I Saw a Midget Stripper Last Night

It's true! Her name was "Little Lacey" and she was billed as the world's smallest stripping sensation. It was a celebration for some friends' birthdays and we figured what better way to celebrate than to go to the tittie bar and see a midget stripper.

I can now state that I have had a midget pinch a $5 bill off my face with her butt cheeks.

I am finally a man.

 

Well done old chap.

 

That's incredible!

*bows down lowwwww*

 

Did you get midget STD's?

 

I'm proud to say that I saw the headline and automatically knew it was Snerd

 

That's an un-PC term...

...they prefer to be called "erotic dancers."

 

My girlfriend did mention to me that some guy got caught upperdecking a toilet at the club she was at last night.









Really though, I think that she runs around a lot between here and Milwaukee, Mort. I see ads for her all the time, and I think she hits every club between Chicago and Milwaukee too.

 

I can now state that I have had a midget pinch a $5 bill off my face with her butt cheeks.


That's just disgusting. Who knows where Mort's face has been??

 

Well, we know of one place where it's been.

 

It was weird too. She was very frumpy and kind of built like my 16 month old son. Her butt was about as big as mine though, and yet she had no cottage cheese. It was fascinating.

 

Okay, this has gone from mildly disturbing to downright ******-up.

 

Where else did you think it would go? I think she was just at the Admiral Theatre not that long ago. I should have gone and seen her so we could have compared notes on her.

 

Where else did you think it would go?

Okay, you got me there.

 

I know a girl who used to work at the Admiral.

I was at "On the Border" in Racine.

 

Did you take any pictures?

I'd really like to see some!

 

You have inspired my next Google image search, Mort.

 

Tell me you got a lap dance.

 

Of course I got a lap dance. This is a midget stripper we're talking about. I could never have passed up such an opportunity.

 

That's an un-PC term...

...they prefer to be called "erotic dancers

So he saw a vertically challenged erotic dancer.

 

Did she have fake boobies? Like Chelsea Charms sized?

 

Midgets rule. Just as long as they're not being exploited by the media, I'm fine. Personally you should have doubled the 5.

 

I thought you were married!

 

LMAO, best thread in a long time. Bravo mort.

 

Personally you should have doubled the 5.

I did for her second performance. She also held a plastic cup between her boobs and people threw crumpled up dollar bills into it.

I thought you were married.

I am.

 

I see you've finally pursued your lifetime dream, but now you should set your sights even higher, er, lower.