Writers Race--- It Is Done!!!! * 1st--duskwings, * 2-DarthIshtar & Drabbo_Fett, 3-Indra

Okay, if we've gone over our entry as much as we can and can't find any double words, are we allowed to pm it to someone else to check over just to make sure?

 

Okay, I've been freaking out with this "lead" stuff.

::Bangs head as instructed.::

Due to a procrastinating, tyrannical blonde who is incapable of doing her own research (mom with a thesis due), I can't possibly finish this challenge. I've got a few hundred words and no way to finish.

So...

I AM WILLING TO JUDGE

 

A few hundred? Wow...

 

All right, I'll go first. 86 words if I haven't repeated any.

* * * * * *

?Ready?? Its voice permeates my consciousness.

?For???

?When Life as you know it at last ceases.?

?What does that mean?? Confusion and mounting despair reign.

?The Force has decreed an end to Light ? all Jedi will die.?

?Liar! Hold your tongue!?

Otherworldly cackling makes human flesh crawl. ?Blackness ? Darkness ? approaches.?

?Explain.?

?Why?? Malicious glee is heard.

Words flee, leaving silence. But something must be said. ?Because??

More mocking laughter. ?A singularly worthless response.?

Anger rises. ?Answer!?

?No.?

Unseen wind howls around me.

I am forever alone.

 

Final check on word repetition--sorry, I'm obsessing--does using a word and using it in a contraction count as a difference? E.g. "Have" and "not" vs. "Haven't"?

 

Yes, you can PM it to someone. And, yes both "have not " and "haven't" can be used. Just make sure you don't use those words anywhere else in the story.

 

Mine's done, but I'm waiting to see if any other entries get turned in before I absolutly have to turn mine in...

 

Eh, here goes nothing (word count 219?) --

Frozen tundra spread across nearly barren landscape, stretching out farther than most humanoid species eyes could see. Nothing remarkable or particularly noteworthy existed in this desolate place. Yet somehow icy Hoth had gotten picked for hiding Rebels running from an evil Empire. Between bitter chilling existence and relentlessly painful Imperial capture, Han sometimes wondered which would win getting to him. Possibilities weighed themselves, thoughts swirling round Solo?s mind. Finally he grudgingly concluded that Princess Leia had first shot. Bored and desperately needing distraction, Solo looked at Skywalker, one of two sentient beings currently present.

?How many different words are there for ice?? the smuggler asked, cold making his teeth chatter, body shiver uncontrollably.

?Why do you bring that up when nothing can be done about our conditions?? Luke responded exasperated, rubbing numb fingers repeatedly but not complaining.

Han?s characteristically sarcastic voice shot back, ?Just making conversation, kid. Ain?t like we have lots to do otherwise besides freeze.?

Luke?s face held great irritation. ?Focus here.?

?Farm boy, exactly what am I looking at besides white cold snow?? the unhappy Corellian demanded.

Silence followed until Skywalker?s simple statement, ?Watch.?

Talking ceased completely once daybreak reached endless untouched plains. Light reflected intensely until colored rays created a sparkling winter wonderland that neither man ever imagined with such beauty.

?Amazing.?

?Thought so.?

 

er, well, here goes nothing at something like 104 words.

Ice cold air filled Han's lungs as he attempted recuperation at
seeing Leia kiss Luke. It had hurt. In fact, more than was entirely
appropriate. What kind of an idiot am I? disparaging
thoughts flitted through that confused head. Nerfherder, you ain't
got a chance. Princesses and smugglers don't belong together.
Sighing Solo turned to board his one true love-the faithful
Millennium Falcon. She did not get huffy, leaving
him for kid Jedis. Scruffy-looking indeed! Those who passed by
heard disgruntled shouts, about women bruising egos, exiting this ship's cockpit accompanied with muffled Wookie growls compliments from co-pilot Chewbacca,
while engines powered up.

 

Okay, this'll be unreadable if I tweak it anymore. 211 words.

~*~

"I am in so much trouble if they find I'm shirking kitchen duty," panted Commander Skywalker.

"But snow!" responded his companion, grinning. "You come from a warm planet. Haven't visions of snowmen danced through your head since we landed on Hoth?"

"Men? Women, maybe," he laughed. "Angels. Beasts. Forts. Balls."

"Aha," she said, brown eyes sparkling mischieviously. "Battle?"

"What?"

"Short one? Please? Five minutes, tops. Royal's honor."

"Wouldn't be fair. Force sensitivity, and all."

"Right. Mister fancy Knight won't play games anymore."

An icy gust swept away any reply there might have been. Tongue protruding impishly, Princess Organa continued prodding Luke. "Then don't use those skills. Jedi's sacred promise. Tatooine farmboy's vow. Something." Tiny gloved hands began packing cold whiteness into spherical form. "Fun needs to happen here. Or Palpatine wins."

"You're really serious?"

"Deadly."

Afternoon sunlight glanced off distant hills, momentarily blinding both.

"Ouch..."

"Leia?"

"It's too bright..."

Luke's arms reached out before she'd collapsed.

"Highness!" Han's voice carried over winter's wailing winds.

Blond eyebrows raised. "Han? What's happened?"

"Caf overdose. Sorry, kid," muttered the smuggler. "Didn't want more problems. Just less ice."

Discerning Jedi Masters might've spotted redness upon General Solo's cheeks having little connection with chilly weather.

"I'll take her Worship inside."

"No! War!"

"Kill me tomorrow, sweetheart."

 

I wrote an auto-magical word-duplication checker in perl, so finding duplicates is easy for me ... feel free to PM me your piece if you'd like me to check for you. It's not a guaranteed thing, but it will prevent the obvious errors.

Kettch - Quick question -- does "made up words" include place names? And OC names?

Shaindl - Wow, nice story and no word duplicates! And I don't even think you used the word "the"!

Lady_Jedi_Carenix - Lovely story. Really lovely. I like the imagery of the sunrise -- it's very clear, in my head, of what's happening. Unfortunately, at least according to my checker, you have repeated several words at least once: had, and, for, that, nothing, shot, making, to, do, at, besides, cold, the, until, and that.

kateydidnt - Aw, poor Han. Only the poor Millenium Falcon loves him. And Chewie, of course. And Leia, if he'd stop to think about her. I'm happy to report that I don't see any duplicated words.

Wilhelmina - Uh, I'm a little confused as to what happened in the end -- Luke and Leia were about to have a snowball fight, and then Leia collapsed and ... Han said that she had a caf overdose that may or may not have been his fault? And then carried her back in? Well, in any case, I can't find any repeated words, and I found the first part of it inordinately cute. I'm a sucker for Luke and Leia stories.

-duskwings

 

Lady_Jedi,

Some words were found repeating in your story--for example, "and" and "cold".

But it was amusing Han dialogue/thoughts.

Remember you can submit two entries.

 

duskwings,

Any Star Wars word is legit, including planets. So if you are talking about Alderanian festivals, you can use the word "Alderanian". Made-up character names are allowed only if they are used somewhere in the Star Wars official literature. So, for example you can name a character Tarkin Organa but not ZZeedljfoe Ljfen.

 

duskwings: Hehe, yeah, pretty much. I ran out of words. Han slipped something in Leia's drink to help her loosen up a little, and it backfired. I was going to replace 'caf' with something else, but decided to leave it in. I know I can get pretty hopped up on caffeine. Aaanyway...

Thanks for the nice review!

 

Or maybe i will manage to do this.

 

Wait a sec ... so as long as the OCs names are composed of some first name and some last name that exist in Star Wars literature, then it's OK? I find that ... odd, to say the least, but I guess I'll start renaming them.

Can I use names that are in the dictionary, as well?

-duskwings

 

We're not supposed to repeat names, right? If not, Wilhemina, you used "Luke" twice.



Okay, my entry is 190, I think... not sure how grammatical it is though...

*

Space... ice... both could be equally cold and resided with great abundance within Hoth?s solar system. Princess Leia settled on frost covered chairs inside recreational room seventeen. Boots froze to the floor almost instantly here.

?Hey Your Highnessness!? Solo called from across frozen furniture.

?What now, Captain??

?When will we get those heaters High Command promised us weeks ago?? That insufferable grin painted roguish features.

Not finding enough warmth in her body, she utilized a long-suffering sigh instead. ?I am not my superiors, flyboy. Sorry, can?t help you.?

Seeing lovely features twisted in scowl, he said, ?Careful, frowns freeze from this weather.?

?Who fed you such misinformation??

?What, did I find something Milady doesn?t know?? Honorific based insults; his specialty, of course.

?Please, spare me nerf-herder language lessons.? Only below zero temperatures left Alderaan?s future Queen nothing but light banter. Force was it frigid!

?There haven?t been any supply ships for days...?

?Don?t even say...?

?Shouldn?t someone...?

?You were warned...?

?Hit some spacelanes...?

Strangled gasps exited his throat as diminutive hands began encircling Han?s neck. ?Nobody will leave until further notice. Clear??

Again breathing, he choked through an answer. ?Very...?

 

I did? Where?

 

duskwings,

Yep. Any word--including names--found in the dictionary or Star Wars literature is allowed.

 

Okay, after much checking, re-checking, and re-re-checking. Here my entry is. 192 words according to Microsoft Word.

**

Han awoke in biting wintry air known as Hoth?s frigid atmosphere. Many pilots complained about being chilly here, but hiding from malevolent Darth Vader was dangerous. While doing that, High Command used every available luxury.

Bitter winds blew across the man?s ice coated features, making him quiver. He could feel Luke stirring, yet couldn?t bring himself completely into today?s cold misery. Leia must be worried. notions similar to this floated around his thought-filled psyche. Blinking, they disappeared.

Words spoken earlier echoed throughout Han?s mind, creating a sardonic smile. Something regarding freezing? Looks like we might actually make it. Empty skies warmed Solo?s heart, childhood memories threatened their presence, although they?d been there all night. Recalling moments when striving for carefree lives ?

?What?s happening?? Luke?s groggy sleep-filled voice whispered, breaking through bittersweet reveries.

?I saved your butt again,? replied Solo smiling with amusement. ?No gratitude necessary, however, gloating rights are mine. Lightsaber, kid?? finished Millennium Falcon?s pilot, adjusting its position beside Skywalker?s prone body.

?Thanks,? muttered young Skywalker before passing-out once more.

Rescue calls came out of an unknown rebel flying toward them. ?Commander,? static followed and then, ?Do?read me??

Captain responded, ?Nice??

**

 

Here's mine. 200 something 8, 9, or 10, I don't have a word counter, except my finger... besides my head is spinning from this one.
---------------------------------

Writer's race challenge #4

Points of View
by jodiwent


Alliance :

Question ringing inside head; why am I here? My job not so important. Yet, a Rebel this being is. Looking for those, they are.

Closer troopers come. Remain still, or find me villains will. Not long in the world, does unknown one have. Blast into hiding place soon with laser guns. Shoot everyone, you know storming men always do. Scared. Good-buy.

Wait, gone? Never reviled Cookie's enclosure! Alive staying long time. Die old, under covers of bed, far days ahead. Hooray.

Joy ends quickly. Ships away.

Pryers whispered in cold, coldest place. Skin becoming translucent. Freezing, frozen, dead. See light. Love felt. Join Force.

Imperial :

Hunting. Searching. Smell enemy's fear. Only called by number, knows place. Objective achieved. Targets found. All killed.

Mistake made. Ice blocks falling. Foot caught. Friends leave without pause. Trapped like rodent. That left behind, no loss to the Empire. Just single of many. Frigid air shows misty breath slowing. Armor crushing chest. Lungs failing.

Mind still struggling. Flesh withering, lingering, dying. Curses exhaled. Regrets many. Final minutes closing. Hate reflected. While black darkness engulfs, cave's white shades hide body forever.

Hoth:

Planet's spirit senses, sad moments fleeting, go on infinitely. Both your stays endless. Feel our eternal stainless embrace of snow.

End?

 

Wilhelmina

Whoops, my bad. disregard that. I wasn't paying attention. Sorry. I was enjoying it too much...

 

pokey: No worries. You had me panicking there for a minute...

 

Sorry about this...


pokey1984's entry contains 'features' twice.

Healer_Leona's entry contains 'doesn't' twice.

jodiwent's entry contains 'place' three times.



At any rate I hope ya'll are having fun with the challenge.