The 100% Fake Harry Potter Spoilers Thread

Why did Rowling kill off the autistic child staring into the snowglobe at the end of the Deathly Hallows? Doesn't that kind of completely destroy her entire fantasy world? And why was his last words "Rosebud, I am your father?"

(PS - if you post an actual spoiler in here, Dorky or roo will spank you in the NOT cool way...)

 

I have a very bad feeling about this...

 

what we have here is a failure to communicate...

 

What do you mean Hermione becomes real and crucios dp4m to be her love slave?

 

harry dies

harry: no i don't!

oh my bad....


harry: hermonie makes dp4m her slave? wth?

 

Neville??

 

Harry Potter doesn't die!
It's Hermione. Voldemort kills her because she's a bitch
I am not entirely sure what that means.

 

mandark is voldemort

 

I love you!

 

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows as written by Whitey's sister:

"Hagrid marries a dragon. Then he kisses it and it turns into a princess, kinda like Shrek. Harry ultimately dies because he should have died in the first book, which should've been called, "Harry Can't Do Anything and Dies Right Away." But, before he dies, we find he knocked Ginny up, but was really dating the blond haired boy, since he's a gay on the DL. We find that Dumbledore has been evil and has just been leading Voldemort to Harry. He's also the head Death Eater. Ron of course loses a couple of legs cuz he's stupid, and he marries Hermione, and we find out that Hermione isn't really smart. She just has a chip in her head like a computer telling her everything! So, Hogwarts doesn't exist anymore. Voldemort makes it into his place for his Death Eaters. It's pink and white. He's also a gay on the DL, and he only hated Harry because he could never be with him. Martha Stewart is the one who makes over Hogwarts, and she's a witch, we find out, since no one can do that much découpage without witchcraft. Oh yeah, and the teacher that can turn into a cat... turns into a lion!"

 

Dumbledore kills Snape

 

Harry racks his grapes on his broomstick and then has it all choped off to become a woman who then has a romantic night with Lord Voldemort.

 

voldemort is harry

 

Best...
Curse...
EVAR!!!!!11!!1!one!!1!

 

did he mention this version of Hermonie was the one out of the book who isn't as pretty or hott?

 

WTH?

Dumbledore *is* Snape?!

JK's retcon FTL!

 

LIES!!!

and/or

HAX!!!!

 

Nonsense. dp4m and the hot Hermione's love child is the final horcrux.

 

but you didn't say what version it was.

hermonie in the books isn't pretty or hott. the total opposite of emma watson.

thus it would be more fitting if she made dp4m her slave.

 

Then, he gets plastic surgery to look like Hermione, goes back in time, kills the real Hermione, takes her place, and hits on himself!

 

then goes even further in the past and becomes voldemort.

 

I found it really interesting that Lindsay Lohan ACTUALLY became Hermione in the book...

 

what? lindsay? noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo


she was hermonie for a skit in snl

 

IT'S A COOKBOOK!!!!!

Warrior_of_Mandalore Strikes Again!

 

the wicked witch came by and snatched the broom from harry and yelled: "I've been looking for my brrom, and here it is!" Then she turns him into a toad.