Games Things EU characters would NEVER say (humor)

Han on Hoth: Anyone for a snow cone?

Chewie to Han: Well I say good man, where are my pants?

Luke's Lawyer to Vader (after big revile): So you are being sued for back
child support, and emotional damage....

 

Daala: I'm the head of the Han Solo fan club, Maw chapter. He's so dreamy...

Thrawn: Museums are so boring. Let's go clubbing!

Any noghri ever: What's past is past! Who cares about what happened before?

 

random Vong: I don't know, cutting is soooo Emo

 

Corran Horn: You know this one time at CorSec ... Nah, it's a pretty dull story.

 

Any X-wing pilot: A-wings are so cool! I wish I could go that fast...

Any A-wing pilot: X-wings are so cool! Maneuverability beats speed any day!

 

Wes Janson: You know I think I'm ready to settle down.

 

Face: I'm really a terrible actor; it was Imperial PR that did all the work!

Ton Phanan: I love water! It's the greatest beverage of all time!

Wes Janson: Geez, Wedge, would you grow up for once? That funny-guy act is really getting old.

(Okay, so Wes might say that. But not seriously!)

 

Palpatine: Ancient Spirits of Evil, transform this decayed form into Mumm-Ra the Ever Living!

Vader to Luke: Remember who you are. You are my son, and the one true king. Remember...

Leah to Han: You miserable slug! You think you can talk your way out of this? You betrayed me.

Obi-wan to Han: I didn't know you could fly.
Han to Obi-wan: Fly, yes. Land, no.

Palpatine to Vader end of Ep III: It's alive...It's alive

 

HAHA, good one!!!!!!!!!!

 

Kell Tainer: I hate explosions.

 

Palpatine to Vader, before the Battle of Yavin: Are you kidding me? Yavin Four has a deep history in the Dark Side of the Force! And you want to destroy it? Pull out now!

 

C-3PO in the face of danger, "CHAAAAAAAAAARGE!"

 

Hobbie Klivian: I have a good feeling about this.

 

Bastilla: "...And if you think you're going to...wait! I don't believe this! You're Reven...I mean...one of the soilders from the Republic..."

 

HAHA, good one!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

R2-D2: talking

 

Storm Trooper to Storm Trooper: Endor....I don't know they have those nasty little Ewoks don't they?

Yoda to Luke: Their is another.......Skyyyy Scrapper.......

Luke to Vader (on the way to the death star): So um....how do you go to the refresher?

Random Imperial: So the reward of father of the year goes to........Darth Vader? Wait....he's a father? Where's his son been, did he even know he had a son.....(Force Choked to death by Vader)

Vader to Random Captain: Congratulations Admiral, do not fail me....
Random Admiral (Captain): Yessss!!!

Padma to Vader (after being Force Choked): Oh No you didn't!!!

Palpatine to Luke: Now witness the fire power of this fully functional Death Star...Fire when ready!
Vader to Palpatine: Um sir.....that's the self destruct button....
Palpatine to Vader/Luke: Bantha....

Darth Maul to Count Doku:....wait you replaced ME? That's....No, Just No!

JarJar to Palpatine: Messa Jarjar binks, Messa Love you, Messa Hug you
Palpatine to Troopers: Oh Force, what have I done...kill him, Kill him now!

Master Yoda to Palpatine: Um...nice face...are we related?

 

Palpy: I'm thinking of growing a mustache. What do you think, Vader?

Ackbar(walks into farm store): Where do you keep your traps?

Ackbar: It's a trap!
Wedge: But dude ... beer!

Edit:

Vader: I see you are wearing your brown pants, captain. Good.

Shimmra: Where the hells have you two been for the past few months?
Harrar: Running some heavy duty raids with my guild.
Shimmra: Huh?
Nom Anor: The new World of Warcrack expansion sucked him in.
Harrar: Says the level 63 Warlock ...

 

Bossk: "I actually like Wookies!"

Tyber Zann: "I'm wanna go straight."

 

Mara: I sleep with a pink and purple Ewok

 

Wedge: She's cute.
Ackbar: It's a trap!

Bel Iblis: Why the hell am I named after the devil?

 

Tenel Ka : "Oh, Jacen your SSOO cute!"

Jag : " you know jaina your right family IS more important than duty."

 

Palpatine: Now witness the full power of this fully functional battle station....it completly loaded and even has leather seats....
Exar Kun: I don't know the last one you sold me was a bit old.....

Vader: Luke, I am your father...
Obi-wan: No Luke, I am your father...
Yoda: Um, Father am I...
Palpatine: Well aren't you special...
Luke: NOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooo

Han to Luke: Wanna take her for a test drive?

 

I don't know which would be less likely to happen, "her" referring to Leia or the Falcon.

 

It'd go in this order of most unlikely to happen
1. Falcon
2. Jaina
3. Leia