Top five comedy sketches?

Now standalone sketches only, so no movies with a central narrative or sitcoms, Life of Brian no, Meaning of Life yes, Not the Nine O'Clock News yes, Blackadder no. Probably showing my age and nationality but these are my choices

1. The Class Sketch-John Cleese as the city gent, Ronnie Barker as the blue collar worker and Ronnie Corbett as the tramp (was ever there a better casting?) "I am middle class. I too have captial but I am vulgar"

2. The Four Yorkshiremen-John Cleese (for the second time!), Marty Feldman, Tim Brooke Taylor, Graham Chapman. Four absurdly competitive northerners vying to discover who had the most deprived childhood."We were evicted from our hole in the ground"

3. Going for an English-A sketch you probably find funnier if you're British or Indian. After a night out in Bombay 4 friends end the evening as they always do, going to their favourite English resteraunt and ordering 'The blandest things on the menu!'

4. Constable Savage-Rowan Atkinson's exasperated Superintendent berates Gryff Rhys Jones thuggish police officer for repeatedly arresting the same man 'a Mr Winston Cadogo' for crimes such as 'walking on the cracks in the pavement, loitering with intent to use a pedestrian crossing, wearing a loud shirt in a built up area during the hours of darkness'.

5. One legged man auditioning for Tarzan-Dudley Moore's uniped actor trying to convince Peter Cook's extremely cynical casting agent that he's suitable for the role of Tarzan 'A role traditionally associated with a 2 legged man. Now I like your right leg, it's a lovely leg for the role, I've nothing against your right leg at all. Trouble is neither do you'

What are your choices?

 

A van down by the river

 

Monty Python's Dead Parrot/Pet Shop sketch.

does musical comedy count? If so:

Flight of the Conchords - Business Time

"two minutes in heaven is better than one minute in heaven."

Which brings to mind the classic for the ages. "**** In a Box."

 

The Spanish Inquisition - Monty Pyton
The Hedge Sketch - Fry and Laurie
The Four Yorkshiremen - the Monty Python version

 

Spanish inquisition is a classic. My favourite Fry and Laurie is the sketch where Fry hits Laurie with the cricket bat and Laurie breaks character and claims that was 'too hard!'

 

From "The Kids in the Hall"

Headcrusher

"Mr. Tyzik (McKinney) is a lonely man who despises virtually everyone, especially those he considers businessmen and trendy people. He calls them "flatheads" because in his mind, their heads deserve to be crushed. He is more than willing to help by pretending to crush their heads from a distance with his fingers, using forced perspective, while enthusiastically declaring "I'm crushing your head! I'm crushing your head!" in a high-pitched nasal voice with a slight eastern European accent then making a crushing noise. In his own words: "Not everyone deserves to have their head crushed, just 99.99999% of them." When Mr. Tyzik is not actively crushing someone's head, he is talking to himself about why someone near him deserves to have their head crushed."

Canadian humour. Ya gotta be there.

 

Get oot, eh?

 

Python's Self-Defence Against Fresh Fruit is a sketch that springs to mind.

 

"...and mangoes in syrup!" Classic.

More Kids in the Hall:

30 Helens Agree

"Thirty women stand in a field and declare their agreement on some platitude; for example, "Thirty Helens agree: If you have a good idea, you should write it down." One time they disagreed, but later agreed to disagree. At one point, only 29 Helens agreed that promptness was important (the thirtieth Helen was running late)."

 

Speaking of the Kids in the Hall, the Head Crusher against the Face Pincher was a good one.

 

Fork Handles

 

I've got to go with this gem as being one of my favorites...

Pranksters with Christopher Walken

I have a really sick dark sense of humor

 

Not the Nine O'Clock News - Monty Python's worshipers

It helps if you are familiar with the controversy surrounding the release of Life of Brian, and especially the chat-show debate that the sketch parodies (there are clips of it here).

 

Ah but I like trucking, I like trucking, I like trucking and I like to truck

 

More Cowbell!

 

Impossible to explain unless you've seen it but Morecombe and Wise making breakfast/singing in the rain

 

Oh, I like all Fry and Laurie sketches where they break the character and/or the fourth wall and/or they interact with the audience. Like that restaurant sketch when this old man stands up in the audience and claims that Fry and Laurie stole his sketch.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Reg9YMlY6LU

Top-3 skit of all time.