Amph What was the last movie you saw? (Ver. 2)

It may have been played on ITV uncut. TV broadcasters don't have to adhere to BBFC edits and it's not unlikely that the distributer could have sent them a print with the horse jump left in.

 

Justice League

This movie is not worth watching. The Flash provided some comic relief, Wonder Woman almost had some character development, all the superheroes deserve an entire movie for an introduction rather than the rush job they get here. The villain was unremarkable. A vague threat to the entire world and the most literal deus ex machina since Shakespeare's day make this the tired blockbuster to skip this holiday season.


Thor: Ragnarok

Watch this movie instead of Justice League. This is the best Thor entry and funniest, most entertaining Marvel movie I have seen since Guardians of the Galaxy. The villain looks silly but there is a lot of silliness in this movie. I'm a little behind in the MCU but I had an opportunity to watch this one and am glad I did.

 

Death Wish 3. An awful piece of rubbish, but a highly entertaining piece of rubbish.

 

Never Say Never Again and Octupussy ranked higher than Thunderball and YOLT? Oh lordy. And Golden Gun is one of the worst. I loved it as a child because of the martial arts scenes, but even Christopher Lee isn't enough to save it.
Odd too to make note of the almost pornograpy sounding plot of Octopussy when Majesty's Service is about how Bond spends his evenings bedding every woman at Blofeld's hideout and both discovers the villain plot and blows his cover because of these night-time activities.

What I find fascinating about the Bond series is there is something to like about every one of them. They all have something to enjoy. Even the worst of them have great moments or interesting ideas.

 

Shaolin Abbot (1979) Great version of carrying on the shaolin monk tradition. David Chiang's young monk is charged by his dying master to solicit funds to rebuild the destroyed Shaolin Temple and is tested by Lo Lieh's infamous Pai Mei (yeah, the real one. Not Gordon Liu's gentile version from Kill Bill.) Ho Meng-Hua was one of Shaw Brothers' most versatile directors, he covered almost every genre. His late 70s output with Chiang boasts some good dramatic moments and fun kung fu. You can really see Chiang's martial arts prowess grow between Shaolin Hand Lock and this film. I am not big on shaolin monks, but I'll make time when my three fu faves (including Chiang) play them because they're so good at the dramatic and kung fu elements.

The Living Dead at the Manchester Morgue (1974) Got sucked into this again because of Ray Lovelock (he's always my reason for watching this.) Love this movie and it still creeps me out (lately I have to watch it over a period of several days), but still my most favorite zombie movie ever made.

 

Thor: Ragnarok



This was the second time I've seen the film and I left the theater more satisfied than I did the first time as I picked up on a few more things.

Definitely thumbs up!

 

i watched the magnificent seven remake with denzel and chris pratt. i kept falling out of the story and getting lost more in the production details of the sets and costumes, how shots were framed, etc. i think this is a thing that can happen particularly when i watch period pieces, but also i am a fan of the seven samurai and the original western with yul brynner and steve mcqueen so i think already knowing the story may have been a factor. this version only makes superficial changes to the original and basically hits all the same beats, only with an inferior cast and without anything to really justify its existence. just watch the original.

i also watched chasing trane, an excellent documentary about john coltrane. great insights from his contemporaries, family and those who followed in his footsteps, balanced with a great mix of recordings and live performances.

edit: oh i forgot to mention that the magnificent seven does feature an extremely bizarre performance from vincent d'onofrio, where he basically plays bob odenkirk doing charles manson. probably the most accidentally entertaining element in the film.

 

A View to a Kill - Moore's final outing, he really looks like an old man here.

The James Bond theme in the pre-credits opener is a terrible rock inspired version. I don't need a guitar solo during the James Bond theme. Snowboarding to The Beach Boys' California Girls? I like the Beach Boys, but how about we cut the The Beach Boys? Boarding over a pond is cool, but how about we cut The Beach Boys? The little boat disguised as an iceberg is cool, but how about we cut The Beach Boys? There are some cool things happening here, but they just insist on ruining it.

God damn I love the title song, it has an amazing build up. The glow in the dark stuff works well enough, and I can't criticize the women just writhing around.

The Silicon Valley plot is different and modern, and I welcome it. At least it's not another plot involving nukes or subs.

Nice to see Moneypenny out of the office, even if it is just to take in a horse race.

Trivia: Jenny Flex is portrayed by the same actress who portrayed Elsa in The Last Crusade. The Elsa who could not Let It Go. Dolph Lundgren makes an appearance in the background as KGB muscle. David Yip is Bond's contact in Silicon Valley. You might remember him as Indy's friend from Temple of Doom. "I go first, Indy!"

Tanya Roberts, the actress who played Midge on That 70s Show, is the Bond girl here, and she's terrible. She adds nothing to the movie.

The scene where Walken is supposedly picking out Bond's horse is truly great, the most memorable for me. Walken brings a wonderful sense of amusement to the role. Despite his total psychopathy, there seems to be a genuine father-son relationship between him and the Nazi doctor.

This is more serious than Moonraker or Octopussy, but Moore still adds nothing to the role.

Have to admit, the fire truck chase is...unique. Don't think I've seen that elsewhere. After the fire truck chase, the movie just kinda goes "okay, time to blow things up now".

I had fonder memories than the reality, likely due to the craziness of Walken and Grace Jones, and the kickass title song, but there's just not much to it. Not a lot going on, and Moore gives absolutely nothing to the role, not even his typical humor. What little amusement there is to be had is created by the sheer insanity of Walken and Grace Jones. My recommendation is to watch the title sequence, then skip all the way to the end credits to listen to it again, and pretend there's a movie that matches in between.

Roger Moore's final showing, he will not be missed. Lois Maxwell will.

Moore's run did not produce a single classic Bond movie, entirely because Moore's silly style goes way too far and holds them back. Every movie he was in was destined to be schlock. Schlock of varying quality, but schlock. His run is epitomized by the likes of Moonraker and Octopussy. They may not be his best movies, but they are by far the most Moore.

Moonraker really was where Moore's run went off the cliff, in favor of going full Moore. Look at what came before it; LALD, TMWTGG, and TSWLM. Wasn't going too badly there, but Moonraker tipped it over the edge. It was inevitable, however. It's just where they would inevitably go with Moore, because he couldn't go anywhere else. He wasn't capable of anything more than a parody, a caricature of Bond. He was just a poor choice for the role, imo. Well, we can say we've parodied Bond, seven films worth. Been there, done that. Let's not go back any time soon, or for more than one movie ever again.

Very tough to rank, but it gets its spot mostly by not being as utterly ******* stupid or boring as the movies I ranked below it. I graded it as a failure, but only just barely. It just needed more (not Moore). Maybe an effective Bond actor and a Bond girl that added anything. There are a few things there that maybe could have been fleshed out more. The relationship between Zorin and the Nazi scientist. Zorin's background as a crazy steroid baby. May Day's heroic turn, and May Day herself, because I love Grace Jones. I don't think it's actively terrible, it just needed more work. I would say it was too bad that such an incomplete effort was handed in for what would be Moore's final outing, but Moore didn't give the film any effort himself.

Rankings

On Her Majesty's Secret Service
FRWL
Goldfinger
Dr. No
TMWTGG
The Spy Who Loved Me
Live and Let Die
Never Say Never Again
Octopussy
A View to a Kill
For Your Eyes Only
Moonraker
Thunderball
You Only Live Twice
Diamonds Are Forever


Don't mind the rankings too much. Moore's entire run is an interchangeable mess, I could put 5-11 in any order.

I have to say it, at this point, the Bond film series just wasn't very good. Three classic movies and four legitimately terrible movies in fifteen attempts, and the rest aren't particularly worthwhile. I haven't really been enjoying my watch-through up to this point (or I haven't really enjoyed it since OHMSS), too many of these movies aren't really worth watching on their own, I only trudged through them for the sake of being thorough and complete. Thankfully, the downward trend Moore set should change with Dalton's brief run.

 

A View to a Kill is sorta the Bond film of my childhood. I suppose I'd seen bits and pieces of the previous films over the years (I seem to recall ABC would air them leading up to the release of the latest), buthaving just turned 11 (two days before the release of the film) I was getting plugged into pop culture via MTV and the video for the title song aired on a loop that Summer. The Living Daylights was the first Bond film I saw at the theater, but AVTAK was my baptism in Bond and I loved it.

At some point thereafter I just slowly fell in line w/the popular opinion that it was a bad entry w/a great theme, but revisiting it right around the time Craig took over the role I discovered that it was easily my favorite outing by Moore. Awesome theme (and John Barry score) aside, I thought Walken was great, Grace Jones fun (and w/a cheeky chemistry w/Moore) and the finale genuinely entertaining. I also thought Moore looked far better here than he did in Octopussy (I've heard rumors he had some work done in between).

I agree %110 w/you re: Tanya Roberts. Awful, awful actress, but wow what a stunner. That she looks to be closer to being Moore's granddaughter than love interest certainly doesn't help matters.


American Assassin (2017) - Plot; After a devastating brush with terrorism, a young man forges himself into a human weapon bent on vengeance, catching the attention of the CIA.

There's very little fat on this adaptation of the late Vince Flynn's Mitch Rapp series, but even less meat. It's efficient, competent and at times compelling, but it never quite manages to raise itself above standard genre fare. - 6/10

 

Alien: Covenant

It's awesome.

 

Trophy (2017) – Cristina Clusiau, Shaul Schwarz

Trophy is a documentary about trophy hunting in Africa and the industry that has sprung up around it. The film has a broad focus; it comes at the topic in a lot of different ways. It looks at the tourists (almost always American) who go to Africa to engage in trophy hunting; the people who run the hunting businesses; conservationists who go to great lengths to try to stop it; and more. The parallels to Blackfish, a documentary I absolutely loved from a few years ago about the mistreatment of killer whales at Sea World, are obvious, but this film is actually very different in tone. I loved Blackfish’s righteous indignation and anger; it was a real polemic of the kind you rarely see these days. But Trophy is sad more than it’s angry and it is also a movie that’s trying very hard to get into nuances of this debate. There’s a guy who runs a hunting business that argues, and genuinely believes, that trophy hunting is the secret to saving species from extinction, that as long as these animals are making money they’ll always be around. There’s a heartwrenching scene where you see his real love for these animals come through and yet he’s essentially breeding animals and raising them just to release them to be brutally killed by hunters. There’s a sequence that follows a group of anti-poacher conservationists, but they’ve had to hire private security forces to stop poachers because the government can’t handle the problem; when these private security forces raid a suspected poacher’s house at night and put machine guns up to the heads of his wife and young children, you can’t help but wonder exactly where you draw some lines. The film then doesn’t really demonize any of its subjects; it just presents the issues in some really troubling ways. The film would be troubling enough just philosophically, but the film was released unrated because of the most haunting element of the film: a lot of violent, disturbing animal death. The movie, as it wrestles with a lot of other issues, seems to believe that only one thing is absolutely true: the act of killing these animals is ugly and disturbing. So, the camera just sits on these acts of violence and lets you feel them down to the bone. In one scene, a band of hunters down an elephant and deliver the fatal shot. But once that shot is delivered, it still takes the animal time to die. And the camera just sits on the downed elephant, on the faces of the man who’ve killed it, as we watch it struggle for breath, struggle to move, finally succumb. The shots of the men, waiting around for the animal to die, are almost unbearable. They look at the ground, at the sky, never at each other; it’s a scene of intense awkwardness, as if they’ve snuffed out a life, but they can’t allow them to celebrate it, as they indeed do, until the struggle for life is finally over. There’s an even more disturbing scene with a crocodile, but I’ll leave that for the viewer to discover on their own. One of the main characters, Philip, a Texan who is obsessed with completing his set of big game kills, is a man that becomes very unlikable, but when the climax of the film finally comes, it’s on one of his expeditions. No spoilers, but it’s one of the most troubling and unsettling scenes in the film, precisely because the movie just sits with him and refuses to tell us how we should feel. It’s as powerful a movie climax as I’ve seen this year and a deeply, deeply haunting one. Trophy isn’t for the faint of heart perhaps, but I think it’s a movie that absolutely cries out to be seen. As a cinematic experience, it’s gripping, compelling, terrifying, heart-breaking and beautiful. It’s a film that will leave you deeply troubled for a whole host of reasons. Trophy is going to fly right under the radar; it’s a very small documentary and it has the added stigma of actually featuring real, often violent animal death, but then maybe that’s the key to understanding this film. Most nature documentaries feature animal death as they explore the predator-prey relationship. It’s just that in this particular case, humanity is the predator. With those other predators, the reasons for the kill are pretty obvious: survival. When it comes to us, to the people in this film, the reasons aren’t nearly as clear. 4 stars.

tl;dr – gripping, disturbing documentary examines the world of big-game hunting in Africa; surprisingly nuanced & artistic, but also intensely troubling and haunting, this is a must-see. 4 stars.

 

Secret in Their Eyes



In a word: Flat

Going into this film, I thought it was going to be a murder mystery, but it wasn't. Early on, the film points out the murder suspect and then spends the rest of the film trying to prove the guilt of the murder suspect while battling office politics and the greater evil. Thus, the film boils down to personal obsessions/passions and moral values in a post 9/11 world. There's also a boring and unnecessary romantic tension between two of the characters.

I didn't find the film thrilling or intriguing by film's end. I was just happy it was over.

 

its not even the Beach Boys , I think it was Gidea Park

 

Hunt for the Wilderpeople (2016)
I found it as funny as its reputation suggested. Worth a watch, especially if you enjoyed What We Do in the Shadows and/or Thor:Ragnarok.

 

The Living Daylights

Whoa. 00s versus SAS in a training exercise? Awesome. Nice twist to it, too.

Damn I loooooove the electronic James Bond Theme, it works so well when the action spins up. I can't stop whistling along to it, it gets me bouncing. It's my favorite James Bond Theme so far.

The title credits sequence is decent and the title song works well with it and the rest of the movie and soundtrack (it's used effectively throughout the movie). The score for this movie is amazing, with creative remixes and those fantastic leitmotifs. It really primes me for the action. I think it's the best overall musical score for any Bond movie so far.

I don't actually care for the title song in isolation, it doesn't work for me separated from the movie like some of the others do, but that's perfectly okay.

We have a new Moneypenny. They went with a nerdy, mousy type who likes Barry Manilow. It's pretty cute, but there's not much there, other than a longing sigh.

Ah, the "ghetto blaster", something for the Americans. Has Q ever come off more like an old, out of touch, paternal Englishman? Not a problem, just...amusingly outdated.

I actually enjoy the song Necros listens to on his walkman, it meshes so well with the Bond theme, and it fits the idea I have of him being a douchey, blonde haired, blue eyed Eurotrash German, with his electric blue speedo. It really works every time he shows up. He's actually a very convincing and inventive killer, though. I like him a lot.

Krabbe does a terrible, terrible job as Koskov, to the point that he is not believable as anything, regardless of what he was going for, what the script was going for, or how you interpret him.

The fight between Necros and the English guard in the kitchen is actually really good, they let the guard put up a really good scrap instead of having Necros steamroll him. The whole Koskov kidnapping sequence in England is really exciting, with Necros tossing milk bombs left and right.

General Sallah replaces General Gogol as the head of the KGB, but he doesn't stick around past this movie.

Maryam d'Abo as Kara is...unremarkable, at best. She's actually pretty lousy.

The switch with the car and the cello case in the phone booth (when's the last time you used a payphone?) is actually pretty clever. It's nice to see a bit of mundane spy trickery.

I love Dalton's delivery during the escape from Bratislava. There are a bunch of Moore type quips, but he still manages to sound like someone actually involved in dangerous work, instead of a goofball clown.

"I've had a few optional extras installed."

He can even play that straight and make it believable. It makes seem natural and real, instead of a goofy spy movie parody. I think the whole sequence demonstrates the difference between Dalton and Moore quite well. Moore is for children. Dalton is for adults. Adults like me.

Sledding to the border in a cello case kinda ruins it, though. Oh well, this is their first go with Dalton, so it's like a test run. They're still shaking out the Moore bugs.

Whitaker is a ridiculous, terrible character, even though the movie is aware of it, it doesn't make it any better.

Necros' trick with the automatic sliding door was pretty neat.

Since I've made a habit of pointing out casting trivia, Sallah's girlfriend is the warrior woman from Road Warrior, Zhaan from Farscape.

With Sallah's fake death and Kara's brief betrayal, the plot lines converge effectively. Slows a bit getting to the ending, but not enough to induce boredom. The ends are wrapped up, but with a whimper. Necros' death is pretty weak. He clings to Bond's boot when there's the net to hold on to. Too bad, he was the only good villain in the movie. Bond stupidly shoots at Whitaker's gun shield, when there's a whole lot of Whitaker around it to shoot.

Is to Dalton what Dr. No is to Connery, a primitive but very effective first outing, with the best soundtrack in the series so far and an excellent performance by Dalton more than enough to carry it through some of the weakest villains in the series, an unremarkable Bond girl, some moldy leftovers from Moore's run, and an ending that fizzles out. Still one of the best in the series.

Rankings

On Her Majesty's Secret Service
FRWL
Goldfinger​

The Living Daylights
Dr. No
TMWTGG
The Spy Who Loved Me
Live and Let Die
Never Say Never Again
Octopussy
For Your Eyes Only
Moonraker
Thunderball
You Only Live Twice
Diamonds Are Forever​

Already way better than anything Moore made.

 

Timothy Dalton is my second favorite Bond. Always felt he nailed that role.

 

Okay, lotta catch up on the Bond series. Since there's so much, I'll keep my comments (relatively) brief.

I really love Octopussy. It's really quite hilarious. I think that the general consensus is correct that in the last couple of Moore films the series basically turned into a parody of Bond, but the thing about Octopussy is that it's an on-point parody. Octopussy is a better Bond spoof than the Austin Powers films. If the "that's my little octopussy" line doesn't tip you off, I don't know what will. I still vividly remember just pausing the movie and laughing like a crazy person the first time I watch the film and hit that line. That said, I do genuinely like the knife throwing villains; the ultimate fight with them on the train is one of the better action sequences of the Bond franchise.

Never Say Never Again is moderately solid. It's refreshing to see Connery in the role after years of Moore and the film is far-superior to Thunderball, the first version of this story. I think the way the movie references Bond getting older is one of the best things about it. The "free radicals" joke is a riot. But I think its placement in the Moore years makes it look better than it is. I should revisit it probably as I've only seen it once, but I think it's probably not much more than reasonably solid; in the context of the Moore years, that makes it seem like genius.

A View to a Kill is a little better than Moore at his worst, I think. I like the Patrick Macnee character quite a bit and wish he'd been in the film more. I adhere to the conventional wisdom on this one though; Walken & Jones really make the movie and they're both so perfect for their roles that it's almost unbelievable. My most vivid memories of the film are of Grace Jones lifting a Russian thug up over her head to prove a point and of Christopher Walken bursting into laughter upon realizing that he's about to die. That kind of says it all. Besides those two performances, the movie is pretty forgettable.

The Living Daylights is a really great one in my opinion. It has its flaws, but it also has something actually approximating a story in terms of an actual spy thriller with cross/double-cross kind of stuff; the fight at the safe-house is a perfect example of a great, hard-hitting action sequence that doesn't even feature Bond at all and I really dig that this movie kind of expands things into a world where, for story reasons, Bond isn't involved in some of the story. It's rather like in FRWL when the movie allows Kerim Bey to kill one of the villains with a sniper rifle while Bond just kind of hangs around in the scene. I like the story with Koskov/Pushkin/Gogol (and I don't think Krabbe is bad at all). Necros is a cool villain, like you said. And the action here is, for the most part, more hard-hitting and intense with the geriatric Moore out and a more athletic Bond in. Dalton really comes in hot and owns the role in my opinion; this is definitely not Moore and after Moore, that's a real pleasure.

On Her Majesty's Secret Service
From Russia With Love
The Living Daylights
Goldfinger
The Spy Who Loved Me
Dr. No
Never Say Never Again
For Your Eyes Only
Octopussy
A View to a Kill
The Man With the Golden Gun
You Only Live Twice
Diamonds Are Forever
Live & Let Die
Moonraker
Thunderball

As for the music . . . All Time High is certainly the most boring Bond theme. It doesn't sound anything like a Bond theme and the production is dreadfully smooth. I think it's one of the very worst themes in terms of just sounding like a really bland radio pop tune. I actually had to look up the theme for Never Say Never Again because I couldn't remember it; I've heard all the others several times because of their inclusion on different Bond compilation albums, but this one always gets left out because of its "unofficial" status. Anyway . . . yeah, it's bad. Okay, I'm actually playing it again right now. It's actually ****** terrible. I mean, there's not even a hook. I think I'm supposed to like View to a Kill since it's Duran Duran and it's very eighties while still having some Bondy elements; but I find it to be pretty middle of the road - nothing really bad about it, not even the very eighties production, but also not a lot to recommend it. In a controversial opinion, I actually like The Living Daylights a lot better and actually just a lot in general. It's my favorite of the "check it out - it's THE EIGHTIES" Bond themes. I really like the hook. It has some Bond-theme elements, but that "ah ah ah ah the living daylights" hook is pure pop and I really like it.

James Bond Theme (from Dr. No)
Diamonds Are Forever
Nobody Does It Better (from The Spy Who Loved Me)
The Living Daylights
On Her Majesty's Secret Service
You Only Live Twice
Live & Let Die
Opening Titles: James Bond is Back/From Russia With Love/James Bond Theme
A View to a Kill
Goldfinger
The Man With the Golden Gun
For Your Eyes Only
Moonraker
All Time High (from Octopussy)
Thunderball
Kingston Calypso (from Dr. No)
Never Say Never Again

EDIT: I also just posted this and I already disagree with my rankings. Is Never Say Never Again really demonstrably better than For Your Eyes Only? Did I really just rank the Duran Duran song above Shirley Bassey's Goldfinger? Oh, well, I'm going with my gut on the original rankings and then being pretty mercenary in terms of not changing my rankings. So I'll leave as they are. But, yeah, these rankings are very arbitrary. And how are the From Russia with Love opening titles under Live & Let Die? What was I smoking that day?

 

View to a Kill does have a very clever escape from death scene where Bond stays underwater and breathes from the cars tyres .

 

Watched a lot of movies over the weekend.

Ghost In The Shell (both versions)
Kubo And the Two Strings
Princess Mononoke
Alien: Covenant
Alien: Resurrection

 

Licence To Kill

I thought the gun barrel sequence for TLD was great. Well, I don't like the one for LTK at all. They tried to get too fancy with the theme and it's just totally off beat and unrecognizable.

Felix is getting married. I'm sure this will end well.

The intro to the title song is pretty strong. It gets your attention. You can tell they borrowed from Goldfinger, as others had done before them. They try to use "Licence to Kill" as the basis for the lyrics, but of course it's total nonsense. "And you know I'm going straight for your heart". No, you're not. Not with those lyrics. It's just a poor song and a poor sequence because of it. There's no energy to it once you get past the first few seconds. Disappointing music to start the movie in comparison with TLD.

They played Bond appropriately solemn during the wedding. It would have been an easy mistake to have Bond hooking up with bridesmaids. I never really thought about how finding another bride dead on her wedding day would trigger Bond.

Sanchez is an all time great villain. Plomo o plata. He throws Felix to a ******* shark. "He disagreed with something that ate him". AH HA HA.

A very young Benicio Del Toro as Sanchez's henchman. I don't think he was anything special here, but there wasn't much to the role.

Bond sinks the traitor to the sharks with his own suitcase full of money. HE'S GOT A LICENCE TO KILL.

A bizarrely dark M here. "We're not a country club, 007!" It's almost a mirror of the KGB in A View to a Kill. "No one leaves the KGB!" They even have a sniper open fire on Bond. When the hell did they get so ruthless and controlling?

Bond executes the guy who killed his sidekick by shooting him in the heart with a spear gun. HE'S GOT A LICENCE TO KILL, AND YOU KNOW HE'S GOING STRAIGHT FOR YOUR HEART.

Bond cuts up the drugs under water, does a bit of water skiing, throws two guys out of a plane and steals the drug money. It's a strong sequence with Bond on a rampage of revenge, looking to **** up everyone in his path. This is what happens when you piss Bond off.

The waitress at the Bimini bar gives Bond a flirtacious smile and he hardly notices her. No time for that. Solid characterization, no distractions.

They gave Carey Lowell a terrible wig. She couldn't ditch it soon enough. Carey Lowell's Bond girl is strangely written. Her opening scene makes it seem like they're trying to put her on equal terms with Bond, but really she's just petty, pouty, needy, jealous and thin skinned. She doesn't even qualify as a straw feminist, she's just a shrew. She has her moments of competence, but she's still a neurotic woman, and certainly nowhere near on equal footing with Bond. Disappointing Bond girl for a movie with strong writing, but it hardly matters.

******* Wayne Newton. He pretty much plays himself, and Sanchez is as amused with him as I am. Sanchez kissing his iguana cracks me up. Bless your hearts.

Dalton does a convincing job as Bond the rich jerk throwing money around. Everything in the casino is really sharp spy stuff. The meeting with Sanchez is one of my favorites in the series, all clipped conversations between two very dangerous opponents.

I help people with problems.
Problem solver.
More like a problem eliminator.

I think only Dalton could have pulled that off. Not even Craig could do it.

"Remember, you're only president for life."

Inquisitor Jerec shows up as a servant of His Imperial Her Majesty's government. Interesting. Cary Tagawa is underused in a minor role. Sanchez shoots him after he commits suicide. You don't quit Sanchez, Sanchez fires you.

It's very cool the way the raid works out in Bond's favor and Bond rolls with it and starts sabotaging Sanchez from within. The plot gets fairly dense here and plays off the characters' motivations. Maybe it pushes suspension of disbelief just a little, but it's a lot more complicated than most Bond plots, which tend to be very simple.

You're not gonna believe who this guy is.
Former British agent.
How'd you know that?
Because I know things.

This terse mafia talk cracks me up, but every time someone says "personal vendetta" I want to shoot myself.

Do I have this right? He waterskis behind the plane, jumps on it...
No, no. He was, uh...well yeah, he threw the pilots out and flew away.
Like a little bird.

Bond's heroics really do sound difficult to believe if you didn't see them. It's a clever bit of self-awareness.

Bond plants the money on Krest and turns Sanchez against him. We're getting into Yojimbo territory here.

That's not my money, I swear.
That's right, amigo, it's mine.

Love the dialogue in this movie, it's among the best in the series.

Lupe is a weak character, poorly acted, but there was one bit of info that ran contrary to the usual routine, the idea that she doesn't want to go back home, that it was a crappy place that she made sacrifices in order to escape.

It's interesting that Sanchez, like Bond, doesn't care about the money at all. He's willing to blow up his own tankers if it means getting revenge.

During the action at the end I kept anticipating the James Bond Theme from TLD.

It's neat that they were able to pull it off, but I could have done without the truck popping a wheelie and driving tipped over on one side.

Sanchez receives an explosive overkill courtesy the lighter given to James by Felix. A fittingly painful death after all the pain he's dished out.

Another excellent Bond film from Dalton. Dalton and Bond are smoldering, Davi is a lot of fun as the villain, the dialogue is perhaps the best in the series and the plot far outstrips most Bond efforts. The only letdown is the music.

I ranked it right between Goldfinger and The Living Daylights, with all three very close in score.

Rankings


On Her Majesty's Secret Service
FRWL
Goldfinger
Licence to Kill
The Living Daylights
Dr. No
TMWTGG
The Spy Who Loved Me
Live and Let Die
Never Say Never Again
Octopussy
For Your Eyes Only
Moonraker
Thunderball
You Only Live Twice
Diamonds Are Forever

And just like that, Dalton is gone. Two outings, two classics. Can't do better than a perfect run.

 

Goldeneye - Brosnan's first outing and the first Bond in six years, the largest gap between Bond movies in history. It's even better than I remembered. Sorry for the long gush rambling, but I just loved it. By all means, skip to the summary and ranking at the end.

The gun barrel image itself has been upgraded and now looks much slicker, and Bond appears closer (larger) to the gun itself. The blood pour and the barrel sway are perfect. I like it, though again I think they got too cute with the theme.

Pretty spectacular opening with Bond bungee jumping off a dam. Bond sneaks into the facility through the vent shaft and into the bathroom. This is real spy sneaking stuff to me, more Solid Snake than hiding in plain sight. Like the music here, too.

It's always cool to get another 00, and Sean Bean is always a treat.

"Set timers six minutes."
"Six minutes. Check."

It's great to see two 00s working in sync, as Bond sets the explosives and Trevelyan disarms the guards and tosses Bond a rifle.

Bond explodes into action to escape the gas room, it's really exciting stuff.

Was there any more spectacular way to go into the credits than with Bond jumping off a cliff after a plane, and the buzz of the plane's engine? What a thrilling final sound to take you into the title theme. This is really well put together, professional, top notch stuff.

I LOVE the title sequence, it's one of the best, starting inside a gun barrel, with the gun pointed at you, and you get the explosion and the bullet flying at your face. With the fall of the Soviet Union, they show us falling sickles, hammers, red stars, etc. They're going further with the (obvious) symbolism, and it's very effective, it actually communicates a lot about this new world we're in. The two headed woman (Janus) with the gun out of the mouth cracks me up, it's so Bond title sequence.

And I haven't even mentioned the song. It's great, Tina Turner is in full Tina Turner mode, worthy of Bassey. It even manages to use the "Golden" title again without being total nonsense, it tells a coherent story that fits Bond very well. It also has a great build up that has always stuck with me. And what you see on screen actually matches up with the lyrics!

Okay, this is a master version of the title sequence. Someone studied them and knows their stuff. The guns, the symbols, the writhing women, it's perfect. It's by far the best, most advanced title sequence in the series up to this point, it's a huge leap forward.

After the great title sequence, we immediately jump to a speeding DB5. Famke Janssen (lord) shows up in a sweet red Ferrari. Now this is podracing Bond! The stunt driving, the camera shots, it's perfect.

"I have no problem with female authority"
"I like a woman who enjoys pulling rank"

We see them setting up this new world where women are rapidly becoming equals, with the new M a woman.

"I trust you'll stay...onatop of things?" Moneypenny gets in a funny.

Famke Janssen is a crazy sadomasochistic sex killer, and it's just ridiculously over the top and out there...but it's...interesting that they choose this kind of female villain to go along with the feminism...with Xenia orgasming as her victim dies. Even with something as silly as this, I think there's more depth to it than other Bond films. It even takes the "kills with her thighs" idea that much further. Not only does she kill, she has an orgasm while she does it. Famke brings a lot of joy and enthusiasm to a ridiculous role.

Bond beats a guy up with a towel in a sort of Bourne style.

Again that hint of feminism and women in the (nerdy) workplace with Natalya having to deal with Boris' creepy porn cartoons and sex pun passwords. Men are such sex people, amirite? "He wouldn't know a woman if one came up and sat on his head." Alan Cumming is kinda hilarious, I like him in the role (this is the only movie I like him in). I AM INVEENCEBULL. Nerd. It's interesting that they gave Natalya a sense of humor about it.

Moneypenny is introduced in a black dress. She had a date. Not pining around for James anymore. Or is she? "You know this sort of behavior could qualify as sexual harassment". There's that equality and changing world again. They actually have a point to make instead of just pointless goofing around.

M is the "evil queen of numbers". M represents the new age of numbers and computers, while Bond is from the old world of (men) hunches and gut instinct. Again, they actually have a point to make instead of just screwing around.

Natalya is a pretty strong Bond girl. She starts as an innocent civilian, transitions to action survivor and hardens throughout the film. She has no time for tears, letting out a few when she couldn't escape the Severnaya base, before shutting them down and getting back to surviving. She doesn't just break down and sit there and sob, she pulls herself out of the fire. It helps that she doesn't "run like a girl". Throughout the movie she makes use of her knowledge and gives the fighting her best effort. She's suited up in pseudo-military gear for the finale. Fitting for this feminist entry. Bond gives her, and several other women, several "yes, sir" responses throughout the movie.

"I think you're a sexist, misogynist dinosaur..." Well, don't mince words. Dench makes a solid M, though I must confess I've always found M to be irrelevant to the franchise.

Can't say I care for the BMW Z3. The pen grenade is fun, though.

"Don't touch that! That's my lunch." Ha. Nice fake out.

Felix has been replaced by Whitaker from The Living Daylights. Maybe Felix is still bitten in half.

Hilariously, Valentin's mistress "strangling a cat" in the background of his club, is played by Minnie Driver.

The meeting with Trevelyan in the graveyard is classic. Sets are great throughout the movie.

The action is fast, leading from one piece to another. The tank chase is pretty crazy, crashing through buildings. Saved the James Bond theme for the perfect time, because this is just outrageous. Bond's head sticking out of the tank is hilarious.

Trevelyan gets all molesty with Natalya, forcing his tongue in her mouth like so many of these recent stories. Add him to the IMDB of pervs.

It's slows down a bit when they give time for Natalya and Bond to hook up in the Caribbean, and it's really not a good pause, full of the worst cliche dialogue and forced drama. The one flawed period in the movie, but it's short and doesn't matter at all.

Xenia dropping in while Bond was still in a dream state was a really nice shot.

Hiding the villain base in a lake was an inspired idea, right up there with YOLT's secret volcano lair. Again, I feel like this is a master Bond movie, with the best of all the tropes.

Bond tells Natalya not to move once they get inside the base, but she's not the type to sit things out. She gets moving with a plan of her own.

Bond nonchalantly twitching away from the bullets flying around his head is perfect. He's still a mostly serious Bond here.

Apparently no one notices, or smells, the huge pool of leaking gasoline dripping down from one floor to another.

"She's a moron. A second level programmer". Natalya outwits the INVEENCIBULL boy nerd Boris with just a little trick to **** things up. Again, this level of competence is very believable, very balanced, and doesn't tread into the fanboys sexists' dreaded Rey Mary Sue level.

"Go ahead, shoot him. He means nothing to me." Turnabout is equal play. Apparently she knows how to use a gun, too.

The Bond-Trevelyan face off has an incredible kinetic energy to it. It's a great brawl between evenly matched 00s. Trevelyan gets a heavy and brutal death suitable for a great Bond villain. LOL they drop a giant antenna dish on him.

Boris' I AM INVEENCIBLE death is a hilarious camp throwback to Moore. Nerd.

Ends with a fun recurring joke about Bond and vehicles blowing up, with a big, toothy Brosnan grin.


A masterful blend of the best that came before it, it is the perfect Bond movie. Brosnan is a pleasurable mix between Connery and Moore, with the best of both, and none of Moore's weakness here. The action is spectacular, the women stake their claim to the franchise, the villains are outstanding, the music is spare and shows up at the right time, the title sequence is the best yet.

Rankings

Goldeneye
On Her Majesty's Secret Service
FRWL
Goldfinger
Licence to Kill
The Living Daylights
Dr. No
TMWTGG
The Spy Who Loved Me
Live and Let Die
Never Say Never Again
Octopussy
For Your Eyes Only
Moonraker
Thunderball
You Only Live Twice
Diamonds Are Forever

Boom.
Sorry for the length.

 

Eat That Question: Frank Zappa in His Own Words (2016) – Thorsten Schutte

How does Frank Zappa want to be remembered?

Uh . . . it’s not important.

Want to be remembered for the music?

It’s not important . . . the people who worry about being remembered are guys like Reagan, Bush. These people want to be remembered . . .

And Frank Zappa?

I don’t care.

This documentary seeks to delve into the world of Frank Zappa using all archival footage of interviews and concerts. Unfortunately, it comes across as pretty shallow and not all that interesting. I don’t know who it’s for. I don’t think it’s a good intro to Zappa. It focuses on a lot of late Zappa music, kind of on the classical side of his composition, not his best stuff in my opinion at all. But it’s also not really for people who are already fans. To me, it seems to not even come close to doing justice to the complexity of the man and I’ve heard less than a quarter of his discography; the Zappa completest will doubtless be insulted by the film. This isn’t to say that it doesn’t have pleasures. The interviews are fine, if not particularly engaging. The film has two really great bits, one from the very beginning of Zappa’s career, the other from the very end. There’s a wonderful film of him on the Steve Allen Show three years before Freak Out was released, performing an improvised piece on two bicycles. It’s warm and witty and compelling. The other is an interview from 1993, the year Zappa died, with the Today Show and it’s deeply emotional and beautiful. Zappa was, I think, often kind of opaque in interviews; he himself called the entire process of interviewing someone ridiculous. Like Dylan, you could never be quite sure when he was being entirely candid and when he was having you on. In this Today Show interview, I think you see Zappa at his most honest and least pretentious; he’s as vulnerable and real as he could ever be in that interview, I think, and it’s a heartbreaker. You can find both of those sequences online, I reckon, and watch them in their entirety, not chopped up as in the movie and skip a solid hour and ten of mostly uninteresting footage. Maybe it was just a bad idea from the get-go; an artist like Zappa could never be summed up in ninety minutes, not even by himself. 2 stars

tl;dr – unfocused documentary features a small amount of great footage, but is mostly forgettable and superficial, failing to do Zappa anything near justice; sum up Zappa in ninety minutes? Nope. 2 stars.

 

Justice League. The villain is weak and there's an overreliance on special effects, but overall I really enjoyed it.

 

Justice League


In a word: mediocre

I saw Justice League for the second time the other day and I didn't leave the theater disappointed like I did previously.

Justice League, like Suicide Squad, has a basic plot of rounding up a team to fight a big bad guy. The script is pretty flat as it's predictable as there are no twists or revelations. Moreover, the ending of the final battle with Steppenwolf is very underwhelming and unsatisfying. The pace and story telling is a bit choppy as the film provides several scenes for character back stories/exposition. The dialogue gets clunky at times with things like "You smell good." The CGI reminds me of the CGI in the Star Wars prequels in that alot of the scenery in the film looks like it's against a green screen. The Justice League iteration of Batman is more Bruce Wayne than Batman, which reminded me of George Clooney's incarnation of the character. I mean, there's a scene where Alfred ask Bruce if he wants to send Diana a note because Bruce is too shy to communicate with her.

Saving grace for this film by fanboys is the seeing these (mostly) A-List characters in action.

In short, A-List characters in action with a "C-" plot and script set against a "D+" CGI.

 

Tomorrow Never Dies - this was sad.

There are some neat graphics in the title sequences, but most of them have nothing to do with this movie. They come off as a tech demo, just showing off. They've taken the tech advance, the CGI, and gone overboard with it with no real direction.

I want to like what Sheryl Crow is doing, she gives it this breathy gasping that is supposed to be seductive...but she just can't pull it off. She doesn't have it. "It's so deadly my dear" is about the only part that works.

The plot seems pertinent, with Hong Kong official going back to China not long before this movie was released, our current tension in the South China Seas, the concerns with our media and supposedly fake news. Too bad it was torpedoed by garbage character work.

Bond goes over the line with the corny jokes into Moore territory, and he goes further Rambo. Michelle Yeoh has the degrading task of adding kung fu noises to every little action, including firing a gun at an engineering console. Hyah!

I just don't go for Jonathan Pryce and his ham. It's just ridiculous and he peddles the cheapest conspiracy bait. He's a cartoon, a bad one. Like Cobra Commander, but without the cool visual. I usually like Pryce, but not here. I don't go for Bond and Teri Hatcher, either. It's terrible.

The doctor and Stamper are really terrible B-movie garbage. Some really low quality work here. Vincent Schiavelli gives the doctor this ridiculous German accent, and seemingly ends practically every line with "ja?"

About the only thing I liked about this movie is the car, the BMW 750. Is it the first four door/sedan Bond car? Doesn't seem right, but it's a beautiful car. I love it. It is the epitome of BMW to me. And the remote control was a neat trick and it really works well in the movie, as do the rest of the gadgetry.

The title sequence is terrible, Bond has regressed back into Moore territory, I was embarrassed for Yeoh, and the villains are awful. What a huge drop in quality.

I only scored it higher than YOLT because of YOLT's technical flaws.

Rankings

Goldeneye
On Her Majesty's Secret Service
FRWL
Goldfinger
Licence to Kill
The Living Daylights
Dr. No
TMWTGG
The Spy Who Loved Me
Live and Let Die
Never Say Never Again
Octopussy
For Your Eyes Only
Moonraker
Thunderball
Tomorrow Never Dies
You Only Live Twice
Diamonds Are Forever