Amph What was the last movie you saw? (Ver. 2)

"Planet Earth", a failed TV pilot from Gene Roddenberry. Made in 1974, it's a reworking of his earlier failed pilot "Genesis II". Set in a remarkably pleasant-looking post-World War III Earth, it stars John Saxon as James T. Ki-, sorry, Dylan Hunt, a 20th century man revived from suspended animation. He works for the Federa-, sorry, Pax, a group trying to get human society to be peaceful and cooperative. In this episo-, sorry, movie, he has to find a missing surgeon who can save one of Pax's leaders. So, he and his team board the Enterpri-, sorry, an underground shuttle to an area where women rule and men are enslaved. Oh, and there are bumpy-headed mutants called Kling-, sorry, Kreeg, who cause trouble.
Yeah, it's pretty much a retread of TOS, with a good-sized dose of misogyny and supposed satire of male/female roles and slave culture. But it's also got a few fight scenes, including one catfight, and enough innuendo to make you think it's an edited version of an adult movie. (Multiple sources have said the Bird had certain... issues about dealing with women.) Even taking into account that it's from the early 70s, it can make for uncomfortable viewing at times. (There was one more try at the concept, a TV-movie called "Strange New World", with Saxon but not Roddenberry, and it didn't sell, either.)
I saw this tonight on "Movie Jo Night", and MJ and Chris were laughing along with the rest of us, when they weren't taken aback at the attitudes displayed.

 

The Swarm. Michael Caine has unabashedly appeared in a lot of crap for a paycheck, so when he calls this his worst film, you sit up and take note. I can remember back in the nineties there still being a panic about killer bees; it’s funny how that just sort of faded away, a crisis that turned out to be pretty much nothing. This movie is similarly a letdown.

It’s a big star-studded seventies disaster movie about a giant swarm of deadly killer bees. The first failing is that, unlike a plane crash or a sinking ship or a burning skyscraper, the threat is silly. It’s not a serious threat; it’s something out of a fifties creature feature. The movie’s struggle to make an impersonal swarm of bees menacing, as they depopulate a military base, threaten a town, and even nuke us when they take out a nuclear power plant, is never convincing. From the premise to the plotting to the acting to the corny side plots (will Olivia de Havilland marry Fred MacMurray or Ben Johnson? Oh never mind the bees derailed their train), it’s just impossible to take seriously. It’s a movie that’s bad in every dimension. Stupid and silly, it’s more like a parody of a dumb disaster movie than anything else. It’s not worth even morbid curiosity, because it doesn’t have the decency to at least be the fun kind of bad. It’s just dull and dumb.

 

Dunkirk 1958 war movie following 2 stories of this huge event in WWII history. The first follows a group of soldiers trying to get to the coast and avoid the Germans as they sneak their way through small villages, fields, woods and hedgerows. Meanwhile on the other side of the English channel the Navy are commandeering civilian boats to sail to Dunkirk and evacuate the soldiers, but the civilians want to play a greater part in the evacuation. Both stories converge at Dunkirk on the beach as the soldiers try to get the boats and avoid being picked off by the German attacks.

This is an absolute classic war movie, starring 3 very familiar stars. On the English side of the channel you have Richard Attenborough and Bernard Lee leading the way with their boats to get to Dunkirk, and on the French side you've got John Mills trying to get his group of men to the beach and evacuation. Its dramatic, tense, patriotic and all a bit quaint in places. Given the films age, the one thing it struggles with is effects, they have to use stock footage of the Stuka's attacking which doesn't match the grain of the actual movie and some of the boat footage at the end looks too studio bound and loses some scale. But it doesn't take away from whats a good film and an historical dramatisation about what happened on that fateful day. Of course I don't know how accurate this is and there are hundreds of stories it could tell, but it benefits by just focusing on two, one on each side of the channel.

 

I get nervous when I see people post paragraphs about this movie, so I'm genuinely relieved to see such a fair take. A View to a Kill is one of my all-time favourite Bond movies, but that's most definitely from a personal perspective. It was the first full Bond movie I saw, and the only one I had available to re-watch for a good few months in my obsessively nerdy youth. My school friends and I would endlessly quote it, spoof it, and make fun of it. One of 'em even wrote in my yearbook, "Remember, A View to a Kill is the best. Heed my words." With that kind of weight behind it, I'm always gonna love it, no matter what.

But sure, objectively, it's not perfect. Whilst I don't think it deserves its much-maligned reputation, I can step back and understand some of its most common criticisms. Heck, even Roger Moore admitted that it was his least favourite. Even so, he's still got charm for days, and at least he doesn't phone in his performance. You're right about Christopher Walken and Grace Jones, they're both excellent, as is Patrick Macnee. I do feel sorry for Tanya Roberts. Her character kinda devolves the longer she's on screen, because she starts out as this smart, tough hold-out against Zorin's plans, fighting him in court, bravely standing her ground, only to become a helpless screaming bit of skirt whenever anything mildly dangerous pops off. I suppose you could argue that there's a big difference between a geologist's office and a collapsing mine...? Nevertheless, there are still flashes of personality throughout (when she turns on the fire truck's siren, it always makes me smile) and I like that her relationship with Bond feels more natural and kinda sweet, at least in comparison to the series' norm.

Some of the action set-pieces really are superb. San Francisco rolled out the red carpet for the production, allowing them to "set fire" to City Hall an' everything. My one complaint would be the way they shot the fire truck jumping the bridge. They did it for real, but the angle is so awkward, you can barely tell. It's a rare instance of a wasted stunt, made all the more frustrating after the sequence in Paris, which contains one of the most underrated vehicle stunts in the series...



And we also agree about the music. It's one of John Barry's best scores, which is saying something. The melody for the title song is highly adaptable, working brilliantly when slowed for a romantic dinner or triumphantly overblown for a dramatic rescue.

Anyway, I'll leave you with one of the silly things my friends and I noticed, and made fun of the most. Something that today's youth might call "meme-worthy".

 

Let me make something clear, if it wasn't, I love the Bond films (up to Craig's take anyway). I can sit down and watch any of them and find something to enjoy. They are pure escapist cinema that I've grown up with from a young age. They all have something different in them and if one of them isn't quite to your tastes, then theres another film before or after that probably will be. Thats one of the beauties of a film series like this which was churning out a film near enough every 2 years, you can watch something a bit more small scale and serious like FYWL and then put on something with a lot more scope and less serious like TSWLM. Its amazing to think that they were making films to such a high standard so quickly. I think it benefitted greatly from having a settled crew and directors doing multiple films, it was such a well oiled machine that we probably won't see the like of again. But back to AVTAK, I enjoy it and will no doubt will sit down and watch it again some point in the near future. It actually reminds me of a summer away, it must have been 1986, with my parents when I was younger at a caravan park at the coast. The TVs in them had a dedicated film channel that was playing Clockwise, Sudden Impact, AVTAK and Mad Max 3 on a constant loop. This was where I first it, stuck in a caravan on a rainy day.

edit: Just seen online that AVTAK had its premiere 40 years ago today.

 

I just realized I've never seen A View to a Kill. The song's really good, though.

 

Heck, to begin with, they were making them annually. I might have my issues with Connery and how poorly his era has aged, but I absolutely recognise and respect the whole thing's tremendous significance and creative energy.

Awesome that we all have these kinds of stories.

What great timing! But darn it, had I known, I might have re-watched it this evening. Oh well. There's always the weekend.

 

it's nice seeing Rog and Patrick McNee together.

 

He gets a good death in it too.

 

We'd see the latest Bond and the ending blurb "James Bond will return in XYZ" completed the whole experience so nicely.

 

Give it a whirl, see what you think.

 

Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom On my firestick cracked software there are some 24/7 film channels dedicated to various franchises. These basically play the films on a continuous loop. My favourites that I've set up on there are Die Hard, Indy (doesn't include DOD), James Bond classic (up to the end of the Dalton era) and Star Wars (Doesn't include Solo or RO).

Having flicked on to the Indy channel last night it was at the end of Raiders, so I carried on watching (because sometimes they play films out of order), sure enough it rolls straight into TOD. I remember playing this film to death in the 80's on video, my dad got a pirate copy after it came out for home rental which would have been around 85 or possibly 86. At the time I always thought it wasn't as good Raiders and that there was too much of a lull in that middle act from landing in India to the Thuggee ceremony, but seeing as it was fresh and new I watched it repeatedly. Since that time in the 80s I hardly revisited the film in its entirety, but as the years have gone by and I got the DVD and blu ray release's I've grown to appreciate it much more. I find it to be a bit fresher than the others from the OT, probably because I haven't watched it as much in the last 35 years. But what a ride the film is, it really does set a high bar for action cinema that very few films come close to IMO. Harrison Ford is arguably at his peak in this. I love the darker tone than Raiders, but we do get moments of levity with some slapstick humour. I've never really found Willie to be annoying, I can see why they wanted to go with a different character to Marion rather than repeat her. Having a kid in a sequel is a bit of a movie cliche now, but Shortround isn't that bad at all, hes quite charming. But its such a great film, a literal rollercoaster of a movie, that takes me right back to the mid 80's, a carefree time as a kid and a decade where we got great film after great film year on year. For me its overtaken TLC as my second favourite behind Raiders.

 

Last night I watched Ocean's Eleven for the first time. Mindless fun. One nitpick though, I don't think the bank robbers faced a single setback throughout the entire movie. The only one that comes to mind is when the tiny Asian guy gets his hand stuck for a second.

 

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice (2024)

It's a big ****ing mess (just like the first one) but it's still a lot of fun and one of the better legacy sequels. I enjoyed it. It's probably the best Tim Burton film I've seen since at least Sweeny Todd

Bad Boys: Ride or Die (2024)

Probably not as good a movie as 4 Life (which I know I saw on opening night and enjoyed but barely remember) and nowhere near as bat**** insane as II (but no action movie can be), but I still enjoyed it. Smith and Lawrence have good chemistry and aren't phoning it in just yet. I wouldn't mind if they made another one

Pets (2025)

Cute Disney + documentary about how we bond with our pets and vice versa. A lot of interesting furry animals on display

 

I plan on seeing Sinners this weekend. Would anyone hint at a good moment for a restroom break? A teensy spoiler is okay.

 

There's a surreal musical number in a barn which probably goes long enough for you to take care of business and get back to your seat.

 

I also saw MI8
It's half a great movie, the second half being far better than the first. Amazing stunts and editing, the air and underwater sequences are brilliantly done even if they're somewhat implausible.

I would have preferred a different ending.

Spoiler

So the team just part ways at the end? What's to stop them coming back again when another Impossible Mission situation occurs? Hunt is not the retire and do nothing type, I think he should have sacrificed himself at the end to aid the team in succeeding.
That way is absolutely is the finale if the main character is dead

 

Wild Robot

p[Hands up in the air confused emoji/]

why did this movie get so much attention? its ****

 

An Extremely Goofy Movie (2000)

I had thought that I watched this once before; maybe I did decades ago, but I don't remember it. So I watched it today for maybe the first time, maybe not. This was primarily the forgotten film; even though the VA reprised their roles, they didn't even bother talking about it at all in the Goofy Movie Documentary on D+. The film itself actually got better critical reviews than the original; but IMO I don't see why. It's hard to care at all about Max's story; he's going to college mainly to skateboard with his friends in the X-Games. Oh, and to get away from his dad who he's embarrassed about again. The girl that Max would move the world for in the original movie is completely out of the picture now. At least Goofy's story is somewhat more charming. After losing his job, he has a hard time finding work because he doesn't have a degree. So you can guess what happens next. It's almost like an animated version of Rodney Dangerfield's, "Back to School". And yes, Goofy steals the show. No musical numbers, but there's a memorable Saturday Night Fever-esque disco scene with Goofy and a new love interest. Overall it's kind of forgettable; I'd watch the original 50 times before seeing this one again.

 

MI8 (2025)
Too long, but it (mostly) held my interest. The scene in the sunken submarine dragged. I never did buy into the entity as a serious threat, so that didn't work for me. Of course most of the action scenes were good. I really like watching Pom Klementieff fight, but I wish she'd had more to do. Can you guess my favorite part? Same as any movie that has biplanes.

 

A Midsummer Night’s Sex Comedy. A fairly light early-eighties Woody Allen romance-comedy, this is one of the few films from that era of his work that was generally considered disappointing. I rather liked it. It’s a riff on the classic couples-mix-and-match sex comedy format that goes back to Shakespeare, a circa-1900 period piece at a country house with three couples.

The hosts are goofy inventor Woody Allen and his wife Mary Steenburgen, who are suffering from lack of sexual chemistry. Steenburgen’s cousin, exceptionally pompous professor Jose Ferrer, is marrying a much younger woman, Mia Farrow, who happens to be a former flame of Allen’s. Allen missed the opportunity to make love to her when they were young, and is still obsessed with her. Also invited is Allen’s friend Tony Roberts, a womanizing doctor, who brings as his date free-spirited Julie Hagerty. Roberts falls for Farrow, while Allen struggles with his attraction; meanwhile Ferrer chases Hagerty.

I find that a lot of these films don’t work because they expect us to find the back-and-forth entertaining in itself. This film works because it’s the characters and their dynamics that are interesting, and Allen uses the scenario to explore the idea of missed chances and the subtleties of chemistry. Allen’s films are also usually a love letter to some facet of his tastes, and here he lavishes affection on lovely shots of the countryside and the beauty of a fine day in nature, period charm, and the Mendelssohn soundtrack. It’s a gently funny film, light on outright zingers but still displaying some of Allen’s wit, warm and humorous and pleasantly lightweight even with its meditations on romance.