Saga ~ Who I am ~ - Dear Diary Challenge 2007, COMPLETED 12/21

I can hardly wait for his confrontation w/ Kees. Great update, MsLanna.

 

So I went back to Tatooine, so what?
It's not as if I came back to - well, make certain of things. I did fly over the old sarlacc pity, admitted, but I took measurements of the new formations in the dunes. According to those, the beast must have been pretty big. Even with the most dells already filled with new sand by now, the dimensions of the changes is incredible. Where the sarlacc's extensions had rotted away, new ditches had appeared, and they crisscrossed the sand miles around the actual pit.

I didn't say ANYTHING.

Loved the update!

 

Thank you, Tatooine_Ghost. I'm sorry to say that the posts might become more spaced out, otherwise I'd drop out of the competition. If I can scrounge up a little more story to put in, I'll do so.

Heh, Alexis, the confrontation is scheduled for - December. But it's gonna go boom! (I hope.)

Yes, Vadey, I could hear you say nothing loud and clear.

---

[u]Entry 40[/u]

The hardest lesson to learn is that sometimes there is no hope. And I know I should have learned long ago. Maybe I didn't want to see, no, I know I didn't want to. I tried though.
The rebellion has claimed Coruscant, founded a new republic and they have heroes - and a princess.

Remembering what I had written him in my last report, I pulled a lot of strings. Newly elected heads of state have a lot on their agenda without being responsible for madmen. Officially mad madmen, that is. But I managed to get the Princess and some rebel heroes into the mad house and 'free' him. Public relations will make people do strange and senseless things.

though I did not dare interfere directly, I stayed close by and watched. They came, they found him and they were ready to take him along. It was all as good as it could be. But Sinar didn't get it. He stayed in his own universe and his babbling about the last of Grand Admirals that was still out there and planning the destruction of the rebellion in general and him in special got on everybody's nerves soon. And who'd believe the ramblings of a madman about an alien Grand Admiral anyway, when everybody just knows how anti-alien the Empire was.

I wondered how and why Sinar had changed his paranoia, why and when he had replaced the Emperor with that Grand Admiral, and of course, how come he knows? That the rebels don't know and don't even consider it is no surprise. So he's back. back in the hospital, back in his old room, back with his broken toys and gadgets. He swears that the glowing eyes of that Grand Admiral follow him in the darkness and that his new enemy is guarded by deadly grey shadows. They increased his dose of medication.

And I wonder, wonder where he gets his information from, which if his toys is actually working, or if it is just the mischievous joke of somebody in the remnant of Imperial intelligence. Hiding the truth in plain sight can be an effective tool. And who'd ever know? So I went to see him.

Sinar did recognise me, when I came to his room. It had taken some persuasion of the nurses, but the whole staff seems to have been replaced after the fall of the Empire, I did not recognize anybody. And none of the inhabitants recognised me. The empress was holding court in the common room as I passed, everything was just the same. only that everybody looked a little older. Did I, too?

When I entered, Sinar looked up shortly from the gadget he was putting together. I recognized a hair dryer, bits of a till and a broken pad.

"I'm back," I said.

"Did you get them?"

"I found out who it was, and revenge is planned."

Sinar nodded. "Planning is important. Without a good plan, you have no chance."

"What about you?" I asked. "Now that the Emperor is dead."

Sinar looked thoughtful for a moment, then he shook his head slowly. "The Emperor may be dead, but his minions are not. There is a Grand Amiral, he's pretty sneaky, manipulative. Most people even believe he does not exist. If that is not a stroke of genius." He looked at me. "Be happy, you found the culprit and are able to hunt him down."

It was incredible. If I had not seen that Admiral for myself, I would have thought him as mad as everybody else. "And the rebels with Organa? Don't you think they can help you?"

He shook his head. "They mean well, but they have too much on their hands. And as governments are, something always leaks. You have no idea about the intelligence hidden in the palace. No, it is not safe for me." Putting down his tools, he began to search a heap of debris.

"But I can help myself. I always have and I never got caught. I

 

wow. cool. loved it. can not wait for the next part of the story.

 

Wow, spooky how Sinar knows about Thrawn!

Great update. I so cannot wait until December!

 

The mysterios object now lies on my table as I stare at it. For a pendant it is huge, also, one of the sun beams is missing. I wonder why I think 'sun' it's black all over. I wonder what Sinar saw in it and why he should think I'd need it more than him. But then, so much about him is a riddle. Almost everything but one:

There is no hope for Sinar - this I know.

Great update!

 

Thank you Tatooine_Ghost.

Now you'll find out why, Alexis. I don't know if it gets any less scary, though.

Thanks, Vadey.
I just had to wrap up the Sinar situation somehow. Poor Sinar, he's really crazy.

---

[u]Entry 41[/u]

I am a fool. A fool of fools, king of fools, if there is such a thing.
That's what you get for thinking yourself normal, and dismissing craziness as nonsense. Should have known better. I knew better, but I forgot. [i]They said I'd forget if I remembered.[/i] But I didn't think it would happen so slowly, imperceptibly. I thought it would happen in one big bang, and all memory of Lancer to be lost.

[i]I am still here.[/i]
I forgot still. Forgot how is was, living inside the mad house, how sane everything in there was in its own weird way. How being there did not mean you were a complete idiot. [i]Getting out turns you into one soon enough.[/i]
It does.

For days the thing Sinar gave me just laid there. I wondered a little why he had given it to me. I should have asked him what he thought it could do. But I didn't. He's mad, how serious can you take him? What can he possibly tell you, and why should I enter into his nightmare again? I had no reasons. I have not time for games.

I have no time for anything but the hunt. I am myself again. I am Boba Fett.
[i]And a fool.[/i]

When I finally decided to put object away, I found the other thing Sinar gave me when I left. The material was similar and when I tried to fit it into the missing slot, it did. Not only that. the moment the sun was complete, a signal flickered over the dark surface of the round centrepiece. It was not just a reflection moving over the smooth surface as I turned it, it had been inside the object. When I touched the surface, a signal jumped up and then it went black again.

Carefully, I removed the ray again, and when I inserted it, I watched the object intently. It was the same, first a flicker, and a signal flashing out when I touched the middle piece. It was gone to fast for me to make anything of it. But I had become curious. I got my helmet and recorded the signal, watching it as a freeze image. It was nothing I recognised, though. I fed the image into my ship's comp and searched the holonet for information. And since I was at it already, I did the same with the object itself.

After a little research, it turned out to be an artefact, old technology used hundreds of years ago, preferredly by - the Sith. A Sith artefact. I wonder how Sinar came to have it. Did it just turn up in a pile of junk one day, or did he have it before he was committed to the asylum? Was it the reason he feared Palpatine so much? The Emperor would surely have liked to get his hands on it.

The rays turned out to be removable data storage, and it was likely that other hardware could be attached to the main piece, too. The sign that flashed up when I attached the last ray was just telling me that all ports were full and the object ready. I wondered who would be able to see the sign well enough in such a short time to realize that. Maybe a Sith.

The workings were pretty intuitive. Some places were sensitive to pressure, light or sound. It took only a few hours to get a rudimentary access to the data stored in the rays. I know why Sinar gave me one of them: it was full with everything about the Clone Wars. The real version, not history. I was enraged to learn that my father obviously got caught in a conflict that had not been real, but a play staged to put Palpatine into power. Had he not been dead yet, I would have gotten him within the next hours. It was almost unbelievable that he should have staged a whole galaxy-spanning war just to become emperor. Or was it?

What was I willing to do to reach my goal? What was I willing to sacrifice, to invest, to see through? Just because my goal did not need a galaxy spanning war to work, did that mean I would not stage one if I had to?
Would I?

The other compartments were stuffed with political information ab

 

Hmm... so the object was kind of like a holocron... only not.

Good introspective about Boba wondering if he would do the same as Palpatine had if he had to to reach his goals.

 

After browsing for a while, it became more and more clear that this was a part of Palpatines extensive spy network. The folders were for individual sources, the colours showing the time that had passed since they last reported in. The icons meant that they had been found out, killed, or worse. And some folders were still active. Most prominent was somebody called Delta Source. He reported regularly, and mostly on the going-ons of the senate. Amazing that nobody noticed, and the spy hadn't stopped with Palpatine dead and the Empire gone. Or he was now reporting to somebody else, an Imperial who had decided to gather up what Palpatine left. That would be something to keep in mind.

I did not know if any of the other information would be of use to me, but I would find out.

Very interesting! But you're right, still worrisome!

 

About right, Alexis. I don't have a word for it either. There's not much left to think about now.

No worries, Vadey, he will get out alive.
Though not unchanged.

Thank you for your patience. By now I should be able to space out the last updates in a way that will not frop me from the challenge.

---

[b][u]Entry 42[/u][/b]

Time went by without me realizing. The artefact was very useful indeed. I was able to attain a few bounty heads before their names were actually out in the ether. It makes them much easier to collect if they don't feel hunted. It was no challenge, and I soon gave up on it. Only if the bounty promised to be very high, I resorted to this method.

[i]I still prefer to hunt.[/i]

It seems to be something ingrained in each bounty hunter. Even Dengar, who married and allegedly retired is still taking on bounties from time to time. Not that he is any competition, he has never been. Back, when I split up the Bounty Hunter's Guild, I used him a few times. I know his weaknesses well.

I think Kees hooked up with him after the incident with the sarlacc. After all, Dengar found her and brought her back to life; she would feel she owed him. Additionally, she cannot stand being completely on her own. The opportunity to get involved with Dengar might not have been planned, but she certainly appreciates having friends again.

[i]Stupid.[/i]

Because this is how I will get her, through her friends. The easiest way to get an elusive prey into a trap is baiting them with their friends. Better still, baiting them, without their knowledge. I have already created another identity, one that will set up a bounty Dengar cannot resist. Only a few details have to be observed before I can set my plan into motion. It will feel good to be myself again.


Then, a few days ago, the information of the artefact ran dry. Not a single source, but all of them From one day to the next, non reported anything new. It was especially obvious with Delta Source which used to be punctual like clockwork. For a week I monitored the folders, but nothing happened. Whoever had been directing the information to it still, had stopped.

I guess that there is indeed a new commander of the Imperials, one who's pretty crafty and thorough. He realized that information leaked out, even if nobody knew where to. He's a careful one, disconnecting the whole unit from the system. He's most likely trying to track the item, too. Since I don't know how and if it works in detail and if there is a transmitter in it, I decided to get rid of it. Returning it to Sinar was not an option. I did not want to be responsible for Sinar's fate in the case that it was indeed found.

I copied the important data from the artefact to the ship's comp. Then I jettisoned it in hyperspace. [i]Try to find me now.[/i]

 

The hunter makes sure he isn't the one being hunted. Very wise. Great update.

I can't wait 'til December!

 

Excellent! I can't wait to see what happens next!

 

Well, so far, Alexis. His plans for drawing her out look a little different.
Yay for December!

Not much Vadey, I'm afraid. Buuut come next update, come action. Promise.


And now, to the antepenultimate update of this diary.

---

[u]Entry 43[/u]


The set up was perfect, and Dengar fell for it immediately. Putting up a bunch of pirates that attacked New Republic ships had been easy, as had everything else. The most difficult part had been appearing sloppy. I hate making mistakes, but this time I had no choice. So I made sure to almost drop into the spiked pit when it opened and dangle for a while and wait foor Dengar to save my hide. The show had to be perfect, after all.

And it was. Dengar did not realize what happened until I held my blaster to his temple and demanded the last bounty head. What was strange, though was that he seemed to take me for Kees at first. Was her act that good? I could not believe it. The fact that I did not act as if I knew him finally threw him onto the right track though. It would be better for him to retire if he has become slow like that.

"You're that Kast guy. Jodo Kast," he accused me. It was almost comical. He assured me he wouldn't kill me since it was not his style. Of course, I knew that already.

"I don't trust anybody. Keeps me alive," I replied, making sure the fake pirate would not wake up to tell his tale.

"Being smart keeps you alive," Dengar countered. "And masquerading as Boba Fett is not smart."

I had him now. No matter what, he would contact Kees and insist that she finally do something. Since Jabba's demise she had kept an extremely low profile. Fett could still be hired, but only if you had enough money and kept things quiet. A clever move if she wanted more time to spend as herself, but it meant that she could not risk an impostor running around ruining that.

So she will come out now. And then, I have her.

Choiceless.
Chanceless.
Mine.

I must admit that she has kept my reputation well. She has been is good at being me and it is probably better this way, than if I had been lost for a the time. I might thank her, though she might not be alive to hear it.

The time to write is over.
Now, it is time to hunt.

 

I'm always SO excited to see this one updated!

So she will come out now. And then, I have her.

Choiceless.
Chanceless.
Mine.

I must admit that she has kept my reputation well. She has been is good at being me and it is probably better this way, than if I had been lost for a the time. I might thank her, though she might not be alive to hear it.

The time to write is over.
Now, it is time to hunt.

 

Oh, I can't wait for the next update! I'm on the edge of my seat!

 

So here's a big bunch of excitement for you, Vadey. Extra long update, hope you like it.

*puts a cushion on the floor in front of Alexis seat*
I hope it lives up to the expectations.

Aaand, if Kees is not making much sense to you, try 'I, Boba' it might make sense then. Of course, you'll already know the end of that if you read this. Oh.

SPOILERWARNING!
The following gives away the end of 'I, Boba'. If you don't want to know, don't read.

---

[u]Entry 44[/u]

All too easy.
She did what I would have done, what I have done, she placed a bounty. And she asked for Jodo Kast specifically, on the grounds the Fett was not available. [i]Well informed.[/i] Badly misinformed. The whole mission reeked of set up, I had a destination where to find the alleged Satnik Hiicrop, the bounty was extremely high, and even higher for alive.

I did not expect to find anybody but Kees.
And I was right.
[i]And all wrong.[/i]

She went about the set up careful, choosing a place she knew well and where nobody would care about yet another shoot out. I set the [i]Foxcatch [/i] down on Nal Hutta six days after the incident with Dengar. He must have been very annoyed indeed. Still I was sure her traps were lethal, I would not play the klutz this time.

The victim was supposedly hiding in a bunker-like building in the middle of nowhere. I entered cautiously, triggering the photo sensor only after realising what it would do. So when the floor under me suddenly sloped down, I simply rode it on my heels, keeping my blaster ready. But nothing attacked yet. Another blast door came up. It was gimmicked perfectly, short circuiting would have taken hours. Blasting a hole into it carefully took only minutes. I made sure nothing dropped to the floor on the other side, and when I could finally scan it, my guess proved to be right. The ground just behind it was rigged with pressure sensors. I was not keen on finding out what they launched. But then, I didn't have to. A quick climb and short rocket pack enhanced jump later, I stood in the middle of a small rectangular room with no other exit.

A scan showed that there was no way to get through the walls, so I aimed at the ceiling instead. This was annoyingly accurately laid out. I shot a magnetic grappler at it, climbed through the hole and threw a piece of rubble at the pressure sensor. Immediately, a laser web sprang into life, turning the chamber into a death trap. This was highly professional. The Kast I had shown Dengar would have been fried by now.

The upper level was dark and derelict, a small access panel was beckoning me, as if I could shut down the remaining defences from there. [i]How stupid could a bounty hunter be? [/i] I wondered. Such obvious traps. Finally, I got to the lightened part of the building. I short circuited another door and found myself in a huge room. It was two storeys tall, a stair leading from the door right down to a holograph of a human lying on the floor. I shook my head.

Underestimation, the first step towards death. How could anybody wearing a helmet equipped like a Mandalorian fall for such a crude trick?

As it turned out, Kees didn't even expect me to.

"You're dead." Her blaster connected with the back of my helmet.

As if. But her approach was commendable. It would have worked on anybody. Anybody, but me. I ignited the rocket pack, jerking my head to the left at the same moment. This forced her to step back, and gave me the time to come around, all systems ready, and blaster pointing at the weakest point of the armour. She didn't stumble, she didn't even retreat further than a single step. She kept her ground like Boba Fett. Then she raised her flamethrower, forcing me to sidestep to the right. I prepared for the next assault, getting the fibre cord ready, but instead of attacking, she used her jet pack like a sledge and knocked my feet out under me. A clever move, rather creative and effective. I blocked the coming blow with my right gauntlet, trying to ge

 

Wow! What an incredible post!

I still don't understand it.
Of course, I do.
Well, why she did it, that I understand.
But why did I?
It is not like me at all.
For Sinar.
As if somebody else took over and acted instead.
For Lancer.
Still - I let her go.
For me.

 

wow

 

Stang but that was great!

Kees set all that up just to give in peacefully. I can see why Boba would be rather taken off guard.

Is there more?

 

Last update. I'm gonna miss this.

Thank you Vadey. It took some me quite some time to get it right, parts of it are almost a year old...

Speechless, Tatooine_Ghost? Makes me speechless in return.

Erm, probably not a set up on her part, Alexis, but at that point in her life there are little things she wants less than being Fett...
And Boba - he's got no people skills...

So, last update.

---

Entry 45

I don't know why, but every now and then I get the urge, the need, to write things down. To make sure it is not forgotten. I think it is Lancer. He is still there, but I am, what life has made me, what I chose to be and become. There is little place for Lancer.

The galaxy has not become a better place while I was gone. In fact, the galaxy doesn't even know I have missed. For an untrained layman, Kees has done a good job at keeping my business. Lancer would like to know how that sudden shift in morals has affected her. I don't care. I don't care who she is, and how she managed, I don't want to know what she thinks about being me. I don't care what she's doing now. I am who I am. That is enough.

I don't know if I have become a better person while I was gone, but with Lancer nagging at the back of my mind, so I think it's possible. The two of us don't match well: he wants to help Sinar, and I suggest putting him out of his misery quick and clean. Of course, Lancer is shocked. He believes in the good in Sinar, the part of him that could be saved.

It is not my job to save. It is not my job to save anybody but myself. I bring back bounties. I hunt. I am.

[i]Memories.[/i]
I know how important they can be now. There are things you have to remember, just to be yourself. So I write. I don't. I know.

There are scratches on my bulkhead. Thousands of them, stringed up neatly, always five in a group. My bunk looks like a prison cell, the scratches are everywhere. And I know, was I to count them, I would know how many days I have not been Boba Fett. I stroked the surface and remembered her downcast eyes.

Lorna Kees is really dead this time, I have seen to that. And she put up no resistance. That haunted look in her eyes disappeared the moment she realized what I was about to do. Sometimes it haunts my sleep.

When I remember the woman that left the [i]SlaveI[/i], I see Jerida Anasst. The short dark hair hidden under a colourful kerchief, and she smiled at me, as if it was just a casual parting, and nothing that meant forever. [i]I have never seen anybody so happy before.[/i] It doesn't matter. [i]It could.[/i] I don't care. I won't see her again.

I could. I know that she -, well, she's there - unconditional and nevertheless. And, for reasons I don't care to explore, it feels good to know that somewhere out there, she is, always will be. She doesn't even care, what I think about it. I have no say in this. I do not care.

"Should you ever be lonely?"

Those words haunt me sometimes. She should not have said it, it was not necessary. I am the wolf unto man. I have not time for loneliness.

 

Wow, very nice wrap-up to a great story.

 

Excellent finale! Yes, PLEASE PM me when you start posting the sequel!

There are scratches on my bulkhead. Thousands of them, stringed up neatly, always five in a group. My bunk looks like a prison cell, the scratches are everywhere. And I know, was I to count them, I would know how many days I have not been Boba Fett. I stroked the surface and remembered her downcast eyes.

Lorna Kees is really dead this time, I have seen to that. And she put up no resistance. That haunted look in her eyes disappeared the moment she realized what I was about to do. Sometimes it haunts my sleep.

 

Great story.

 

Alexis.
It hurt to end it, but I had to.
On to the sequel...

Vadey.
I will pm you anyway.
They both loste some time of their lives. But who will make up for that better?

earlybird-obi-wan.
Thanks a lot for reading.

Readers.


Lurkers.

 

Wow, okay, I totally couldn't figure this out till you wrote it all.

I love it. It has exactly the "narrow-minded" feel to it that you'd expect from reading someone's personal diary without knowing what else is actually happening to make them write what they do. I don't know if that makes sense. But I really enjoyed this story!