JCC Embrace The FU - Formerly the STAR WARS IS BAD thread

Yeah, well, something something the Force something something, so it works fine.

 

Well, EW call it a "homemade lightsaber". Maybe he's more of a wannabe than we think, and his lightsaber really is supposed to be cumbersome and not very well done.

 

Upside-down cross!

 

Lovely colors.

 

Does anyone here have any experience fighting with broadswords? Maybe we should wait to see it in action.

 

The crossguard doesn't work because the emitter things are weak points that an opponent can just slice through (unless they use a lightsaber-resistant material or something, I guess). But whatever. I'm sure it'll be a minor problem in an otherwise perfect Abrams effort.

 

As I just said somewhere else: I highly doubt they'll use Revan, for the reasons Watto outlined above, but two things keep coming to mind: one, that recent rumor about a KOTOR remake/reboot would make more sense if they were planning to use the figure of Revan in the new movies; and two, they made and never used Revan and Bane CGI models to represent "the old Sith" in The Clone Wars and well, Darth Bane ended up appearing. So I don't think it's any likely, but if it happened I wouldn't be that surprised.

 

Broadswords aren't a worthy comparison because if your wrists rub against the hilt on that type of sword, you don't have a thick energy field sitting above your hand, only rendered metal.

 

These are movies where there are WWI dog fights in space and magic knights with laser swords and you're seriously getting hung up on the logistics of a cross guard they threw in for aesthetics?

 

Very true. Star Wars has always been about cool first, common sense second (if ever). Most egregious example: walkers.

 

Think of the children, Ramza

 

Yeah, but the thing is it doesn't look cool.

 

Oh yes it does.

 

You mean slow moving, highly vulnerable to a piece of rope attack vehicles aren't practical?

 

I know, right!?

 

On the other hand, there's the intimidation factor.

 

Phasma is rocking my world right now.

 

You sure you're not unsure about the feasibility of a soldier whose armor will blind everyone around her because of reflection?

 

This is compensated by proof that the Empire has embraced feminism by designing a uniform that not only accentuates a militaristic edge but also a woman's touch by designing it with Tiffany and Co radiant metal but also fitting it out with a chest cup for maximum protection AND comfort.

 

Guys I see prequels icons in there. Account for yourself before needless comms drama occurs and the worthless opinions of prequel fanboys (sorry, derogatory term) are further hurt when they realise Star Wars is distancing itself from the abortion that was Episodes I - III.

Think about it. Most fans don't really like them as much, Abrams and co basically went "HA" in a really loud and haughty fashion when it was put to them that the prequels are equally valid Star Wars; and if we also go 'HA' on the boards then we can sell their tears with a bit of added sugar as an isotonic sports drink.

Seriously guys, you should be paying me consultancy rates.

 

Maybe you'd get paid if you started a union.

 

If the Jedi are to live on, it technically does need to ignore the prequels as far as Midi-chlorians are concerned because Abrams would need to explain why, apart from Luke, there was not one soul between the events of Hope and Jedi that could be found who did have the necessary Midi-chlorian count. It won't even be addressed, the force within someone will merely be sensed.

 

Something pretty cool:

 

Vivienne, you're being pissy. Don't be pissy. We have an opportunity to hitch our wagons to the Abrams horse and abandon all pretense that the prequels ever existed. Why are you being That Guy, who says the Things?

//makes train noises

HYPE TRAIN IS LEAVING VIVEC GET ON BOARD.

 

What?

http://www.latimes.com/entertainmen...ar-wars-the-force-awakens-20150805-story.html

Here's a few things less offensive than the prequels:

1) The Holocaust and Nazism
2) The rise of Islamic State
3) Boko Haram kidnapping kids