Amazing Discoveries!

I'm sure everyone here has seen Amazing Discoveries! And if you haven't, you don't know what you're missing. It's easily the pinnacle of all informercials.

[image=http://www.fadetoblack.com/tvguide/amazing.jpg]

Just look how happy what's-his-face is! I wonder what he's doing now.

Anyway, back to the show. Remember the part when the guest with the new product would list everything you get and name the price.

Guest: "All that, for just $49.95!!!"
Host Guy [to crowd]: "What do you think?"
Crowd: "MORE!!!"
Guest: "All right, I'll throw in half a dozen spatulas and this new rinse cream!"
Crowd: "MORE!!!"
Guest: "What if I also include a cookbook full of my favorite recipes, plus an extra surprise recipe?"
Crowd: "Hooray!" (applause)

Now, what I want to know is, what happens if the crowd keeps asking for more? Does that guy have an unlimited amount of free stuff to give away? Or if he runs out, do they riot and steal everything? If I was in the crowd, I'd hold out for as much crap as possible, then flip out if he ran out of stuff. How dare he try and cheat us?! No good cheating bastard! Let's get him!

That jerk has me all riled up now! Someone calm me down and explain!

Amazing.

 

I want to know one thing: Is that you in the picture?

 

There's only one word for this:


Amazing.

 

You have every reason to be riled up. You can't have enough crap these days. My house looks like a Dollar General and I still want more!! Let's get him!!!

*throws Michael Jackson bobble head*

 

I doubt that they have big "More!" and "Applause" signs that they use to let the audience know what to do. That would be cheating.

 

Yes and Late Night with Conan O'Brien is filmed live at 12:30 at night.

 

Amazing! [face_shocked]

 

The host of that show was fantastic. He would excited about the most commonplace of events.

"Wow, look at that folks, this space age 'liquid soap' got the grime off my hands after just 5 minutes of scrubbing!"

 

I doubt that they have big "More!" and "Applause" signs that they use to let the audience know what to do. That would be cheating.

Yeah that would be impossible, no one cheats

 

I like the disclaimers at the bottom of the screen. Like the one with the Goo Gone.

"Elapsed time: 48 months"

It can remove anything!!!

 

Bob: Don't worry about that, Nancy. Come along with me! Look at what we've got here. I've got a Superpan that has been heating up on the stove for over *nine* hours.

Jill: Wow.

Bob: I'd say that's pretty hot!

Jill: Yeah.

Bob: But do me a favor, put your hand in it.

Jill: [slight pause] It's hot, though.

Bob: How do you know if it's hot, if you haven't touched it?

Jill: [giggles] Seems like it would be. [giggles again.]

Bob: Do you want to see her touch the pan? [crowd "yeahs!"] Yes, you do! C'mon, do it! [Jill is *very* hesitant] C'mon, Nancy. C'mon girl. C'mon.

[She slowly start to bring her hand to it, when Bob grabs her hand and forces it to the pan. She screams. Bob wipes her hand with his.]

Bob: Oh, Nancy! The Superpan is not magical, it will burn you.

[Jill still sobbing and mumbling.]

Bob: You shouldn't listen to crowds and you shouldn't listen to pans.

 

There was an episode of the Jamie Kennedy Experiment once (I don't watch it, I just heard about it from a friend) where he was hosting a fake infomercial for a rotisserie chicken oven. During his demonstration, the oven exploded. But for $20, people from the audience would come onstage and say what a great product it was.

 

"I know you all came here expecting to pay $800. Maybe even $900 or $1000! And it would be well-worth it! The quality of this product and it's benfits to you are unsurpassed. But, you know that I'm not going to make you pay $1000. [Insert fancing price slashing graphic] Or $900. Or even $800! Folks, for this fabulous piece of equipment, I'm not even going to make you pay $700, or $600! Not $550, not $500, not $450! That's right, friends, this unbelievable product comes with an equally unbelievable price of just 36 EASY payments of $69.95!" [Audience goes crazy.]

Voice over: "No, Ron! The Super Grade Mega Choppofryermatic can no be your's for just 32 EASY payments of $66.95!"

 

In Run Ronnie Run, there was a fake infomercial for a machine called something like "the foodinator". It's that typical annoying British guy... "What's the number one problem in the kitchen today? [you know, he's gettin all excited and what not] That's right, it's food! But the foodinator absolutely destroys food. You just put the food inside the foodinator [he demonstrates], turn it on..."

At this point the device explodes, and a blade goes flying directly into his assistant Nancy's throat, killing her instantly. Later, he's in the editing booth trying to get the editor guy to take just that part out, and they show it over and over and over again. And even when the camera is showing their faces, you still hear the sound she makes looping in the background. It's amazing.

 

LOL - I love that photo...FadeToBlack is cool.

 

I wouldn't wait til they started shouting more. I'd charge the stage as soon as it started, take the loot, and run. Let the people get ripped off, I do it my way