Books A/V STAR WARS: ROGUE #$^$%&ING ONE: A STAR WARS STORY

Because they have been told? Repeatedly?

I know those tellings aren't canon anymore, but that doesn't mean I want to see yet another take on the same well-worn subject.

Overwriting Legends in broad strokes, not just minor details, is missing the point of keeping them still in print and available.

 

I'd wager a large majority of Star Wars fans have no clue where / how the Death Star plans were stolen in the previous continuity. Since all of those previous versions do not exist in the current continuity, it's a movie with a big mission hook that ties directly into Episode VI. The fact that the Rebels stole the plans from the evil Imps does lend itself towards more of a military-style film, as the crawl sez "Rebel starships striking from a hidden base....During the battle, Rebel spies manged to seal secret plans". It's watching "Rogue One" wherein the plans are stolen, then jumping into Episode VI and "Hey! I just saw a movie of that! I know how that happened!" People read EU stuff to get a larger perspective on the Star Wars world, Rogue One would add that by making it about the Death Star plan mission.

Also I'm totally okay with "Here is the final, comprehensive, definitive story of how the Rebels stole the Death Star plans and that's it!" No more 15 freakin' different types of plans scattered across various mediums at different years. How were the plans stolen? Rogue One. Good, yay. Closure. Phew. Freakin' finally.

 

I simply cannot believe no one has mentioned this. Let's hope Jimmy Smitts returns to hire these rogue ones to steal the Death Star plans and maybe

Spoiler

if what I believe about the teaser showing Alderaan is actually correct his actual death.

 

You're right; the prospect of a single, unified vision of the death star plans being stolen is vastly less useful than the scenarios in which:

* Bria stole a bit
* Kyle stole a bit
* Keyan Farlander stole a bit
* Vin Diesel stole a bit
* That Twi'lek from that game nobody bought stole a bit
* The ship from EaW stole a bit
* Danny Ocean and his loveable rogues stole a bit
* Bane somehow knew where to find them and blew the floor in so he could access them, and
* Hamburgler stole a bit

Because as you well know, the most efficient use of a set of top secret plans is to split them up and scatter them. If you want to review the plans for any reason of course it's annoying to have to travel around and assemble them, but at least the Rebels can't steal them this way.

Side note: The person who was too spineless or indecisive to make a call on the one unified version of who stole the plans, preferring the asinine "parts of the plans" approach which is so stupid that I actually hate them for insulting our collective intelligence... well, I forget where I was going, but they're a **** human being and their work deserved to be undone without ceremony.

 

I've always envisioned Bail sitting on his fancy Alderaanian terrace, sipping his morning coffee, opens up the paper and the headline sez "IMPERIALS BUILD WORLD DESTROYING SUPERWEAPON" and he takes another sip, looks up, and sees the Death Star hovering in the sky.

"Aww, he---"

 

I think the most realistic aspect of the split plans approach was assuming that each document was itself complete, but they discussed technical readouts of certain specific systems.

I.E. Kyle stole a plan detailing the reactor.
Bria stole a plan detailing the ventilation shaft layout.
Keylan stole a plan detailing the nature of the turret defense system.
In Empire at War, they stole a plan detailing the floor layout.

Ect. ect. ect.

It's reasonable to assume that different stations specialized in constructing different components.

That's about the only way that approach could ever work.

Of course, having a film be the definitive theft isn't bad. If one somehow wishes to keep any other version of the theft around, just assume one or two other versions exists where they get the above. Even I agree the old approach was too convoluted, but you can keep one or two missions if you wish (I'd like to keep Kyle's theft around myself).

 

If what they steal aren't literally tapes then the ball has been dropped. Big time.

AAAAND I know exactly how Jones and co can smuggle the tapes out!



Except this time it can just be "Great Imperial Marches" of course.

Another ball-dropping opportunity: not having Tarkin say "I do so hate martial music."

 

Well, recent (Legends) canon did have the superlaser striking his backyard.

Seriously.

 

No, it's not. It's not reasonable. It's in fact the very definition of the diametric opposite of reasonable.

 

Say what you will, but then I invite you to enjoy Rogue One stepping on that retcon if you wish. It was never one I was particularly fond of either.

But people will think what they wish

 

If he doesn't hire them, at least a poignant cameo at the end. Would be very much a missed opportunity, and a great farewell to Bail. And, of course, we'd have to see how the plans got transferred to R2!

 

How many Death Star Plan thefts were there in the Legacy timeline? I only remember the Kyle Katarn mission

 

I don't think anyone is going to believe that until the movie comes out, and they'll still insist that he was in the film, just moving too fast for anyone to see.

Even being banished to non-canon status can't stop him!

 

he was invisible

 

I wish. But no, Abel or Pablo or one of them had to squish them all into an insultingly idiotic scenario.

 

And that includes the fans who are intimately familiar with the EU.

 

Kyle Katarn exists.

He just doesn't exist in the Second Universe.

Pfft.

 

If Bail appears played by Jimmy Smits I will totally forgive the misleading title. He was one of the best parts of the PT.

 

a) Felicity Jones as Bria Tharen. Just for the trolling value.

b) Can we get Aaron Allston to consult for this via ouija board or time travel or possession or something?

c) The comic panel above of the Death Star laser hitting Bail's back garden actually made me spit my coffee out with laughter.

 

"Dantooine is too remote for an effective demonstration. Viceroy Organa's rhododendron bush however is a prime opportunity."

 

Several people who were at the panel confirming that it was mentioned the movie wouldn't have an opening crawl, which I am totally okay with. Keep those for the episodes, bend the style of Star Wars for the Anthologies so we get something different.

also I'm okay if this happens:

 

A) You are a genius. Yes, I think having her be Bria Tharen may actually be better than Kylie Katarn.

C) I'd almost stopped laughing over that picture and now I'm laughing about it again. I guess I get what the artist was going for, but was there no other way to do it?

 

I'd be happy if it's like the main title of The Clone Wars episodes. In fact that's the only thing missing from Rebels IMO.

 

If this movie doesn't have literal data tapes I'm gonna be pissed.