and other assorted junk food items. Before they knew it, they were through the checkout and outside.

 

Hallo, my name is Melody, and I art feedback junkie... Oh the shame!!





Eh', I like it. Tis fun to be a feedback junkie! It makes me feel all warm an' fuzzy inside. Reviews? I love them!! Criticism? Just remember, cotton candy makes things go down sweeter. Flames? S?MORE TIME!!!


I have three stories, there's Twists of Fate, Hunting, and A Darkened Day. ADD features a few OC's but, I'm actually straightening them out so it's not so bad now! YAY!




Twists of Fate (co-authored with Jacen20015)

?You ruined me!! You ruined me!!? Obi-Wan shrieked, slamming Bruck into the wall over and over and over again. Bruck?s vision grew dark and cloudy as his head met the hard surface of the temple corridor time after time. He wondered dazedly if the wall would be damaged before the back of his skull and then decided it was entirely possible. Obi-Wan continued screeching his rage and Bruck?s mind felt numb from all the pain.

Suddenly it was all gone and Bruck stumbled then fell forward. A dark face swam in front of his face. ?Oh Force,? a deep voice exclaimed, ?Initiate Kenobi, what have you done??

?He ruined me, Master sir?? Bruck had the strangest sensation of spiraling downward into blankness.



Hunting

Sanar?s mocha eyes narrowed, then took on that dangerous gleam that promised pain. ?Find your heart,? she demanded.

Jaina?s face wrinkled momentarily. ?Excuse me??

?Hunt down Zekk; I dare ya,? Sanar taunted.

Jaina?s face bled free of all color. ?I can?t.?

?Scared?? Sanar?s eyes widened. ?A Solo backing down from a bet? now this is unheard of!?





A Darkened Day


"It's the Senate." Luke said, his voice barely recognizable as the pain from the deaths of Mon Mothma, Borsk Fey'lya, and the other members of the Senate crashed down upon him. "Leia is on a rampage. She?s killing members of the Senate."

Mara felt a weak smile cross her face. "At least when she's done there'll be less politicians." Her tone was wry as she watched Luke's face carefully.

Luke turned his head to face hers, their eyes locked. "How can you say that?" His voice was broken, "The Senate is made up of real, living beings. How can you joke about that?"

"Oh, get off your high horse Skywalker." Mara's words were flippant but her tone was not. "Everything dies. It's natural."

 

I am a feedback junkie who is in great distress... for I posted a fic (songfic, actually) and have gotten NOTHING in response for nearly a week. Not even the ever and mightly feared negative comment of doom. I suppose it's the AUness, or the OCness, but I'd really like to at least have some idea of how I did on it. Besides the fact that I am an utter and incurable feedback junkie that is.

This viggie is background for it: All Those Who Take the Sword

From a Clear Blue Sky (to the most excellent, and depressing, song by Pink Floyd that is "Goodbye Blue Sky")

A stream of people stampeded out of one of the tunnels leading into the other side of the city.

Father and son ran as fast as they could, bounding through the streets, tearing the lower edges of their formal robes to shreds in their haste.

The tunnel exit was a swirl of desperate people, all trying to get away from where they'd come from.

 

Hello, my name is Lusa Thul, and I am a feedback junkie. Excert from my fic Dawn Over ENdless Night. Link in my sig!

?I suppose you are wondering why I asked you to come here.? Luke began, considering the best way to say what he needed to. He decided to get straight to the point. ?Zekk, have you ever considered training an apprentice??

To describe Zekk?s expression as ?mildly shocked? would have won the Understatement of the Year Award. ?What?!? The Jedi spluttered. ?I mean, no Master, I hadn?t. Why do you ask?? He sounded nervous, as if he expected Luke to pull out a blaster and shoot him.

 

Hi, my name is SarkaVrae and I'm a feedback junkie!!

I've only recently posted 2 <quite small> viggies, and I can still testify to the great pull of a one-liner comment....it is addictive! And I crave it more and more each day.....

Ok, now that I've got that off my chest, let me encourage you to take a look at & post a comment to either of my viggies. I especially like my most recent one--it's quite different--and here is a slight taste for ya:
********
The need was for full release. Her duties caused great distress at times, and their lives were rife with even darker experiences, so they all craved an alternate reality, a place of escape. That was why the gutted-out slum had been transformed into a meeting ground. That was why she had come. That was why they followed.

And that was the reason her presence and their fellowship were so welcome.

//Stop thinking!// She chided herself. //This is release, not meditation. Feel, don?t think.//

The director of this mayhem had noticed her standing amongst the crowd, and the thudding halted. A wickedly happy grin spread across his face as he hurried to find what they desired.

The quiet was absolute for less than a minute, but it gathered about them so tightly that scarcely a breath could be taken. In that breathless moment, she began.
*******

links are in my bio!

 

Seeing how something to this effect was the point of the Requesting Readers thread, I thought it might be handy if this was back at the top...

 

Hi, my name is Carr, and I am a feedback junkie.

This was a beautiful idea, Breezy.

From Every Day is a Good One:

Jacen carefully set down the datapad before rapidly brushing past Combe, barely stopping before the guards that stood before the door. ?Your Grace, you cannot go after her like this. You have no jurisdiction.?

He turned on his heel, furious. ?I am a Jedi. I don?t need your jurisdiction.?

?Becoming Viceroy will allow you a freedom of movement you cannot enjoy as a Jedi,? Combe warned, and Jacen saw the slight shake of her head she gave to the guards.

He pulled his lightsaber and ignited it, eyes firmly focused on the guards. ?Move, or I will make you move.?

They moved. ?And where do you intend to go, Your Grace?? Combe said, a hint of anger coloring her voice.

Jacen?s eyes flashed darkly at her, and the look on his face would have quelled opposition from all but the most stalwart of men. ?I?m going to find my wife.?

 

Hi all! I'm SabyneAmberle, and I'm a feedback junkie! Not to mention I'm glad to be here...

My first fic is Love's Final Redemption, and here's a bit from the beginning. It's KotOR-era, but enjoyable, no matter how much or how little you know of the era.

**********

Revan strode purposefully toward Bastila, his voice commanding in both tone and volume. ?I am Revan, Dark Lord of the Sith, once more. Bow before me Bastila, my apprentice, my love.? He said.

Bastila obediently sank to one knee, lowering her head. ?My Lord Revan.? She whispered reverently. ?I am your most humble servant. I am yours to command as you see fit??

Revan cut her off gently as he knelt to lift her chin, using his free hand to take hers. ?Rise, my love.? He kissed her hand lovingly as he helped her to her feet. ?We shall not rule the galaxy as Master and Apprentice, but as equals. My sole demand of you is that you rule at my side, as my love and my Dark Lady.?

Bastila?s eyes widened slightly upon hearing his words. She felt tears threaten to overflow as she lovingly entwined her arms around his neck. ?I can think of nothing else that would make me happier.? She whispered brokenly.

Revan smiled. ?Nor I.? he replied, lowering his head to kiss her, his arms holding her close.

**********

Hope to see some of you 'round the boards! Bye for now!