main
side
curve
  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Before - Legends Hauntings from the Past: OC, Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan (40 BBY AU) Chapter 14 Posted 3/16

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Book-Geek, Oct 28, 2011.

  1. Book-Geek

    Book-Geek Jedi Knight star 3

    Registered:
    May 28, 2011
    Title: Hauntings From The Past, 1st installment of a trilogy.
    Author: Book-Geek (That'd be me!)
    Genre: Drama, Mystery, Humor, Romance (just a smidge)
    Timeframe: Starts in 40 BBY. AU
    My Costume: My costume is an OC main character in a multi-chapter story (the first of a trilogy) set in Before the Saga. I usually write with cannon characters, particularly romantic pairings, and mostly in Beyond the Saga. I've never used OCs as a main character, nor have I written anything from pre-Phantom Menace. Also, I tend to shy away from big projects such as this because of how limited my writing time is.

    Summary: Three Year Old Jane Mago has just arrived at the Jedi Temple from Corellia, bringing with her a piece of paper bearing the name of who her mother--former Jedi Knight Jocelyn Mago--left as her guardian, to train her in the ways of the Force as well as Corellian traditions. Unknowingly, Jane's presence brings up questions of why her mother left the Temple nearly four years before and who Jane's father is. And questioning who Jane really is.

    AN1: I will be starting a PM list. Just ask if you want on or off.

    AN2: This story shall be updated every other Friday.


    Prologue: In the Dead of Night

    The young woman hid her face behind the hood of her robe. She wasn?t trying to hide her features, but her tears. She gingerly placed a hand on her stomach and took a deep breath.

    I have to leave, She thought.

    She didn?t want the Council to know. She was a victim and knew there was no shame in that, but she didn?t want to admit that she was now pregnant with a Sith Lord?s child. She didn?t want her child alienated because of who sired the babe. Who would take a Sith?s offspring as their Padawan?

    She walked down the halls of the grand Jedi Temple, ran her fingers along the walls, taking in the beautiful features she had known since her childhood. This was her home, and now she was leaving, never to return.

    Holding back a sob, she repositioned her bag on her shoulder and walked out, never looking back once.


    Chapter One: Coruscant Arrival

    Three years and nine months later?

    She was small. She was stubborn. She was determined. She was smart.

    And she was lost.

    Jane Mago clutched her two prized possessions?a yellow blanket she had had since she was a baby and a piece of paper her mommy had given to her right before she died?closer to her as she looked around the planet-wide city. It was so busy, so active, so?. loud. Her big hazel eyes tried to take in everything, but it was impossible.

    Any normal three-year-old girl would have been scared and broke down crying on the spot. But Jane wasn?t normal.

    She was going to find the Jedi Temple, if it was the last thing she did.

    And if might possibly will be, Jane thought as she walked past some rather suspicious looking characters. Her lip curled in disgust as she stepped over the leg of a passed-out being, snoring in the alley near a tavern.

    No one case Jane a second glance. To them, she was just another street rat, an orphan living hidden in the shadows.

    Little did they know just how gifted she was.

    Jane finally stopped to rest and scowled as she looked up to see yet more and more layers of the world of Coruscant. She frowned; she was going to have to ask for directions.

    Jane hated to ask for help, especially from those who treated her like a child. Part of the problem, Jane realized, was that she didn?t feel like she was three years old. She felt much older, much wiser, thanks to the knowledge that her mother had given her.

    Jane sighed, but relented and asked for directions from a middle-aged woman out doing her weekly shopping.

    ?But where is your mommy, child?? The kindly woman asked, concerned and looked around for a woman with similar features as the little girl in front of her.

    ?My Mommy is dead,? Jane said softly. ?But my godfather lives at the Temple. I?m going to live with him and complete my training to become a Jedi Knight.?

    ?Oh, you poor dear,? The woman cooed, looking at J
     
  2. Hazel

    Hazel Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 9, 2010
    This is a very nice start, Book-Geek!

    I'm really looking foward to knowing more about Jane and I'm wondering who her father's supposed to be.

    PM please?
     
  3. mavjade

    mavjade Former Manager star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Sep 10, 2005
    Very good start!

    I wonder who little Jane's father is?? Poor child, to have her mother leave her at such a young age, it always makes me so sad. :(

    This looks to be very interesting. Would you mind putting me on your PM list?

    Good job and great costume! =D=
     
  4. obimom

    obimom Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Oct 31, 2010
    OMG...I'm liking this already.

    Yes, I would like a PM..it will be easier for me since I won't be around as much with going back to work. But I will be following this one.

    Good, interesting start!! =D=
     
  5. Luna_Nightshade

    Luna_Nightshade Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Jan 25, 2006
    Very creative start--I wonder who Jane's dad is, and what kind of relationship Jocelyn and Qui-Gon had. Jane is definitely a very smart cookie, hmm? Great and ambitious response to the challenge--PMs would be most appreciated so I don't miss updates.
     
  6. Book-Geek

    Book-Geek Jedi Knight star 3

    Registered:
    May 28, 2011
    I'm glad that everyone likes the first chapter and curious about who Jane's dad is. I hope to keep you guessing more and more about Jane's past as the story goes.[face_mischief]


    PM List:
    Hazel
    mavjade
    obimom
    Luna_Nighthade

    Just ask if you want on or off.
     
  7. Lady_Misty

    Lady_Misty Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 21, 2007
    A good start!
     
  8. Book-Geek

    Book-Geek Jedi Knight star 3

    Registered:
    May 28, 2011
    Thank you![:D]
     
  9. AzureAngel2

    AzureAngel2 Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Jun 14, 2005
    Yes, that is a haunting I would like to hear from. Please put me on your PM list.

    :D

     
  10. Book-Geek

    Book-Geek Jedi Knight star 3

    Registered:
    May 28, 2011
    You're on the list! :D

    PM List:

    Hazel
    mavjade
    obimom
    Luna_Nightshade
    AzureAngel2

    Just ask if you want on or off.
     
  11. Book-Geek

    Book-Geek Jedi Knight star 3

    Registered:
    May 28, 2011
    Chapter Two: An Enigma Named Jane

    Mace Windu stared down at the small girl, still trying to grasp the fact that she was Jocelyn?s daughter. And the fact that Jocelyn was dead.

    Who is her father, then? He wondered. He didn?t even know Jocelyn was pregnant.

    Nearly four years before, Jocelyn had vanished, causing a minor uproar, particularly amongst the younger students. Jocelyn taught beginner lightsaber courses and was adored by all the younglings for her knowledge, kindness and gentle nature.

    Upon checking Jocelyn?s quarters, they found all of her personal belongings had been packed, leading to the assumption that she had run away. No one knew why, as she left no note.

    No one had heard from her since.

    And now her three-year-old daughter had arrived at the Temple, demanding to be trained. Force, how she reminded him of Jocelyn?.

    Mace shook himself of that thought, pushing memories of his friend aside.

    He thanked the middle-age woman?who had stood at a close distance for the entire exchange?for escorting Jane to the Temple.

    ?It was nothing, Master Jedi,? The woman said. She smiled down at Jane. ?Good luck with your training, young one.?

    ?Thank you,? Jane said, returning the smile.

    After giving a final wave to the motherly woman, Jane turned to Mace.

    ?You?ve put me at an indisposition.? She said.

    ?I? have?? Mace asked, his brow furrowing at, not only her statement, but at her choice of words. Her vocabulary was very advanced for a three-year-old.

    ?Yes. You know my name, and you obviously knew my mother, but I do not know your name.? Jane pointed out.

    ?Ah,? Mace said with a nod. ?My name is Mace Windu.?

    ?What am I to call you?? Jane asked. ?Do I call you Master or Jedi or by your given name or surname??

    ?You can call me Master Windu,? Mace said. ?Follow me. We?re going to go to the Council Room.?

    As they walked to the Council room, Mace wondered briefly if Jane could be lying about who her mother was, but shoved that thought aside a second later. He had known Jocelyn since they were younglings and it was clear that Jane was a perfect copy of Jocelyn. Her long, silky brown hair tied back in a braid with a green ribbon. Her big, bright hazel eyes that seem to be changing color in the light and with her changing emotions. Her full lips curved into a sweet and innocent smile (Though, if she was anything like Jocelyn, she was rarely innocent). The little nose that crinkled with laughter. Her Corellian accent that coated her basic.

    Still, her appearance gave no indication as to who her father was. It puzzled Mace.

    ?Jane,? He asked, breaking the silence between the two. ?Do you know who your father is??

    ?I?d lie and say I don?t know, but I do,? Jane said, looking at her blanket. ?I won?t tell you his name, though. Just know that he is dead, and was dead long before I was born.?

    ?Was he Force-Sensitive?? Mace dared to ask.

    Jane?s hazel eyes became brown, hiding the green, signaling to Mace that she was frustrated and didn?t want to talk about her father. He was surprised at the sudden Jocelyn trait coming from the girl.

    ?That fact,? Jane said darkly. ?I shall keep to myself.?

    ?You said your mother started your training.? Mace said, wanting a change in the subject in hope for a reprieve from the dark glare coming from the girl.

    ?Yes. She taught me how to levitate things and to meditate and all the Corellian Jedi traditions,? Jane looked down at her blanket. ?Mommy wanted to follow the Corellian path, but no one would teach her here. She learned from an elderly Corellian Jedi before I was born and taught me what she had been taught. I want to complete my training and follow the traditional Jedi ways, but I want to stay true to my heritage. In a way, I want the best of both worlds.?

    Jane looked up at Mace.

    ?I?m kinda scared, Master Windu,? Jane said. ?What if Qui-Gon won?t take me as his apprentice even after I show him my paper and everything??

    ?Jane,? Mace said softly. ?There is something I need to tell you.?

    ?What?? Jane asked, feeling
     
  12. AzureAngel2

    AzureAngel2 Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Jun 14, 2005
    I hope we will find out her father's identity. I truely hope it is no sith lord, but some decent jedi knight.
     
  13. Hazel

    Hazel Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 9, 2010
    Jane is such a precocious child. I hope she fits in at the Temple.

    I wonder if Qui-Gon will be able to shed some light in her story. [face_thinking]
     
  14. Book-Geek

    Book-Geek Jedi Knight star 3

    Registered:
    May 28, 2011
    AzureAngel2: We shall see.[face_whistling]

    Hazel: Things will get much more interesting once Qui-Gon is introduced, I can promise you that. And the next chapter will see to Jane's Temple life.
     
  15. Lady_Misty

    Lady_Misty Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 21, 2007
    She is quite cute and slightly unnerving. But then my Anakin in The Chosen One is unnerving. [face_mischief]

    And I should go to bed soonish. I've got church tomorrow and the service starts a 9:00 am and it's closing in on 11:30 pm here.
     
  16. Book-Geek

    Book-Geek Jedi Knight star 3

    Registered:
    May 28, 2011
    You think Jane is unnerving? COOL![face_devil]

    Also, I think we're in the same time zone because the time stamp told me that you posted this near 11:30.
     
  17. mavjade

    mavjade Former Manager star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Sep 10, 2005
    Good update!

    I felt so bad for her when Mace told her Qui-gon already had an apprentice. :(

    Now I'm even more curious as to who her father is!

    =D=
     
  18. Luna_Nightshade

    Luna_Nightshade Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Jan 25, 2006
    That's one smart 3-year-old!

    Very curious to find out who the father is. Hopefully not a Sith Lord==I can see Yoda having a problem with that. Good update!
     
  19. Book-Geek

    Book-Geek Jedi Knight star 3

    Registered:
    May 28, 2011
    mavjade: I'm sorry I made you feel bad at that part! I promise, no more sad parts! (At least for the next few chapters anyway! [face_mischief] )

    Luna_Nightshade: Jane is very smart. As in, scary smart. You'll see what I mean next chapter! As for Jane's father... see, I'm dying to blurt out the secret, but "Jane" keeps glaring at me and doing this:[face_shhh] But she apparently controls my muse, so I have to listen. But let's just say that it's not Yoda who is going to have a problem with Jane's secret.
     
  20. Valairy Scot

    Valairy Scot Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Sep 16, 2005
    Bounces up and down - if it's not Yoda, then Qui? If so, Xanatos? (Though he wasn't a Sith in JA books.)

    What a precocious child - I wonder what Obi-Wan will think of her, especially her wanting to be Qui's padawan (I'm not sure how old he is here, 17 I guess if it's 40 BBY). I'm sure Qui will be quite enchanted.

    You've done a good job of writing a precocious cute child without slipping into Mary Sueness - well done! This looks to be an entertaining story and I'll be following it.
     
  21. Book-Geek

    Book-Geek Jedi Knight star 3

    Registered:
    May 28, 2011
    Valairy_Scot: I'm glad you like Jane and that you are interested in this story! Thank you for reading! :D



    Chapter Three: Temple Days


    Jane was bored.

    Insanely, mind numbingly bored.

    She did not like the Crèche. The other children had their friends and favorite toys to play with; in other words, they had their cliques. There was no one to have an invigorating conversation with, nothing particularly stimulating to play with and she had solved all the puzzles within the first three hours, even the ones used to encourage Force development.

    She was too smart for hanging around all day with these infants, she thought. She wanted to learn like older initiates. She had asked the caretaker if she could have a practice lightsaber, but her request was denied.

    ? ?You?re too young, Jane,? ? Jane mimicked the caretaker?s voice as she punched the pillow in her crib (how insulting!) before lying on her back to glare at the ceiling.

    If only I can show them what I can do, Jane thought. She turned on her side to glare at the crib bars and wrinkled her nose. She had been two when she figured out how to get out of cribs.

    Suddenly, Jane grinned. She knew what she was going to do.

    Jane carefully scaled the crib bars and tiptoes past the other cribs. After taking a glance behind her shoulder to check on the sleeping caretaker, she opened the door?

    And smiled as she took her first breath of freedom.

    Jane ran through the halls of the Temple, wanting to explore everything. She went from broom cupboard to classroom, to cafeteria, to the gardens and Room of the Thousand Fountains, the library, armory and the holographic map room.

    And then she found the training area. It was a huge room filled with mats and training lightsabers. She practiced her cartwheels, handsprings and handstands for a few minutes before picking up a lightsaber.

    She activated the blade. Smiling as she heard the hum, she gripped the saber in both hands and begun practicing her footwork, striking imaginary foes.

    She didn?t know how long she had been working with the blade, but she felt tired when she finally shut off the blade. She also felt sad. She missed practicing with her mommy?

    With a sigh, Jane turned to put the lightsaber back where she found it? and came face to face with the Crèche caretaker.

    Neither said a word for a minute, before Jane broke the silence:

    ?Yeah? I?m just going to assume I?m in trouble.? She said.

    ?Very much so,? The caretaker said dryly. ?But it seems you have proved me wrong. You are not too young to work with a lightsaber. Your mother taught you, I presume??

    Jane nodded.

    ?My mommy and I would practice for hours. She taught me all my footing and how to grip the hilt properly.?

    ?She did a fine job,? The caretaker praised. Then he sighed. ?Your mother was the best swordswoman of her class. She was much admired and envied for her skill, but all she wanted to use her skills for was to teach. I am happy to see that her love for teaching paid off. I will talk to the Council about starting your Temple education.?

    ?Really!? Jane exclaimed happily. ?No more Crèche??

    ?Only for sleeping and meals until Qui-Gon can take charge of you,? He looked at Jane and grinned. ?I do pity him so.?

    * * *

    The Crèche caretaker did talk with the Council, and they had the lightsaber masters test Jane. The Masters observed her footwork, how she did against remotes and an opponent. The trainers discovered that she was quite advanced for a child of her age and put her in an intermediate class with older initiates.

    Jane excelled in her class and impressed her teachers. But it was only one class that met for two hours a day, which left Jane bored in the Crèche again.

    When she asked if there were any texts she could study, it was discovered that she read on a very high level. One teacher introduced her to Madam Nu, who would let Jane have free run of the library, checking on the girl at intervals.

    Jane studied histories and science, theology and philosophy, literature
     
  22. Hazel

    Hazel Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 9, 2010
    I totally understand how Jane could be bored in the Creche and I'm glad the Masters gave her a chance. :)
     
  23. Shira_Adola

    Shira_Adola Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Feb 15, 2011
    Ok. I've been hovering for all these posts. I wasn't sure if I would continue reading, but I have, so PMs please?
     
  24. AzureAngel2

    AzureAngel2 Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Jun 14, 2005
    It is very difficult for a child to be that far ahead of everybody.

    [face_worried]

    I worked with such highly gifted children before. They are rather lonely in their age group.
     
  25. Luna_Nightshade

    Luna_Nightshade Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Jan 25, 2006
    Looks like she is managing to get some fun sneaking into classes! I'd love to just mess around in the library, too. Hope she meets Qui-Gon soon!