Before - Legends Worth Saving / Unexpected Treasures - Qui-Gon vignette - Now OC centered! Sort of updated

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by VaderLVR64, Nov 28, 2005.

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  1. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Feb 5, 2004
    Title: Unexpected Treasures
    Author: VaderLVR64
    Characters: Qui-Gon Jinn, OCs
    Summary: The Force leads a young Jedi to a place he did not expect.
    Notes: Written for the [link=]Qui-Gon Jinn Challenge Thread[/link]. I fell in love with the OC in this, and there will be at least one more viggie featuring her. Those darned OCs, I always end up getting involved with them!

    Unexpected Treasures

    Qui-Gon Jinn, newly knighted Jedi, muttered as he walked along the cold streets. The wind howled, whipping his cloak about him. He was tired, and hungry, and he had just been about to turn around and go back to his warm room when the Force had prompted him to walk down a particularly dirty, smelly alley that seemed to stretch on forever. There were times he wished he could have ignored the whisperings of the Force, and this was one of them.

    ?Couldn?t have done this after my dinner, I suppose,? the big man grumbled, drawing his cloak more tightly about him. The wind merely seemed to pick up a bit more in response to his complaints. He wondered if the Force was chastising him for his lack of enthusiasm. He continued to trudge along, less than happy about it, but following where his heart led him nonetheless.

    Soon he found his eyes straying toward a dimly lit cantina. ?At least I can get a drink here,? he murmured to himself as he entered. The situation had begun to look a bit less grim.

    The cantina was slightly warmer than the stinking alley, but smelled about the same. The bartender was a human male with a sour expression and grimy hands. ?What can I get you?? he asked sullenly.

    So much for customer service, Qui-Gon mused. ?Ale- the darkest you have,? the Jedi answered, taking in every detail of the tiny establishment. He was the only customer, which was not a good sign. He sighed to himself. He had been lead here for a reason, now he just had to wait patiently and let it be revealed to him.

    The bartender slammed down a semi-clean glass in front of him. With a cautious sniff, Qui-Gon took a sip - acceptable, not good, but better than might be expected. As he lifted his drink, his cloak fell open to reveal the lightsaber hanging on his belt.

    Eyeing it curiously, the bartender grunted. ?Don?t get many of your kind in here,? he noted. ?Fact, you?re the first one that?s ever been here.?

    ?I?m on my way back to Coruscant tomorrow,? Qui-Gon said. Thank the Force.

    ?Were you here for that treaty thing?? the man asked as he wiped off the bar.

    ?Yes,? Qui-Gon answered, distracted. The Force was becoming an ever more urgent whisper in his mind.

    A muffled sound from the room behind the bar caused the man to throw down the rag in irritation and curse loudly. He disappeared into the room and then came back to the bar holding a bundle. ?This stupid brat?s hungry again,? he grumbled.

    Qui-Gon?s eyes widened when he recognized that the bundle was a baby. It appeared to be human and about six months old, if his crèche experience was any guide. He watched in growing disgust as the bartender mashed up some half-rotten grala fruit and stuck it in the baby?s mouth with one dirty finger.

    ?Is that your baby?? he asked casually, in spite of the fact that his hand itched to give the man a good punch.

    A look of disdain crossed the bartender?s face. ?This thing?? he asked. Qui-Gon felt his anger go up a notch. ?Nope, this rotten little whelp belonged to a pleasure worker who rented the room upstairs.? His face grew hard when the baby whimpered softly. ?She up and died on me three days ago, leaving the brat behind.? He roughly shifted the baby in his arms, eliciting a very soft, tentative cry.

    ?What are you going to do with the baby?? Qui-Gon asked quietly, in a voice that those who knew him would have recognized as dangerous.

    The man sighed in exasperation. ?I don?t know,? he muttered. ?No one wants her and I?m tired of feeding her. Guess I?m stuck with her until I can find someone that?ll take her.?

    ?May I ho
  2. Kynstar

    Kynstar Jedi Knight star 5

    Mar 2, 2004
    Awwww lil baby! [face_love] That's so cute! LOL about having to explain to Master Yoda about the 'package' [face_laugh] Another pathetic life form... ;) but not so pathetic, we all know Yoda has a soft spot for the lil'uns!

    Great job!
  3. DarkMan77

    DarkMan77 Jedi Youngling star 2

    Mar 23, 2005
    Qui-Gon's such a mushy feller isn't he.
    I love a good baby tale!
  4. Healer_Leona

    Healer_Leona Squirrel Wrangler of Fun & Games star 9 Staff Member Manager

    Jul 7, 2000
    Awww, coan't help but feel as content as little Nyyla. [face_love] [face_love]
  5. Kestrel_Kenobi

    Kestrel_Kenobi Jedi Master star 4

    Sep 26, 2005
    I Look forward to more!
    Lovely =D=
  6. Star_Drifter

    Star_Drifter Jedi Youngling star 3

    Jul 18, 2005
    I managed to hurt my shoulder, and I cannot do my usual reviews for a while. I don?t want to stop reading, but I can only type with one very tired hand. [face_frustrated]

    When you don?t see this, you?ll know I am better.

    I think that OCs are fun! We couldn't have more stories without them, could we? ;)

    What a cute little baby! [:D] Nyyla, "precious one".

    She certainly lives up to her name! :)

    Great little viggie! =D=
  7. KELIA

    KELIA Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Jul 26, 2005
    Awwww...that just melted my heart.

    Smart Qui-Gon for listening to the force and finding Nyyla.

    Great job!!

    =D= =D= =D= =D=
  8. LilyHobbitJedi

    LilyHobbitJedi Jedi Knight star 5

    Aug 29, 2005
    That was so cute. Just like Qui-Gon to rescue infants, wonderful little fic. =D= =D= =D=
  9. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Feb 5, 2004
    Kynstar Yoda's pretty darn little himself! ;)

    DarkMan77 I love babies, too! [face_love]

    Healer_Leona Yeah, I know you were just wishing you were wrapped up in that cloak with him! o_O

    Kestrel_Kenobi Well, Nyyla had some more to say. :D

    Star_Drifter [:D] I hope your shoulder is feeling better!

    KELIA You know Jinn and those "pathetic life forms!"

    LilyHobbitJedi Thank you! :)

    Title: Worth Saving
    Author: VaderLVR64
    Characters: OC (Nyyla)
    Summary: A Jedi serves in many ways.
    Notes: The ?Mush? challenge in the Qui-Gon Challenge thread prompted me to write a vignette featuring a baby girl. This baby girl has found a niche in my heart and I decided that there was more of her story left to tell.

    [b]Worth Saving [/b]

    I am Nyyla and this is my journey.

    There is no reason to know my name; I am not a particularly talented Padawan. I am fourteen years old and was chosen just last year by my Master. My gifts are humble and practical, but my joy in them is great ? far beyond the confines of the crèche in which I happily labor. My joy is not tempered by discontent or envy; it is merely sweetened by the knowledge that my life almost took a very different path.

    My arrival here in the Temple was unexpected. I was brought here, wrapped in the cloak of the Knight who rescued me. I have heard this much by listening quietly to the whispers of the crèche masters. My first sensory memory is of a deep, soothing voice murmuring in my ears as I am carried along cold, windy streets.

    Sometimes, I still hear that howling wind, buried deep inside a dream that I can never quite recall when I awake. I am soothed by the comforting voice of my rescuer, the one who plucked me from the darkness and carried me so tenderly into the light. I do not know his name, but to me, he will always be my savior.

    When I roam the corridors of the Temple, I think I sometimes catch the murmur of that familiar voice, but I have never been able to put a face to the sound. It does not matter.

    Although I arrived newly named and freshly orphaned, I know more of my past than most of the Padawans. I have absorbed snatches of conversation, bits of information, whispers I am not meant to hear. Putting them together has been both painful and freeing. The portrait they have formed is sure to be inaccurate in some places, correct in others.

    All of those pieces, however, are part of my past and it is to my future that I look ? a future I have only because some nameless Jedi something in me worth saving, some glimmer that might be salvaged. He took a chance by bringing me to the Order, and with each task my hands perform, I give my thanks.

    I am Nyyla, daughter of a dead pleasure worker. But that is not [i]who[/i] I am. I am Nyyla, Jedi Padawan.

    It seems right that my first memory of being in the Temple should be of a kindly face beaming down at me, the soft touch of a warm hand against my cheek. In that memory, I see her lips move, but the words she said to me have been lost to the years. Even now, though, I can recognize the generous heart behind her smile. That lovely face belongs to Juwalee ? my Master.

    It was Master Juwalee who tended my small hurts and comforted me when I would wake up ? still in the grip of a nightmare. Some might say she was a mother to me, but I am content and proud to call her Master.

    Now when I look in the mirror, I still see Nyyla. My eyes are still as dark, my hair remains a cap of tight, dark curls, and my skin is still the color of caf sweetened with nerf milk. In that mirror, I also see a future Jedi Knight, a woman who will serve the Order by nurturing the younglings in our care. It is a noble calling and I am honored to answer it.

    This morning is like all the others, nothing special happens. I waken our charges, getting sleepy younglings in motion, setting the crèche to rights for the day ahead. Yet, I am struck by the notion that the strands of Fate have intertwi>
  10. DarkMan77

    DarkMan77 Jedi Youngling star 2

    Mar 23, 2005
    That was awesome Vader =D= It got me all warm inside [face_blush]
    I like Nyyla and the fact she watches ove young Obi!
  11. Layren

    Layren Jedi Master star 5

    Oct 28, 2003
    Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww that's so wonderful mush, Kim! I'm so glad you've done more with this character and shared her with us :D I do hope she gets to meet her savior someday in the future ;)
  12. dianethx

    dianethx Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Mar 1, 2002
    That was lovely. Loved that the OC gave Obi-Wan a lesson in dreams. She's really sweet with the kids and will be a wonderful Padawan in the creche.
  13. BrightFeather

    BrightFeather Jedi Youngling star 3

    Nov 13, 2005
    Awwwww. Nice. :)
  14. KELIA

    KELIA Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Jul 26, 2005
    Awww...that was even sweeter than the first post.

    I love how Nyyla "took" to Obi-Wan right away and was able to comfort him after his bad dream.

    But what of her feelings of foreboding? [face_thinking] [face_thinking]

    I have a bad feeling about this...

    Great update!!

    =D= =D= =D= =D=
  15. Star_Drifter

    Star_Drifter Jedi Youngling star 3

    Jul 18, 2005
    ?Nyyla,? the little boy says. ?I had a bad dream last night.?

    Kneeling down in front of him, I brush back the reddish strands of hair that fall across his forehead. ?What was it?? I ask softly. I know I am not supposed to have favorites, but I must admit that little Obi-Wan stole my heart the moment they brought him into the crèche.

    He shrugs, unable to express what he feels. He is wise beyond his years, with a connection to the Force that most knights would envy. My own connection to the Force is uncertain, flickering like a candle in a drafty room. When I am with someone like this child, however, it strengthens, blazes briefly and I am warmed by his presence. He is still a child, though, just a little boy with the typical vocabulary of a seven-year-old human. I must help him express what troubles him.

    How wonderful that Nyyla is going to serve the Temple by working in the crèche, and that she knows Obi-Wan! Now she is sure to find Qui-Gon! :)

    Yet, I am struck by the notion that the strands of Fate have intertwined in a new way and the winds have shifted ? somehow. Events are being put into motion that will not be recognized for years and I am suddenly fearful. It is not often that I am gifted with such premonitions.

    [face_thinking] She had a premonition, and Obi-Wan had a dream. I sense that the two are connected, and that you will soon be telling us more, please! ;)

    Thank you very much for your kind concern! [:D] It is feeling better now!

  16. LilyHobbitJedi

    LilyHobbitJedi Jedi Knight star 5

    Aug 29, 2005
    That was so absolutely adorable. Nyyla helping little Obi-Wan, I just love anything with him as a kid. Great story!! =D= =D=
  17. -Darksaber-

    -Darksaber- Jedi Youngling star 3

    Mar 22, 2005
    Yay! Obi-Wan! This is very sweet.
  18. Lovely-in-Orange

    Lovely-in-Orange Jedi Youngling star 3

    Apr 21, 2005
    Aww, both chapters/viggies were wonderfully sweet. I always thought that dreams pass in time came out of Obi-Wan trying to be kind and comforting. Nice to see it's origin. :) I also like how Qui-Gon is willing to honestly pay without mind-tricking, but only to a point.
  19. Jedi_Tigris

    Jedi_Tigris Jedi Knight star 4

    Mar 7, 2005
    Awww, that's so sweet! I love Nyyla already. :D Qui and his "pathetic life forms" :p Glad she's still in the temple though, and working in the creche. Fits well. :) Love how she handled Obi's concerns about his dream. Wonder if his dream and her feeling of premonition are linked? [face_thinking]
  20. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Feb 5, 2004
    DarkMan77 I liked her too! :D

    Layren I cannot say, my muse will hurt me! :p

    dianethx She has a real empathy for the younglings. [face_love]

    BrightFeather Thank you! :D

    KELIA Actually, those are tied to a plot bunny I had for much later in her life. [face_whistling]

    Star_Drifter Or maybe he'll find HER! :p

    LilyHobbitJedi I love little Obi, too!

    -Darksaber- Thanks! [face_batting]

    Lovely-in-OrangeQui-Gon is both street smart and noble. :)

    Jedi_Tigris Linked? Hm... I don't know. [face_whistling]
  21. Zane-Marit

    Zane-Marit Jedi Youngling star 3

    Jul 11, 2003
    Superb as always. I am very curious to see how her premonition turns out. A Qui Gon reunion would be awesome...
  22. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Feb 5, 2004
    Zane-Marit We'll have to see if that reunion ever happens. [face_whistling] Actually, I do have an idea for that premonition, but it will be a while in the writing. :p
  23. Layren

    Layren Jedi Master star 5

    Oct 28, 2003
    Kim do you know how many times I've read this little series? [face_love] I think I've read it at least twenty -- my heart just melts to pieces at the image of the big gundark holding a baby girl. Just what I need when I'm not feeling good :)
  24. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Feb 5, 2004
    Layren I'm so glad you liked it! I love writing this OC.

    Another vignette featuring this OC can be found here:

    [link=]With Your Life[/link]
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