Saga When The Hunter Becomes The Hunted (Obi, Asajj) Thanks to readers!

JediMindTrick000: You write a great Obi-Wan, and I love where this is going.
Your comments just absolutely made my day! Thank you!

KELIA: Of course she's hiding something! It couldn't be that easy, now could it? And as far as what she's hiding, I know and you'll just have to wait to find out!

 

Even though I get the honor of reading the chapters before they're posted, I am always amazed by your attention to detail and ability to craft such organic scenes. I also like the way that you are handling Ventress. She's a viper, however you are showing glimpses of her humanity that really contribute to the development of her character. You do her justice, Evil Padawan.

It had been many years since Asajj had even offered use of her first name and now she had to process the swirl of emotions Obi-Wan?s relatively easy acceptance had stirred up inside her. She now knew that while he did not yet trust her, he at least did not see her as some avenging animal unworthy of basic respect.

Beautiful!

 

Sacrificing some of her mental shielding over her emotions she pulled all of the energy she could toward a few thoughts blocked off in a corner of her mind. She locked down the information as tightly as she was able before miring it in as much of a fog as possible. Kenobi was one of the most powerful Force users she?d ever met. She feebly hoped that he would not be able to even detect the existence of this small deception.

Hmmmm... What is she hiding?

This is a most interesting story!

That poor pilot.. I know that those three hooded figures are after AV, and also Obi-Wan...

Can't wait to see what happens when they meet!

 

This is wonderful!

You do such a wonderful job with Ventress... she is dark, and does have a hidden motive I am sure, but at the same time I really think she wants to do what is right.

Amazing!

I am so happy Star_Drifter told me about this!

Could you please PM when you update? Thank you!

Ani-maniac

 

oqidaun: Thank you, my Evil Master of Doom. I could not do this without your help!

Star_Drifter: So glad you liked it and I'm honored you passed it on.

Ani-maniac: Thank you so much! I'll add you to the list!

 

I'm sending the world's largest collection of shrunken heads to my Evil Master for her absolutely amazing job helping me put this chapter together! Thanks so much, oqi, for not giving up on your Evil Padawan of Doom!
Enjoy!



Discarded washers, spilt fuel and dead acid rats littered the floor of Pentari, Folcamina's smaller spaceport. A decaying pile of vermin, ignored by the cleaning droids exuded a foul stench along the wall of the hangar. Meticulously, a pair of pale hands reached into the mass of rotting flesh and retrieved a small, metallic object. Bringing the object to his face, the man with the ashy hands sniffed and then discarded it back into the pile of furry bodies, dissatisfied that it did not contain the elusive quality he sought.

His two companions moved similarly along the opposing wall of the large space. The fine fabric of the hems on their dark robes collected bits of fur, grease and dust from the corners they tread so determinedly and the mixture of odors permeated the air around them as they worked. Dismissing the stares of passersby, the cloaked figures moved from hangar to hangar repeating their arcane survey.

After quite a few hangars had been through a thorough, if unorthodox, search, a small contingent of the Emperor?s fully armed Stormtroopers approached the trio from the far side of the cavernous space. Being assigned to the outer reaches of the Empire?s control allowed many men an excuse for lax standards. Some mismatched armor and a formation that was less than standard were hallmarks of these squads. Still, they gave their best attempt at a menacing presence as they approached.

?You three, hold there.? A voice commanded in a distorted and static-filled, monotone.

The hooded men stopped their task and rose with fluid grace away from the object they had been crouched around, testing it with all of their available senses. They patiently waited in silence for the cadre of troopers to catch up with them.

?We?ve been told someone?s poking around the hangar bays. Let?s see some credentials. What?s your business here?? The commanding officer, a lieutenant, barked orders at them. He glanced down at the pile that had been the threesome?s subject of investigation upon his arrival. Relieved his features were hidden behind his helmet, he crinkled his nose in revulsion when he realized they had been picking apart a small feline corpse as if reading its entrails for portents.

?Not to worry, my good man,? the central figure purred. ?We all work toward the same goal. Surely, my brothers, we should acquiesce to his most reasonable of requests and give him our identification??

The speaker reached up swiftly with thin, sallow hands and pulled back his hood, his reticent fellows following suit behind him. The troopers raised their blasters at them in reaction to the unexpected move and then dropped their arms and involuntarily took a step back with the revelation of the faces beneath the fabric, wishing their lieutenant had not asked for identification.

Pale, waxy skin stretched across a conglomeration of features at odds with what nature intended for a human being. Each jaw line was enflamed with vicious, angry burns set deep into the skin and upon each of their heads not a single hair had root.

The lieutenant stood dumbstruck for a long moment before nodding in deference. It took another moment for him to gather his courage to speak, all the while the trio stood taciturn, unmoved by the reaction their features had caused in the normally stalwart warriors.

?Forgive me, my lords. We didn?t know the Inquisitorium had business here.? He hesitated, his tongue a dead weight in his mouth, before continuing. He knew what he had to say, but had no desire to make the offer. ?Let us know if we can be any help to your investigations.? The voice sounded a bit less authoritative when faced with the three monstrosities before him, knowing he must defer to any of their needs.

?We have but one simple request of you, most loyal lieutenant. All we require is the hangar

 

Great story! You do such a wonderful job of setting the scene, and I'm enjoying the conflict Ventress is experience about having to submit herself to Obi-Wan's direction for awhile, not to mention some secret feeling if I'm not mistaken.

I also think it's great how you've tied in some of your other stories. You're creating your very own universe.

 

Great job

Discarded washers, spilt fuel and dead acid rats littered the floor of Pentari, Folcamina's smaller spaceport. A decaying pile of vermin, ignored by the cleaning droids exuded a foul stench along the wall of the hangar. Meticulously, a pair of pale hands reached into the mass of rotting flesh and retrieved a small, metallic object. Bringing the object to his face, the man with the ashy hands sniffed and then discarded it back into the pile of furry bodies, dissatisfied that it did not contain the elusive quality he sought.

What a picture Master...oqi must be very proud

Interesting twist...so you weren't kidding about introducing some nice lil powder puffs of OCs Seriously, though, very intriguing characters, and once again you've thrown my infamous curiosity into overload! I don't what I want any more- more Obi/Venti, more on your new OCs (I love the way your OCs fit in so well!) or to know what they're looking for, oh, so many questions, and still a week before any of them get answered!

 

Oooh, nifty update, J_L! The baddies are getting closer and I'm getting more and more worried. *has gone through several bowls of popcorn already* Keep the lovely updates coming, ma dear, you certainly have me hooked!

Stormqueen

 

Wow!
Can I say ... great work though. The details are a bit squeamish for me...I could really picture it all in my head (good job I'm not eating!) I'm a bit worried about what this means for Obi and Asajj though ...

 

Whoa - nice job with the imagery. It sent chills down my spine...

 

Alright, I have to say I am a Sith, but about the Inquisitorium... *shivers*

I mean, um... ahem.



Wonderful update! I really enjoyed it, and look forward to seeing where you take it.

And thank you so much for the PM.

Ani-maniac

 

Very creepy and chilling! I felt like I was seeing things from the perspective of one of those poor stormtroopers.

 

Pale, waxy skin stretched across a conglomeration of features at odds with what nature intended for a human being. Each jaw line was enflamed with vicious, angry burns set deep into the skin and upon each of their heads not a single hair had root.

The Inquisitors certainly are a creepy bunch!

Very interesting update!

 

I agree about the baddies! Interesting look into their thoughts and such!

 

Yeehaw! It's reader reply time at the old corral! *thinks to self "I am such a dork!"*

DarthMousche: So glad you're enjoying this! Yes, I'm kind of building my own little independent storyline while still trying to stay in canon. George left us so many wonderful, decades long holes to fill!

Stella_Ripple: Thank you Padawan! Yes, I think I made oqi quite happy with the descriptions. Grossed me out to write them, but they were fun.

stormqueen874: *passes SQ a big glass of soda to wash down all the popcorn* Glad I've got ya!

Kestrel_Kenobi: Yes, I've infiltrated your brain with my imagery! I have achieved my goal! Thanks Padawan!

KELIA: *hands KELIA a coat for chills* Thanks and thank you for reading!

Ani-maniac: I made a Sith shiver in fear? Yes! Thanks for reading!

Lovely-in-Orange: Thank you for reading! Hey, at least those stormtroopers have something to tell their buddies tonight.

Star_Drifter: So glad you liked it! Believe me, they're even creepier in my head.

Kynstar: They will be returning, have no fear. Thanks for reading!

 

I feel transported to another world everytime I step into, I mean READ, this story. I am very curious about the secret locked away in Asajj's troubled mind. And those Inquistor's??? They are scary guys.

 

Z: Thanks! So glad I could whisk you away to my little corner of the GFFA!

And now for the next chapter!


Continuing as it had for millennia, Tatooine?s twin suns beat mercilessly down into a steep canyon of red rock. Boulders were strewn across its base, long abandoned by the rivers that once flowed there. Amongst the forgotten monuments to fertile times, long blades of light flashed and sparked ferociously against each other in a deadly dance of power. Two figures wielded the plasma weapons, sweat pouring down their backs, soaking the light tunics they wore until they clung to the skin.

With a movement faster than the eye could follow, one combatant spun with the fluidity of a dancer as he blocked a swing aimed at his chest with one blade, bringing a second blade around to block a cut aimed at his legs. He took half a step backward before calling on the Force to aid his leap over his opponent?s head, landing some distance away on a high rock attached to the canyon wall. His adversary pursued relentlessly and moved quickly, jumping to land on a similar berm within reach of his sabers.

Though easily thwarted, the slim figure plied her green and purple blades in an attempt to remove first his hand, then his head as she moved in close, stepping onto the narrow ledge along side him. A loud cracking sound shot through the canyon as the stone crumbled under their feet. The adversaries leapt apart as their footholds disappeared and they skillfully landed a short distance from each other on the ground below. Recovering quickly and hoping to catch him off guard, Ventress suddenly flew at Kenobi in a new flurry of strikes and thrusts.

Obi-Wan surprised himself by finding a subtle new sense of balance using two blades, a style most unfamiliar to him. Though he still preferred the easy agility a single blade provided, over the past month he had learned of the defensive advantages two lightsabers provided. His ability to constantly block and parry her every strike frustrated Asajj greatly and he could sense it through the thick air.

He gave her a taunting grin. ?If you stay on the attack, there is naught for me to do but defend, Asajj. Something I?ve already proven to you I can do for quite some time.?

She growled in her throat and pushed out at him with the Force in a frustrated blow that took him off guard. He stumbled and regained his balance just in time to block the fresh rain of blows she brought down upon him.

?You lose patience too easily, Asajj.? He told her as he finally found the hole he was waiting for.

Coming in close to her body, he spun, countering her movements, and landed a killing blow. Asajj yelped in ill-tempered pain, thankful that the sabers had been set on a training level as she involuntarily grabbed the burn on her neck. The pain of this wound would pass in time. The greater injury, the one no amount of bacta could heal, was to her pride. Powering down their sabers, they bowed to each other, formally ending the session.

?You are getting better, Asajj.? He complimented her as he clipped his sabers to his belt. ?But you need accept that the Force will guide your actions, not the other way round. You try to make it do things as you think they should be done. Manipulation of the Force in such a way will not get you where you wish to go.?

Besides being tired and angry at both herself and her new mentor, Asajj?s mind was too scorched by the unrelenting heat to accept Ben?s lecturing gracefully.

?Is that what you taught Skywalker?? she snapped at him with her eyes flashing. He may have ended the duel, but she would deal the final blow. ?Look where it got him. Your fallen angel now hunts our kind like animals.? She laughed. ?Yes, I know it?s him under that mask. One does not battle Anakin Skywalker and forget that presence easily.?

Ben said nothing but simply put out his open hand to her, his face a stoic mask. She slapped the two hilts she had been using into his palm and turned away. He caressed his hand over them, attempting to cleanse Asajj?s presence from the surface

 

What a post Master! For a while there, I'd completely forgotten it was (if it can ever be termed that) just a piece of text- I love the way your story flows so seamlessly!
And Asaji's emotions were so convincing, frustrations and petty bitterness to reluctant understanding... perfect!
Obi Wan seems to become very wise, I can really see Old Ben appearing- can't wait to see more of them!

 

I'm so enjoying this tale...What a beautiful and powerful piece of writing - I was there with them.



I can't wait for more and I kept my tea down this time !

 

Wow, this post was just amazing! You have a wonderful style of writing and I really enjoy it. You capture Ventress and Obi-Wan so well.

And this line:

?Is that what you taught Skywalker?? she snapped at him with her eyes flashing. He may have ended the duel, but she would deal the final blow. ?Look where it got him. Your fallen angel now hunts our kind like animals.? She laughed. ?Yes, I know it?s him under that mask. One does not battle Anakin Skywalker and forget that presence easily.?

It so perfectly shows that Ventress still has a great deal to do to overcome her inner darkess. And poor Obi-Wan to have to live with that guilt..

Incredible work!

Thank you so much for the PM, I can't wait for the next part!

Ani-maniac

 

What a great update!

I liked how Obi-Wan explained his own brush with the dark side to help Asajj, especially after her taunts about Anakin. BTW, are you at liberty to say if Vader is going to be make an appearence in the future?

Bravo!

 

?You said there would be no more lessons for today, Ben.?

?This was not a lesson, Asajj, though if you choose to learn something from it, then may the Force will it so.? Ben stood to begin the journey home, leaving her to her thoughts.


Wonderful visuals, as always, and I loved this piece of dialogue especially!

I also thought the idea of Ben trying to "cleanse" Asajj from his blades was ...perceptive. Certainly, that automatic OCD rubbing of an item you've been handed is something I suffer from, anyway.

 

?You look like General Grievous, you know, with your collection of fallen Jedi lightsabers.? Alas, poor Grievous... Err, I mean poor fallen Jedi.

I love her taunts and that they really don't get her the results she wants. I really liked how you used setting in the fight scene too.

 

?I was knighted the very next day and took Anakin as my Padawan immediately. Things moved very quickly for a little while, but as soon as I was able to get Anakin settled at the Temple I took some time to heal. My little brush with the Dark side took weeks of training and meditation to overcome, but I did do it. That, Asajj, is why I push you so hard. I sense your confusion, I understand what the Dark side has done to you, but I also know that you can overcome that.?

Asajj is plunging her verbal knife into Obi-Wan about Anakin, and rather than seek revenge, he once again tries to help her!

Great update!

More, please!