That lame TV news anchor banter

Why do they do that? Do they think it's funny? It's not! You're not comedians. Don't make those lame jokes!

 

But then you can make fun of them when you see them at the grocery store.

 

That's true.

 

They have to fill time in the newscast so that you don't notice that all they're doing is telling you about the latest celebrity scandal and low-level crimes instead of the big issues of the day.

 

I love scotch. Scotchy scotch scotch. There it goes, down in my belly.

 

I think all anchor banter should be like Anchorman. I'd actually watch it then.

(I prefer the paper.)

 

They may not be a comedian, but you're not in the wilderness either.

Mr. Kettle, please meet Mr. Pot.

 

Anchorman: Well, since half the city's on fire tonight, Kelli, is it hot enough for ya? Ha-ha!

Kelli: Oh, I don't know, Jim, I guess it could get a lot hotter than that! Ha-ha!

Sports Guy: Ha-ha! Not as hot as my wife's chili last night!

Anchorman: Well, I guess you're lucky you didn't catch on fire, then! Ha-ha-ha!

Screaming Maniac With An Axe: SHUT UP!! SHUT UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP!!!!! YOU STUPID, STUPID PEOPLE--JUST SHUT THE **** UP!!!! ::starts killing everyone::

THE END

OF THE FANTASY I HAVE

WHENEVER I WATCH TV NEWS

 

One of the guys on a local channel here makes a lot of sex innuendos, then the anchorwoman always gets the giggles and can't read the headlines and the weatherman keeps referencing it for the next hour.

 

Around here some guy always does really bad puns, and then the others gang up on him.

 

[image=http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v373/jeblataug/other_stuff/lolctz/ron2.jpg]

 

You haven't seen lame t.v. anchor banter until you've seen Good Day L.A.. Nothing like watching two airheads and one semi-reasonable old guy trying to slug through a mix of gossip and actual news.

And the sad thing is that it's mostly genuine, not scripted.

 

enough to make me ctrl+x myself

Those news anchors really have to cut it out. Seriously.

 

Yeah. My local news has a anchor and a weatherman that make cuts at each other (most) every night. "So, Dave? Do you remember the old song [insert song here]? Well, you should, you're plenty old enough too".


It's corny, but funny in a cheesy way at the same time.

 

It'd be awesome if all local TV anchors loathed each other and showed it on the air, like Tom Tucker and Diane Simmons on Family Guy.

 

My news people are... fine? Except when they air stories that have nothing to do with our local area or anything significant (IE celebrity ****).

 

banter we can all love

I understand she likes to go topless on beaches...

 

She can report on me any time.

 

Ah, that French anchorwoman? She could surrender to me anytime!

 

That's one of the many reasons local television news is worthless.

 

Best. Anchors. Ever.

 

That list of reasons is way too long.

 

I just wanted to let the world know that the last line ("we go live to Diane being a *****") was the first time I actually laughed about something that happened in Family Guy

 

The show is officially worth it, then.

But seriously... not even this?