Beyond - Legends Here Today, Where Tomorrow? -OC, eventually Ben and others- (Dear Diary '09) ~Entry 9: 5/31/09~

I didn't do much to help this time since I didn't really know what was going on, but I still loved being there and I hope I'll get to do more next time.

I thought about talking to Master Solusar about my dream but I decided not to. It's not that I don't think he'll help me, I just don't want him to think I'm like the little ones and really needed. Maybe I will later on... if it happens again.

Great update!

 

Jade_eyes:Interesting... I bet Randa never thought she'd miss her old home, but now she's able to remember the good points about it while still enjoying everything she's experiencing in the moment
I've found that no matter how miserable something was in life, there was probably something positive about it (or at least something you learned) and something you would miss once you've had time to get over the really bad things. I wanted to show that and I'm glad you saw it!

Loved how well she's doing with the younglings happy They took to her right off which says a lot about her sweetness level LOL
Oh yeah, she is just about as sweet as she can be... kids really love her and she really loves them.

On a total tangent, congrats on the new job and finishing orientation. I just transitioned into the totally live part of my medical transcribing and I love it... cool !!!!!!! Huggles!!!!
Thanks! That is awesome that you love your job, there is nothing worse than hating it! I'd say I almost love my job... it's not my first love I'd rather be in performing arts but that's never going to happen so I'm mostly content working in a hospital!


Nat:Glad she's enjoying her time on Ossus, even thuogh she misses her old home. And i think she should ask Kam too, though I think her roommates are right and teh answer will upset her
Yeah, she misses her old home but she also wouldn't go back for anything. We'll see if she asks Kam...

Great entry!! I loved the little kids piling on her
Thanks! I love it when little ones do that... I don't think there is anything more cute than that!


Vadey:Great update!
Thanks so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it!

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[u]Entry Seven[/u]

[b]Subject:[/b] It's been a long time
[b]Location:[/b] My room

Wow! It's been a long time since I've written in this thing. I've been here at the academy for almost six standard months now and it really feels like home. I still don't have any really close friends but that's okay, I like hanging out with the little kids and getting to help out with them. I know it sounds bad that I don't have any close friends, but there are people I talk to and eat with... I"m not always on my own in the corner, though I do like that sometimes too. Most everyone is really nice to me I just don't want to tell them everything about me. Is that wrong? I know they all think I'm really weird but I don't mind that either.

Today I finally told Master Solusar about my dream I wrote about a while back. I've had simular dreams a few other times but they didn't seem as real as the first one. They really were like dreams and that one was really real. When I told him he got a strange look on his face, said "Hmmm...." and then didn't say anything else. I don't know if he'll tell me anything but I hope he will, I want to know what made him look that way.

I've learned so much in my classes and meditation is still my favorite. I just found out that I'm going to get to take a higher meditation class than most everyone else in my class once this one is over and I'm so excited! I'll be in there with older kids but that's ok, I usually like to talk to older beings anyway.

I think I might now know who Master Skywalker's son is... others keep trying to point him out but I usually miss him. I think I saw him sitting in the corner in the archives by himself, at least it was a boy who looked like what others say he looks like. I thought about going and talking to him but I figured if someone like him was alone he probably wanted to be that way. I bet he is really popular and everyone wants to be his friend.




[b]Status:[/b] Randa is doing nothing.
[b]Mood:[/b] Excited!!

[u][i]5 Comments:[/u][/i]

[b]Corellia_Girl[/b] wrote:
I'm glad to hear from you, I was getting a little worried. That is great you get to go to a higher level class; it shows you have a lot of talent in that area. I find it interesting that Master Solusar thought your dream was interesting. I think there is more to it than a drea

 

Super udpate.

How cool is that!! Randa's gonna be in a class with older kids which means she's really mastered the meditation quicker than her age mates.

kam's look... what's up with that?

 

Lovely update!

 

Sorry I'm so late

I think her reader is right - I think Ben was alone because it's hard for him, not because he chose to be. I really hope she meets him soon

 

Jade_eyes: Super udpate. How cool is that!! Randa's gonna be in a class with older kids which means she's really mastered the meditation quicker than her age mates.
Thanks girl! Yep, she a smart one even though she hasn't had much in the way of school before she is a fast learner.

kam's look... what's up with that?
You'll find out very soon!


VaderLVR64: Lovely update!
Thank you so much!

Nat: Sorry I'm so late
No worries!

I think her reader is right - I think Ben was alone because it's hard for him, not because he chose to be. I really hope she meets him soon
I think it would be very hard for Ben... I feel bad for him.
I've gotten quite a few of the viginetts that this character is based on written and I'm having to make sure that time line fits with this one so it's a little hairy as to when they will really meet but it should be sooner rather than later!

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[u]Entry Eight[/u]

[b] Subject:[/b] My dream
[b] Location:[/b] Away from everyone else

At the end of the younglings meditation class today Master Solusar pulled me aside and told me to follow him. At first I thought I was in trouble, I kept thinking about things I might have done that were not allowed, or things I told the younglings that might have been wrong but I couldn't think of anything.

He didn't say much on our way but evidently he could tell I was scared because as we reached a door he told me not to be nervous and that it wasn't something I did but something he thinks someone else should explain to me.

As he opened the door I noticed where we were, I had been here once before when I first got here, we were in Master Skywalker's office. Master Skywalker got up from behind his desk as we walked in and motioned for me to sit on the form couch that was at the side of the room. When I did he sat down beside me.

I didn't like the look on his face, he looked sad, like something bad had happened.

He told me that when Master Solusar had told him about my dream he did some research and found information about Balia. He told me he thought that what I saw wasn't actually a dream but that Balia was a Force sensitive and had managed to come to tell me goodbye.

I didn't know what to do when he told me, I know he was telling me things about how she might have been able to do that but I didn't hear any of it.

I don't know what to do, Balia is... was my only friend and even though I've been away from her I knew she was there.

I feel so lost. So alone.


[b]Status:[/b] Randa is alone.
[b]Mood:[/b] Sad

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[u][i]Comments[/i][/u]

[i]Comments have been disabled for this entry[/i]

 

Oh no poor Randa... that's so sad! Even though she's separated from Balia... and didn't know when or if she'd see her again, now she knows she never can. I hope she can find someone here to be as close to.

 

A sad but lovely entry!

 

J_e: Yeah, I would think it would be really lonely for her. She will find someone eventually... I'm working on the timing of that right now. I've got a vig series (not posted yet, but soon) that's in this verse and I've kinda messed the timeline up with this so I've got to find a way to fix it!
Thanks for reading, girl!

Vadey: Thank you so much!

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[u][i] Entry Nine[/u][/i]


[b]Subject:[/b] Last entry
[b]Location:[/b] The gardens

I'm sorry I turned off the comments on my last entry, I didn't want to read everyone saying they were sorry. I know it sounds... bad, I guess to say that, but I just didn't want to. I think it would have made me feel worse.

It's been several weeks now and it doesn't hurt quite so much. I think someone told the girls in my room about Balia because they were paying more attention to me than they usually do. Not that they ignore me, but we really don't have that much in common, as I've said before.

It was kinda nice to not feel so alone but it also made me feel worse, like that was the only reason they invited me to sit with them at meals.

Things have pretty much gone back to normal now, they say hi and ask what I did today but that is pretty much it. What might be weird is that I'm ok with the way we work. They talk to me more than anyone at the orphanage did and they are actually nice about it, but they don't have to hang out with someone they really don't want to be with.

It works for everyone.

On a more fun note, they are taking some of us off world to see some of the galaxy. I'm not sure where we are going yet but they say it's important for us to understand others and they way they live their lives. I'm really excited about it because I've never really been anywhere.

Oh, my life day is coming up soon too. I don't think they really make anything of that here, I haven't seen it if they do, but that's alright, I really hope they don't. It would be really embarrassing if they did.

I'm kinda embarassed just writing about it.

Don't tell anyone, ok? :-)


[b]Status:[/b] Randa is dreaming about seeing the galaxy.
[b]Mood:[/b] Mostly excited, a little sad.

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[u][i]4 Comments[/u][/i]

[b]Corellia_Girl[/b] wrote:
I'm sorry about your loss, and that's all I'll say. I don't want to stir up bad memories. If you need to talk, you can always message me. That trip sounds like fun, any place you really want to go?
Don't worry, your secret is safe with me!
-C_G

. . . . [b]Randa27[/b] wrote:
. . . . Thank you. I've been looking at a bunch of places and I think I want to go somewhere with a lot of water, like Mon Calamari. That would be really astral!
What secret?? :-p


[b]Funnyboy[/b] wrote:
You get to do all the astral things, I'm starting to think I was born in the wrong family. I'm mean sure you had a bad beginning but look at what you get to do now! I wish I was you. You are so lucky! I hope you have fun so you can tell us all about it.

. . . . [b]Randa27[/b] wrote:
. . . . Um... thank you? I don't think anyone would wish to have my life, but it could always be worst so I'm happy with what I have. I try not to forget that.

. . . . [b]Corella_Girl[/b] wrote:
. . . . How could you say something like that, funnyboy, after all the things she's said. Yes, she's getting to do some pretty great things now, but I don't think it's all fun and games, I'm sure it's a lot of work too.

. . . . . . . [b]Randa27[/b] wrote:
. . . . . . . Thank you, C_G. It is a lot of work but I get to learn new things which is always fun, atleast to me!

 

Great that Randa's starting to adjust. Glad she has the trip to look gorward to. Two interesting things: she doesn't want a fuss about her life day and is embarrassed about it; I think this must reflect the fact that she's not used to being the affectionate center of attention so doesn't miss it or need it much; which is reiterated by the second thing: that she appreciated her roommates being extra nice to her but likes it better when it went back to normal--them being nice but not necessarily needing to be pals. The roommates' reaction to Randa's loss was also realistic--being extra considerate for a while and then just saying hi and making small talk, in contrast to one or more of them wanting to deepen the relationship. This all shows that Randa must be sending the message that she doesn't need gally pals, but I hope she's not keeping people at a distance out of fear or mistrust.

 

Poor Randa I hope she has fun off-world

 

You captured all of those conflicting emotions SO well! Beautiful work!