The Ultra Stressed Jedi Students, Part IV

Wow... Very powerful, Derisa.

That reminds me of a quote from a play I had to read this year: Everyone has either too little or too much time, but when you die, your life is complete in that instant, perfect in its length.

 

Uppers.

 

Wow! Thanks, everybody, for being so supportive! I was really proud of that post.

I hope you like this one as much. Sorry about the lateness, I hope the wait is worth it.


*Derisa*

---

The door hissed open and at the other end of the hall, Meri froze, her eyes wide with sudden trepidation. She turned her head and peered down the hall, and caught sight of a familiar silhouette stepping gracefully through the door. ?Meri?? came her Master?s voice. Her heart frozen in her chest, the young woman couldn?t breathe... was it really him? Did he remember her? Did he remember... everything?

When he stepped into the light, her breath shuddered from her audibly, and her knees nearly gave way. She could see something in his clear blue eyes, something she recognized...

?Meri!? He was at her side, catching her as she sagged back, fighting the feelings that roiled through her. She was safe. He was there, at last.

- - -

Alex gently lowered the unconscious girl to the floor, and shaped her limp form into a recovery position, whipping off his robe to pillow her head. He checked her pulse, it was a little fast, but fairly strong: she would be alright. [i]She hasn?t been eating,[/i] he noted, and didn?t question how he could tell, [i] It?s low blood sugar, and an emotional shock... I should have commed before I came up...[/i]

He settled onto his haunches, waiting for her to come around. He smoothed a tendril of hair back from her brow, a habitual gesture he didn?t care to trace back, knowing he?d only find that same blank wall. His hand tucked the tress behind her ear and encountered the thin pattern of her Padawan braid. He pulled it free from where it had become trapped in her collar and laid it flat against the fabric of her tunic, smoothing it with a careful thumb. He could tell by the few escaping curly wisps that some of his own coarser sable was tied in with her own straighter, finer dark hair.

His apprentice. His student, his responsibility. [i]Meri.[/i] As he sounded her name in his mind there was a deep twinge of... something, a sense of many layers of feeling and meaning to her simple name. He searched after it, but shook his head when no answers came.

After a relatively short pause, her eyelids fluttered and opened, and he was staring into deep, mossy brown pools. ?Alex?? she asked, her voice soft and questioning.

He bent his head towards her as he answered her. ?Padawan.?

She struggled upright and bowed her head in a semblance of a proper gesture of respect, but her eyes were pinched shut, tight, as though she were blocking out a sight that gave her intense pain. ?M... Master,? she acknowledged, but the word seemed wrenched out of her. She wouldn?t meet his eyes again.

Alex sucked in a breath, and felt the wind of the Force at his back, buoying him up. ?Meri. I... we have much to talk on.? He rose in a fluid motion and held a hand out to her to help her to her feet. her eyes flashed to his in surprise, but as quickly, she turned away and pushed herself off the floor. Alex felt his forehead lower into a frown as he felt her rejection, but he schooled his thoughts and stepped away from her. He headed back down the hall to the entry to the lounge.

He paused in the doorway, and surveyed the room. The couches were a soft blue, and looked very comfortable, high seats deep with cushioning. The walls bore a few flat holos, one a seascape with high clouds scudding serenely past, and the other a more abstract rendering, sweeps of deep dark blues accented by a sharp slice of a vibrant yellow. They gave the room a tranquil but open feeling, an unseen current of movement underlying the whole. He wasn?t sure if he liked it.

Turning to his Padawan, Alex gestured to the nearest seat in a clear invitation. Meri moved past him and perched nervously on the farthest piece of furniture, and Alex cocked his head, trying to figure out if it was a token of defiance, or a symptom of some fearfulness in her. He took the nearest seat to her, and composed himself to begin. She surprised him by speak

 

Most interesting. Pretty good post, Derisa.

 

Yes, I concur with JKOW. I especially like the last part of the last sentence, about many questions unasked and unanswered... *shivers* Isn't that so true in every day life...

 

Sorry, triple post, it said it wasn't posted and there was an error... Grrrr...

 

Nothing to see here. Move along, move along.

 

Um, UP!

 

Wow, I almost missed this! Very nice! So Alex and Meri are back together, in a manner of speaking. I liked the way he requested rapport in the Force with his hands, one up and one down.

Meri must have a lot of trust in him, knowing that he doesn't remember her at all. They can't sit back and reminisce about their missions together, or talk about the funny things the exchange students did, and he wouldn't even know how good or bad she is with a lightsaber, or Force manipulation, or anything! An awkward situation!

 

Oh I don't know if you could say that she was very trusting. She didn't let him very far, I don't think. After all she knew that forming some sort of elementary bond was necessary and expected of her. And even though she may not admit it to herself, she is probably missing his presence in her mind and doing this thing is a way to capture it, if only in the smallest way. Though I think she'll soon find out it's not the same at all.

Initially she probably only allowed it in thinking maybe he would remember her in the long run.

Anyways...I'm babbling again...

 

This is very good, I wonder why I never found this before! Keep it up!

~ Jay

 

Babble away, JKOW, it's very interesting and insightful!

Welcome, Azeria Jade. And the reason you never found this before is that people only rarely post to it anymore. Derisa Ollamhin is just tying up a few loose ends to bring the saga to a close. But read and enjoy nonetheless.

 

A new reader!!!???!!!

Holy cow: how long has it been since we've seen one of those? Jay, I'm sure we could post up the links to the original stories if you are interested, or you can wait till I have the archive site approved and accessible...

Thanks for the insightful reply, JKOW! I'm glad to see we're on the same page about Meri's level of trust, and her emotional state. (BTW, I've really been enjoying the stuff in LAWR, when I get the chance to just sit back and read along! You are a master of juicy romance!)

Well, here's the next post: I'd meant to have this one in yesterday, but considering the responses, I'm glad I waited.

*Derisa*

---

Perrian Thenceor paced near the door of the arena that had been assigned to the evening?s events. He nodded a greeting to two newcomers, and then resumed his frustrated striding back and forth. Another late arrival, clad in the pristine robes of someone soon to be a Knight appeared at the door.

Rani paused by the door and perused the room, quickly spotting the other candidate, but missing the one who was supposed to reaffirm his vows to the Order.?Where?s Alex?? she asked.

?I don?t know,? Perrian replied. ?I?ve been comming him for a half hour. There?s been no answer.?

?Well, he?ll make it eventually,? Rani reassured the Knight, and Perrian smiled.

?Yes, I suppose. He was late for his first Knighting too.?

They shared a grin at the memory, and Rani stepped into the room, to be swarmed by her friends, led by T?lor, who was obviously eager to welcome her into the service of the Order to which they?d been destined since small children.

?It?s a good thing they?re doing the Knightings first,? T?lor commented wryly, noting Alex?s absence.

?I wanted him to be here for it, though,? Rani replied, as they moved closer to the centre of the chamber where the Council waited.

?He will be, Rani,? T?lor answered. ?They aren?t ready to start quite yet. Oh look, here comes Kit?!?

The three young women embraced, and Kithera ran a hand over Rani?s newly cut hair, where late her Padawan braid had hung. Rani dropped her eyes before her friend?s questioning gaze, ?He is free now, Kit?.? T?lor pulled Kithera away for a few seconds to explain, which freed Rani to meet K?vel Kaelson?s eyes, across the half-circle formed by the Council members. His Padawan braid still hung complete over his left shoulder, bound with strands of red and green thread. The private ceremony of cutting it would give Alex Arieh a few more minutes to arrive.

Rani allowed the question to cross her mind [i]What if he didn?t show up?[/i] It was a possibility. She knew he?d gone to speak with Meri after leaving the infirmary after their final Trial. Meri might have told him how she felt, or shared with him some of what she?d gone through... could he have elected not to go through with his reaffirmation to the Order, or to her as his Padawan, in order to allow them to be together?

Then she recalled Meri?s trepidation when she?d found out that Rani knew, and she shook her head. It was very doubtful the young woman would ever tell Alex what had been between them, Rani realised. She would likely just let things develop as they would without pushing him in any direction. If their love was favoured or desired by the Force, then it would grow again, and if it was never to be...

She recalled the depth of feeling she?d found for the young Master?s Padawan, hidden away in Alex?s heart, and she wondered what changes the Sith-Witch?s mindwipe had wrought. Could love be abolished by tampering with someone?s memories, or would some trace of it always remain, lingering on to haunt them? Rani dropped lids over eyes suddenly dry and painful with tears that wouldn?t come. Her new resolve over these past few days had served to dull the intensity of her own feelings for the sable-haired Jedi, but she knew she?d always care deeply for him.

Obi-Wan and Willis brushed past her, congratulating her on the way to shaking K?vel?s hand, and Rani watched, a strange sense of detachment growing in her

 

Hmm, I wonder what reason Alex had to be late for his first knighting ceremony! And why is Rani wondering if all traces of Alex's love for Meri had been erased, or if something would linger on to haunt him? Is she hoping that it's gone and he might turn to her now? A very thought-provoking post.

 

Glad you found it so, Jane. As to Alex being late for his first Knighting, oh he was likely rescuing a kitten froma a tree or some such random act of heroism!

Here's the next piece, not many left now. Next on Tuesday!

*Derisa*

---

Dani clutched her Padawan?s tiny hand in hers tightly, sensing the little girl?s confusion and fear as she felt the wave of sorrow rolling out of the cinamon-haired young man who knelt at his Master?s feet.

[i]But why?[/i] she heard the pained question in her mind, [i]Why do they need to cut their bond?[i] Ali asked her Master.

Dani smoothed the child?s hair, savouring its silken texture and the wonderful fineness of childhood. Her answer was a series of images she had first experienced with her own Master, and he from his, and so on down the long years of history, Master to Padawan, answering this very understandable fear. As she shared them, Dani lived both sides of these memories made so long ago, but unlike her first time, she was less the subject of the memories, and more the viewer.

[i]-an infant, taking its first steps, joy and concentration sharing its round face, its chubby hand soft in the memory, and tight on the hand that heldd it, and helped it along, this first of life?s journeys...

-an awkward child balancing on the stone rail of a small flight of stairs, holding tightly to a much larger hand, and then gradually pulling free, triumph clear on her smiling face...

-a teenaged girl frowning over some task, but refusing the offer of help, only to turn and flash a look of such sudden success when the task is completed without aid...

- a young woman kneeling at her Master?s feet, trust and understanding writ clear in her unsmiling eyes, but the truth of her joy and triumph shining forth in her eyes as the shears close over her braid and the small sharp cut is made in her mind and heart...

-a pair of hand lifting a bird to the heavens, and releasing it. The claws are sharp on the sensitive fingers, but the bird stretches wings wide, and then with a sighing of wings, launches itself and flies, free.[/i]

Ali looked up at her Master, her bright eyes gleaming with understanding, and her grip on Dani?s hand tightened marginally, but then loosened, a silent signal.

The pair watched the rest of the ceremony in shared silence, both feeling the bond that lay between them growing with the experience.

- - -

?Will you now take Oath with this Order, to serve as a Jedi Knight, to protect peace and justice within the Galaxy, as the Force is your ally?

?Yes, Masters. I would be Knighted,? the young man spoke surely, his deep voice rising to carry out over the assembled crowd of Jedi. When the ritual question was asked, he gave the expected response.

?Then rise, K?vel Kaelson, Knight of the Jedi, and take your rightful place among your peers.?

As K?vel moved to take his new place at his master?s side, now her equal in rank within the Order, her smile reminded him that he need not bow, but he offered a tempered nod of recognition, a silent gesture of thanks for all the lessons over the long years on the path to this day. Kirstan?s answer was a smile that shone straight from her eyes: clear pride and joy in her student having achieved this goal.

K?vel was still flying high above the Temple on wings of elation and realization. All he had ever aimed for, all he had worked so hard all his short life for was now his: K?vel Kaelson was a Jedi Knight.

He savoured this thought, and then ducked his head in an acknowledgement that this was just the beginning: the Jedi mandate was clear, and he had his work cut out for him, as did every member of the Order, Knight or no.

This thought reminded him of one of those who was neither Knight, nor really Jedi, yet closer to his own heart than any who were either. K?vel peered across the small half-circle of Jedi, to catch a pair of familiar eyes, and his smile broadened in response to the hesitant curve of Jane?s lips. He smiled back, and touched her ever so lightly over their bond. He was glad he had n

 

Aww, those examples of independence were so sweet. And K'vel's finally a knight now. Wonderful! *happy sigh* But what's this? Rani's answer was not the one that was expected? Can't wait to read more!

 

Derisa,

what a great set of posts! i had my appendix out last tuesday and haven't been able to read much on-line! What a great treat to come back to...

what a shame it is almost over!!!

 

Hey, juwanna, we were worried! Glad you're okay. Appendix out: yuck! You *are* alright, right? Best wishes for a speedy recovery, lady!

Oookay, here's the next piece, only three left to go. Enjoy!


*Derisa*

---

The sand was warm under her knees, and the presence of the witnesses to this long-awaited day was a radiant heat at her back. The high Masters of the Jedi Council, they who led by shining example were ranged in front of her in a ragged half-circle, all but two towering over her. The nearest figure, his robes a paler contrast to the swirl of dark fabrics behind him, gave a grave nod of his gnomish head. Tufts of white hair floated gently with the movement of his head, and Rani looked straight across the small space between them, meeting eyes of a bright warm green.

The diminutive Master raised his free hand over her head in the ancient and symbolic gesture. ?Come before us, you have, Padawan, to accept from our hands the accolade. Who speaks on your behalf??

?I speak for her,? came Gi?den D?way?s expressive voice. ?Though I am not the one to whom she was apprenticed, I have seen her growth and developement, and the sometimes hard lessons she has learned upon this path. She has grown in wisdom, in understanding, and in obedience to the will of the Force.? Rani lowered her head, letting Gi?den?s honest praise wash over her like an updraft from a familiar hearthfire, warming her to her very core. Humbled by his words she waited for him to finish with his ritual part in her ceremony. ?I would be proud to welcome her into the ranks of the Jedi.?

Yoda acknowledged, his expression grave, but something merry glinting in the back of his eyes, ?Satisfied we are that she has learned all that is necessary. Succeeded she has in her Trials, and earned this distinction she has.?

There was a gentle indrawing of breath from those assembled, as the next phase of the ritual began. Every candidate had the right to choose among the many ceremonies possible for theri fated day, their acceptance into the ranks of the Galaxy?s protectors of peace and justice. Even as her best friend had chosen a unique gesture to seal her destiny as a Knight of the Jedi, swearing her Oath upon the ?sabre of her Master, so Rani had chosen some gesture to make her ceremony unique.

She swore her Oath, feeling the fervour of her commitment burn through her words. She felt like a weapon, newly forged by the immense, unmeasurable heat of the Force, hammered and tempered like some ancient sword, and now ready to be dedicated to her purpose. She inhaled, almost scalded by the deep energy that carried her with it.

?Your wish to be Knighted, it is?? creaked the voice of the Temple?s oldest Master, and Rani?s eyes, brimful of the rapture of the Force, snapped open to meet the Whill?s.

Yoda?s eyes glowed with such wisdom, as though they embodied the lessons of tranquility and serenity of every green growing thing in the Galaxy.

?The will of the Force, Master,? she breathed, and Yoda?s naked brow curled up momentarily in gratification: this Padawan had indeed come very far of late.

?By what name would you be known?? he asked quietly, and Rani drew another breath, holding to her resolve. She had not discussed this decision with anyone, knowing only that the Force had shown her the rightness of it.

Her heart spoke louder than her voice, to all those assembled: ?As he was a father to me, his name should live on. I would be Knighted by the name Rani Veko-Kern.?

The palpable wave of surprise that rolled from those assembled was followed almost immediately bya similar one of deep understanding, of accord that her gesture was a right and fitting tribute to a Master slain. She had done some justice to his memory.

- - -

When she had been greeted by her peers, those who had not yet passed their Trials came forward to offer their congratulation to the new Knights. Obi-Wan bowed his head before the young woman, a single tear shining in one expressive teal eye.

?Rani- I mean, Knight Veko-Kern... I just wanted to say ho

 

Wow, that was powerful. Taking her master's name ... what better way to remember him?

Yes, Obi-Wan's come a long way since the beginning of this fic ...

 

yes, derisa, i am doing well... just don't make me laugh too hard.. or run...


Sniff. What a perfect way to honor her master. You are really quite creative... I like that!

 

Slan, guys! I am working on the next post, but I've also been putting in the hours on the Archives, and am almost ready to link up the draft pages for the approval of the past and present authors...

In prep, I've started a discussion thread in the Writer's Forum... I'd love to see you all over there, to lay plans for the future of the USJS, as well discussing what we're doing with the material we already have.

I'll be sending PMs or emails to all the authors I can find, rooting through the old threads to find them, but I may not have them all, so anyone who has *more than the name* of past authors, please let me know, or invite them yourself. Everyone's input is more than welcome, it's necessary!

Head on over to the thread in the Writer's Resource forum, and post away! See you there!


*Derisa*

 

Hey everybody, here's the next piece: nice and long for you! Enjoy!


*Derisa*

---

Alex Arieh congratulated his friend, noting for the first time a bizarre overlay of his senses. It was as though he were seeing from two subtly different pairs of eyes, perceiving the events around him from separate but similar points of view. He tried to separate them, tried to see Rani or T?lor from only one point of view, to draw the memory images closer to the present ones, but it proved too difficult. His glance shot to his apprentice, and all of a sudden, one of those perspectives was removed. He repeated her name mentally, turning it into a mantra so that he would not forget her again: [i]Meri Irhanah, Meri Irhanah...[/i]


When things in the arena had calmed somewhat, he was beckoned forward by the stubby green finger of the Council?s eldest and wisest. He stood before the assembled Jedi Council, meeting each of their eyes in turn. He resisted the urge to kneel, for he was not a Padawan about to be Knighted: he was a Knight and Master, reconfirming his dedication to the Jedi Order, and to his apprentice.

She was a warm presence at his side, her name a quiet song in his mind. He stood before the Council, and focused his gaze down on the most senior member of the Order. He was somewhat startled to catch a glimpse of some fleeting emotion in the Jedi Master?s jade gaze, like the silver flash of a fish under green water.

[i] Pity?[/i]

Yoda?s eyes closed, and when they opened again all such traces were gone, freed to swim in the channels of the unifying Force. It was all the answer he would give.

The affirmation proceeded, the young Exemplar the Council had spoken to about researching such ceremonies had been thorough, and it went smoothly. It wasn?t until Meri stood before him and locked her eyes with his, that Alex felt again somewhat disjointed. There was such intensity in that dark gaze, such hidden depths that Alex felt himself drawn in, almost magnetically. He pulled back out of respect for his newly affirmed status as her Master, blinking to regather his thoughts and watched as she looked away in a graceful movement and tight control.

For all that she was his Padawan, he felt he might never [i]know[/i] this enigmatic young woman. They spoke the words, renewing an Oath that had been made before, and then ripped from his memory.

When her eyes met his again, he felt a cold stab in the realms hidden under the white fog of his amnesia: there was something dying in her eyes, some familiar and necessary light fading. Too soon, it was gone as though it had never been.

[i]Hope.[/i]

His mind?s eye saw the image of a slim form collapsed at the feet of the Sith Witch, and his heart was filled with that same need for justice to be done.

He felt swollen with curious, half-identifiable emotions, and it was with a pang of regret for reasons he could not identify, that he released them to the Force. They rushed forth from him, superheated air from a vent, and he was left feeling cleansed, but also strangely empty, as if he were a hollow shell of what he had been before.

- - -

Perrian watched the reaffirmation with a mild curiosity, gratified that Alex had arrived in time to at least witness the second Knighting, but he had many other thoughts on his mind. He was awaiting the right moment to step forward and speak with the Council, and when Alex and Meri moved out into the circle of friends welcoming them in celebration, he saw his opportunity.

Apparently, he was not the only one. Before the Council had had time to disperse, they were approached by a group of four Jedi: all those who had spoken with him about keeping certain of the students on once the exchange programme ended. they were led by the dimunitive form of the Mind-Healer, but she stepped out of the others? way, allowing the youngest among them to speak first. Perrian manuevered through the crowd to present himself with the others, and saw Qui-Gon approaching the same way.

?The decision of the Council is firm, Knight Slayne,? Plo K

 

Grrrrr. Tanj!

Cursed heavy thread won't rise! Up with you, now!


*Derisa*

 

Yes! That last line was hilarious and typically Jane! More than enough experience! I also liked the subtle mention of the 'other factors' and the significant glance that Qui-Gon exchanged with Yoda.

Oooh, the tension is building. Will they be allowed to stay? Will the Council hear the voice of the Force or will they act politically?

 

Chilling forshadowing there dealing with Meri's future. I like.

Great post! I don't suppose I'll get to see the last two before I leave?

Begging...