The UK FF Battle Royale

<It turns out that Gav was using his psi powers to make Gittes think he was shooting at him, but turns out it was really a tree. However through the concentration it took for that, CA managed to stab Gav in the rib cage>

 

Is anybody else worried by Gittes' psychopathic tendencies?

<whilst everybody ponders that question, OAC releases a barrage of genetically engineered velociraptors and watches all those in flame retardant suits get ripped to shreds as they can't run in their bulky clothing>

 

<Defuses Soggy's bomb. Then climbs tree and starts throwing ninja star thingys at everyone again>

 

*there is a sudden powerful explosion from the place where Soggy is hiding*

hehehehe
Pity Soggy never noticed that i tied that bomb to her shoelaces....

 

*Unbeknownst to both Poodu and Soggy, their similarly shaped and shaded boxes were switched. Soggy has actually connected her detonator to a tin of tuna salad sandwiches and a raspberry yoghurt whilst Poodu is about to munch up on 2 pounds of C4*

 

Poodu's awak... but it doesn't look like he will be for much longer

<Runs for cover>

<Shouts> Goodness Soggy, how many bombs did you make?

 

*Poodu freezes as he realises everyone is watching him*

Just how many of these similarly shaped and shaded boxes are there??

*Poodu throws his at the watching group and legs it back to his rock*

 

How am I any more psychotic than anyone else here?!

*Straps on 60 Kilos of C4 and runs headlong at Soggy*

Kamikaze attack!

*At last moment, the real Gittes - stadning behind a rock - detonates the dummy and watches as Soggy's body leaves her feet....by about 1500 m and in about 1 second*

MWAHAHAHAHAHA! Bring it on!

 

<starts looking for Poodu's rock from his tree>

 

//sits on a hill nearby watching the fracas

//patting her pet pig

Soon, Arun-pig, soon...

 

-- missing both legs, covered with blood, tuna salad, and raspberry yoghurt, she grabs two logs and begins carving herself some new legs --

 

<Spots some old witch and her pig (LOL Cass) and throws a couple of stars at them but they miss>

Damn my aim is going

 

//projecting the words in Gav's mind...

Not your aim, young man, no weapon can harm me. I'm a sith!

//stroking pet

Be calm little one...

 

<Throws a bomb attached to an ysalimir at The Sith>

 

*walks through the mannic fighting wearing green surgeons robes and an exceptionally long spliff** *

Yup, I'll be the medic guys - you lot just have fun around me.


**Old english word for medical bag.

 

*Uses the Force to throw very large rocks at everyone on the battlefield, saving the last and largest for the Minx and Sith pig.*

 

--ties on her new wooden legs and limps over to Cass, sitting next to Arun-pig --

Here Arun-pig, want some tuna salad or raspberry yoghurt?

 

<throws a star at Soggy but it hits her new wooden leg>

 

DO NOT UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER...OF THE DARKSIDE

//waves hand thus throwing the rocks and ysalamiri off in the opposite direction

//patting Arun-pig

I have my magic. I a more than a Sith...I am a Sith Witch!

 

<OAC feigns injury just so he can be "treated" by toochilled.>

Ah, I love the smell of green, smells like victory.

 

//Arun-pig scoffs the tuna and yogurt

You pig!

 

<starps an ysalimir onto his shoulders and sets up several counter spells just in case and suns after CA>

Die!!!

 

-- pulls out the star and throws it back at Gav Daragon, hitting him in the back of the head --

 

*Marvels at Soggy's ingenuity*

Were in you 'Nam too?!

*Pops over to TC and borrows heavily from the 'surgeon's bag'. Decides to sit down for a bit*

Why can't we all just get along?

*Pulls out wickedly curved Scimitar and hurls it at Arun-pig*

Have that you flatulent porker!

 

//the scimitar bounces off Arun-pig's head

WHO DARES ATTACK MY PIG

//booming voice