Ultimate Author Excuses: Add Yours !

The Empire is jamming all my internet connections!

Most of the time it's Darth Real Life for me:

Darth Work (that annoying time between feeding the plot bunnies... )

Darth Phoneline (yes, I have dial-up... )

And sometimes when I forget to feed the plot bunnies, they run away.

 

The awards ate all my writing creativity. (Sadly, has been my excuse for about three months now. Thankfully I have most of the story written in reserves. )

 

I'm still facing charges in the disappearance of the last person who bugged me for an update.

 

I want to use that one!

 

So that's why you haven't updated In the Service of the Order

 

Got attacked by a Plot Jack Rabbit: it flashed, and then ran away really really fast.

 

I have a family, and they want me to spend time with them.

j/k

My biggest excuse would be....

It's hard to write when your boss keeps looking over your shoulder.

 

I like that last one!

I watched TPM to help me with characterization. (sure, I did...)

Okay, lady. Step away from that Pause button. I think Qui-Gon's starting to feel a little violated.


One of my favorite excuses for anything:

I haven't had my coffee yet.

I haven't had enough coffee yet.

There wasn't enough sugar in the last coffee.

There wasn't enough coffee in the last coffee.

We're out of filters, and the machine's broken, and I can't do anything now.

I was costuming.

I was grocery shopping.

 

I stayed up too late replying to all my PMs. I?m too tired to write.

My computer was struck by lightning.

My dog was struck by lightning.

I was struck by lightning.

Who are you? Who am I? I bumped my head on the side of this computer desk and now I can?t even remember my own name, much less this supposed fan fiction you speak of.

Hey! Look! What?s that over there? *runs away*

 

What's fan fiction?

The wookiee (missus) caught me writing a racy Padmé story and is threatening my nethers with a blade.

I decided I was above it all and have moved on to ghostwrite the next Barbara Cartland novel.

I'm married to the sea.

 

I had two major surgeries in one month(hernia and a clean up of an appendectomy from last spring) and strep throat, and the doctors overprescribed the pain medication.

This really isn't an excuse, it actually happened!

 

I got a life. ( shame face )

 

Okay, that's my favorite

 

Oh man, I really meant to post my excuses, guys, but I've been swamped lately with all this... you know, stuff... And then I finally sat down to write my excuses, but I had a sudden family emergency. Then the person who was going to beta my post about excuses didn't log on for a couple months and I really lost the drive to make any excuses at all for a while. I was being responsible all over the place. Anyway, I finally typed up this good, long list of excuses, and my computer crashed. Yeah, I know...

Ooh, I'd finish this story, but I've got a... thing. Gotta go. Will post later.

The_Face

EDIT: And then I accidentally posted under a sock... [face_doh]

 

* Eh...Oops!

* DRL have been eating me alive for the past two month and I?m so tired that I can hardly keep my eyes opened (yeah sure, I have been on summer vacation for the past 10 weeks and I?ve been asleep until 2pm)

* ?I?ve been looking and looking for plots for this fic but did I found one, no, of course not, although, I was attacked by plot-bunnies for 16 other stories? (that one is true )

* I?m sorry, I?m so sorry, I haven?t updated this in a while, but it?s not my fault, it?s?eh?eh?okay, so I don?t know whose fault it is, but I swear that it?s not mine. (add some "real" tears to that and it might work )

 

My family keeps expecting meals, clean clothes and toliet paper on the roll. I'm trying to break them of these annoying habits.

 

I'm a sock. I got lost in the laundry.

 

lovely excuses.




It's THAT time, don't mess with my and my mighty PMS.

::attacks stores of chocolate like an angry voxyn::

Chocolate!! Chocolate!! Or the Plotbunny gets it!!

 

Nope, Jade, that's what the frame-by-frame button is for.

 

Broken or 'borken?'



How about: "The dog ate my keyboard!"

 

My computer ate my fanfic.

 

Oh my Leona! Sorry to laugh, but that's funny!!!

I watched TPM to help me with characterization. (sure, I did...)



Now there's an idea...

 

I've been job searching because my career as a tapdancing dog jugglar hasn't taken off yet.

My tv held me hostage because it decided i wasn't watching enough of it.

Freak hair dye accident.

 

I wanted this chapter to be so special you all had to start your reviews with "Worth the Wait!"

or

My carpel-tunnel flared up again.

or

*shrug*

or

It was "Tax-Free' weekend in Massachusetts! I had to buy something!