Saga Chasing Redemption: RotS AU. Chapter 11 up!

Title: Chasing Redemption
Author: Estora
Timeframe: Clone Wars (just before RotS) onwards.
Characters: Obi-Wan Kenobi, Palpatine/Sidious, Padmé Amidala.
Pairings: None.
Genre: AU, angst, drama, suspense, action/adventure
Summary: Anakin Skywalker was dead. It was all terribly unfortunate, Sidious mused, since the boy had been the Chosen One. Really, Anakin's death messed up his plans dreadfully, the inconsiderate boy. Well, he thought, Kenobi is still alive. With the right manipulations, he could become a more than ample replacement...Chaptered. Rated T.
Notes: This is also being posted over at FanFiction.Net. That version will be exactly the same as this one, however it will be update more frequently. You may find the story at this link. There will not be a PM list for this fic, for which I apologise. I would love it if you could review, but don't worry, I don't expect everyone to do so. I don't believe in holding chapters hostage. I will update whether I get ten reviews or absolutely no reviews for a chapter. Thanks, guys, and I hope you enjoy Chasing Redemption!

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"Jedi, Sith, hero, villain -- you are all these things, Kenobi, and yet you are nothing! In the end, where is it you belong? You belong to neither the light nor the darkness, for you have forsaken both. You will forever -- stand -- alone!"

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[image=http://i131.photobucket.com/albums/p282/Isetnofret/obi-wan-1.jpg]

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Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by George Lucas. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

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CHASING REDEMPTION
Prologue


Anakin Skywalker was dead.

The HoloNet News called it the greatest tragedy to befall the Republic since its formation.

THE HERO WITH NO FEAR HAS FALLEN IN BATTLE!

It was all very dramatic, and frankly a bit ridiculous, Sidious thought as he sat down at his desk and pressed the tips of his fingers together, leaning back into his chair. It wasn't as though the boy's death was worth the hysterics of the Republic. It had all actually been embarrassingly anticlimactic, what with the boy's last words being, "Aim for the left wing, Arto? OHKRIFF I'M HITARRRGHH ?!"

There had been no body to recover, and the only thing left of General Skywalker's fighter pilot was the black box which the Jedi quickly whisked away, leaving the Republic in mourning.

All things considered, the boy's untimely passing was terribly unfortunate for Sidious, since he had been the Chosen One and all. Anakin's death messed up his plans dreadfully, which was just plain inconsiderate of him. Honestly. After spending years of manipulations and sweet-talk to groom him into the most powerful apprentice Sidious could ever have, Anakin had to go and get himself killed in a space battle more than three years into the Clone Wars. So close to the end, too.

GENERAL SKYWALKER IS DEAD!

Such a waste. Such loss of potential, too, now that Dooku was getting old.

Palpatine sighed and deferred a supposedly important call, then eyed the latest HoloNet headline with vague interest.

SKYWALKER KILLED IN ACTION; KENOBI ON HIS OWN!

Hmm, yes. Kenobi was on his own, and still very much alive. Hardly surprising, of course. He had always been the more?cautious of the Republic's Golden Team, so to speak, despite Sidious's attempts to have him taken care of. As it was, Kenobi was infuriatingly hard to dispose of.

Though perhaps it was a good thing after all that the Jedi Master was so good at living.

Sidious had once thought, following Maul's bisection on Naboo, that Kenobi would make an ample apprentice. It was just a pity that he was so disgustingly light. So utterly perfect. The model Jedi.

Positively revolting, really.

But somehow, Sidious knew. He could see that, beneath Kenobi's light side fa

 

Hello again! I'm glad you decided to post this here too, though I will probably follow the story on ff.net because it's farther on there.

 

Anakin's dead and Obi-Wan's alone. I hope he can resist Sidious. Great begining!

 

REVIEW REPLIES

GeneralKenobi7: Hey there! Thanks for reading and reviewing here as well as FFNet! Haha, yeah, it's probably best to follow it on FFNet, since this one won't be updated as frequently. Cheers!

Sara_Kenobi: Haha, thank you! I'm so glad you enjoyed the beginning, and I hope you like Chapter One!

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Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by George Lucas. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.


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CHASING REDEMPTION
Chapter One
Don't Feel


"Aim for the left wing, Arto? OHKRIFF I'M HITARRRGHH ?! Aim for the left wing, Arto? OHKRIFF I'M HITARRRGHH ?! Aim for the left wing, Arto? OHKRIFF I'M HITARRRGHH ?!"

It was sad in a way, Obi-Wan Kenobi thought stupidly, that for someone as outspoken as Anakin Skywalker, those were terrible last words.

Anakin Skywalker was dead.

The Chosen One; the Hero With No Fear. Anakin Skywalker. Dead.

It sounded wrong. Unbelievable.

A soft, tired sigh escaped his lips and he lowered himself to the couch, his hands pressed together to hide that almost imperceptible tremble.

How can you be so calm?

"Calm," Obi-Wan murmured, his voice drowned out by Anakin's voice recording. His voice sounded strange to himself; hoarse and strained. It was the first time he'd spoken since he'd heard the news.

Since he'd felt Anakin's existence ripped away from him like a limb being torn off by a savage, starved rancor beast.

"Aim for the left wing, Arto? OHKRIFF I'M HITARRRGHH ?!"

What did he hope to gain or accomplish, he wondered, sitting there and listening to Anakin's last moments over and over even though it was branded in his mind already, impossible to forget? Realisation? Acceptance? Even now, two days after the fact, Obi-Wan was expecting for Anakin to swagger through the door with that half-smirk as if to say, fooled you, Master.

"Obi-Wan," he corrected, pretending for a moment and believing it far too easily that Anakin really was there. "I'm not your Master anymore."

"Aim for the left wing, Arto? OHKRIFF I'M HITARRRGHH ?!" Anakin replied.

He wondered how Anakin must have felt, what he was thinking. He wondered what Anakin might have said if he was given those precious few moments. There were no imparting last words of wisdom, or heartfelt messages, or tearful confessions. Just agony.

"Aim for the left wing, Arto? OHKRIFF I'M HITARRRGHH ?!"

He wondered if any of this was real, or if it was just some elaborate prank constructed by Anakin as childish and cruel retribution for his own supposed 'death' at Jabiim more than a year ago. He wouldn't put it past him.

"Aim for the left wing, Arto? OHKRIFF I'M HI?"

Obi-Wan shut the recording off and left the room to impulsively make his way to Anakin's. There would have to be something on the pyre to burn ceremoniously in place of Anakin's body, Obi-Wan was absently reminded of as he looked around Anakin's freakishly quiet bedroom, so seldom used since the outbreak of war. Something symbolic. A set of robes, maybe, or that silver disc he kept by his bedside for years that looked blue and green and pink and yellow all at the same time when the sun hit it just right?a prized possession?his Padawan braid?

Obi-Wan distantly wondered what Anakin had actually done with his braid. He hadn't given it to his Master after his Knighting as Obi-Wan had arrogantly expected ? hoped ? which meant his former Padawan either kept it or gave it to someone else. Anakin would never have thrown that braid out; he was far too proud of it, loved it too dearly. Was far too attached to it.

He knew he should start to go through Anakin's belongings and methodically throw them out, as he did with Qui-Gon's things, until there was nothing left that even indicated another person had ever been here. But it felt wrong. It felt so hideously not right to be thinking about scouring Anakin's bedroom from top to bottom, when it s

 

Oh, poor Obi-Wan! That would be a terrible loss to bare. Fantastic update!

 

REVIEW REPLIES

Sara_Kenobi: Thank you so much for your review! I agree, poor Obi...here's Chapter Two, and I hope you enjoy it!

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CHASING REDEMPTION
Chapter Two
Don't Grieve


It was only two months into the Outer Rim Sieges but it was nearing the end of the third year into the Clone Wars, and after a while all of the battles began to sound the same to Obi-Wan.

"?Senator Organa wishes to use the Intervention on a survey of the situation in the Outer Rim Territories. I can lead a task force, but we still need a pilot."

Mace paused to look around the Council for suggestions.

Pilot, Obi-Wan repeated in his mind, and reality tilted for a moment. "Anakin can ?"

He caught his breath and broke off abruptly, and an awkward silence clogged the air. He closed his eyes and pressed a shaking hand to his forehead, feeling the weight of eleven pitying gazes turning on him.

Anakin couldn't. He was dead.

No-one seemed to know quite what to say, so it was the Grandmaster who broke the silence.

"Feel your pain, we do, Obi-Wan," Yoda consoled. "Understand, we do. A terrible loss, this has been. But above your attachment you must be, if on this Council you are to remain. One with the Force, young Skywalker is now. Mourn him do not. Miss him, do n?"

Yoda never got to finish, for Obi-Wan abruptly stood up and swiftly left the stunned Council Chambers without a word or a backwards glance. The door slammed shut behind him.

That was what Obi-Wan wished he had done, but didn't have the strength of will to do so nor possessed the impertinence. He stayed seated, silent and still, and listened to Yoda finish, then tonelessly said "I understand, Master," as he imagined the door slamming behind his retreating figure. Don't mourn him, don't miss him ? Anakin was barely gone three days and that was all Yoda had to say to him? Anakin would have walked out, Obi-Wan thought dully. Anakin wouldn't have listened to that.

The rest of the meeting had little impact on Obi-Wan. There was something about Grievous, and the war, and the Outer Rim sieges, and Obi-Wan knew he should have been paying attention but all he could hear was don't mourn him, don't miss him and those horrid last words playing over and over again in his mind?

"?rumours of the Separatists blockading the graveyard planet Boz Pity, but so far no confirmations?"

Pay attention, Obi-Wan thought, but he couldn't and instead just sat there in a dull daze, not even moving when the meeting was adjourned and the Council Members began filing out, every now and then casting a sympathetic look over towards him. Obi-Wan left his seat and waited by a window, hiding his lightly trembling hands in the sleeves of his robe. He heard the door close except he wasn't alone. Go away, he thought. Go away, Mace, I don't?I don't want to talk to anyone, just leave, please?

"Obi-Wan?"

"Don't mourn him. Don't miss him," Obi-Wan murmured as though he hadn't heard the Korun Master, unable to even gather the strength to sound bitter. "He hasn't even had his ceremony yet. It hasn't even been three days. How can he expect me to?"

Mace said nothing. Obi-Wan turned to him, eyes vacant.

"There was nothing left, Mace," Obi-Wan said. "Nothing but the black box. No body means no physical proof of demise, how can we be sure that he's dead? Why are you so quick to rule out possible survival? Have you learned nothing from my case at Jabiim? Anakin could be alive, hurt somewhere! The ?"

"Obi-Wan ?"

"? bond is broken but that doesn't mean anything, it could be a Force suppressant ?"

"Obi-Wan!"

Obi-Wan fell silent.

"Listen to me. We did find something else. He's gone, Obi-Wan. You have to accept it."

"What did you find?"

Mace sighed wearily, looking old. "I didn't want to be the one to tell you this," he muttered. "It was part of his arm."

"The ?"

"The durasteel one," Mace confirmed.

Obi-Wan's eyes flickered. That didn't prove anything, it was just durasteel, that stuff could survive

 

This is FANTASTIC.

I just can't tell you how well you've captured Obi-wan here. I love it.

 

This is certainly an unusual and very interesting story. Really like what I've seen and will keep an eye out for further updates. Thanks for sharing it on these boards.

 

I always wondered what would have happened if Anakin had died and what that would do to Obi-Wan. Either way, he seems to always see his former Padawan in flames. I think what I am wondering about right now is what Padme must be going through right now. This is a very interesting post. Keep it up.

 

REVIEW REPLIES

Takianna: Thank you so much for your review! The fact that you think I've captured Obi-Wan well is an amazing compliment. I hope you enjoy the next chapter!

Darth_Nellie: Thank you! I'm so glad you're enjoying Chasing Redemption so far. I hope you like the next chapter, and thanks for your review!

darth_treyvah: Haha, you'll find out about Padme in this next chapter. Thank you so much for your review, and I hope you enjoy the coming chapter!

 

CHASING REDEMPTION
Chapter Three
Don't Forgive


Late afternoon on the fourth day after Anakin's death found Obi-Wan waiting outside Senator Amidala's door in the luxurious apartments of 500 Republica. It was the third time he had rung the intercom and still there was no answer, yet he didn't leave for he could feel, through the Force, that Padmé was home. Common sense told him to leave her alone ? there was no question as to why she was ignoring him. The atmosphere on his way to her residence thickened with grief with every step he came closer and there was no doubt that she was at the centre of the suffering. Any other person or Jedi would have turned away, would have been too overwhelmed by the raw emotion and raised their shields to cut themselves off completely, so they wouldn't have to feel it as though it was as painful and agonising as their own.

Obi-Wan kept his shields down.

On the fourth ring, Obi-Wan was greeted by C-3PO. "Good afternoon, Master Kenobi," it said, sounding far too cheerful than was absolutely necessary.

"Good afternoon," Obi-Wan replied shortly for the sake of being polite. "Is Senator Amidala available?"

"I'm afraid she has taken ill, sir, and is unable to see anybody. May I take a message for her?"

Ill? More like ill with grief. Obi-Wan shook his head. "Tell her Obi-Wan Kenobi is here and urgently needs to speak with her."

Was it possible for a droid to look insulted? "Master Kenobi, I just informed you that she is unwell and is unable to ?"

"I heard you, but I would very much appreciate it if you could give her my message," Obi-Wan interrupted impatiently.

"Sir ?"

"Immediately."

"Well, I never?" the droid chattered indignantly as it shuffled away. Obi-Wan sighed. A droid with a personality ? only Anakin could have come up with something like that. That thought made him smile, just a bit, and instinct told him to turn towards Anakin and dryly make fun of it, until he reminded himself that Anakin was dead. The smile disappeared, and the wisecrack died in his throat.

C-3PO returned quickly. "The Senator has received your message and requested I show you in. Would you like some refreshments, Master Kenobi?"

"That's really quite unnecessary," Obi-Wan muttered and pushed past the indignant C-3PO to find Padmé in the main room.

She looked a mess. Hair knotted and tangled, half out of whatever hairstyle it had been in, and face red and splotchy with tears, Padmé Amidala had never looked quite so unattractive. She looked up at him when he came closer with red, pain-stricken eyes, and Obi-Wan nearly keeled over with the wave of emotion. "Obi-Wan ?" she gasped out, "everyone's been saying ? the HoloNet says ? please tell me it's not?not?"

It's true, he tried to say, but his throat closed up and he looked down to let the silence answer for him.

"No," Padmé denied, shaking her head. "No. I don't believe you. I won't. Anakin couldn't ? he's not ? he's the best pilot in the Republic. He isn't ?"

"Padmé?"

"No!" she shrieked, and clutched at her hair tightly. "Don't ? don't ? he can't ? no?oh, Anakin, Anakin ?"

Obi-Wan had been around grieving women before. He sat down beside her, close enough for their knees to touch, and he rested a hand on her shuddering back. He should have said something, anything, but the words were caught in his throat.

"Why are you here?" she finally managed to get out, and Obi-Wan swallowed.

"I came to ask something of you. I know you and Anakin are ? were close." Just how close, he was almost certain he knew, but didn't say. "I came to ask if you have any knowledge of the whereabouts of his Padawan braid."

Padmé brushed the tears from her cheeks. "Why?"

That alone was enough to confirm that she had it, but what was he supposed to tell her? That he intended to burn it? Or that maybe, once he had the precious coil of hair in his hands, he intended to keep it? "It?it may be the only organic part of him left. His ceremony will be held in a few days?"

Somehow, that was all he co

 

just found the story. What I have read wll done. I live it.

please update soon. Thanks

 

You are doing a fabulous job. I'm very intrigued by this story. I think it maybe one of the best I've ever read. I've been suggesting it to friends to read too! Keep it up!

 

Kind of another emotional bomb there. I'm glad Obi-Wan let Padme keep the braid. Fantastic update.

 

It was so tempting, just to reach out and grasp that thin coil of hair, to feel the soft remnants of Anakin's Force Signature warm him and comfort him. So tempting, to just snatch it from her hand and hide it in his inner pocket alongside the Force-sensitive stone Qui-Gon had given him, close to his heart so he would never be apart from him again. He could take it.

I think this says a lot about Obi-Wan right here: both his intellectual and analytical nature, and the very collected way he deals with his emotions and past connections. I can totally see him being a collector of a few objects to do with his past and his few personal emotional ties.

He could take it away from Anakin's wife, and from Anakin's unborn child ? from the woman he had seen fit to bequeath it to, from the child he left behind without ever knowing.

Anakin would hate Obi-Wan if he took it away. Obi-Wan would hate himself.

"No," he protested gently, and curled her fingers back around the braid, even as his heart shattered in his chest. "Anakin would have wanted you to keep it. I don't?I don't want it to be?please. Keep him safe."

He didn't want it to be burned, not that he would have let that happen. At least with Padmé, it was with the person Anakin wanted it to be with [...]

I think this also says a lot about Obi-Wan as well. Even the feeling of betrayal afterward. But these were really well written standout parts.

 

REVIEW REPLIES

littleobiwankenobi: Thank you so much for your review, both here and on FFNet! I'm so pleased you're enjoying the story.

Takianna: Haha, thank you very much for reviewing, here and on FFNet -- I deeply appreciate you taking the time. I'm so happy you're intrigued by the story!

Sara_Kenobi: Thank you!!

darth_treyvah: I'm really trying to get into Obi-Wan's head with this story. Do you know how hard it is to write him? He's such a tricky man to pin down. I'm so glad you thought those two parts in particular were well done; I laboured over them and rewrote them so many times it's not funny...XD Thank you so much for your review, and I hope you enjoy the next chapter!

 

CHASING REDEMPTION
Chapter Four
Don't Cry


Somehow he found himself waiting outside the Supreme Chancellor's office.

This was a phenomenon all on its own, as there was no rational reason for him to be waiting outside the Chancellor's office considering that Obi-Wan was not particularly fond of Palpatine. Aside from the fact that he was a politician and politicians were Not To Be Trusted, the man had positively appalling taste in interior design, what with the red carpets and Sith-like statues all over the place. It was disturbing. Why Anakin went there every other tenday was beyond Obi-Wan. There wasn't anything particularly appealing about the setting, besides Palpatine's smooth tongue. The man was practically an autocrat, anyway, a complete subversion of everything Obi-Wan believed in.

And yet, there he was. There he was, hoping for some insane reason to talk to the man whom Anakin had always trusted, always valued his friendship with, more than he had with Obi-Wan. However much Obi-Wan disliked Palpatine, the man had cared for Anakin, and vice versa. Palpatine had been, as much as he loathed to admit it, another one of Anakin's mentors. Probably, he thought bitterly, a preferred one. Unbecoming of you, this jealousy is, he imagined Yoda rightfully scolding him. The Grandmaster was right, of course: completely inappropriate. Jedi didn't get jealous.

Don't mourn him.

Don't miss him.

Obi-Wan closed his eyes as the Red Guards commed Palpatine. Security was tight these days, naturally at the behest of the Supreme Chancellor himself.

"Allow Master Kenobi entry," Palpatine's static voice came over the commlink. The Red Guards on either side of the door stood aside, and Obi-Wan went in.

Like Padmé's apartment, the chamber reeked of Anakin's presence, and Obi-Wan felt himself turning to throw off some teasing comment about his collection of politicians for friends before again reminding himself, his heart pounding painfully in his chest, that Anakin was dead.

It still didn't feel real.

It was clear the Supreme Chancellor was grieving. Not unlike Padmé, his eyes were red-rimmed and a half-empty box of tissues resided on the desk. So he, too, had been crying, and Obi-Wan bit back the irrational wave of envy. "Thank you for seeing me, Your Excellency," Obi-Wan murmured instead. "I realise you are busy."

"Busy?" Palpatine repeated. "Oh, yes, I suppose. More so these days ? lately I have neglected my work, and taken the time to grieve out of respect for the fallen." He sighed. "I am sorry for the Order's loss, Master Kenobi. Anakin was a remarkable young man."

The Order's loss. Not Obi-Wan's. "Yes, he was," Obi-Wan agreed absently. And perhaps if I'd been with him, we would not be talking now.

It was not egotism which spurred his thoughts; Anakin was far superior in, well, all forms of combat than Obi-Wan, but Obi-Wan's presence usually stopped the boy from taking risks. Obi-Wan had been the water to balance Anakin's fire. One could not exist without the other.

His guilt hung in the silence, and somehow, with that uncanny politician's ability of his, Palpatine seemed to know exactly what Obi-Wan was thinking, and startled him with his words. "It was hardly your fault, Master Kenobi ?"

"Not my fault? Of course it was not! Not directly ? I should have been there. I should have been at his back like I always promised I would be. He would have been less reckless ?" Obi-Wan broke off and let out a humourless laugh. "Less reckless," he scoffed. "Force, listen to me. Everything Anakin ever did was reckless, regardless of whether or not I was there."

Like tearing after Dooku without waiting for Obi-Wan. Like getting himself killed in a space battle, the last place anyone would have expected the legendary fighter to perish.

Like marrying Padmé Amidala. And getting her pregnant.

Curiously, the Chancellor's expression was not questioning ? instead, it was almost pitying. Palpatine sighed again, the sound of an aging man, and

 

Five days after Anakin Skywalker's death, Obi-Wan Kenobi buried his face in his hands, and cried.

At this point, I think I'm ready to cry along with him. I'm so into this story! LOVE IT! I'm inspired by your writing. It makes me want to write. KEEP UP THE GREAT WORK!

 

I think that conversation opened the wounds for Obi-Wan. Fantastic update!

 

REVIEW REPLIES

Takianna: Thank you, thank you, thank you! I'm so, so happy that I am inspiring your writing - that is a wonderful compliment in itself. I'm so glad that you're enjoying the story, and thank you so much for reviewing!

Sara_Kenobi: I agree - Palpatine knows exactly where to drive the knife in. Thank you for your review, and I hope you enjoy this chapter!

 

CHASING REDEMPTION
Chapter Five
Don't Miscalculate


Sidious was a man of many things, but he was not, never had been, and never would be a liar.

He was, as much as he loathed admitting it, similar to the Jedi in that respect. Jedi didn't lie, per se, they only told half-truths, or certain points of views. It was one of the limited things Sidious admired the rigid, pathetic Order for; their flawless ability to twist the truth to suit their purposes.

No. He was not a liar. Lies were for the uncivilised and unintelligent. With lies, one could get caught, for one lie spawned off several more to cover for the first one, and could never be kept track of. The truth was far more sophisticated.

Of course I knew, he'd told Kenobi. He trusted me with many things.

Many things, but not everything. Anakin hadn't actually said anything of his marriage to Senator Amidala to the kindly Chancellor. Not that it was the galaxy's best-kept secret or anything: Padmé Amidala had been his Queen. He had been her ambassador to the Senate. Naboo was his home. Palpatine had acquaintances among the civil clergy ? Anakin's secret ceremony had never been a secret from him. He knew, and he had always known. He had only pretended ignorance to spare Anakin discomfort in the hopes that one day, he would be able to spring this information on him and strengthen the bonds of trust.

Sadly, that plan was ruined when the boy inconsiderately let himself be burned to death in a space battle, but there was no point in letting valuable information go to waste.

Of course I knew. He trusted me with many things.

After all, he didn't actually say Anakin told him, just that Anakin had trusted him.

He would have expected someone with Kenobi's reputation for intelligence to have picked up on that subtle twist of words, but grief, it was said, did strange things to people. Perhaps later Kenobi would realise. Or perhaps he would not ? either way, it would give Sidious a much-needed insight into the Jedi Master's character.

Reluctant as he was to admit it, Sidious knew only the superficial about his new apprentice, and this was not acceptable. He knew that Kenobi was a master of Soresu. He knew that Kenobi adhered to the Jedi Code. He knew that Kenobi despised politicians and politics, despite his flair for negotiation. He knew that Kenobi was so light that almost hurt to be around him. But around that light swirled the agony of a man who had lost his brother and friend, a darkness that no-one, not the Order and certainly not Kenobi himself, knew existed. It was subtle, it was fleeting, but it was there.

There was only one more thing Sidious knew with absolute certainty: Kenobi was nothing like Anakin, and could not be seduced the same way. Anakin had far more brute strength in the Force than Kenobi and an unpredictable temper, a benefit to Sidious in that the boy was gullible and open to manipulation, but Force the boy had been thick-headed. No self-control whatsoever. Sweet-talk and playing on his fears was the key, but Kenobi, well, that was another realm altogether.

Naturally it made his task that much more difficult. Anakin was an easy target, and Kenobi?Kenobi was a conundrum. A man of a thousand complexities and simplicities, everything and nothing at once. He was the ultimate Jedi, a beacon of the light ? how much fun it would be, then, to twist such a fine specimen to his cause?if only he could find his weakness.

Everyone, Sidious knew, had a weakness. Anakin's was his fear, a poison that rotted him from the inside out with every breath he took. Darth Plagueis's had been his overconfidence, his narrow-sightedness ? his inability to see past the end of his nose. The Jedi Order's was their refusal to change with the times, reliance on outdated codes and dismissal of human nature ? much to Sidious's benefit. Dooku's was his inflated ego ? too sure of himself to see that his usefulness was almost expired, too certain to remem

 

review, love the story. Hopeful it will not get dark for Obi. I still believe the force loves him, that why he never can turn!!

 

OH YEAH! You posted more! This story is so awesome. I know I'm blathering on like an idiot, but I like it too much not to!

 

REVIEW REPLIES

littleobiwankenobi: Thank you so much for reviewing! It's very difficult to imagine Obi-Wan as dark, isn't it? Still, the Force may love a man, but it can't help him when darkness as cold as death twists everything he knows...

Takianna: Haha, yeah, I posted more - and more again! XD I'm so overwhelmed you are enjoying the story. I hope you like this next chapter!

 

CHASING REDEMPTION
Chapter Six
Don't Apologise


The first thing Obi-Wan became aware of was that someone was patting him on the shoulder. Strange, he thought, and wondered where he was and why his eyes were blurry and cheeks were wet. The second thing he realised was that he was sitting down ? even stranger, because he had been sure he had been standing up when ? when ?

Oh.

More tears spilled down his cheeks, and he realised that he was clutching a tissue in his hand tight enough that his fingernails were almost drawing blood on his palm. Crumpled up, soggy, and utterly ruined, Obi-Wan still brought the miserable tissue up to his face and wiped away the wetness. That person was still patting his shoulder

Anakin.

Dead.

And this time it was real. The grief was real, the tears were real, the pain ? and although most of it was safely released into the Force, remnants still clung to his heart. Oh, Anakin, Anakin ?

Another sob caught in his throat as he tried to stand. He was pushed back gently into the chair.

"There, now, Master Kenobi ? think it would be prudent if you stayed seated yet."

That smooth, lilted voice infiltrated the haze.

Palpatine? Oh, blast?

He couldn't even remember how he'd gotten there, and he'd just?oh, Force. How embarrassing.

"How do you feel?"

The soft prompt made Obi-Wan open his mouth to instinctively say, I'm fine, but the lie wouldn't form. It hurt his throat to speak. "Would you like the truth, or what I'd planned on telling you?" he managed to croak out, even succeeding in weaving a hint of his trademark dry drawl into the question.

Above him, he felt rather than saw Palpatine's mouth curve upwards. "If what you'd planned on telling me was that you are fine, I would not believe you anyway." Palpatine's eyes glinted in slight amusement. "The truth would be nice."

"Truthfully, Chancellor, I'm feeling rather wretched at the moment," he said, and willed back another wave of tears. Anakin would have scoffed at that weak attempt at humour. Were he alive.

"It is only to be expected," Palpatine soothed. "Anakin's death has affected us all very deeply."

Obi-Wan felt his throat close up again, and let the silence bring back his awareness. He realised his right cheek was throbbing painfully, and Obi-Wan winced and pressed a hand to the tender flesh. "You hit me."

He sounded dazed to his own ears. Palpatine, at least, had the grace to look embarrassed. "Yes, well, I am terribly sorry, Master Kenobi, but you ?"

To his own surprise and against his will, Obi-Wan felt the corners of his lips curve upwards a little and let his hand fall from his stinging face. "It's all right, Chancellor. I think?I think I needed it. Though it occurs to me that you're wasted in the Senate, with a blow like that," he added dryly. "You could have made a killing in the ring."

"Yes, that's what my last would-be assassin told me as well," Palpatine agreed thoughtfully, and despite his efforts Obi-Wan found himself smiling.

Smiling, and the embarrassment flooded him again in a swift second. Force, had he just sobbed like a child in front of the Supreme Chancellor of the Republic? Heat rose in his cheeks which he quickly pushed down. Clearing his throat and straightening, Obi-Wan attempted to regain a semblance of composure. "I feel I must apologise, Chancellor, for my?display, just now ?"

"Master Kenobi," Palpatine interrupted quickly, his eyebrows drawn into a frown, "before you provide an unnecessary apology, please be honest with me: was that the first time you have cried since Anakin passed on?"

Obi-Wan blinked, and felt his hand clench instinctively around the tissue again. Palpatine eyed him evenly, caringly, and the gentle tone of his voice struck Obi-Wan with that inexplicable need to tell him that yes, it was the first time he'd cried since Anakin died, the first time he'd actually felt it, but Obi-Wan stayed silent, and pretended to be lost in memory.

Obi-Wan was not an idiot, despite his emotiona