JCC Embrace The FU - Formerly the STAR WARS IS BAD thread

I've seen this argument being used by Rey fanboys and it never works. Kylo didn't exhibit any signs of injury in his duels. The only time he exhibited pain is when he purposefully punched his wound. He was wailing his lightsaber just fine throughout the entire duel, and he managed to catch up to Rey and Finn in deep snow. Wow, so injured. And I said she overpowered him in the mind control scene even way before their duel. She overpowered a Skywalker who has been trained since he was a kid by both Luke and Snoke, had battlefield experience both against force users (Luke's academy) and on the ground against normal soldiers. He participated on the ground in every First Order invasion. Rey had just touched a lightsaber for the first time. Ever since ANH it's always been said that lightsabers are vastly different weapons and require an extreme amount of practice to wield proficiently, like Rey did.

I know some of you want to see the strong independent woman and whatever, and that's fine with me. But you can't defend a **** character just because she appears to have these qualities when in reality she does not. Leia was a good character and something what you people are looking for - a female that can do her own ****. Nobody calls her a Mary Sue (well, if we exclude that Superman thing she did)

 

after he killed his own father which tore him up emotionally so he was unstable which was reconfirmed in this movie and he was wounded by a bowcaster the strength of which was pointed out in that movie.

 

i weirdly don't remember this being said once.

 

Oh no, he’s got you, too.

 

The whole thing with Kylo is that he's not fully trained & thinks he's better than he is. He hates that, because Snoke thinks he's weak. Hence asking his Grandfather to show him instead.

What would be an interesting development in IX is if it turns out Rey is the chosen one, selected by the Force to be its champion & general OP badass as Anakin was meant to be before he had an argument with lava.

Imagine how Kylo would feel.
He, the descendant of the greatest Force user the Galaxy has ever known, overlooked by destiny in favour of some nobody who is granted greater power.
He'd lose his ****, and may become a greater villain because of it

 

I already feel that the Force has chosen Rey and thus why she is NOT a Mary sue.

 

It's amazing, look what happened to us.

 

We've discussed that. People also seem to forget that she overpowered him with the Force even before that (twice, actually), but whatever.

Doesn't matter when we're comparing him with Rey though. Kylo is should be vastly more experienced than Rey both in the Force and in combat skills, but whe never see any of that. Snoke may think whatever, in the end Snoke is even weaker than Kylo because he couldn't even foresee his obvious betrayal he quite cheerfully narrated.

Kylo is no threat anymore. He has been embarrassed too many times to be of any interest as a main villain. Hux, unfortunately, is even worse. Snoke=Plagueis theory may have been a good way to explain things and make a competent villain, but unfortunately they ruined that too. Even if Snoke returns, which I doubt considering how he was killed, he won't be able to recover as a villain from the way he was killed.

 

i dunno, i kinda like that this thread attracts people with the absolute worst takes and thereby reunites the rest of us.

 

I mean, Luke Skywalker, but it's cool. Anakin too. Oh, but prophecy, you splutter in response?

OK so they also only explain Rey's innate ability as "darkness rises, and light to meet it" as well as the Force literally seeking to create balance by explaining that as Kylo grew in the dark side, his counterpart in the light would also rise, but she's a SJW avatar and gross girl.

 

Oh yes, Luke Skywalker, the guy who got his ass beat like 10 times in each movie and finally managed to defeat Vader right at the end by using the Dark Side to fuel himself. Or Anakin, the "Chosen One", who got owned by pretty much everyone and his only real victory was against Dooku in a 2v1. You know, the same guy who cut off his arms in the previous movie. Yeah, they're more Mary Sue than Rey who overcame every challenge in the first 5 min of her seeing it.

Rey is already stronger than Kylo. What is this balance you're talking about?

 

Hmm... looks like Spectre understands our creed: everything is bad.
We've just been slacking

 

This was in the trailer, it's not a Mary Sue moment:

 

I don't see how Rey using the Force to surprise and briefly overpower an injured Kylo Ren is that different from Luke just using the Force to fire proton torpedoes down a tiny shaft with no targeting computer.
Luke had basically zero training at that point, but he did it.

Aside from her flying skills, there's not much else wrong with Rey's abilities in TFA.

 

Well, for my 12th screening I went in with my stopwatch, my sleep mask, and noise cancelling earphones, so that I could ignore all of the film that I marked on my time sheet as being insufficiently good. If you recall, my plan was to block out all the parts of the film that didn't work for me leaving only the good parts that I liked, so whenever there was a bad part I pulled down my sleep mask and turned on my noise cancelling earphones and listened to the sound of ocean waves. I confess. This was a dismal failure.

Only 83 minutes of the film's 150 minute run time was marked as watchable, and what was left was a incoherent mess. There was no sense of plot. Characters acted with apparently no motivation, and one time when I left my state of sensory deprivation, I thought I was witnessing the beginning of the Battle of Hoth. Totally jarring. On the plus side, at the times the film was blocked out, I found sound of ocean waves very calming, and that helped me to deal with my cognitive dissonance from having mixed feelings about TLJ.

So, at this point, you're probably thinking, there's nothing else good old Nerdling can do. However, it was at this point that I remembered something about myself.

Let me digress for a moment to tell you about split brain patients. The two hemispheres of the brain are connected by a neural network known as the corpus callusom. For various extreme medical reasons, some people have to undergo surgery that severs the corpus callusom, which in turn prevents the two hemispheres from communicating with each other. These are known as split brain patients. Amazingly, split brain patients have no apparent cognitive impairments or even obvious side effects from this procedure. Now, for a revelation about myself. Personally, I did not undergo surgery. Rather, I was born without a corpus callusom, and for this reason, the two hemispheres of my brain have never been connected.

Okay, now, on to the reason I bring this up. People with split brains react differently to stimuli when that stimuli is only exposed to one side of the body. (I was reminded of this fact when I experimented with sensory deprivation during my 12th screening.) You probably know that the information received from the right eye, right ear, and right side of the body is transmitted to the left hemisphere of the brain, and vice versa. At the same time, the two hemisphere's have radically different functions. The left side of the brain understands language, logic, and reasoning. It's the analytical side. On the other hand, the right side of the brain is more emotional. It controls imagination, creativity, and our intuitions.

Since the two sides of my brain aren't connected, if I can only see and hear something with my left eye and left ear, then only the right side of brain is stimulated, the side of the brain that is imaginative and creative. Also, if I can only see and hear something with my right eye and right ear, then the left side of my brain responds, and that's my analytical side.

Well, that's what I experimented with during my 13th and 14th screenings. For my 13th screening, I used earphones and my sleep goggles to block out all information to my right eye and right ear. Then, for my 14th screening, I instead blocked out all sensory input from my left eye and left ear. Well, it turns out that I had profoundly different experiences!

It turns out that my rational analytical left brain doesn't like TLJ much it all. It's annoyed by the inconsistencies of the film -- Rey's story seems to take weeks or months, while the other story lines seem to take about a day or two; Luke behaves in ways highly inconsistent to his character; both Holdo and Poe act stupidly; the theme is shallow; the repetition of elements from TESB too obvious.

Conversely, the emotional creative right side of my brain just loves TLJ: the music, the visuals, the action, the great performances from Hamill and Ridley, magic Leia, the hyperspace explosion, the cute horse animals running amok in Canto Bight, porgs (!), the crystalline interior of the Hoth-like planet. The right side of my brain was simply blown away by TLJ.

So, by performing this experiment, I've finally solved it! All I need to do is block sensory input to my right eye and ear, and I love the film. Of course, since language comprehension occurs in the left side of my brain, I can't understand a word that's said in the film, but dialogue has never been a strong suit of Star Wars anyway.

Plus, I can watch it the opposite way, exposing the film to my analytical side, and I'll be able to nitpick the **** out it, like any good Star Wars fan does. It's really the best of both worlds!

 

get help.

 

"Rey is moar powahful than Luke! She beat Kylo Ren!"



Many booms, much like.



The entire basis of that insipid argument.

"Luke got his ass beat"

I saw no donkeys in the film. But sure.





Your argument is brilliant.

 

Thanks for your concern. I am looking into a experimental treatment that uses stem cells to regrow my corpus callusom, but that won't be for years. However, as I said, I'm perfectly happy living with my split brain condition.

 

I actually found that really interesting and informative.

But those qualities make it off-topic.

 

Let me bring it back on topic;

No one cur.

 

Just to deal with at least a mostly-rational question: it's most likely his MOS ("Military Occupation Specialty"). Sanitation is probably part of the overall, since (as we know) Snoke has been steadily marching on the galaxy with his forces and conquering key places (this is stepped up in the opening crawl of TLJ). You need combat-ready troops who can participate and then identify key water, waste, and other sanitation systems in conquered locations to get them set up, either for the military or to get them back online for the population (depending on the goals).

So, in between, he's almost certainly dealing with janitorial management on the Star Destroyers (since, it keeps up his training along with his combat training) and knows offhand what systems exist to support those or are supported by them (i.e. laundry facilities, trash compactors, etc.) -- but it doesn't mean he's any less of a grunt for the other times.

 

Um, well, the ocean sound recording I was listening to was accompanied with the sound of calming heart beats that occurred every second. All I had to do was look down at my sheet which told me how many seconds I should block out the movie and then I counted the number of heart beats to know when I should take off my sleep mask and noise blocking headphones.

 

I just thought Finn got promoted and this was his first combat mission.