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  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Saga Ring of Fire - The Final Story in Anakin's Saga - Author's final replies and goodbyes 2/23

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by geo3, Jan 18, 2005.

  1. MoAngel

    MoAngel Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Jul 13, 2005
    Oh so very intense. Did Var just become one with the force? Darn, another month I must wait for the outcome, especially Anakin's duel and Padme's fate.

    Mo
     
  2. Darth_Null

    Darth_Null Jedi Youngling

    Registered:
    Aug 5, 2003
    I really like the way the tension is built in this post. V'ar's sacrifice, her thought process, feeling the darkness - all of it - made me feel as if I were there. Nothing like giving a life to preserve the chosen one's progeny . . . Speaking of which, do you think he will be upset? I can't wait to see how he channels his anger and takes his rightful place. . .


     
  3. DarthBreezy

    DarthBreezy Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Jun 4, 2002
    And another grand OC is lost to us... How sad, I was hoping that our V'ar would live to become one of the grand storytellers... :(


    Note that Eldritch has joined the ranks of OC-dom (but I maintain that it's still cooler to be an R2 unit than a human :p )

    Lovely chapter my freind - I know how hard you have been working on this and I tell you, it's paying off in Spades...
     
  4. Jazz_Skywalker

    Jazz_Skywalker Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Aug 3, 2002
    V'ar! Oh, I was hoping it wouldn't come to this, but I'm glad that she died doing what she loved, with the feeling of her fellow Jedi and the Light around her.

    But still....

    jazz
     
  5. stacysatrip

    stacysatrip Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 20, 2002
    I have no words right now....beautiful, brilliant and gripping. That's about all I can manage.

    What a twist! I suppose I should have seen it coming. V'ar is the embodiment of a Jedi. They could probably all learn something from her. RIP, girl. You are a true hero.
     
  6. ELDRITCH

    ELDRITCH Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Aug 27, 1998
    Ring of Fire

    Synopsis: A story about the waning days of the Clone Wars, in which a lowly weapons officer becomes the most powerful man in the galaxy, even mightier than Emperor Chewbacca, replete with devoted harems on every planet.

    (and some small b plot about some chosen one and his high maintenance children)
     
  7. geo3

    geo3 Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 29, 2002
    [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh]

    Oh --- and our protagonist is the XO, soon to be Captain, of the Intrepid, I'll have you know!

    That doesn't interfere with the harems and stuff, though. ;)
     
  8. satanat_solo

    satanat_solo Jedi Master star 1

    Registered:
    Sep 12, 2005
    "Please, Obi-Wan. Please make this work. Please don?t let us fail.
    There was an enormous flash of light so bright she felt it sear into her eyes, blinding her. It didn?t matter.

    It was as it should be.

    May the Force be with you, Obi-Wan ?

    *

    A small signal light flashed.

    Obi-Wan gave the order that would haunt him for the rest of his life. ?Now!?

    Bren Eldritch hit the fire button as though his life depended on it.

    On the Intrepid?s scanner screen, a small flash perilously near the Victorious lit up briefly, then died away.

    May the Force be with you, V?ar whispered into Obi-Wan?s ear. He trembled.
    "

    :_| ooh!! that's so beautiful!.. but so sad...

    Poor, poor, miserable obi-wan.
    Yet another thing that's going to haunt him for the rest of his life...

    I've grown attached to V'ar during this fic.. please let her be alive... [face_praying]

    *sighs* unlikely i suppose... i just hope you've got a nice big bag of 'happy' hidden somewhere in the coming chapters for obi-wan? no sad hermitage?

    Anyway!
    Thanks for the pm, a lovely, if depressing, chapter.=D=
    i eagerly await some dooku/ani/palpy action! (...well that sounded wrongo_O )
     
  9. ELDRITCH

    ELDRITCH Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Aug 27, 1998
    Yep, you're right. I got a tad confused. Cool! Even better.


    I'm glad people here realize the amount of effort and care you put into this story that they enjoy. Perhaps they don't totally, but I'm glad they appreciate it. And as others have already attested, you wrote V'ar's final moments beautifully and strong. Very fitting.
     
  10. JediMasterRev

    JediMasterRev Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Dec 2, 2004
    Oh wow..

    That was simply brilliant. I could almost hear the building of the music as V'ar went off to complete her task. How very sad, but extremely noble. I have enjoyed your OC V'ar since the very beginning as she always seemed like the true embodiment of what the Jedi were supposed to stand for. In this masterfully written post, you have reaffirmed those feelings even more so.

    The action sequences were also very nicely done. Like your other readers, I too found myself sitting at the edge of my seat in eager anticipation of what would happen next. I especially loved the interplay of tactics between Obi-Wan and his officers, as well as the strategy he used against Tarkin. Very riveting moment.

    Hopefully now that our heroes are away, it is time for the confrontation that will decide everything. I definitely cannot wait to read the next update. It should be an intense one. Excellent work, my friend.
     
  11. dietcokeani

    dietcokeani Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Jun 1, 2005
    Well that was certainly worth the wait!

    That was a very creative way to handle such a sticky problem. I wonder if coming up with a solution is easier when you've defined the problem? Somehow I don't think so in this story.

    I'm sad to see V'ar go into the light...but maybe she'll be right back with us soon along side the other Jedi who are lending support to this confrontation.

    Obi-Wan walking away from the military: Woo-Hoo! I never did like the mix of Jedi in the military. I can't wait to see where he shows up next. :):) Maybe he and Anakin can face Palpy?


    BTW..thanks for all the funny lines on the Palpy's To Do List game.=D= That was fun.

    PS
    Eldrich went from Beta to weapons man to Captain so quickly....how long till he becomes the InterGalactic Grand PooBah?:confused:
     
  12. rocketscientist

    rocketscientist Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Nov 16, 2005
    [face_hypnotized] I didn't see that coming...

    Somehow I thought she'd be the last one left standing. But of course I should have known. I know the light will shine very brightly for her.

    This must have been very hard for you to write.


    [image=http://i119.photobucket.com/albums/o129/r0ck3tsci3ntist/s640x480.jpg]

    Rest In Peace

    @};-



    edit - on an up note - it was a beautifully written chapter that leaves me dying to know what happens next! (sorry - took me a moment to get over V'ar)
     
  13. qingauk

    qingauk Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 12, 2002
    WOWEE.. what an incredible idea! YOU are amazing! So Padme escapes and then back to Anakin's defeat of Dooku and the ship gets destroyed and Anakin finds Padme and babies are born and I love happy endings!! Oops ..sorry.. waiting for your next fabuloso post..[face_dancing]
     
  14. FitJedi

    FitJedi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 14, 2006
    Absolutely amazing post yet again geo3, so much exciting between Obi-wan and his crew, V'ar and now Padme in the early stages of labor. Things are most definitely going to get a little hairy I have a feeling. I do hope everyone makes it out of there alright.
     
  15. Luna_Nightshade

    Luna_Nightshade Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Jan 25, 2006
    That was absolutely incredible.

    V'ar... :_|

    You have an incredible gift for writing the intricacies of space flight and machinery. The little nitty gritty pieces of a ship all come to life here. It is really quite amazing how I'm able to visualize that stuff through your writing when otherwise it goes way over my head.

    V'ar... her sacrifice was quite fitting and quite painful. It was absolutely perfect, yet still... *sigh* I too hoped there would be a happy safe place for V'ar to go after this, but she is a Jedi after all, and they don't have a great track record for peaceful endings.

    Much =D=, geo3. This was quite amazing. I'm so glad you were able to make it through DWB and so splendidly. Can't wait for more!
     
  16. geo_gnosis

    geo_gnosis Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Mar 4, 2006
    Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.
    And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears...


    That's from Gibran's The Prophet, of course, not from this chapter, but honestly, it's how I often feel when reading this story! You made a tragic event a thing of beauty. I loved the character of V'ar and am sorry to see her go, but what a fitting end for one so noble---to exit this life while serving the Light...while being the Light. @};-

    Most of all, I really felt for Obi-Wan. With just a few select words, you managed to convey the depths of his feelings and make my heart ache for him. An awful lot has been placed upon his shoulders. Poor Obi-Wan. :(

    "Children?" Dormé whispered, to no one in particular.

    I liked that little touch, thrown in amidst the panic and fear and heroism. If no one knew that there are twins, perhaps some (pleasant) surprises are in store for some people. ;) I'm not at all surprised that V'ar would know. :)

    Every keystroke of your hard work is greatly appreciated and eagerly lapped up, geo3! I'll be excited to see the next one, but will wait patiently for it. :)
     
  17. Lando_Plenty

    Lando_Plenty Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Aug 13, 2002
    Wow...I'm depressed. :(
    Not too many words come to mind now, so forgive the short post. I'll just say:

    V'ar was one of those special characters - she reminded me of Qui-gon. A genuinely good, truly likeable character that felt like so much more than just a character... You made her so alive. :(
     
  18. geo3

    geo3 Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 29, 2002
    Tough post, great, great readers... thanks to all of you for your supportive and understanding responses! I have a whole slew of replies here, followed by a bit of good news at the end of this post...


    Darth Target absolutely, captivatingly brilliant

    Thank you, and welcome to the thread! It?s great to know that you are reading and enjoying the story.

    VA_Parky Oh no! V'ar! *sniffle* I am so bummed, but wow... what a beautiful sacrifice... I was on the edge of my seat throughout this entire chapter. The way you described V'ar's state of mine was gorgeous. As sad as the end result was, I did find comfort in the fact that she was surrounded by the light of her fellow Jedi.

    Thanks so much! I?m glad you found comfort in that light. I know I did.

    This story is utterly captivating. I love the way you write these characters. It's so clear that you know them very well, both inside and out. They always come across even more 'real' than they did on the movie screen.

    Thank you! I admit to sometimes feeling by this point that they are quite real. sometimes I almost expect to see them on the street! I wouldn't be at all surprised if one or the other walked through my door to complain or to make demands ? :p

    Speaking of movie screens, is there any way we could turn this story into the real thing? Do we happen to have any millionaires out there? *looks hopeful*

    Oh, wouldn?t that be something? What a dream! I?d love it.

    Congrats on another out-of-this-world chapter, my friend. I'm in awe, as always!

    Thank you! [face_blush]

    MoAngel Oh so very intense. Did V?ar just become one with the force?
    Quite possibly O:)

    Darn, another month I must wait for the outcome, especially Anakin's duel and Padmé?s fate.

    Aha! You might be surprised! :D

    Darth_Null I really like the way the tension is built in this post. V'ar's sacrifice, her thought process, feeling the darkness - all of it - made me feel as if I were there.

    I?m very glad! Thank you!

    Nothing like giving a life to preserve the chosen one's progeny . . .

    Well, ELDRITCH?S contention that their story is a minor plot with minor characters notwithstanding [face_laugh], there does seem to be quite a lot riding on these children?s lives?

    Speaking of which, do you think he will be upset?

    Er? possibly! :p

    I can't wait to see how he channels his anger and takes his rightful place. . .

    Rightful place? [face_whistling]

    DarthBreezy And another grand OC is lost to us... How sad, I was hoping that our V'ar would live to become one of the grand storytellers...
    She should have, by all rights. I like to think that she would have ranked among the greatest of Jedi, in time. But these are dark times in the GFFA ? very dark. :(

    Note that Eldritch has joined the ranks of OC-dom (but I maintain that it's still cooler to be an R2 unit than a human)

    :D I do rather enjoy your gee3 ;)

    Lovely chapter my friend- I know how hard you have been working on this and I tell you, it's paying off in Spades...

    Thanks! [face_smile]

    Jazz_Skywalker V'ar! Oh, I was hoping it wouldn't come to this, but I'm glad that she died doing what she loved, with the feeling of her fellow Jedi and the Light around her. But still....

    I know. It wasn?t any easier for me? :_|

    stacysatrip I have no words right now....beautiful, brilliant and gripping. That's about all I can manage.

    Thank you! [:D]

    What a twist! I suppose I should have seen it coming. V'ar is the embodiment of a Jedi. They could probably all learn something from her. RIP, girl. You are a true hero.

    It sure doesn?t seem to be a good time in the GFFA to be a Jedi?

    satanat_solo ooh!! that's so beautiful!.. but so sad...

    Thanks!

    Poor, poor, miserable obi-wan. Yet another thing that's going
     
  19. GunraysLawyer

    GunraysLawyer Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 23, 2003
    Well, I'm only a week late....


    Not much to add, other than V'ar seems to have been written to be sacrificed. Don't take that the wrong way, it's not telegraphed, but looking back, with knowledge of how it ends, it makes much sense.

    Now, back to work, and perhaps later today back to my own writting.
     
  20. geo3

    geo3 Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 29, 2002
    GunraysLawyer Not much to add, other than V'ar seems to have been written to be sacrificed. Don't take that the wrong way, it's not telegraphed, but looking back, with knowledge of how it ends, it makes much sense.

    Ouch! If it's any consolation, she wasn't originally, not at all. But she took her own course, in a way.

    *

    Herewith, surprisingly soon, is the remainder of that pivotal pair of chapters titled "The One Point." There certainly seem to be a lot of singular points in these chapters taken together ... but I guess they all lead to one place ...



    Chapter 39. The One Point II (Part II)


    ?The truth,? Master Yoda had insisted time after time, "is always simple. Only deceit counfounds our understanding."

    After his sudden pure burst of lucidity, Anakin felt strangely removed from the bizarre tableau of which he formed a part. This was odd, considering that the darkest question of his heart ? the identity of his tormentor ? had just been answered.

    Perhaps it was the utter obviousness of the answer that left him feeling almost suspended in time and space, wondering how it was possible that he hadn?t known all along. But even that didn?t seem to matter in the face of the utter simplicity of the truth.

    It is Palpatine. It has always been Palpatine. Since the beginning.


    He felt no fear. After the first shock, he wasn?t even surprised. He was simply relieved? as though a heavy fist that had been crushing him in its grip for so long had opened at last, leaving him feeling light, and ? free.

    He wants me, not Dooku.

    A feeling of power rose up through Anakin like a flame in his veins.

    He needs me.

    Anakin began to pace ? to stalk, actually ? around the empty space. He couldn?t help it. The urge to move, to respond to the sense of burgeoning power, was overwhelming. His path took him in a near circle around the utterly motionless Count Dooku, whom Anakin no longer feared.

    ?He?s yours, isn?t he?? Anakin pointed with the tip of his humming lightsaber at a point somewhere near Dooku?s back. ?He has been, all along.?

    Dooku did not move, but his hatred washed over Anakin like acid. It meant nothing to Anakin. All of his attention was on the other man ? the cloaked Palpatine ? the man who would not, Anakin understood at last, destroy him or allow him to be destroyed, no matter what he said or implied.

    ?Darth Tyrannus is my servant,? the Supreme Chancellor of the Republic?s voice assured him from beneath the dark cloak of a Sith. All laughter had died away.

    The Force gathered around Dooku, dark and dangerous.

    Darth Tyrannus. The Sith name rolled around in Anakin?s mind. Of course.

    Anakin continued to stalk, almost preening. ?If you wanted me to kill him for you, why didn?t you just say so??

    A deep chuckle rolled through the hangar.

    ?Is that what you think I want from you, Anakin??

    ?Among other things.? Anakin?s humming lightsaber twirled lightly in his hand, punctuating his words with its half-light trail and its half-tone song.

    Palpatine remained silent.

    ?What else?? Anakin asked casually, as if it didn?t matter, creating restless whirls of blue light as he paced.

    ?I want you join me. To rule with me.? The pale hands folded serenely into the wide sleeves of the dark robe and disappeared. ?A partnership ? in all things.?

    ?How dare you!? Dooku exploded, his lightsaber flaring into furious life and finding Anakin?s blade before Dooku?s eyes did. The crossed blades whined in rising pitch as the warriors pressed against one another. ?How dare you!? he shouted again, this time at Anakin.

    ?Uh-uh-uh,? Anakin taunted. ?Nice Servant. Obedient Servant. Now, were you told to do that??

    ?You utter fool!? Dooku gritted between his teeth, his face glowing red in the light of his weapon. ?There can be only two. A Master and an Apprentice. That is the way of the Sith.?

    ?Then it looks as though your services are no longer required,? Anakin crooned.

    ?There is no partnership
     
  21. VA_Parky

    VA_Parky Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Aug 10, 2005
    Aughhhhhhhh!! :eek: Evil cliffie alert! [face_skull] Oh my word - I think... I think I need to lay down or something. Whew - that was some intense stuff right there!

    Oh, there was so much to love about this chapter, I don't know where to start. Anakin's teetering between darkness and light was so masterfully done, my emotions were swinging from one side to the other like a great big pendulum. [face_blush] You kept me on pins and needles until the last few sentences... and I'm still nervous about the outcome. Amazing!

    How fitting for V'ar to make an appearance at such a key moment. I loved that Palpatine couldn't see her - that made perfect sense given that he is like, the antithesis to what she is. V'ar has been the heart of the story and even in death, she still has an important part to play. Her final words to Anakin were just beautiful - I had to read them over and over again. They rang with poignancy and were just he reassurance Anakin needed.

    I love this story! You pull me right in and don't let me go. What a neat feeling! It's like the best roller coaster ride in the world but even better because I don't get all dizzy.... hee! :p

    Way to go! =D=

     
  22. rocketscientist

    rocketscientist Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Nov 16, 2005
    SQUEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*&*%%$#*@#$$##!!!!!!!!!!OMGOMGOMG!!!!!!!!!!!!


    [face_skull] @};- [face_skull] @};- [face_skull]


    =D=

    Ok - now I'm giddy... 8-}

    back in a minute


    edit - well geo, it looks like you have succeeded in leaving us all speechless. You should be very proud of yourself:D It is almost impossible to pick something to remark on out of this post. The whole thing is remarkable!

    Anakin's revelation comes through brilliantly! And the action is spellbinding! You struck the perfect balance of action and introspection during the fight. I for one like to see what the combatants are feeling, which you showed us superbly.

    And Palpatine all the while goading! [face_skull] Very nice

    I'm so pleased that you made Palpatine such a force to be reckoned with. He didn't get where he was by being a slouch. I loved the logic you applied to the situation. Of course old Sid would never have confronted Anakin if he thought there was the slightest chance that Anakin could overpower him. You handled that beautifully! He gave Anakin a taste of power and then held back - making him ask for it. That was perfect. The devil can never make you do anything, you have to want to do it. Anakin's motivations were perfect. All powerful poeple want more power- they can't help it! I loved how Sid was so pleased that Anakin wanted that power in order to destroy him - making Anakn the perfect Sith apprentice. [face_awe] Your writing, you logic, your execution - wow. Just - wow.

    And then just when I thought - this is it - this is the fall - V'ar... thank you...

    @};-

    Our Ani's no slouch either, is he?

    ?Never touch me!? the Sith roared.

    Knowing full well that he was milliseconds away from unimaginable pain and suffering at the Sith?s hands, Anakin pulled Sidious even closer in the hard metallic embrace of his left arm, while his right gestured toward the remains of his little yellow starfighter. A blue-white arc of lightning instantly ignited the ship into a violent, incandescent inferno.

    ?Never again,? Anakin vowed, pressing his enemy against him as the blast engulfed them both.

    MMWWHahahahahaha!!!!!! [face_skull]

    :D

    You rock geo!
     
  23. DarthBreezy

    DarthBreezy Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Jun 4, 2002
  24. MoAngel

    MoAngel Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Jul 13, 2005
    AHHHHH....Now I'll be trying to think happy thoughts all day....AHHHHH!
     
  25. GunraysLawyer

    GunraysLawyer Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 23, 2003
    So much to think about....

    The Force and duality...

    What the power of the Sith actual is...

    The Jedi...

    The sacrifice and its meaning...

    More after I get a chanc eto think it thru.