ARGH! Girls SUCK!

Just sleep with her a couple of times and then dump her.

 

I don't think I want to do that...

 

Val, it sounds like this woman just jumps from man to man, and YOU'RE her next "victim" if you will. You said she just broke up with your friend, she's putting the moves on you now, and she is only 25 with one divorce under her belt and TWO broken engagements? Whew!!! She needs a breather, methinks. I think you're right to keep it at just a friendship level and nothing more.

But, you do need to tell her you just want to stay friends before she actually succeeds with kissing you.

 

Well, I wouldn't feel comfortable with talking about it with her...

I mean, for all I really know, we are just hanging out as friends. We aren't dating or anything. So maybe all of the little hints and stuff are just her way of jokingly flirting (which is what me and her used to do back before we ever started hanging out).

 

Sorry to hijack, Val. Hope you can sort that out, though I've never had a girl pay me any of that kind of attention so I can't really help.

But I do have a question of my own. I considered posting a thread about it saying "So there's this hot girl at the bus station", but malkie hates those parody threads.

Anyway, there's a hot girl at the bus station. Seriously though, I got there just as my bus was pulling away, as you do, and turned around in a not too good but not too bad mood to find an old friend from high school standing behind me, waiting on her bus.

Back in high school I had what I guess most people would call 'a big thing' or a 'huge crush' or whatever with this girl, and while she would never reciprocate she still spoke to me and treated me well. This is a huge contrast to any other girl I ever expressed an interest in (and some who I didn't but was accused of liking). Yeah, it really says something when people use "that guy has a crush on you" as an insult.

Anyway, since leaving high school I've seen her a few times now, including again today at the bus station. Her bus arrived a couple of minutes later and she asked if I was able to get on it. So, in true Bill Murray fashion, I said "sure" without even knowing where the heck the bus was going.

We talked the whole way to her stop. There were a couple of quiet moments but no screeching, grinding uncomfortable silences. She didn't even seem perturbed about my medical stories, and actually shared some relatively similar stuff about people she knew. It was lovely.

So my query is thus: Can a girl ever change her mind (for the good)? If a person was not interested at all in the past, is it likely this could change?

 

Yeah. You hear about it all the time.

"Oh, I never thought of going out with him/her before. But now..."

I know girls that have changed their minds about guys. It does happen.

Heck, Ross and Rachel from Friends are sort of an example of such...

 

Beautiful, popular high school queen leaves and discovers that nerdy Star Wars nut who was always trying to go out with her is actually worth giving a shot?

Yippie!

I have a new found appreciation for that show now.

 

One of my friends, a beautiful and relatively smart Puerto Rican girl, told me that she was initially disgusted by the thought of going out with the guy who is now her boyfriend.

It's strange, too. You see her and you see him, and you would never guess that they're going out. He's fat and unattractive and she's, well, dazzling. They've been going out for like 2 years now.

 

Thanks, Valyn. Hope springs eternal.

Now if I can just convince her to come with me to King Arthur tomorrow.

 

I don't suck!

I'm really rather nice.

 

That remains to be seen.

Yeah, sleep with her a few times and dump her, dude. Admit the Sith Lord in your heart.

 

I don't suck!

if you're single, this might explain why.

 

Honestly, the entire 'Star Wars geeks are incompetent with women, and all-round geeky and socially immature' is overrated. The biggest barrier there is stereotypes - you see a lot of movies that present the geek as being completely obsessed with series or universe X, and usually has an uninteresting life to someone other than a Star Wars fan. She could easily see a different person now that she doesn't have all her friends pointing and yelling "geek!" Well, that's probably a bit of an exaggeration, but you get the idea.

Edit: This is all in response to anakin_skywalker_sct's post.

 

I don't think I've ever had a problem with being a "geek."

And this girl likes my geekiness.

Well, today she's celebrating her birthday with her friends. She asked me to come but I figured I'd be bogged down with studying...and I didn't want to spend anymore cash since I barely have any. And I didn't want her to pay for me again.

But, as it turns out, and much to my dismay, I...miss her. Damn. I really like hanging out with her.

 

While we're talking aobut girl problems, here's my situation-

Tommorow I'm supposed to go over this girl's house who I know from my history class. I was the class clown in that class and was always making her laugh. So at the end of the year I decided to ask her out for Friday night and she said she couldn't then becasue she had to go to her best friend's Sweet 16 birthday party. And she said that for the couple of days after that she was going to be busy hanging out with her brother who was going away to college soon. So she said how about the week after, but I couldn't then because that was the week I left for a 2 week vacation. In the end we decided I'd call her when I got back and we'd get together then.

So when I got back, I gave her a call and asked her to the movies on saturday, but she said she couldn't get a ride. So she suggested I come over to her house. The next day she called to tell me that she was going to be busy on Saturday because her friend was going to New York the next day and wanted to hang out with her. So we said I'd give her a call sometime next week. So I called her a few hours ago and told her I'd come over tommorow around 4 or 5.

I'm not sure if she just wants to hang out as friends, or if she considers this a date. Also, I don't know what the heck we're gonna do over her house. I'm worried that we'll have nothing to do and the whole thing will be a disaster. Neither of us is old enough to drive yet, and every place is a long walk away and I don't know if her parents will be able to give us a ride.

Any thoughts on this situation would be really appreciated.

 

Be friendly, but flirt. Always flirt. But do it in a way that's flattering...but not sappy. Keep it playful.

And either take a bus or hire a cab if you've got the cash. Or, heck, ride bikes even.

 

Honestly, the entire 'Star Wars geeks are incompetent with women, and all-round geeky and socially immature' is overrated.

The word you're searching for is not "overrated" which makes no grammatical sense whatsoever. The word, or more accurately, the phrase you're searching for to follow the word "immature", is "stereotype is empirically, irrevocably and demonstrably true."

 

this thread is still here? damn, it was started a year ago...

 

Hmm...indeed it was.

 

Note that the above axiom only applies to males.

 

The word you're searching for is not "overrated" which makes no grammatical sense whatsoever. The word, or more accurately, the phrase you're searching for to follow the word "immature", is "stereotype is empirically, irrevocably and demonstrably true."

No. It's not.

 

Yes. It is. Stop being naive and accept the truth that male Star Wars geeks are losers.

 

WMCoolmon has a valid, if slightly stilted, point.

Sorry man, I am on your side, you just managed to pick one wrong word, but I do that all the time. I know what you were trying to say.

It's certainly true, even in high school when I was alone with her she would talk to me for as long as we wanted. She even accepted my offers of excursions. Then she went off with her friends, and they always managed to talk her out of it. Once we had the whole thing ready for dinner and a show on Saturday, and on the Friday afternoon at the start of our very last class she comes up and informs me shyly she's NOW decided to go out with someone else. Y'know, someone big and burly and masculine that all her friends had been goggling over all year.

That one hurt.

But yes, without peers she seems perfectly comfortable with me. And she isn't the only one, I usually get on fine with girls I've ended up in a one-to-one situation with, for whatever reason that happens. Like the girl I went to the doctors with. That was fun.

 

Star Wars does not serve as a barrier between guys and girls.

I know a very cool guy who you would never think to be interested in something like SW. But he IS into SW. And he's very popular within every circle.

The problem most geeks have is that they allow themselves to blame their failures on their interests. There is no reason why these geeks can't also start pumping iron and dressing in accordance with the latest fashion.

People who first look at me would never think I'm a geek.

That whole typical skinny and pale geek appearance is probably what really serves to strengthen the assumption that geeks are unattractive.

Just make yourself a more rounded person. Take up other interests in addition to Star Wars.

 

I'm 6'2", 270 lbs. of muscle. I'm hardly vulnerable by any standard. I'm probably more of a goth than a geek, at least in terms of attitude. My interests are geeky, and I do mix well with almost everyone.

BUT, I never seem to get the girls, even though I'm pretty well-liked most of the time. Most of them just consider me their friend, or "the sweet guy." It's not that everyone hates me. It's as I said above -- I'm not too good with women. Thus, I fit the stereotype.