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Saga [DDC 2015] The Chronicles of I-5YQ (Updated 12/22/15-Complete)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Ewok_Slayer, Jan 9, 2015.

  1. Ewok_Slayer

    Ewok_Slayer Jedi Master star 2

    Nov 24, 2004
    This journal starts off where my 2014 DDC fanfic,]The[/url] Journal of Jax Pavan, left off. I simply changed the character POV. I was asked by a couple of my readers if I would write my journal in the POV of Jax's droid friend, I-Five. At that time I said no because I didn't think I could get into a sentient droid's head. I still don't know if I can do it, but I am going to try. I know where I left off in the last journal didn't leave me with much to write about. Jax was spared by Vader but told to disappear. Jax won't go back to the rebellion, but he does own a spaceship and is out of a job. I am thinking he could find work as a smuggler or a trader in the outer rim. I am not sure what I am going to write about. I am a seat-of-my-pants type of writer. I never outline or prepare in any way. Any plot suggestions would be appreciated.

    The first entry is more of a character introduction than anything else.


    Here is another drawing done by VagabondX


    File location: Auxiliary memory and Removable Storage
    Encoded: Cryptic

    Entry 1

    I am I-5YQ. I began my existence as an ordinary 5YQ-series protocol droid. Days after I was manufactured I was purchase by a wealthy couple that sadly reproduced and spawned the most disagreeable offspring I ever had the misfortune of encountering. For entertainment these foul creatures would order me to jump off buildings or perform other destructive activities until I was shattered and malfunctioning. I was then unceremoniously shipped off to a junk dealer who intended to dismantle and sell me for parts.

    Fortunately, a human information broker named Lorn Pavan purchased me. Pavan was not a rich man and could not afford an authorized I-5YQ technician to perform my repairs. Instead, he refurbished my damaged systems himself. Either by design or by accident, my creative dampeners were disabled during Pavan’s modifications and repairs. The alteration of my computer brain resulted in my ability to learn and think. Without computer processor restrictions I gradually became self-aware and developed free will. Simply stated, I am now sentient. Lorn Pavan was the first organic being to treat me as something other than a droid. He called me a friend and considered me his equal.

    My friend had a unpleasant relationship with the Jedi Order, having once worked at the Jedi Temple. When the Jedi discovered his son Jax was Force sensitive the youngling was invited to train as a Jedi. Pavan allowed his son to go to the temple thinking he could see him daily, but as soon as Jax became a padawan the Temple fired the elder Pavan so the child would not develop an attachment to his father. Lorn felt betrayed. The loss of his son created marital discord with his wife and his spouse soon divorced him.

    He failed to get his son back from the Jedi, but he continued to attempt contact with the boy. During a particularly perilous situation he gave me a mission in the event of his death—to one day locate and protect his son.

    It wasn’t until after Emperor Palpatine ordered the destruction of the Jedi Order that I finally encountered Jax Pavan. The young man was not particularly pleased to make my acquaintance. The existence of a sentient droid he found somewhat disconcerting. Fortunately, the younger Pavan had an innate ability to befriend people…including droids.

    For the last year I have worked with Jax Pavan in an effort to overthrow Palpatine’s empire. Jax’s band of freedom fighters also include: Den Dhur, a Sullustan reporter turned insurgent; Sacha Swiftbird a former Antarian Ranger; Magash Drashi, a Dathomiri witch; Norro, a thirteen-year-old boy rescued from the prison planet Despayre.

    Our small group fought to overthrow the new Imperial regime until recently. A few weeks ago Sacha and Jax became romantically involved and mated. This resulted in a pregnancy. After a run in with Darth Vader Jax has decided the only way to ensure the safety of his friends and family is to avoid contact with the new empire. We are currently searching for a world where we can live in peace.

    I have never witnessed the fabrication of a new human. For this reason, I intend to record events during the gestation period, the newborn’s release from uterine confinement and the growth of the nascent human.

    As a droid I record everything I see and hear, but there is always the chance of file deletions. Therefore I am compiling my thoughts and observations in journal format and saving the information on my internal hard drive and an additional copy on a removable memory card.

    Entry 2

    Our group is currently onboard a Helix-Class light interceptor named Laranth for destinations unknown. Jax named the ship after Laranth Tarak, a Twi’lek rebel who died to save me, Den and Jax. She was Jax’s first love and he deeply mourned her death for a year.

    I also was affected by Laranth’s death. I am unsure if what I felt could be classified as sadness, but I found myself replaying the circumstances leading to her death over and over through my databanks. It was an illogical information loop, but it did occur frequently for weeks.

    Den told me he also experienced the same reoccurring thoughts and wished he could go back into time and change things. I informed him that while time dilation has been known to occur it usually allows movement only from the present to the far future and not into the past. At that point Den informed me his words should not be taken literally.

    I am pleased that Jax is no longer depressed. He has fallen in love and has started the process of procreation. This morning I entered the ship’s flight deck only to find Sacha and Jax in a close embrace and osculating. I quickly slipped out of the cockpit before they noticed me. I have determined they prefer privacy when performing their pre-copulation mating rituals.

    Presently, I am occupying my Human Replica Droid body. I have various models to include an Artoo chassis and a 501-Z police droid model. My original protocol droid chassis was damaged in combat and patched together with cannibalized parts from other droids. If an inebriated monkey-lizard decided to build a deformed droid—it would probably look like my protocol chassis. At this time, I only have my droid brain transferred into that chassis if there is a good chance of a mission ending in my decapitation...which happens more often than I would care to admit.

    I prefer my HRD body, especially when interacting with sentients. When in an Artoo form my friends often forget I am in the room. I become another machine akin to a food synthesizer or a hyperdrive.

    I also favor the HRD frame because it is the most advanced chassis I have ever occupied. HRD droids were designed to function as decoys or spies. Their synthskin and biofiber outer shell is indistinguishable from humans.

    I have downloaded the human behavioral programs from the original droid’s brain, but, because of the complexity of the model, there are smaller droid brains located throughout the body that control behaviors that simulate human functions. It appears these brains’ programs are triggered automatically. For example, my eyes will unnecessarily blink when exposed to bright light. When I sense cold temperatures my body simulates a pilomotor reflex causing small bumps to spread across my arms and legs. I am designed to react as a human.

    I find human osculation extremely interesting and baffling at the same time. I do not understand why the pressing of the lips causes Jax and Sacha so much pleasure. I have researched the history behind the gesture and some scientists believe it was a form of pre-mastication in primitive man. Mothers would chew food and then deposit the bolus to the infant child’s mouth. Humans no longer need to regurgitate food to feed their young, so I was curious as to why the behavior persisted.

    I went to the dining area of the ship and found Magash sitting at a table and sipping a drink. I sat down across from her and gave her my most serious expression. “I would like to experience the sensation of kissing. Can you assist me?”

    Magash, a Zabrak/human hybrid, started choking on her drink. When she recovered she gave me what I interpreted as a look of incredulity. “You want to kiss me?”

    “Yes. It is purely for research. I would like to record this body's reaction to that particular form of intimate contact.”

    She laughed and shook her head which I interpreted as as a negative response.

    “I understand. I will ask Den for his assistance.”

    She laughed at that suggestion. “Den is not only a Sullustan but a male.”

    “Does that matter?”

    Magash smirked. “Your programing might be species and gender specific.”

    That was a logical possibility. “Perhaps I should ask Sacha.”

    She once again found humor in my suggestion. “Not unless you want to get Jax upset. Those two have bonded and bonded couples are possessive of each other.”

    “I understand.” I rose out of my seat and began to walk away but Magash stood and grasped me by my arm. When I turned around she moved her hands to the back of my cranium and pulled me towards her until our lips were firmly pressed together. I was stunned at the programming responses activated by the various smaller brains controlling what would be involuntary responses in humans. I felt the pilomotor reflex activating. My eyebrows rose reflexively. My eyes dilated and I felt a shift of various hydraulic fluids. When Magash gently sucked on my lower lip I became concerned. I didn’t want her damaging my HRD body. Fortunately Den walked into the room which caused Magash to pull away.

    “Whoa!” Den gasped as his head turned back-and-forth between me and Magash in an almost comical gesticulation. “What is going on?”

    Magash turned away and I noticed her skin temperature rose slightly. It was a human reaction I recognized as embarrassment. “I asked Magash if she would allow me to kiss her so I could record any reflex responses of this HRD body.”

    Den's eyes examined me closely before biting down on his bottom lip. He shook his head a few times before running a hand over his face. “I would say your droid body had a response.” He grabbed me by the arm and pulled me into our cabin. He looked down at my trousers. “I-Five, remember when you said those fleshy protrusions below your belt line were ornamental in nature…well, I think you were incorrect in that assessment.”

    I looked down to where he was gesturing and realized this body was more fully functional than I realized. I gazed at Den in disbelief. “Why would a droid be programed for this type of response?”

    My friend laughed before dropping down on his bunk. “Because humans are a bit strange. I am fairly sure when the first human-like droid was created the first question was, ‘Can we kriff it?’”

    “I am extremely surprised at the results of my experiment. Smaller auxiliary brains throughout my body control these autonomic reactions. This was not a conscious response.”

    Den laid back on his bunk and started laughing in a near hysterical manner. When he caught his breath he grinned at me. “Are you saying your little brain was thinking for the big brain?”

    I considered his words for a moment. “I believe my earlier comments could be interpreted as such.”

    Den picked up a pillow and put it over his head in an attempt to muffle his laughter.

    “I fail to see the humor.” I sat down next to Den. “How long will this reaction last?”

    He sat up and shrugged. “I think when the stimuli is taken away you should return to normal.” His gaze raked over me. “You look fine now.”

    My droid brain attempted to process the sensations surging through my circuits. I could analyze what happened in a detached manner as a droid, but as a sentient I was experiencing confusion…because I felt something new. It was a reaction unfamiliar to me, but not unpleasant. I need to research this matter in more detail.

    This is a very interesting development.
    aalagartassle, Revanfan1 and Kahara like this.
  2. Kahara

    Kahara Chosen One star 4

    Mar 3, 2001
    Yay! I'm really glad to see these characters' story continued. I like the I-5 voice here; his terms for various human behaviors (osculation [face_laugh]) and how he observes everything and is constantly trying to figure it all out. Jax is going to be so scarred for life when he finds out about his droid brother's experiments in osculation. [face_rofl] No words. There will just be... no words.

    Uncle I-5 does have a ring to it... [face_laugh]
    Ewok_Slayer likes this.
  3. Revanfan1

    Revanfan1 Force Ghost star 6

    Jun 3, 2013
    Oh, kark, I-Five and Magash. [face_rofl]

    I am so glad you're doing this! =D=
    Ewok_Slayer and Kahara like this.
  4. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Aug 31, 2004
    [face_rofl] This is as hilarious as I thought but at the same time more than I imagined [face_rofl] I-5's voice is so unique! [face_mischief] And oh, the fun continues! [:D]
    Ewok_Slayer and Kahara like this.
  5. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Chosen One star 6

    Aug 21, 2006
    I-5 is a fun to read. Hilarious and reminding me of a certain Star Trek droid. Great to see the fun continuing.
    I-5 on undercover missions;)[face_thinking]
    Ewok_Slayer, Kahara and Nyota's Heart like this.
  6. Chyntuck

    Chyntuck Force Ghost star 5

    Jul 11, 2014
    Yay yay yay! I-Five is back, and he's back with a vengeance! I absolutely adore how you captured his voice, down to the last detail of his occasionally Threepio-ish tone. And, well, I-Five discovering sexual attraction? This promises to be hilarious!

    I'm happy to see the Laranth's motley crew back for more adventures, and I hope Norro will make an appearance in the OC Revolution thread :)
    Revanfan1, Kahara and Nyota's Heart like this.
  7. darth_treyvah

    darth_treyvah Jedi Master star 3

    Dec 26, 2005
    There need to be more stories about and from the perspective of droids. And I-Five is one special personality. He is going through an awakening and it must be confusing and, when he realizes the emotion, rather scary but exciting too. I'm glad you are continuing the story of this band through I-Five's perspective. I look forward to reading more from you, Ewok_Slayer.
    Nyota's Heart likes this.
  8. Ewok_Slayer

    Ewok_Slayer Jedi Master star 2

    Nov 24, 2004
    I think he will enjoy being an Uncle to Jax's baby.

    Thanks! I appreciate you reading. I bet 99% of the readers don't know who I-Five is.

    Thanks! I hope I can think of stuff for these guys to do.

    I always love Data saying to Sasha, "I am fully functional".

    I don't think TOS would allow a droid/zabrak love affair, but I have read a story where Luke has a love relationship with Artoo...and it is posted on these who knows what I can get away with. :p

    Thanks! I hope I don't disappoint. When I finished last years journal in Jax's POV I sort of made it difficult to make a sequel. I now have to think of a way for the gang to make a living without running into Imperials.

    Thanks everybody for reading. I have to admit this is probably the most difficult fanfic I have ever attempted to write. Getting into a droid's head is hard. Hazel makes it look easy with her Artoo DDC's (which are great). I hope I don't crash and burn and not finish this. Any suggestions would be appreciated. And to the person who suggested that "I get Magash and I-Five bootknocking"...I'm sorry, but I don't think that's going to happen. :p I think we are going to have a very confused sexually frustrated droid. I know that sounds silly but imagine you have a human replica droid programs to mimic human emotions and human bodily functions. Add to that a sentient droid brain and I think you have something similar to Data on Star Trek where he at one point wants more to his existence. This is not going to entirely focus on I-Five's problems. I am going to throw in Jax and Sacha, Den, Magash and Norro's adventures. I just have to think of these adventures. [face_worried]

    Thanks again for reading and reviewing!
    Entry 3

    Today Jax called a meeting of all crew members to discuss which planet would be most suitable for permanent residence.

    We departed from Dathomir a few days ago, having stayed with Magash’s sister witches of the Singing Mountain Clan. I cannot say I miss the planet or the witches. The inhabitants are technologically backwards and were somewhat fearful of me because they could sense a faint Force-echo radiating from within my droid body.

    Jax noticed this peculiar phenomenon over a year ago and is still unable to explain it. To Jax’s knowledge only living things give off Force energies. I have done some research on the matter and discovered this is not entirely true. There are crystals that manifest the Force. These crystals (the locals call them Spook Crystals) come from the planet Nam Chorios and are considered mineral life forms. Unfortunately, the existence non-organic Force sensitive lifeforms does not explain my condition.

    Magash once asked if a Nightsister used spirit ichor to infuse me with life energies. She was so concerned that I was some form of magic Totem that she used her Dathomir Witch magic to scan me through the Force. It was a strange sensation. I could feel her presence rush through my chassis and over my circuits. I felt violated at the time. I doubt I would find the experience as invasive now that we are friends.

    After she scanned me she declared, “Whatever is in him is not from darkness.” That is comforting.

    The other members of the Singing Mountain Clan were not as confident as Magash. They were uneasy in my presence and would stare at me suspiciously while sharing distrustful whispers.

    After leaving Dathomir we headed toward the closest hyperspace lane. Now that we have arrived, we will decide what planets to reconnoiter.

    We crowded around the galley table where Jax was seated at a center seat, datapad in hand. “We’ve arrived to the Hydian Way hyperspace lane. From here we can go just about anywhere we want.” He pushed a few buttons on the datapad and brought up a star chart. “We definitely want to avoid the core, but we might be safe as close as the mid-core. We absolutely want to stay away from planets with Imperial garrisons.”

    Norro raised a hand. “That leaves out Despayre, I guess.”

    Jax chuckled. “I guarantee nobody here wants to go back to that nightmare planet.” He gazed at the chart. “A planet like Null or Taris might be far enough away from the empire to avoid Imperial entanglements. Or we could go much further out such as Dagobah or some other rimworld planet.”

    The remainder of the conversation was what most humans would consider tedious, therefore I will simply post the results from our discussion:

    Ylesia and Teth—located in Hutt Space, therefore too dangerous.

    Null—the planet is still recovering from the Clone Wars. It was a battlefield between the Separatists and Republic.

    Taris—member of the Council of Neutral Systems, but is besieged by government and military corruption.

    Endor—terrestrial world with breathable air, but full of disagreeable fauna and flora, to include man-eating Ewoks, Duloks, Gorphs, Bordoks, Gorax, Frost Spirits, Forest Giants, Ice Demons, Grass Trekkers, Venom rats, Teeks, Shrieks, Ogres, Dandelion Warriors, and giant cave dwelling arachnids.

    Also, according to legend, on the Forest moon there is a mountain (called Mount Sorrow) that is reportedly sentient with the ability to cry healing tears. I find this legend implausible, but the possible existence of another non-organic sentient is interesting. We decided Endor had too many dangerous or annoying indigenous creatures to make it a viable option for settlement.

    Bakura—this planet might become an Imperial target due to its repulsarlift industry.

    Hoth—according to Sacha, “That planet is too damn cold!” Jax was concerned that certain parts of his anatomy might freeze off. Sacha also expressed apprehension stating she wanted Jax in one piece.

    Tatooine—This option was a resounding ‘No!’ I didn’t like the anti-droid prejudice and the females of our group said the sun and heat was bad for their complexion.

    Dagobah—we researched Republic surveys of the planet and decided we didn’t wish to live in a swamp.

    Rishi—terrestrial climate, breathable air and far from the galactic core. Human colonists already exist there along with the native Rishi which is a wing sentient species that live in the mountains. This is a possibility.

    Myrkr—terrestrial world, breathable air. Feasible option.

    Phindar- Tropical, breathable air. Feasible.

    Yavin IV- Terrestrial with breathable air. Feasible.

    The last four planets were put on our list of places to visit.

    After discussing the situation at length we decided to travel to the closest planet—Phindar.

    After the meeting broke up Sacha and Jax went to the flight deck and Den and Norro retired to our cabin, leaving me and Magash in the galley alone. I glanced over and gave her my most contrite expression. “I apologize if I caused you embarrassment earlier.”

    She shrugged. “It appears Den has not mentioned our encounter to Jax and Sacha.”

    “I agree. Since Sacha and Jax have not teased me about the kiss, there is a ninety-nine percent probability that Den has not mentioned our osculation research.”

    She smiled. “It doesn’t matter if he did. It was just a scientific experiment.” She gave me a curious gaze. “Correct?”

    “Of course.”

    She cocked her head to the side in what I recognize as the human/zabrak gesture for curiosity. “What were the results of your experiment?”

    I sat motionless for a moment as a strange sensation washed over me. I believe it was akin to reluctance or perhaps embarrassment. I do not know if I have the capacity to experience true embarrassment, but for some reason I did not want to reveal the outcome of the trial in its entirety.

    “The experiment had some unusual results,” I finally admitted.

    “Such as?”

    My droid brain balked at continuing, but I forged forward. “I discovered my Human Replica Droid chassis is capable of physical sensations similar to that of a human. In addition, I also experienced, what I would call, an affective state of consciousness.”

    She raised an eyebrow. “An affective state of consciousness?”

    I thought of the best way to reword that sentence. “I experienced feelings or emotions.”

    Both of her brows rose at that comment. “What type of feelings?”

    I looked down at the table as I collected my thoughts. “I do not have the proper vocabulary or understanding to adequately explain what I felt. I can tell you it was not an unpleasant sensation.” I hesitated for a moment. “I also experienced a physical reaction to the kiss and your close proximity. Apparently the engineers who designed this HRD body decided to make it fully functional.”

    Magash’s jaw dropped. “What?”

    I felt a warming of my facial tissue which I assume was this body’s attempt to mimic a human blush. “I found the kiss…stimulating.” I decided since both Magash and I were distressed by the conversation that I would throw in some levity. “Was it good for you?”

    She stared at me slack jawed for a moment before she shook her head with a laugh. “I was told you are developing a sense of humor.” She stood and gave me a wide smile. “You fooled me with your amusing story.”

    “Yes, my amusing story.” I decided if she did not wish to believe what I had revealed, that was acceptable.

    Magash laughed as she moved to the back cargo bay where she converted a large storage closet into a sleeping area. She wanted Sacha and Jax to have a cabin of their own. Den and Norro offered to give her our cabin, but she declined stating Dathomiri witches prefer more rustic accommodations.

    Before she left the galley she turned to me and winked. “To answer your question. It was good for me.”

    My lower jaw dropped involuntarily before realizing I had just witnessed Magash’s attempt at humor.

    “This should be an interesting trip,” I remarked as she exited the room. I stood and moved toward my cabin. “I must be becoming more human. I am already talking to myself.”
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  9. Revanfan1

    Revanfan1 Force Ghost star 6

    Jun 3, 2013
    Oh my. have no idea! [face_laugh]

    I-Five totally sounded like Data to me in this entry!
    Kahara, Ewok_Slayer and Nyota's Heart like this.
  10. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Aug 31, 2004
    To me, too. Yay! LOL I think they have 4 good prospects in where to settle. :) I was amused at all the dangers Endor is purported to have, up to and including the voracious Ewoks. ;)
    Kahara and Ewok_Slayer like this.
  11. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Chosen One star 6

    Aug 21, 2006
    love his Data-esque behavior and comments about the planets
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  12. Ewok_Slayer

    Ewok_Slayer Jedi Master star 2

    Nov 24, 2004
    Thanks Revanfan1, Nyota's Heart and earlybird-obi-wan for reading. I am having trouble figuring out I-Five's voice in this journal because I believe his internal monologue would be different from what he says to his friends. In other words, I believe he thinks very analytically but often dumbs down his response to sound more human. I also think his teasing of his friends might be more forced than natural...meaning he has to think about it. I need to get him more relaxed like he was in Jax's Journal. I knew I would have a problem with him that is why in the first post I gave him a new (emotional) experience that might explain a change of demeanor ( and by change I mean if I screwed up writing him). o_O

    I am still working out the details in how to portray him. Thanks for taking the time to review! [:D]
    Kahara and Revanfan1 like this.
  13. Chyntuck

    Chyntuck Force Ghost star 5

    Jul 11, 2014
    Man-eating Ewoks? [face_laugh]

    And I-Five becoming more human... I don't see why you're so worried about finding his voice. It sounds to me like you got it just about right :)
    Kahara likes this.
  14. Ewok_Slayer

    Ewok_Slayer Jedi Master star 2

    Nov 24, 2004
    Thank you. I appreciate you taking the time to read and give a review. [:D] I am sure not many people know who I-Five is. I probably won't get many readers for this journal. :(

    Endor has a ton of species on the planet that came up in the comics and I believe there was a TV series. I don't remember ever watching it. I get most of my information from Wookieepedia. Thanks for reading! @};-

    Thanks. The Rebels can hide on Hoth, but this group wants to settle down. So who wants to freeze all the time? Yuck.

    Hey, they were about to make a rump roast out of Luke and Han. :p Thanks for reading!

    Here is a short entry. I still have to think up an adventure.


    Entry 4

    We arrived to Phindar and made landfall in the capital city of Laressa. I believe Jax was disappointed at the condition of the planet’s major populated area. It was a dark and grimy place, littered with trash and inhabited by despondent looking humanoids called Phindians. By despondent, I am not referring to their physical appearance—although they are a gangly species with knurled joints and long, misshapen faces—but to the pessimistic manner which they project. They walk around, eyes downcast, and shuffling about with a melancholy gait.

    According to Jax, these beings were once under the control of a criminal organization called the Syndicat. About thirty years ago the Jedi helped overthrow the Syndicat, but the devastation of decades of cruelty and oppression still haunted the residents.

    There are humans on the planet. They make up approximately three percent of the population and are concentrated in a colony twenty kilometers west of the capital city in a town called Svang. It is a mining town with reportedly all the amenities enjoyed by humans. Jax thought that might be a place worth looking into. Unfortunately the town does not have a spaceport, so we have to take a speeder to the location.

    I decided it was best not to attract attention to myself. Humans were rare and I assume Human Replica Droids are even scarcer. I instead opted to have my droid brain transferred into my Artoo chassis.

    Once inside the Astromech droid I came to realize I really enjoy being in the HRD chassis. When inside the Artoo body it felt like half my senses were cut off. I can see and hear with equal clarity, but my tactile sensations are limited. This droid has pressure sensors on the hull, but nothing like an HRD. In the human chassis I can sense the difference between a light caress and a grasp. The Artoo sensors only indicate something is touching my exterior.

    I can’t smell. My sensors analyze the air, but the actual sensation of smell is not there. I can’t taste and this Artoo body cannot react to stimuli in the same way my human chassis can respond. The lack of sensations is unnerving, for lack of a better word. I do not enjoy being an Artoo unit. Another drawback is my friends once again ignore me. I know it is not intentional, but it happens with an alarming frequency.

    Currently I am perched in the back seat of a rented speeder. Den, Norro and Jax are in the front seats and the two women are in the back of the vehicle with me. Not once have they tried to engage me in conversation. Instead they have rambled on about a myriad of female topics ranging from the changes of the female body during pregnancy to more intimate subjects involving my friend Jax. The latter conversation was spoken in hushed tones but was readily heard by my highly attuned audio sensors.

    At this point I hope the two women don’t remember I am sentient and within earshot. I am positive they did not intend their conversation to be heard by any other occupant in the vehicle.

    I will not record in this journal exactly what was said, but suffice to say, Magash and Sacha have determined Jax is excellent breeding stock with capabilities I find questionable and is in most probability highly exaggerated. If I was capable of rolling my optical sensor I would, but I can’t. That is another drawback to this droid body. Human facial gestures are impossible.

    After a half hour drive we arrived to Svang. It was located in the middle of a tropical forest at the base of a mountain. We were told the ore mines run deep into the foothills. Most humans are miners, but there is a large town servicing the area. As we drove through the small city I observed restaurants, theaters, fuel stations, grocery stores, hotels, and a higher than normal percentage of taverns and cantinas.

    Most of the humans walking on the sidewalks wore heavy overalls covered with dark dust. I did notice there was a very high male to female ratio. In fact I only saw a few women during our drive and I was not the only person to notice this disparity.

    “There’s not many women here,” Sacha pointed out. She didn’t sound happy about that fact. I assume she desired female companions. Den told me when humans become mated couples they are supposed to avoid close companionship with members of the opposite sex. I can see how this could be a distressing for Sacha. Magash is not in the same situation. I assumed she would be enthusiastic about the large amount of potential mates available, but that did not appear to be the case.

    “Way too many men,” Magash whispered to Sacha. “I don’t like it.”

    I was confused over that comment for a couple reasons. First of all, why would an unattached female not desire a wide assortment of possible male companions? Secondly, why was I relieved that she expressed that sentiment? I decided I must be experiencing a glitch in my droid brain due to the switch in chassis.

    “Where are the girls?” Norro moaned. “There were more women in the Slashtown Prison Colony on Despayre!” The young man let his head drop to the back of his seat as he stared to the roof of the speeder. “Please not here. I will never get a girlfriend. I will die a virgin.”

    Jax grinned. “There are a lot of female Phindians.”

    Norro made a choking noise. “I don’t want to appear to be a speciesist but the Phindians are not even close to looking human.” He shook his head sadly. “A near human would be nice.” He grinned. “I wouldn’t mind a Twi’lek, a Zeltron or a Zabrak.” Once he mentioned Zabraks his face blushed bright red before turning to Magash. “I didn’t mean you.” His eyes widened a bit. “Not that you’re not beautiful…I ah…I mean I would like to meet a girl my age.”

    Magash laughed. “Understandable.”

    Norro blew out a breath as he turned and looked out the front windshield for the remainder of the trip.

    “There’s the hotel we booked rooms in.” Jax said as he parked the vehicle in the adjoining parking lot. Once parked, Jax and Den helped me out of the speeder. I detest the poor maneuverability of this droid model and regret my choice of chassis for this trip.

    When the women exited the vehicle I heard a series of whistles and suggestive remarks coming from the men passing by. One bearded human offered the women his mustache as a form of transportation. I assume the male was either deranged or confused because his proposition made no sense. Both women scowled at the stranger and I noticed Jax’s jaw tightened as he glared at the men.

    “Come on, let’s get inside.” Jax ushered us into the hotel lobby where he rented two rooms. “One for the ladies and one for the males.”

    He held out the door passkey to Sacha who pouted. “Can’t we afford one more room?” She pressed closer to Jax who blushed profusely. She wrapped her arms around his waist as she laid her head on his shoulder. “I still have money I saved from my pod racing days. Let’s splurge.”

    Jax looked to his friends sheepishly. “Would you mind if we broke the group up into three rooms?” He glanced at Den. “You, Norro and I-Five can bunk together and I’ll get a separate room for Magash.”

    That sounded like a reasonable compromise, but Magash balked at the suggestion. “I do not wish to sit in a room alone. I will become bored.”

    Jax looked over to me. “How about you and I-Five stay together? He’s has a voice synthesizer. You two can converse with each other if you get bored.”

    At that moment Den grinned wildly and disguised a chuckle as a cough. “Three rooms is fine with me.” He patted Norro on the back. “Norro and I will be fine together.”

    Magash looked to me and shrugged. “That is acceptable. I-Five tells amusing stories.”

    I noticed nobody asked me what I thought about this arrangement. 'I’m just an astromech droid. There would be no reason for me to protest'. That was what I was thinking in a sarcastic internal monolog, but I didn’t say anything out loud. I didn’t want to make a statement that might be misconstrued by Den...who obviously thinks my predicament is very humorous.

    That belief was confirmed as we walked down the corridor on our way to our rooms. He winked at me before humming a tune that I recognize as music said to be ubiquitous to skin-holos. “Bow wow chicha bow wow,” he sung before making a suggestive hip thrust.

    For a second, I considered extending my arc welding arm and shocking my friend. Instead I lowered the volume of my voice synthesizer to the bare minimum and said, “Please stop.”

    Den laughed as he patted the dome of my chassis. “I’m just messing with you.”

    We arrived to the rooms and Jax handed out the keys. “Why don’t we give ourselves a couple hours to relax and freshen up? That sonic shower on the ship just isn’t the same as a long, hot shower.”

    “Or a bubble bath,” Sacha chimed in with a suggestive grin.

    Jax suppressed a smile. “Or a bubble bath.” He looked at his wrist chrono. “Why don’t we meet at the hotel restaurant at 1800 hours?”

    All nodded in agreement and retired to their rooms. As soon as the door closed behind Magash and me she laughed. “I cannot believe Jax only asked for two hours to relax. According to Sacha he can relax all night.”

    I trundled over to a corner of the room as I thought of a response. “That does not sound odd. I was told humans normally rest throughout the night.”

    Magash laughed at my comment. “Your sense of humor is enjoyable.” She shrugged off her jacket and boots. “A hot bath does sound good though.”

    I turned my optical sensor away once I realized she was stripping for a bath. Now I am glad I am in my Artoo body. This chassis does not react to the same stimuli as the HRD body. For that I am thankful.

    I wonder if she would mind if I use the power station and go into sleep mode. I know my circuits could use the rest.
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  15. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Aug 31, 2004
    LOL! Loved the commentary on the disparity of men/women. :eek: Totally understand Norro's "Oh no!" reaction [face_rofl]

    Continually intrigued by the way the others react and interact with I-Five based on which chassis he's in. And I enjoyed his contrasting the effects of being housed in an R2 versus an HRD chassis. LOL for the pros and cons. [face_mischief]
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  16. divapilot

    divapilot Force Ghost star 4

    Nov 30, 2005
    Very funny! I'm enjoying this very much. I immediately picked up the problem with the male to female ratio, and I five's confusion at the creep's suggestive catcall was perfect.

    “Where are the girls?” Norro moaned. “There were more women in the Slashtown Prison Colony on Despayre!” The young man let his head drop to the back of his seat as he stared to the roof of the speeder. “Please not here. I will never get a girlfriend. I will die a virgin.”

    Poor Norro! [face_laugh]
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  17. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Chosen One star 6

    Aug 21, 2006
    fun update with comments about the women and the change in chassis. Don't stay there with only men;)
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  18. Chyntuck

    Chyntuck Force Ghost star 5

    Jul 11, 2014
    Oh my, oh my. I-Five as an R2 unit, trying to roll his optical sensor and thinking of zapping people with his welder... [face_laugh] But the reason he feels so encumbered in this chassis is that he never met Artoo-Deetoo. If he had, he'd know how expressive R2 units can be :p
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  19. Ewok_Slayer

    Ewok_Slayer Jedi Master star 2

    Nov 24, 2004
    I can't remember if he showed preferences in his droid bodies in the profics. I would have to reread them. I would assume he would like the humanoid chassis better since that was what he was used to. I think he likes the HRD chassis because there is so much stimulation for him. It has to be a rush.

    I have sometimes heard men call out to women on the street with rude suggestive remarks. I wonder what percentage of women respond positively to such comments? I am sure their catcalls have little to do with trying to get a date and more about showing off their machismo to their buddies. :rolleyes:

    Norro is around 14 years old. I assume he is starting to notice females and would like to enjoy his freedom to date young ladies.:D

    R2 is expressive, but he never experienced multiple chassis changes. I would think it would be like a colorblind person suddenly being able to experience color. It would be hard to go back to not experiencing the entire spectrum of color.

    Thanks everybody for reading. I think I came up with a little adventure for the group. I hope it turns out alright.

    Entry 5

    Magash and I arrived at the hotel restaurant at 1800 hours where the waitstaff regarded me curiously. Magash told our waiter she was having a business meeting with friends and I would record the proceedings. It appears I have been demoted from Astromech to minute taker.

    We found our party sitting at a corner table. I took a position at the end of the table top next to Magash and Den. Jax and Sacha were looking particularly chipper. It appears they thoroughly relaxed together during our time apart.

    The waiter took the drink orders while my group pored over their menus. It wasn’t until their food orders were taken that Jax got to business. “I haven’t seen any Stormtroopers while on planet. That’s a good thing. But as Norro pointed out this appears to be a heavily male populated town. The main employer is the mining company, although there are probably food and recreation service related jobs available. We do have a ship, therefore we have the ability to work as traders with our main base here.”

    Norro shook his head. “Unless we are using our ship to transport women into this nerf-sausage town, I vote we try some other planet.”

    That comment confused me. I activated my voice synthesizer and said, “I wasn’t aware there was a sausage meat market in Svang.” This remark was greeted with laughter. Magash ran a hand over my silver dome in a friendly gesture. “I enjoy your dry humor.”

    “Thank you.” I wasn’t sure what was so funny. I downloaded from the holonet a complete list of businesses located within Svang and there was no mention of a nerf processing plant.

    Sacha raised her hand slightly. “I do agree with Norro. I will feel uncomfortable if I have to deal with lecherous sleemos every day. The Antarian Rangers were mostly men, but they had manners.”

    Jax was about to say something but a middle-aged man approached our table interrupting our conversation. “Excuse me, I’m looking for my daughter.” He handed a flimsi flier to Jax. “She was visiting me a week ago when she disappeared. There is a 5,000 credit reward for information leading to her safe return.”

    Jax gazed at the flier before he passed it down the table. “We’ll keep an eye out for her, but we only arrived today.”

    The older man gazed at Sacha and Magash. “I would suggest you leave. I think there is a serial killer on the loose that is targeting women. I told my daughter not to come here to visit me, but she is strong-willed.”

    Jax nodded silently while staring at the man intensely. I have noticed Jax exhibits this type of penetrating gaze while manifesting his Force powers. I assume this man’s Force aura is intriguing to him. Jax has a unique Force ability to see ribbons of color and light surrounding a person. Often he can predict the person’s moral character or how that person is connected to others by observing the colors. He told me he once saw darks ribbons surrounding his friend Anakin Skywalker when they were padawans. At the time he was unsure what it meant. Either Anakin would turn to the darkside or his friend would be defeated by evil. I supposed both interpretations are correct.

    “Thank you,” Jax said with a sad smile. “We’ll take your warning to heart. I am sorry about your daughter.”

    The man didn’t have time to answer. A large, angry looking human male came out a side door and stormed over to the bereaved father. “I told you to stay out of my establishment! You’re driving off customers.”

    The brute was probably in his late thirties with jet-black hair and an ugly scar snaking down one side of his face. The irate employee roughly grabbed the man by the back of the collar and yanked him toward the exit.

    When Jax stood and protested the man’s treatment the scarred faced thug let the man go and pointed to the door. He then glared at our group for a long pause before he walked off in a huff.

    Jax sat back down looking uncomfortable. “I think Norro is right. This is not a place for us.” He sighed audibly. “We’ll leave tomorrow.”

    As my group ate, I scrutinized the employees, patrons and events transpiring around me. I saw the ruffian we encounter earlier pop his head out from side office seven times. Each time he spent between three to eight seconds watching our group consume their meal. It happened often enough that I determined the man was actively observing us. I concluded he either suffered from an unusual form of sitophilia or he believed we planned to eat-and-elude (theft by fraud).

    We paid for the meal and retired to Norro and Den’s room to watch a holo. Norro picked a holofilm about pirates. He has developed a fascination with piracy. I believe Jax’s talk of becoming a trader has inflamed the young man’s imagination.

    At the end of the film we went to our respective rooms. Not wanting to intrude on Magash’s privacy, I powered down and slipped into sleep mode almost immediately.

    Entry 6

    At 0247 hours I switched out of sleep mode when my audio sensors detected the sound of our hotel door lock disengaging. I trained my optical sensor toward the room entrance and observed the door slowly open. The corridor hallway was unusually dark but my infrared vision allowed me to distinguish the identity of the intruder as the facially disfigured man from the restaurant. He opened the door a crack and gazed in. Since he obviously held a passkey there was a possibility he was a maintenance worker entering the wrong room. I paused before sounding the alarm.

    “Are you sure this is the room without the male?” Came a voice of a second man.

    “Yes. Both of you get in and keep it quiet.”

    That was all I needed to hear. My voice synthesizer allowed me to vocalize in a modulated tinny voice, but the Artoo chassis also had various alarms, beeps and whistled which I activated simultaneously. “Intruder! Intruder!” I moved from the charging station as two men wearing knitted cold weather masks and night vision goggles entered the dark room. One intruder held what looked like stuncuffs. The second taller man carried a hand cloth possibly to be used as a gag.

    “Kriff! Kytt didn’t say anything about a droid!” one of the men cursed. “Let’s get her and get out.”

    I moved in a trajectory that would intercept the two intruders. My optical sensor was aimed at the men, but I could detect the sound of Magash jumping out of bed. The goggles must induce tunnel vision because one intruder ran directly into my Artoo chassis, smashing his knee before he let out a string of profanity that was impressive in its quantity and multiplicity.

    I heard the rustling sound of unarmed combat and Magash calling out for help. I moved around to the other side of the bed where the two men were struggling to restrain her. One criminal attempted to place a cloth over her face. Because of the amount of noise generated in this tussle I now concluded it might not be a gag, but most likely a paralytic or anesthetic chemically soaked rag. They were intent on incapacitating my friend.

    The men immediately discovered Magash was not an easy woman to abduct. The taller man grabbed her shoulder and was rewarded with an elbow to his nose. There was a spray of blood as he dropped the cloth and fell back a step before he lunged toward Magash again. The other man picked up the rag and tried to shove it over the Dathomiri witch’s face. She slapped the cloth away and managed to bring her knee up into his groin. He screamed before dropping down to his knees and vomiting. Magash then shoved the other man hard enough that he made an indentation on the plaster wall. I was highly impressed by her ability to fight in almost complete darkness. I assume she was using the Force to assist her.

    I was confused as to why reinforcements had not arrived. Jax should be here by now. Eleven-point-six seconds have elapsed since I signaled the alert. There was no way he could sleep through the commotion I was making.

    The taller man struggled to his feet. Deciding to forgo stealth, he unholstered his blaster and shot Magash with a stun bolt. As she slumped to the ground, I lurched forward as fast as I could, cursing the limitations of this droid body. An Astromech was not built for ground combat. I should have brought my HRD body. For the first time ever I wished I were truly human so I could assist Magash in her struggle to drive off these men. The best that I could do was use one of my numerous mechanical arms to distract the invaders. As I neared the man with the blaster I extended my manipulator arm tipped with a circular saw. It was designed to cut through damaged starship hulls, therefore it should easily slice through human skin and bones. I activated the device and jammed the blade into the intruder’s leg. A large gash appeared followed by blood splatter. The masked man screamed before he turned his blaster toward me and fired.

    _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _**********_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
    [System Error] [System Error]

    [System overload]

    <p>Some required information is missing or incomplete. Please correct your entries and try again.</p>

    A problem has been detected and all nonessential systems have been shut down to prevent damage to your droid brain.

    Technical information:

    ****Stop: 0x88403045jr (0duu44950, T5Y330, Hsd777)

    ****Portdls.sys - Address DE8439 base at UFF0438

    There is a problem with this programs security certificate. (Error code: Sec_error_delete_Issuer)

  20. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Chosen One star 6

    Aug 21, 2006
    OH my he is in deep trouble.
    Eager waiting for what happens next
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  21. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Aug 31, 2004
    That was excellent advice, to leave immediately. But I hope it didn't come too late. Yikes, I-5 seems to have malfunctioned and where is Jax or Sacha? Maybe they've been incapacitated too. [face_nail_biting] Maybe this whole abduction racket is really slavers.
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  22. divapilot

    divapilot Force Ghost star 4

    Nov 30, 2005
    Oh no! Now I have to find out what happened to them! Great action scene!
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  23. Revanfan1

    Revanfan1 Force Ghost star 6

    Jun 3, 2013
    Entry 4 is hilarious! Tears! [face_rofl]

    Entry 5 and 6...yikes! Poor Magash and I-Five! What kept Jax and the others, I wonder?
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  24. Chyntuck

    Chyntuck Force Ghost star 5

    Jul 11, 2014
    You *think* you came up with a little adventure? What is it like when you're sure? :p

    Poor I-Five. System malfunction :( And where are the others???? :mad: The only reassuring thing is that, whoever the kidnappers are, with Magash they're in for a helluva ride!
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  25. Ewok_Slayer

    Ewok_Slayer Jedi Master star 2

    Nov 24, 2004
    Yeah, getting shot is never a good thing. :(

    I think I-Five believes his human friends can move a lot quicker than they actually can. If you recall less than 12 seconds had elapsed. That really is not a lot of time for somebody to wake up, figure out there is trouble, and then go to help.

    Thanks! I'm glad you like it.

    Jax and Sacha were a little preoccupied. lol!

    It is a small adventure. But hopefully it will keep your interest.

    Thanks everybody for reading and taking the time to review. I really appreciate it!


    Entry 7

    Three months have passed since my last entry. My droid brain was impaired by a surge of blaster energy. The damaged resulted in irregular and unanticipated changes in my memory. I experienced something similar to psychogenic or dissociative amnesia. There were gaps in my episodic memory and some minor damage to my semantic memory.

    At this time I have fully recovered and will attempt to chronicle the events that occurred immediately after I was hit by the blaster bolt.

    Recovered Entry:

    The blasterbolt jolted me backwards as every alarm in my Artoo body squealed. I managed to remain upright for a moment before my stabilizers failed and I toppled over. I was able to turn my optics to focus on the man whose leg I sliced. He was cursing in a couple languages as he grabbed up the cloth from the floor and pressed it to his wound in an attempt to stop the flow of blood. My belief that the cloth was soaked in a paralytic was confirmed when his injured leg suddenly gave way, dropping him to the floor. The semi-prone man cursed his own stupidity as the other shorter criminal struggled to his feet.

    “Kriff this. I’m not going to jail for a Slaga.” With his hand still clutching his injured testicles he limped out of the room leaving his friend behind to curse him for his cowardice. Shortly after Jax, Sacha entered the room, both in various stages of undress. I guess that explains why it took over twelve seconds for them to arrive. Jax was wearing boxer briefs and brandishing a blaster. Sacha held a small blaster in one hand while using her free hand to hold her bathrobe closed. Den was the next to enter. He had a noticeable knot on his head with blood trickling down from his mouth. Norro stumbled in behind him, floundering around in the dim light.

    Den, having acute night vision, quickly found the room’s light switch and flicked on the lights. The man on the floor screamed before flinging his night-vison goggles off his face. Half blinded from the surge of light, he lifted his weapon blindly searching for a target, but Jax was faster. There was a flash of a blaster bolt and the man collapsed unconscious.

    Jax and Sacha went to aid Magash as Den and Norro helped set me upright. Den looked into my optical sensor concerned. “Power down! We need to contain this damage. Power down and I’ll get us back to the ship for repairs.”

    That is all I remember about the attack.

    Entry 8

    Recovered Entry

    “I-Five, can you hear me?” It was Den’s voice I heard drifting over the blackness. “Can you open your eyes?”

    I forced my eyes open and blinked a few times at the light above me. I raised my head and realized I was lying on a makeshift cot placed on top of two large metallic packing crates. I ran a hand over my face as I tried to recall how I got here. “Where am I?”

    My Sullustan friend was standing on a step stool next to me allowing him a better view of my prone body. He frowned slightly at my question. “We’re inside the Laranth’s cargo bay. What’s the last thing you remember?” I tried to sit up but Den put his hands out to keep me from moving. “Don’t move just yet. I don’t need you falling over and damaging yourself. We don’t have a way to replace that pretty face of yours.”

    I smiled slightly as I returned to a prone position. The last thing I remembered was being in town of Svang. Suddenly the memory of the attempted hotel abduction came flooding back. “Magash!” This time I did sit up. “Is Magash alright?”

    Den steadied me as I swung my legs over the side of the cargo crates. “Yes, thankfully your warning woke everybody up and you and Magash were able to fight off the intruders.”

    I noticed a bruise on Den’s head. “What happened to you?”

    Den brought his hand up to his head. “When I first hear you call out for help I ran out to the corridor and was blaster-whipped by that guy we saw in the restaurant.”

    “The one with the scar.”

    Den nodded. “I got a good look at him despite the fact the corridor lights were disconnected. I was temporarily stunned and almost lost consciousness. I saw a masked man with night vision goggles exit your room. The guy with the scar grabbed his collar and practically dragged him down the corridor. They escaped down the dark hallway as Norro, Jax and Sacha exited their rooms. Jax ran into your room and caught the attacker you injured. The police are looking for the other two men, but haven’t found them yet. We got you back to the ship right away…you were in bad shape.”

    “How long have I been unconscious?”

    Den made a pained expression. “Two days. I was really worried your brain was permanently damaged…but it looks like you are going to be alright.”

    “How’s my brother?”

    “Your brother?” Den’s expression morphed into one of confusion. “Do you mean Jax?”

    Now I was confused. Why did Den say it that way? “Of course, Jax. I only have one brother.”

    He gazed at me for a second before answering. “Jax is fine.” He looked into my eyes before he ran a sensor over my body. “Are you sure you’re alright?”

    “Yes, of course. Is there something wrong?”

    Den shrugged. “I’ve only heard you refer to Jax as your brother a couple times in jest. When you said it just now, it sounded like you really meant it.”

    “What?” I was confused by this conversation and worried that Den’s memory might be impaired by his head injury. “Jax is my brother. He’s my older brother. Lorn Pavan was our father.” I hesitated for a moment. “Are you okay, Den? You sound off.”

    “I’m fine,” he said slowly. He looked to the door and then to me. “I think I’m going to get Jax and the others.” He took a step toward the door before turning around and holding out his arms in a halting gesture. “Don’t get up. I think you are experiencing some memory problems and it might affect other things…like motor function. Don’t move.”

    “Okay.” As my friend left the room I held out my hands and arms looking for injuries. I unbuttoned my tunic and ran a hand over my chest and back. I remember being hit by a blaster, but I didn’t see any injury. I decided it must have been a stunbolt that scrambled my brain.

    My group of friends soon entered the room. All looked happy to see me awake, but there was a hint of concern in their eyes.

    Jax came up and put a hand on my shoulder. “I’m so glad you weren't irreparably damaged.”

    “You mean dead?” I chuckled as I buttoned up my tunic.

    Jax grinned. “If you want to put it that way. I’m glad you aren't dead.”

    Jax moved back to allow Magash to approach. She was wearing a green formfitting body suit that complimented her light red skin. Her silky, shoulder length, black hair was tied back, fully exposing her cranial horns. I am accustomed to her strong stoic veneer, but today she appeared troubled. There was a look of concern in her emerald green eyes as she walked up to me. She brought a hand to my shoulder and squeezed it gently. “I am relieved that you are well. Thank you for your assistance with the attackers. You risked great injury to assist me. You have a warrior’s spirit within you.”

    I flashed a smile. Magash is a ferocious fighter; to be complimented by her is a great honor.

    “You were doing fine until you got stunned.”

    “You warned everybody and protected me after I was rendered unconscious.” She hesitated for a moment before leaning forward and giving me a quick hug. “ You are a good friend.”

    I grinned as a hot blush crossed my face. “You’d do it for me.”

    She nodded in agreement. “Jax told me how you temporarily crippled my attacker with your circular saw. That was an impressive use of the tools at hand.”

    My brow furrowed. I remember cutting the intruder, but for some reason I thought it was with a vibroblade. “A circular saw? Why would I have a circular saw? Wasn't it a vibroblade?”

    Jax shook his head. “You got him with your Artoo circular saw manipulator arm.”

    I starred at Jax perplexed; this conversation was becoming surreal. “I don’t understand? I had an Artoo unit with me?”

    All of my friends went silent and turned to each other their expressions a mixture of fear and confusion. Jax returned his hand to my shoulder and gazed into my eyes. “I-Five, you were inside your Artoo chassis. It was damage, so we transferred you to this body.”

    “What?” That was all I could think to say. I had no idea what my brother was getting at. “What are you talking about?”

    Jax glanced to Den and then to the others. When his gaze returned to me his face was pale. He had the look of a man who grudgingly had to deliver bad news to a family member.

    “I-Five, you do know you’re a droid, don’t you?”

    I stared at Jax slack jawed. I wasn’t sure what type of joke this was, but I didn’t find it funny. I looked down at my hands—my human hands—as I shook my head with a dry laugh. “Whose idea was it to mess with me when I woke up?” I turned to Den. “Was it you?”

    The diminutive alien shook his head, his black eyes wide with apprehension. “I-Five you are a droid. A sentient droid, but still a droid.”

    “No.” I was going to say something else, but a memory trickled up in the back of my mind as if the truth was trying desperately to resurface. A recollection of a protocol droid appeared for a second, but then quickly vanished. I turned to Jax, my voice taking on a desperate tone. “I remember growing up with our father and you going to the Temple. He was heartbroken.”

    Jax ran a hand through his hair before reaching back and massaging his neck. “I-Five, my father purchased you at a junk yard. You were a badly damaged protocol droid. He tried to repair you, but he did something wrong…or maybe something right. He disabled your creative dampeners during your refurbishing. As the years progressed you started to learn and think for yourself and eventually you became sentient.”

    I shook my head angrily. I thrust out my hands. “Stop saying that! Look at me!” I flexed my hands. “I’m human. I’m not a protocol droid.” I pulled in a deep breath. “I can breathe!”

    “You are currently in a human replica droid chassis,” Den explained. “It’s made to mimic a human body exactly. It even has mock organs to fool medical scanners.”

    “I am not a droid!” I was becoming increasingly alarmed by this discussion. What was going on? I remember being shot in the hotel. Was I in a medically induced coma and currently dreaming? “Droids don’t have emotions and they can’t feel fear or love. If I’m a droid why do I have these sensations?” My voice cracked with overwhelming emotion, but for some reason the tears did not come.

    “Oh, I-Five.” It was Sacha’s sad voice. She looked brokenhearted as she walked up and pulled me into her embrace and rested her head on my shoulder. She was sniffling and soon I felt her tears soaking through my tunic. “I-Five, you feel love, because you are loved.” She leaned back and gave me a sad smile. “You’re something more than a droid. You are self-aware and capable of learning what it is to be human. And you are our friend. I don’t know what happened to you, but we’ll get through this together.”

    I didn’t want to have this conversation. I am not a droid! I am a man. My friends are either pulling a horrible practical joke on me or they’ve all gone barvy. That must be it. They experienced their own brain injuries during the fight and are now delusional. I can’t be a droid. I remember doing things. I have a life and friends and desires. I can’t be a droid! An uncomfortable sensation washed over me as my eyes began to flutter and my body began to shake uncontrollably.

    I heard Den call out, “That looks like shock.”

    Jax came up to me and helped me back down to a prone position. “Is that possible?”

    “Input overload?” Den ventured.

    “What do we do?” The sound of fear and concern in Magash’s voice made me even more frightened. Was I dying?

    “I-Five calm down.” Jax looked to Den. “Can we disable him?”

    “His droid brain has a deactivation override. He has to put himself into a sleep mode.”

    Jax looked over me. “I-Five, go into a sleep mode.”

    “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I cried out in terror. “What’s going on?!”

    Magash came up to me and laid her hands on my chest allowing me to feel the calming warmth of her fingers through my tunic. “Just go to sleep,” she said softly. “Close your eyes and relax. You are among friends. We are here for you.”

    Her voice was calm and soothing; slowly my shivering subsided. “Close your eyes,” she repeated. I closed my eyes and tried to will myself to sleep. I heard the sound of people leaving the room and hushed conversations in the outer corridor. Magash remained behind, her soft voice comforting me. “I will stay here with you. Please sleep, my friend.” I reached up and placed my hand over hers as a small nervous smile touched my lips.

    “Thank you.” I released her hand and let my arms drop to my side. I don’t know how they expected me to sleep when I've just woken up to a nightmare, but eventually the impossible happened…I drifted off into a deep slumber.
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