What's with the 'Otter Love'?

Sorry if this is an old joke, but what's up with the Corran Horn 'otter love' bit on the page banner? I'm both curious and confused.

 

You don't want to know. You really don't.

Someone's going to tell you, probably within seconds of this post, but you will regret it forever.

 

Some things are best left to the imagination...well sometimes it's better not to imagine anything at all.

 

It's a forbidden love...between man and otter.

 

I had forgotten about that certain little plot point until just now....

 

In Wedge's Gamble, Iella Wessiri relates a story, in the presence of Corran, Gavin Darklighter, and of all people Corran's future wife Mirax, who should rightfully be scared far, far away by this, about one of Corran's relationships.

This relationship is worthy of mention to Gavin because Gavin is himself interested in having sex with Asyr Sei'lar, a Bothan. So basically a dog. Except he thinks she's a fox (rimshot!). He asks Corran about being with someone of a different species. Iella overhears and trots out the story of this relationship. Hilarity has ensued ever since.

See, this is the story of how Corran Horn had sex with a nearly seven-foot-tall otter.

Chertyl Ruluwoor, a Selonian -- an otterlike species native to Selonia, in the same system as Corellia -- was attached to Corellian Security as some kind of liaison person. She was there during the time of the annual ball. Now, no one wanted to ask her to go to the ball with them, because she was a gigantic anthropomorphic otter somewhere over 6'7" in height. This is understandable. So, instead, they had a raffle to see who got stuck going with her, inverting the usual charity raffle of an eligible member of the Force.

Corran, being a gentleman, devised a plan to get paid to take everyone else's ticket. Not satisfied with money, he gave it all away to charity and splurged on a limo and flowers and crap just to show her a good time. Corran Horn was, at the time, depressed. This may excuse his conduct.

So, Corran Horn wound up going to the ball with a six-and-a-half-foot otter. However, because this is fiction, she suddenly looked amazing when she showed up at the ball in a slinky dress. Everyone was jealous of the giant otter and her lucky date, who stood at least thirteen inches shorter than her if not more.

Corran succumbed to this mass furry dementia, and decided that that otter looked pretty damn good to him too. So he took her back home and they had sex. Iella makes no mention of it, but experts agree there was probably an assload of alcohol involved.

When Corran was done having sex with an NBA-height riverine mammal known for its cuteness while frolicking in the water, but not that kind of cuteness, both he and his date discovered they were in great discomfort. Not because she had worms, but because his sweat had irritated her skin, and he was allergic to the hair which completely covered her entire body.

Both having full-body rashes, they decided this probably wasn't going to work, and bid each other a fond adieu. The moral of this story, as related to Gavin by Iella and Corran, is that you're allowed to have sex with pretty much anything, no matter how weird it is or how little sense it makes that you would be both attracted to it and not sexually deviant, but it may have unforeseen consequences, such as medical conditions, or people wondering if you're into bestiality or something. But go for it anyway, because you're not open-minded until you've had sex with someone more hirsute than you.

 

You just had to do it. Didn't you?

 

If this doesn't beg to be WHTTATWJSed, nothing does.

 

I'm not sure I want to know what that acronym means....

 

I forgot about that... untill now. God Dangit!

 

This is the best worst thing...ever.

 

I felt like a bad person just reading it.

 

Havac, you really have a knack for coming up with hilarious and accurate summaries.

 

Just know, you will never be able to un-read that.

 

To paraphrase that great philosopher of our times, Derek Klivian: There are three types of horrifying story. The kind that scars the teller, the kind that scars the readers, and the kind that scars everybody. I'm going for the third type. Fair is fair.

 

Hmmm. I always pictured Bothans as more of a goat-looking species than dogs or foxes, but a dog pretty much sums it up. I was always incredibly disturbed with Gavin's relationship to Asyr on some level... And lol, the banner image is awesome.

 

At least with Bothans there's a chance Stackpole had in mind, say, one of the elf-looking Bothans or even one of the more attractive examples of ape-Bothans. (We haven't seen any, but we could assume they exist.) By contrast, Selonians have never been shown to be anything other than cat/otter types.

The real question is why we have a Valentine's Day banner in December. Do we really need a reminder of that holiday this early? I'm voting for a SAD banner when February actually does roll 'round...

TC

 

Nice

 

Counterpoint: Requiem for a Rogue, where Wes and Hobbie get it on with two very dog-like Bothans.

 

yay it's weirdo week again and just without Glove of Darth Vader!

Good summary Havac! You should do more of those that are not Jacen-centered. Like OT-Era Luke/Leia frolicking! I currently reread classic comics and Marvel and stopped counting kisses when I reached over 30 passionate kisses, embraces and other dubious pictures.

But to return to topic: Alien Love? furry, oversized, nonhumanoids that get it on with humans?

Sounds like Raynar Thul dating Centaur Horsegirl to me!

 

Hey whatever floats your boat. Come on who here wouldn't at least think about just possibly hitting something like this......
[image=http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/thumb/c/cb/Selonian_AA.jpg/250px-Selonian_AA.jpg]

or

[image=http://chan.yiffy.tk/file/31480/1226533303492222687.jpg]

Of course I admit I have my kinks.

 

I knew something happened with Corran and something furry, but my mind has officially been blown.

And thanks for the summary Havac! As sordid as it is...

 

Hot sweaty otter love.

Look no further than the Star Wars Expanded Universe.

I love this forum.

 

Well, at least it's not infant love.

We can still hold our heads high... there are franchises out there more achingly stupid than ours.

Otter Power.

 

Seems there are a lot of people here prejudiced against inter race relationships on here, a discraceful display of alien bigotry.