JCC Transgender, nonbinary, genderqueer

I tried to find an influencer or something similar thread to put this in but couldn’t find one that fit.

anyway there is a YouTuber called Mrbeast. He is by far the biggest influencer on the site. Has 130 million subs on his English Channel alone. Anyway the reason I bring this up is the person who co-hosted the channel for years his good friend Chris (who as of now I think that’s still their name) came out as trans. He has been supportive of this, but didn’t really talk about it.

however recently the more ****** people attack them the more he responds. And while it’s real **** for Chris. Do you know how huge this is not just for Chris having a friend who will defend him. But because of all the kids that watch this guy.

this guy takes in almost 50 million views a video. Again he has 130 million subscribers on his main channel alone. Do you know how many little kids this could influence. I just wish more influencers were pro LGBTQ. I also wish they didn’t have as much say over kids. But kids love this dude. So him being pro trans people is a win for humanity

 

I'm not big on influencers but I like Mr. Beast's burger chain.

And obviously his support here.

 

Missouri targeting medical care for transgender adults now.

 

Yeah Kansas City's mayor said they'll fight the state orders and will not enforce them in the city.

Yes absolutely, obviously burgers are more important than people.

 

They're certainly more delicious than people, YMMV

 

Long pig mmm

 

You know I was talking to my dad about my cousin. Who changed their pronouns back in Jeez must have been 2011 at the latest. Anyway I was talking to him about my cousin and even still despite the fact we haven’t seen him in years and the fact my dad has Alzheimer’s he still to this day gets it correct. More so than others in my family who don’t have memory issues. And it’s not like anyone in my family would purposefully deadname him or misgender him it’s just sometimes they forget. My mom has straight up misgendered me and referred to me as my sister multiple times lol. So I really don’t think it’s intentional.



my point is though that whenever I see people being like oh it’s just to hard to remember that she is now he or he is now she or they. It’s just one of the dumbest excuses ever to be transphobic. If my dad can remember it even though we haven’t seen my cousin since like 2016 then I think anyone can.

 

My sister still will not use my younger nephew's correct pronouns. My nephew is nonbinary transmasculine and is ok with he/him while preferring they/them. My sister STILL calls them "she" even though it's been YEARS since my nephew made it clear that that is not ok. It causes so much friction during family visits. The rest of the family had a huge blowup with my sister over it last Christmas. When my sister tells me "you don't understand--it's hard for a parent," I get so angry I can't see straight. I, my husband, and my older nephew have all been through it with her again and again but nothing gets ever gets through. It's so frustrating. She just can't see how selfish and inconsiderate she is.

Even my 80 year old mom who has vascular dementia tries to switch to "he," though she only gets it right about 50 percent of the time and sometimes only when someone reminds her--but at least she tries. Also, I think my mom would get it right more often, but of course every time my sister talks to her, she refers to my nephew as "she," and of course that makes it harder for the change to stick with my mom (especially given her memory problems).

 

My cousin is going through something very similar right now, half the family has switched over to her new pronouns, while the other half (including her parents as far as I know) are still stuck in the past, whether out of ignorance (she's not broadcasted it on Facebook much) or denial.

 

It's beyond frustrating. On top of the fact that it is so disrespectful and contributes to my nephew's ongoing mental health struggles (unfortunately, they are still living with my sister and probably will be for the forseeable future), it's potentially a safety issue when she does it in public, as my nephew has had testosterone therapy and top surgery and is often read as male by strangers. They live in a more conservative part of CA and so when my sister refers to my nephew in public as "my daughter"/"she"/"her," that could potentially "out" them to people with anti-trans feelings, possibly putting them at higher risk of being a victim of harassment or even a hate crime.

edit: When we get on to her about it, then my sister does this thing where she just tries to avoid pronoun use altogether--just always using my nephew's name* in every place where there would normally be a pronoun or even just eliminating the subject of a sentence altogether...ex: instead of saying "M_____ wants to do such and such" or "she wants to do it," if asked something about my nephew where the context has established who is being talked about, she will just say "wants to do it" and just eliminate the subject altogether. Granted, my sister has always had problems with social communication (I believe she is probably on the spectrum, though she's never been tested), but it boggles my mind that she thinks eliminating the subject of a sentence altogether is easier/better than JUST MAKING THE DAMN SWITCH.....*sigh*

*the name issue itself has been a long struggle. My nephew ended up trying out two new names (one that only lasted a few months after they first came out as trans, and a 2nd one that lasted several years) before finally settling on the one they used for their legal name change (which was finalized last year). My sister never even tried to use the first new name, and then took over a year to even _start_ switching over with the subsequent names.

Which is quite ironic maddeningly stubborn because as an adult, my sister started going by a shortened version of her legal first name (because she always hated that name), and she has always wanted her family to use only the shortened version...but yet she drug her heels when her own adult child asked for the same consideration of being able to choose how people refer to them.

Sorry for the long-ish rant...can y'all tell I've got a lot of pent-up rage on this issue?

 

I have a question: I hear a lot about calling for transgender affirming care. What exactly does that entail? My guess is that its both physical and psychological? Is it for people transitioning only? Or those who transitioned and are having a hard time coping with the change? More controversially, does it include people who transitioned and now regret it and want to transition back?

 

So sorry you and your son are dealing with this kind of thing too, Lady B. I am very familiar with the playing of the "pity me" card--that's exactly the tone my sister uses too.

 

This post, should I neglect to disclaim, might seem like a bid for attention. And if that doesn't work, I go on a self-righteous tirade, trigger people and steal the spotlight.

Nope. You see, this is the epilogue... of the final episode... of my imaginary Netflix series.

Failure is the greatest teacher. Sometimes failure exists to motivate us onward... and other times it is telling us to stop and turn back. Wisdom is discernment. Solomon knew that wisdom is the greatest treasure, more precious than rubies. You gotta get real close and hold her how she needs.

Say to yourself, "it's all just sensation." No matter what happens, it's just nerves, and your mind telling you it's a big deal. No matter what befalls you, or how you fail, you can either turn it into annihilation, or you can let it add to your notoriety. The character development on the way to your badass final form.

My priest and I sit down once a week or so and talk about wounds. And how people act from trauma and past experience. There's a Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil work sheet. You fill in the Wounds, which lead to Lies, Vows, and Judgments. The tree is made of the Deadly Sins, like Wrath and Lust and Envy. And these bear fruit.

You'll be happy to know that I basically am Buffalo Bill.

Crossed with The Exorcist.

I made very clear to my priest and my Catholic brothers that I am not representative of all trans women. And beyond my qualities, most trans women aren't there to provoke your conservative sensibilities, or confuse and corrupt children, or hate on God's plan for each of us.

Humans are diverse. We're born with a wide array of differentiations, not to mention disabilities and issues. Be they physical or mental.

Jesus would be male with "strong female characteristics".

And accepting trans women into the church, as in acknowledging them as women, wouldn't have to be a slippery slope to more crazy stuff. The next step isn't to ordain atheist lesbians as clergy (that's the example I like to use). The next step isn't to canonize Lucifer as a saint.

There is no next step. Everything else can stay intact.

While "Roman Catholic therapy" has helped me, I don't want my experience being misused as evidence against my trans sisters.

And they will always be my sisters. Even though...

*Silence*

 

I've been going to Kaiser Permanente for my regular doctor and other things since early 2019. Kaiser can help transgender patients by providing a counselor on site (who is nonbinary) for us to speak with for basic things or to help us find other counselors in the area. My physician has prescribed estradiol for me since January 2019. Back in Texas, only endocrinologists did that, but it's nice that my regular doctor will do it. I presume they help transgender folks find the surgeons in Salem and Portland who can perform surgeries (either on the face, chest, or below). I had my surgery in 2014, so I haven't had to think about that other than just loving life.

For kids, it entails puberty blockers (which were originally developed for kids dealing with different issues), and these generally help transgender kids feel comfortable who they are. It prevents suicidal ideation. The only drawback that we know of might be affecting their memory. I was told that my taking of estrogen would lessen my memory, but I haven't observed that effect. I do have a remarkable memory, and so maybe it's harder for me to lose that than others. Not sure. I know mostly about what my fellow transgender women on Facebook tell me about it. Many of them have gotten face-related surgeries that I have not. So, transgender-affirming care depends on the individual. I don't know that much about care for transgender men beyond what one of my neighbors has told me about it. All I gotta say is that I'm happy for Elliot Page.

Well, you raised an interesting question, and from what I've heard, it's very rare for people who regret it and want to go back.

https://apnews.com/article/transgen...individual,Deaconess Medical Center in Boston.

There are some things that cannot be undone. For example, let's say I de-transition. (I obviously would not.) I had a vaginoplasty paid for by my Dad in 2014 in Plano, Texas, and I've been on estrogen (HRT) for nine years. My hips would remain wide. I guess my skin wouldn't be as soft as it is now. In some ways, it's too soft. That's really my only complaint about this. My skin was already very soft, and it became softer. So, now I can get minor skin injuries (like small cuts) easily if I'm not careful, and it wasn't quite this easy before. In my case, my emotions improved because of it. I felt like I was on menopause before I transitioned in 2014. I had a lot harder time dealing with depression and anxiety before this transition. I attribute the estrogen, my own willpower, and what I learned from my late Eponym made me generally stronger. There's this bad stereotype that transgender women become more emotional due to the transition. While it is true that emotions can be more like curves or ups and downs, many of us prefer it that way, since it may help us artistically or we felt that that was basically what we needed since childhood or puberty. The only thing that makes us seriously upset is rejection and mistreatment from society. So, in other words, in this country, bigots and idiots.

Tbh, I did not meet a transgender person until I was almost 30. And they had to educate me a lot about certain things. I felt like a cisgender lesbian, and it wasn't until about 2019 that I finally got the particular Millennial transgender humor on Facebook. I hung out with cisgender sorority girls and softball girls in college. I can understand why certain cisgender lesbian women would not be attracted to transgender women. But at the same time, I've read that cisgender lesbians are more willing to date trans women than other cis women are, and it make sense. I think the old school lesbian feminists have given lesbians in general a bad name. Most feminists are fourth- or third-wave feminists who believe everyone is equal. But the TERFs are usually second-wave feminists who are willing to work with the far-right to achieve their goals. This is why JK Rowling has cozied up with racist homophobes and fascists like Matt Walsh.

 

Thank you for sharing that. I have a problem with very very young kids wanting to transition, simply because, as we were all kids once, you think you want something now and then the next moment you change your mind, so parents that are willing to let a very young kid transitions just scares me. However, if the process is done not only with the parents participating in conjunction proper medical and psychological care and support, if it is in the kids's best interests, then Id be ok with it. But you read of some cases where parents jump the gun and just outright agree to whatever the kid feels at the moment, that just feels irresponsible. Let me be clear once more: I am only talking about really young kids, something like 10 and under.

 

Very young kids, pre-puberty, don't do anything for gender affirming care besides change clothes or hair or makeup if they feel like it. It's a myth that doctors are out there doing surgery on trans kids.

 

I have only met one kid who was pre puberty and came out as trans. They were really young like must have been 5-6 it was one of the teachers kids at my high school. I only saw them once though. But yea kids aren’t getting surgeries. That’s just a weird Republican fear tactic to make conservatives in America hate trans people more than they already would have.

 

Really looking forward to hearing about how the "if you're too sick to go to school you're too sick to play video games" parents are jumping the gun and doing whatever "makes the kid feels good" (why is that bad again?)

 

I wasn’t talking about them. But all true. Si.

 

What Solojones said about that. Sorry I didn’t clarify. Amber Briggle is an example of a great advocate and educated parent for trans kids. I feel bad for what she and her family have experienced in Texas. One of the hosts at Fishbowl Studios knows her. But, then, Texas is authoritarian state No. 2 after Florida these days.

 

I was taking an online seminar about sexual harrassment the other day(work mandated) and they linked a video about sexual diversity. I found it fascinating and very educational because it was very simple to understand and follow. Its in spanish but it has English subtitles so I will share.

 

We include tons of training on gender diversity at my company (where we create such training). Hell I wrote a lot of it..glad to see you were assigned similar training!