Saga A Scoundrel's Life

The Journal of Loch Thrindarr--

Summary: Loch, pronounced "Lock" is a human pilot, gambler, ladie's man and all around bon vivant whose life is thrown into turmoil after the loss of his sister. He is reluctant to keep a journal, but I'm making him do it, so there!

Day Cycle 1

Okay, something?s clearly wrong with me or I wouldn?t be wasting my time writing this crap down.

It?s the space travel. It?s so monotonous. There?s nothing to do but sit around and drink?and the whiskey I?ve got tastes like a bantha pissed in it. Of course, that doesn?t seem to be slowing me down any?it?s funny, I used to tease Nera for writing in her journal, and then what do I turn around and do to entertain myself? Yep. Sorry honey!

If I had any sense left I?d put my datapad to good use?looking up blondes in compromising situations, but clearly sense is gone. Nope, nothing left to do but sit here and fall into useless introspection. I say useless because there?s no good to be gained from any of this. All it does is depress you that your life is so insignificant. That you?ve made too many mistakes. That you drink too much Corellian whiskey--too much bad Corellian whiskey.

Being locked in this tin can with no one but myself is wearing on me. Giving me strange ideas. Giving me too much time to think. I don?t even have Nera around to bounce stuff off of anymore?and that?s the problem really, isn?t it? She?s gone and there?s nothing I can do about it. And there?s no one here but me. Force I miss her.

No matter what life threw at us, I always knew we were in it together. The crappy foster homes, the days of scrimping by eating frozen nerf and bundling up in blankets because the heat got turned off. None of it mattered, because my sister was with me. Hey, and I guess having someone around that firmly believed I was the greatest guy in the galaxy helped. I don?t feel the same now. That Lochlann Thrindarr magic is gone. I?m not anyone?s greatest guy in the galaxy, I?m just another pilot, who drinks too much, transporting Force knows what to some crappy colony in the middle of nowhere.

Okay Nera, I don?t see how this ?helped? you to write stuff down. Or what perspective you gained from doing so. Because right now the only perspective I see is the scuffed seat in front of me. But I?ll be out of light speed soon enough. Better lay off the bantha pi...er whiskey!I need my head about me to lay on some Thrindarr charm. Never know who'll be planetside. With my luck, a bunch of wookies--but hey, I'll be an optomist. I'm hoping for attractive natives with a distinct shortage of available men!

 

?it?s funny, I used to tease Nera for writing in her journal, and then what do I turn around and do to entertain myself? Yep. Sorry honey!

That's siblings for you.

I'm curious. What kinds of beings WILL he encounter planetside? Somehow I doubt it'll be what he's hoping for.

PM me when you update?

 

Thanks for reading it, and for the feedback. I'll PM you when I update! Errr...excuse me, when Loch updates.

 

Journaling is a useful tool for anyone in emotional turmoil. Loch didn't exactly have a holovid childhood did he? I have a bad feeling about his planetfall...he should have lots more to write about.

 

Entry 2

Okay, so I remember now why I?m not an optimist. Aforementioned trip planetside is so far, not what I?d expected. After I landed at my delivery point and let them unload whatever it was I was hauling (I don?t even ask anymore, I?d rather not know) I decided that I?d stretch my legs a bit and then head out.

I really want to get back to Corellia. So tried to limp out of port?except piece of crap transport furnished to me by the client couldn?t make lightspeed. So I go back, find out it needs a part that they have to order elsewhere.

I make a call to the client. He tells me to cover the cost and he?ll reimburse me when I get back. I tell him that wasn?t part of the deal and tell him where to shove said transport. He tells me then I can find my own way back to Corellia. Right, so I tell him that when I do find my way back?well maybe I shouldn?t put that part in writing.
So, the problem is if I book a passage on a community transport, it?ll probably be more expensive then paying for the Gambit to be fixed. Part of me has half a mind to do it just to be a jerk. Yet the larger part of me disdains cramped quarters with smelly sentients.

So I think I?m trapped and have no choice but to hang around here while crappy transport is repaired by someone with more than a rudimentary knowledge of how to use a hydrospanner. Hey, I can fly ?em, but I can?t fix ?em, I?m sorry to say. I?ll put that on my list of things to learn?like tact and restraint.

I?m starving and will grab a bite to eat. Maybe try to worm my way into a game of Sabaac. I can almost hear my sister?s voice now. My response to that is: C?mon honey, how much trouble could I possibly get into with a few harmless games?

 

Harmless? Ha.

This guy's got a bit of a Han Solo thing gong on, but he's definitely got his own style as well.

Thanks for the PM!

 

You noticed--my little Lochie's a lot like Han, a little like Lando, and I hope, distinctly himself. Thanks for the feed back.

 

This is great. PM me!

 

Entry 3
Ok, so I lost some credits. It wouldn?t have been a problem at all if I hadn?t lost the money needed to pay to fix the transport?which shouldn?t have been my responsibility in the first place. Now I?m bored and broke and I had to stiff the guy who fixed The Gambit.

Luckily I was able to persuade him to let me have the ship anyway. Well, actually I was able to schmooze the guy?s wife and get her to persuade him that I was trustworthy. I had some crap to give him as collateral and the promise that I?ll see to it that the nerfherder who hired me pays him.

Now I have nothing to look forward to but a long trip home. I?m not liking this at all. I?ve got too much time to think.
My mind plays tricks on me in the solitude of hyperspace?I almost feel like Nera?s still here?watching me. Admonishing me. Sometimes the hair on my arms stands up. It?s weird and a bit uncomfortable.

And yet?at the same time I welcome it. Welcome the last traces of all that I had loved or will ever love near me, if only in my mind. Strange honey, I know. But I don?t want to let you go.

Not yet. Not yet.

 

I wonder what happened to his sister?

Luckily I was able to persuade him to let me have the ship anyway. Well, actually I was able to schmooze the guy?s wife and get her to persuade him that I was trustworthy. I had some crap to give him as collateral and the promise that I?ll see to it that the nerfherder who hired me pays him.

Hmm, this guy is a scoundrel.

Kewl update, celine. Thankee for the PM!

 

So, I wonder if Nera is haunting him, literally.
I wonder if Loch likes Twinkie's?

 

hmmm I wonder how he persuaded the wife??? lol this is good keep it up

 

Entry 4

I am definitely losing my mind out here. I keep dreaming of my sister. Or hearing her voice, just faintly on the air. I?ve made up my mind not to do anymore of these runs. I?m tired of piloting into the vast reaches of space carrying cargo. I like to fly. Don?t get me wrong?I love it, but this isn?t flying. This is plugging coordinates into the nav computer and sitting around for a week doing nothing.

I could go back to my old job aboard the ?Galactic Jewel.? At least that had a large crew to hang with and nothing beats spending weeks on a pleasure transport! Women, gambling, shows. I can?t say it got old exactly, but I just don?t think I can be everyone?s happy-go-lucky Loch anymore. It feels like work now.

Like a lie.

Like I can?t be who I am anymore. I want to be him. I want to be the one that everyone notices when I walk into the room. The one who always has a witty remark and an extra credit to buy a friend a drink.

That was me and that?s what everyone will expect?and there?s no use trying to recapture glory days. They?re gone. That Lochlann Thrindarr magic is gone.

I could go back into piloting for a limo-speeder service. Good tips. Weird hours. A lot of sitting around doing nothing. Plenty of people to network with, though.

I?m lost, adrift, like a ship after a rough storm.--Typing random thoughts into a datapad. Like that ever helped anything.

Oh?I DO have a little company. Some felinoid creature curled up in the cargo bay while they were fixing this thing. I heard mewling about two hours into hyperspace. I?m not turning around to bring it back?and I don?t have the heart to throw it out the airlock, so I guess it?s stuck with me. It?s chewing on my finger as I type. Lovely.

 

Aw, that's sad. He's lost his sister and it really brought him down.

Now all he has for a friend is the Star Wars version of a cat, who thinks his fingers might make a tasty snack.

Lovely update, celine. This guy, he's got many layers. There's the flippant, rock of a scoundrel; the depressed guy who misses his sister; the happy guy, who's everyone's friend...

Can't wait to learn more about Loch!

 

I think both Loch and the cat could use some Twinkies!

 

Entry 6

I give up. The annoying fuzzball will not leave me alone. It watches me constantly. It?s staring at me now in fact, with big saucer eyes that glow-in-the-dark. It sleeps in my dirty laundry pile, or on my head.

I keep trying to ignore it, but the more I do, the more insistent it gets. I?m not really sure what I?ll do with it when I get back. Maybe I?ll just leave it aboard the ship as a present to my employer. I?m not sure what he?d do with it though, and I?m almost starting to feel responsible for it. What is wrong with me?

 

Entry 7
Too much whiskey. Wow, I gotta curb this when I?m alone. Or alone with strange felinoids still chewing on my finger.

I want to think of something else but you, Nera. But I can?t. I know I need to go through your things when I get back to Corellia. I should?ve already. I should?ve been responsible enough to handle all this on my own, but I wasn?t.

I hope you don?t mind that Sola threw everything into a large box and is holding onto it for me until I get the strength to sort it. She?s a good girl, Sola. A much better friend than I deserve in a way.

It?s weird. Everyone always considers me a ?man?s man? and yet, my dearest loves in this world have always been female.

I even think the cat?s a girl.

 

It sleeps in my dirty laundry pile, or on my head.

Yep, that sounds about right. Do you perhaps have a furry feline that you're basing Loch's new-found fem friend off of?

Short but sweet updates, celine! Can't wait for more.

 

how did you know that I am a victim of kitties? I'm guessing you are too!

 

Ahh...the familiar monologue of the emotional retard. I feel for you Loch. May I suggest Dr. Philzug, the hutt psycologist? There is nothing that a vibroblade and stun therapy can't help.

 

alas, Dr. Philzug is booked for the next two years. I think Loch will have to deal with this on his own.

And watch whose alter-ego you refer to as an emotional retard, buddy!

 

Entry 8
I even think the cat?s a girl. Perhaps why she?s in love with me?

To tell the truth, I?ve realized that I?m so used to getting my way with females (humanoid ones anyway) that when one completely rebuffs me I?m almost perplexed. Makes me go after her twice as hard to prove to myself that the Thrindarr charm still works.

Force, I don?t like all this introspection. Normally, I try hard to avoid it. I don?t like what I find, often. I try hard to forget where I came from, what I?ve done. What I had to do. And mostly I think I?m a little afraid. Afraid that deep down I?m like my father. And that thought scares the hell out of me.

Am I capable of the things he?s done?

I like to think that I?m nothing like him, but then sometimes I see similarities. In my behavior, certainly. Even small things, like the inflection of my voice, or an expression I catch in the mirror. Of course, I haven?t seen him in a very long time, but I remember enough about him. Too much.

 

Hm.....he doesn't seem to be a big fan of his father. To say the least.

I wonder why not? What did his dad do?

I look forward to learning more about this mysterious Loch Thrindarr. He always leaves me with so many questions. More soon, celine!

 

Let's see. He's lost his sister. Had a bad father, and probably childhood. And he's an emotional retard.

 

Hmmm...takes one to know one, weasley! LOL.