In an alternate universe where Clara wasn't the Impossible Girl and events were different until... Doctor Who: Clara Oswald Doesn’t Exist The Cybermen closed in on Clara Oswald. “Stop! You can’t kill me,” she called out. “Incorrect.” “I’m a target of strategic value. Alive, I’m a tactical advantage. Dead, I’m your biggest mistake. You don’t know who I am.” One of the Cybermen scanned her. “You are Clara Oswald. You are human. You are unimportant.” “Incorrect!” Clara said, deciding to continue along the line she was going along. “That is what you’re supposed to think. That is what everybody thinks.” “You are Clara Oswald.” “Clara Oswald is a cover story, a disguise. There is no Clara Oswald.” “Identify.” The Cyberman seemed a little incredulous, if a Cyberman could inflict its voice so. “Oh, don’t be so slow, it’s embarrassing. Who could fool you like this? Who could hide right under your nose? Who could change their face any time they want? You see, I am not Clara Oswald. Clara Oswald has never existed!” “Identify!” “I am the Doctor.” The three Cybermen came closer. “Well where to start? I was born on the planet Gallifrey, in the constellation of Kasterborous. I'm a Time Lord, but my Prydonian privileges were revoked when I stole a time capsule and ran away. Currently pilot a Type 40 Tardis. I've been married four times, all deceased. My children and grandchildren are missing, and I assume, dead. I have a non-Gallifreyan daughter created via genetic transfer. How much more do you need? I'm the Doctor.” “This information is not proof. We require proof.” “Proof?” Clara asked rhetorically. “I’ll give you proof.” She grabbed a fob watch from one of her pockets. “Get ready to scan me again.” She then flipped the fob watch, or rather chameleon arch open. Golden energy rippled over her. “Scanning,” the first Cyberman said. It found something. “Bicardial circulation system… Time Lord physiology detected!” “Told you.” Clara said. “Capture her! Capture the Time Lady!” Clara then quickly made herself scarce. Meanwhile the Doctor and Missy were still staring at each other. “Well?” Missy asked. “Well, what?” the Doctor asked. “Look at them! My boys!” “Cybermen in broad daylight? You think people won’t notice?” Indeed, people were noticing, and taking selfies… “Photos with the big metal men, one pound,” Missy said. The Doctor sighed as people threw coins into her hat. ‘Pudding Brains!’ he thought. “New York, Paris, Rome, Marrakesh, Brisbane, Glasgow. Everywhere. Anywhere! Me and my boys, we’re going viral!” The Doctor noticed something, the Calvary, in the form of UNIT, had shown up! Petronella Osgood was leading a group of soldiers to the area where the Cybermen had been reported. She had found the Doctor! She lead them to the spot. “Would you like me to take a picture? Sorry, selfies are never as good, are they? And you're having a lovely moment. Hang on!” She grabbed the phone off Missy. “No!” Missy cried. “Nice bow tie,” the Doctor commented. “Bow ties are cool,” Osgood said. “Big smiles, and now!” The soldiers around her drew their weaponry from their backpacks. Kate Stewart then stepped forward. “Afternoon,” she said to one of the Cybermen. “You’ve picked a lovely day for it. My, don’t you look shiny.” She turned to the Doctor. “New hair?” “Bit of a trim,” the Doctor responded. “Might want to do your roots,” Kate commented. The Doctor sighed as Missy was brought forwards by a couple of UNIT soldiers. Kate then addressed the Cybermen. “Kate Stewart. Divorcee, mother of two, keen gardener, outstanding bridge player. Also Chief Scientific Officer, Unified Intelligence Taskforce, who currently have you surrounded.” “Human weaponry is not effective against Cyber technology,” one of the Cybermen objected. “Sorry, you left this behind on one of your previous attempts,” Kate said as she threw down a severed Cyberman head. “So now that I have your attention, welcome to the only planet in the universe where we get to say this. He's on the payroll.” “Am I?” the Doctor asked. “Well, technically,” Kate clarified. “How much?” “Shush. Any questions.” Suddenly, the Cybermen thumped their chests. They all took off in flight. “Back, everyone. Back!” a soldier called out. Behind them, the dome of St. Pauls opened with more Cybermen emerging from it. “Is it supposed to do that?” Petronela Osgood asked. “Is that new.” “A sun roof on Saint Pauls?” the Doctor asked sarcastically. “I’d say that’s new.” “There’s going to be mass panic,” Kate said. “Everyone in London can see that.” “Everyone in London just clapped and went whee,” the Doctor commented. “Hush. I’m trying to count.” “Eighty Seven, I think,” Osgood said. “OCD.” “Ninty One,” Missy stated. “Queen of Evil.” ‘Really Missy!’ the Doctor thought. “How could Saint Paul's be full of ninety one Cybermen and nobody noticed?” Kate asked. “Dimensional engineering,” the Doctor answered. “One space folded inside another. Bigger on the inside. Easy if you're a Time Lord.” “Mostly deploying north,” Osgood explained. “A smaller number west.” “Yep, but one straight up,” the Doctor added. “So, ninety one isn’t a coincidence?” Kate asked. “Of course, it isn’t,” the Doctor said. He took the device off Osgood. “Ninety one areas of significant population density in the British Isles,” Osgood said. “That's one Cyberman for every city and major town. It's happening everywhere, all over the world, right now.” The Cybermen above exploded. “It exploded?” Kate asked. “More than that. Cybermen don't just blow themselves up for no good reason, dear. They're not human.” “If it's not exploding, what's it doing?” “Pollinating. Falling like rain into the cracks of the Earth,” Missy explained.
