[Mods' Time Trials] Non-Sibling Rivalry

Author: CaraJinn
Era: Prequels
Genre: Humor
Characters: Jar-Jar Binks and a young R2D2, with Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan lurking nearby
Summary: Jar-Jar wants to become a hero and his repeated attempts are somewhat overshadowed by someone else saving the day.
Author's notes: Written as a part of Mod's Time Trials, 24 hrs challenge.

Spoiler: Prompt

24D
1. Your TV trope is: Comically Lopsided Rivalry
2. Your required line of dialogue is: "I don't know how to answer that question."
3. Your picture is:



(Original Link: https://pixabay.com/photos/splash-jump-dive-sink-swim-shore-863458/)

..........


Non-Sibling Rivalry

"Master, I think we have a problem," Obi-Wan Kenobi's eyebrows were beetled tightly together as he spoke to his Master. They were sitting quietly in a corner of the main compartment of Queen Amidala's ship.

"A problem?" Qui-Gon Jinn asked in mild astonishment. "The Sith seems to have appeared after being extinguished for a millennia, we're on our way to a planet occupied by the Trade Federation and the two of us are supposed to protect the Queen amidst something that may very well end up as a full scale war and you count that as a problem?"

"Not that, Master. The problem is over there."

A vague nod with his head indicated the corner where Jar-Jar Binks was polishing the dome of a blue and metallic R2 unit. The little droid seemed to be quite unhappy about the process and sharp burbling noises came from it's sound board. A sharp sound came from the little droid as excess oil flowed down it's sensors and Jar-Jar yelped as a small electric shock sparked his hand.

"Mesa no like'a maccanic", Jar-Jar declared, and rose with as much dignity as a clumsy Gungan was able to present. "Mesa go getting Queen Amadala something to drink."

"Does this mean that we have to save the Queen right away?" Obi-Wan whispered.

Qui-Gon Jinn shook his head reluctantly: "I don't know how to answer that question. It shouldn't be necessary…but…"

A high rattling noise followed by a loud 'splash' indicated that some rescue might very well be needed. The sight of the lanky gungan sprawled on the deck surrounded by goblet and a little pool of muja juice confirmed the suspicion.

The small R2 unit created a sound, very much alike a human giggle. A sharp glance from Jar-Jar didn't do much to stifle it. The gungan managed to collect the goblets and tray without creating any more disasters and disappeared into the pantry again. Quietly the little droid rolled forward, a slim hose appeared from one of it's side panels and the excess liquid on the deck was sucked up and disappeared into the droid's sturdy body. A long arm shot out, grabbed a napkin which was sprayed with some mysterious detergent and the remaining stains of the juice was dried off. Then it returned quietly to it's corner again.

Qui-Gon raised an amused eyebrow.

Slightly wobbly footsteps could be heard from the pantry and once again Jar-Jar appeared, with a new tray.

"Oh, no…" Obi-Wan sighed.

The assumed detergent must have contained a certain amount of oil because just as the gungan stepped on the newly cleaned spot, he lost balance again. In a comical way his long limbs (and ears) lifted towards the ceiling and the tray with all it's liquid contents was on it's way towards the floor again.

A small humming sound could be heard and the little R2 unit shot out from it's corner, one 'hand' grabbing the tray, the other the jug with muja-juice and two more spindly appendices caught the goblets mid-air.

The artefacts were neatly re-established on the tray and the R2 unit rolled purposefully towards the Queen's compartment.

Delighted female voices could be heard as the door opened and a handmaiden received the tray and the words '…so cute' could be heard clearly.

"Mesa no like'a maccanic," Jar-Jar grumbled and retreated to a bench on the other side of the compartment. The droid whistled a merry tune.

…….

The vegetation on the ground was dense and some places even almost impenetrable. The small group was lead by the gungan, keeping a (more or less) steady course towards the nearest lake from which Gungan City could be reached. Every now and then he disappeared in the brush after getting his long feet tangled in some aggressive part of the native flora. After the fifth 'disappearance' which lasted noticeably longer than the preceding ones an annoyed burbling could be heard from the rear part of the group. The little R2 unit activated it's jet motor and came flying low over the brush, landing by the gungan's side. Soon after the sound of a small vibro saw could be heard, and the gungan re-emerged from the branches.

"Mesa no like'a maccanic," he sighed, but allowed the droid to stay by his side, sweeping aside the brushes with a long and sharp saw, creating a trail for the human group.

……

The lake appeared at last, and with a delighted shriek Jar-Jar somersaulted up into the air and hit the water with a huge splash. Seconds later he emerged again with a huge wet leaf on top of his head.

"Mesa no know that water so little here," he mumbled embarrassed and trudged into deeper water before diving again. R2 gave a sound suspiciously like chuckling and withdrew from the lake. Water did not go well with his motivators.

"So much for a silent and discrete approach," Obi-Wan sighed exasperatedly. "The Trade Federation must have heard this fuss all the way back to Neimoidia."

It took a long time before the gungan reappeared and when he did it was not the way they would have anticipated. Which, in a way, was what to be expected… The gungan's head was the first to break the water surface and a relieved sigh spread through the group. But shortly after another head followed and huge tentacles began to embrace the unlucky gungan.

"Help!" he yelled, "mesa bein' eaten!"

Obi-Wan looked at his Master: "Shall I…?"

But before anyone could answer, the little R2 droid came sweeping through the air and positioned himself above the unknown creature. A thin wire shot out and caught one of the whirling tentacles of the beast in a snare. Then he began to lift. And the octopus-like creature came up, caught like a fish on a hook, with Jar-Jar dangling in two of it's arms, kicking and waving with arms, legs and ears alike. In the next moment a wielding laser beam shot out from R2 and hit the creatures arm, right above Jar-Jar's head.

"Mesa not like being shot at," the gungan howled, "mesa no longarmed creature from water."

The sound coming from R2 might have been a sarcastic snort.

Two more shots right above an increasingly more frantic Jar-Jar and the creature lost it's grip and Jar-Jar was dumped unceremoniously into the lake while R2 flew the unknown creature towards the middle of the lake before letting go.

R2 touched ground just as Jar-Jar came stomping up from the lake, and was immediately surrounded by admiring humans.

Jar-Jar heaved a deep sigh: "Mesa still no like'a maccanics, and besides - Gungan City was empty."

 

Grumbling Jar-Jar and quick-acting R2!

 

I love this "rivalry" and these missing moments from TPM! The physical comedy you described here was hysterical!