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Saga - PT Why Couldn't I Save Him? (Anakin and Obi-Wan vignette; AU) posted 9/23

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by JediMaster_Jen, Sep 23, 2004.

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  1. JediMaster_Jen

    JediMaster_Jen Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 3, 2002
    Title: Why Couldn’t I save Him?

    Summary: A Jedi Master suffers the loss of his first apprentice.

    Disclaimer: Star Wars belong to the Disney Co. I am not making any money on the endeavor.

    Read the companion piece to this story. [link=http://boards.theforce.net/threads/...kywalker-vignette-posted-9-25.17039946/]Scars on the Heart[/link]

    *******************************************************************

    ”You shouldn’t be here, Master. You’re not welcome,” the tall, blonde-haired Padawan Learner stated calmly.

    “We have things to discuss, young one,” came the Master’s harsh reply to his student.

    “I don’t want to hear anything you have to say! You mean nothing to me,
    Master,” he spewed hatefully at the older man, turning his back on him.

    The sound of a lightsaber igniting and the accompanying blue glow glinting off the cave wall grabbed the Padawan’s attention. He pivoted sharply, his booted feet scraping the rough ground beneath. He quickly locked his blue eyes onto those of his former mentor. His gaze never once wavering, the Padawan thumbed on his own weapon, the blue glow now tinged in red. Slowly, he twirled the saber and smiled, a smile that used to convey warmth and genuine caring but now only reflected the rage and torment the young man felt.

    “You don’t want this fight. You don’t want to fight me, Master,” the Padawan said, too calmly for his Master’s liking. “Or maybe you do. Maybe you want to see your training in action,” he taunted, his eyes lit with hatred for the man standing in front of him. “Perhaps you’d like a demonstration of my true power,” he said as the two men had begun to slowly circle one another.

    “You don’t have to do this, Padawan. There is another way, I can…,” he stopped abruptly, suddenly sensing danger through the Force only seconds before his former student launched his attack. It was the last mistake the student ever made.


    ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    “Certain you are, that gone he is?” Yoda asked his fellow Jedi Master.

    “Yes Master, I am certain that my former Padawan Learner is dead. I watched his…,” he paused to clear his throat, then continued moments later,”…I watched his body fall into the crevasse in the cave myself. He is gone, I assure you of that,” he finished, his voice steady and even.

    “Very well, dismissed you are,” Yoda told him.

    The Master wasted no time in striding from the room and heading towards his quarters, the quarters he’d shared with his Padawan just weeks before. Now he had the task of removing the young man’s belongings. A solemn task to be sure and one he certainly wasn’t looking forward to.

    He stepped up in front of the door expecting to see the familiar placard with their names emblazoned for all to see, but found it gone. Frowning slightly as he sensed a presence inside, he punched a button on the control panel next to the door and watched as it slid open. Seeing the figure seated on his couch, the Master sighed deeply.

    “What are you doing here?” the Master asked quietly, his energy gone. He practically fell into the hover chair that was placed across the room from the couch.

    The older man raised an eyebrow. “I should think that was obvious,” he replied somewhat teasingly.

    The Master wasn’t amused. He was tired, irritable and all he really wanted was to take a nice hot shower, eat a warm dinner and sleep for the rest of his life. Now that wouldn’t be possible, supposing it ever was in the first place.

    “Tell me what happened,” the older man commanded in a soft voice, his concern for the Master coming through in his tone.

    “What’s to tell?” the Master asked conversationally.

    “My Padawan, a boy I first met when he was merely a child, decided that my teachings and my guidance weren’t enough for him. He decided that his new Master, a Sith no less, was more qualified to be his teacher, his mentor,” he said as if he were giving a simple mission report.

    “Several hours ago, I confronted my former Padawan Learner and we fought. Now he’s dead, and I’m alive and I can’t change that and neither can you, or Yoda, or anyone else!” he yelled, his emotions finally boiling over.

    Tears were raining down his tanned cheeks as he dropped his head into his hands and sobbed for his lost student, a boy he’d raised and loved as his own son.

    The older man stood and went quickly to the younger man’s side. He pulled him into his arms and held him as he cried, just as he had done when this strong man had been a child. He rubbed slow circles over his broad shoulder and back, slowly easing away the tension of the last few weeks.

    “I c-couldn’t save h-him. W-why c-cou-couldn’t I s-save him, Master?” he sobbed, begging the older man for an explanation. “Y-you saved m-me, why c-couldn’t I do it f-for him?,” he continued to cry.

    “You did save him, Padawan. You did save him,” the older man said with conviction. “Losing one’s self to the Dark Side is a fate worse than death. You spared him that agony, Padawan. Always remember that. Always remember that you did save him,” he finished quietly, still holding tightly to his crying former apprentice.

    “It h-hurts, Master. I m-miss him so m-much,” he sobbed. His tears hadn’t abated, and the older man knew that they wouldn’t for a long time to come. Even when the physical evidence of them was gone and his eyes were dry, his soul would cry still and his heart would bleed.

    The older man clutched the sobbing Jedi closer, his own eyes starting to water at the raw emotion he felt coming from his former student. “The pain will lessen in time; I promise you that, my Padawan. Losing someone you love leaves a scar on the heart that never quite heals, but it does become easier to live with,” he told him, hoping that his words of wisdom would serve his former student well once more. Then, placing a fatherly kiss atop his matted hair, Obi-Wan Kenobi left Anakin Skywalker alone to come to terms with the loss of his first apprentice.
     
  2. obi_ew

    obi_ew Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Apr 14, 2002
    :eek: Clever twist there! I thought it was the obvious until you brought the elder master in. Never guessed this one! :D Great job!
     
  3. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2004
    Oh, I LOVED this! A nice twist at the end to keep me guessing! Feel free to write more of these, lots more!
     
  4. SenatorHermione

    SenatorHermione Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    May 21, 2004
    Poor Padme! To have such a hunk for a husband and then a dream like that! Great viggie!
     
  5. Jedikma

    Jedikma Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2004
    A twist I definately didn't see coming. Nicely done!
     
  6. JediMaster_Jen

    JediMaster_Jen Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 3, 2002
    obi-ew~Thank you. I was hoping to keep people guessing.

    VaderLVR64~I'm glad you enjoyed the viggie. Just because you asked, maybe I'll write more. [face_laugh]

    SenatorHermione~Glad you enjoyed the story, but...it isn't Padme dreaming, it's Anakin telling the Council of how he lost his apprentice, then being comforted by Obi-Wan.

    Jedikma~Thanks so much. Ya like that blindside, huh? [face_laugh]
     
  7. Kynstar

    Kynstar Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Mar 2, 2004
    Excellent job!!! Totally took me by surprise ;) Well done!! Loved how you detailed Anakin's anguish. I bet he had a sense of deja vu sorta as with his mum not being able to save her either.
     
  8. red rose knight

    red rose knight Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 3, 2001
    Now that was a most excellent twist :) Good job!
     
  9. kristeh

    kristeh Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    May 24, 2003
    What a surprising twist at the end! :D I loved it! Anakin's sorrow and guilt were so touching. I'm glad Obi-Wan (I assume it was Obi-Wan) was there to comfort him.

    Kristeh
     
  10. JediMaster_Jen

    JediMaster_Jen Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 3, 2002
    Kynstar~Thank you. Yes, I'm sure Anakin did have flashbacks to his mother's death and his inability to save her.

    red_rose_knight~Thank you so much.

    kristeh~It was Obi-Wan. Thanks for reading.
     
  11. Shaindl

    Shaindl Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 18, 2002
    Great twist at the end! And some lovely mush/angst to boot. :D Looking forward to reading more of your work soon!

    Shaindl

    PS: You might want to edit your post to shorten the section dividers you put in. Because they're overlong, they forced me (and I'm sure others) to scroll from side to side, which in a short piece like yours isn't bad, but in a longer piece can get irritating. Thought you'd like to know. :)
     
  12. JediMaster_Jen

    JediMaster_Jen Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 3, 2002
    Shaindl~Thanks for the tip. It's taken care of. Glad you enjoyed the story, and the ending twist.
     
  13. Mike-Sunrider

    Mike-Sunrider Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Oct 4, 2003
    LOL! I thought it was about the Duel. Well I was totally wrong XD

    Nice work. I love it.

    Great twist too btw ;)
     
  14. JediMaster_Jen

    JediMaster_Jen Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 3, 2002
    Mike_Sunrider~That's what I wanted people to think. [face_laugh] Thanks for reading. I'm glad you liked it.
     
  15. Arwyn_Whitesun

    Arwyn_Whitesun Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 13, 2002
    That was a very nice twist. That's one of the things I missed about SW fan fiction. All the wonderful permuations you can create with the characters. Nicely done!
     
  16. JediMaster_Jen

    JediMaster_Jen Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 3, 2002
    Arwyn_Whitesun~Thanks you. I'm glad that you enjoyed the vig. I love taking George's characters and playing with them. It's fun. [face_laugh]
     
  17. VampericWound

    VampericWound Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Sep 13, 2004
    OMG! Very good twist. Very good story. GoodJob Jen.
     
  18. JediMaster_Jen

    JediMaster_Jen Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 3, 2002
    VampericWound~Thanks a bunch. I don't think I've ever had an OMG! reaction to a fic before. Glad you liked the twist.
     
  19. Gina

    Gina Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 3, 2003
    :eek: Whoa! Brilliant twist and an excellent viggie.

    ?You did save him, Padawan. You did save him,? the older man said with conviction. ?Losing ones self to the Dark Side is a fate worse than death. You spared him that agony, Padawan. Always remember that. Always remember that you did save him,? he finished quietly, still holding tightly to his crying former apprentice.

    So powerful!

     
  20. JediMaster_Jen

    JediMaster_Jen Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 3, 2002
    Gina~Thanks so much.
     
  21. LaYa_

    LaYa_ Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Jul 21, 2003
    Very good twist... I was really thinking it was a vignette after the duel.. but it wasn't!!!

    Great job! :)
     
  22. JediMaster_Jen

    JediMaster_Jen Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 3, 2002
    LaYa~ Thanks for reading. Glad you liked the twist. I was hoping people would be surprised. :)
     
  23. obi-wan_index

    obi-wan_index Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Sep 25, 2004
    Ooooooooh.... very good. VERY good. :) I do love a surprise ending. ;) And the way the emotions of the characters were handled throughout were very believable and well written. Great piece! :)

    sg

    edit: baaahh! Got so into the story I forgot to log out of the index sock. Oh well, you know it's me, spiritgurl. ;)
     
  24. JediMaster_Jen

    JediMaster_Jen Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 3, 2002
    spiritgurl~Thanks so much.

    I love a surprise ending too.
     
  25. SarkaVrae

    SarkaVrae Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Jun 3, 2004
    Very good! I've been purusing through the older fics--and running into this one was really awesome! I loved the twist!
     
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