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Saga Devil on my Shoulder - Obi-Wan, Palpatine, dialogue-only piece

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Eryndil, Jan 24, 2013.

  1. Eryndil

    Eryndil Jedi Knight star 3

    Dec 18, 2012
    Devil on my Shoulder

    Summary: Two mentors guide Anakin through his years as a Jedi. Dialogue-only piece.
    Spoilers: All 3 prequel films
    Disclaimer: All existing copyrights remain the property of their respective owners and I make no claim to them. This story contains elements created by George Lucas. They are used for non-profit-making purposes only.

    A/N: The title refers to the image of an angel on one shoulder and a devil on the other. It's always easier to listen to what you want to hear (though maybe not what you need to hear). The last three sections are quoted from Revenge of the Sith.


    "You will be a Jedi, Anakin, but the path will not be easy. A Jedi's life is one of service and sacrifice. If this is what you choose, I will be here to guide you and teach you what you need to know."

    "You are a hero, Anakin, and I hope the Jedi Order truly appreciates you. I can see that you will be very powerful and some people may fear that. Others will be jealous but I am sure that your master will understand how special you are. Remember that I am always here if you need to talk."

    "You must be patient, Padawan. The Force is strong in you but now you must learn to control it and to control yourself. If you cling to your anger and fear, they will lead you to a dark place. I will show you how to release your emotions into the Force and find your calm centre."

    "Yes, the Jedi believe that you must release your emotions, but sometimes I wonder if that is a good thing. After all, love is an emotion - you love your mother don't you, my child? So how can that be wrong? Even anger can come from a good place, from caring about other people. The Jedi grow up in such a sterile atmosphere, they don't understand these things the way I do."

    "I know you are frustrated, Padawan, but you are still very young and you have much to learn. You are very powerful so you must be especially careful. Such power used the wrong way could cause great destruction and suffering. With time, you will learn better control."

    "Of course I understand, my boy. You feel that they are holding you back and that makes you frustrated. I'm sure that your master means well. He is right, you are very powerful, and that must worry him. I'm not suggesting that he is jealous, but your powers far surpass his and that can't be easy for him. I do hope that he appreciates your potential."

    "You are learning quickly, Anakin, and I see that you will be a great Knight one day. But you should not be over-confident or you will make mistakes. You cannot rush blindly into situations without thinking first. Follow my lead and curb your impatience or it will get you into trouble...again."

    "So your master says you are impatient. Well, I can see why he thinks that - he was ever cautious. A prudent tendency, no doubt, but is it always the best way, I wonder? I have often found that bold moves achieve the fastest results. You want to resolve a situation quickly, before it deteriorates, and you should be applauded for that. Ah well, I'm sure your master will understand that in time."

    "You have progressed well, my young Padawan, and your lightsaber skills are excellent, although not as good as Master Yoda's yet, whatever you may say. But you must remember to stay calm and focused when you fight. A Jedi never strikes in anger - that way leads to the dark side and you don't want to start down that path, Anakin."

    "I don't think you should worry about your anger, my boy. You are wise enough - and strong enough - not to let it control you. You have become a very powerful young man and your abilities are truly astounding. I am surprised that you have not been made a Knight yet, but I am sure that won't be long now. The Council will see what I have seen, unless they are fools."

    "I am so sorry about your mother, Anakin. I know how much she meant to you and her loss must be very painful for you. But she is at peace now, one with the Force. Try to remember that. If you can release your grief into the Force, it will bring you comfort."

    "I am so sorry about your mother, Anakin. It's such a shame you were not able to go to her sooner or this tragedy may have been prevented. I understand how painful it was for you and how angry you must have felt at those who were responsible. You must not blame yourself for striking out at the Sand People, it's natural to want revenge, whatever the Jedi say."

    "Now you are a Knight, Anakin, and I am proud to have travelled with you on this journey. There will be difficult times ahead and you will face many challenges, but I have faith in you. Trust in the Force and it will guide you always."

    "So, at last they have made you a Knight, and not before time. I was beginning to wonder if the Council would ever give you the recognition you deserve. Now you can make your own choices and everyone will see what I have seen from the start. Trust in your powers, Anakin, and you will be truly great."

    "This war has placed a terrible burden on us all and you have seen more death and suffering than a young man of your age ever should. I know that you still struggle with your anger but you must not let it control you. I will do all I can to help you if you let me. I am no longer your master, but I will always be your friend."

    "This war is terrible and I will do everything in my power to end it. The Senate has shown great trust in me and for that I am grateful, but I fear the same cannot be said of the Jedi Council. As long as this war continues, we will need heroes like you to fight for justice and truth. But I know how difficult this is for you. I only hope that we can soon bring peace... and bring you back to Coruscant."

    "You saved my life for the eighth time (I'm not counting that business on Cato Neimoidia). I'm glad to have you by my side, even if you are the one who gets me into these scrapes in the first place. But you are still very reckless, my friend, and you shouldn't risk your life - or the mission - to rescue me. I'd rather not lose you after all those years training you. No, Anakin, I am not 'getting sentimental in my old age.'"

    "I hear that you saved Master Kenobi's life again. He's very fortunate to have you looking out for him. And for your sake, Anakin, I am glad you did not lose him as you lost your mother. I know how much you fear for those you love. It is only natural that you want to protect them from harm."

    "You have come so far since we first met and you will go much further yet. But remember that you are still young, and have more to learn - as do we all, Anakin. Yes, I know I have a tendency to lecture, but I only want what is best for you. We have been through much together and you are like a brother to me. I suppose that could be seen as a fault since attachment is forbidden to Jedi. Well, you see I also have much to learn."

    "You have come very far, young man, and I foresee great things for you. It's a pity that the Jedi Council don't give you the chance to prove yourself. It seems they don't trust you. Well, you know why that is, of course: they fear your power and your friendship with me. If they could, they would sever your attachment to anyone and anything outside the Order. I sometimes wonder if the Jedi have lost touch with the people they claim to serve."

    "You are strong and wise, Anakin, and I am proud of you. I have trained you since you were a small boy; I have taught you everything I know, and you have become a far greater Jedi than I could ever hope to be. But be patient, Anakin. It won't be long before the Council makes you a Jedi Master."

    "You must break through the fog of lies the Jedi have created around you. Let me help you to know the subtleties of the Force. Only through me can you achieve a power greater than any Jedi. Learn to know the dark side of the Force, Anakin, and you will be able to save your wife from certain death."

    "You were my brother, Anakin. I loved you."
    zjq, Kahara, Findswoman and 2 others like this.
  2. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Aug 31, 2004
    Nice bit of paralleling/contrasts there. The Devil indeed :p
  3. obimom

    obimom Jedi Master star 4

    Oct 31, 2010
    This was so good! It deserves more notice!!
  4. Alexis_Wingstar

    Alexis_Wingstar Jedi Master star 4

    Sep 16, 2006
    Too bad Anakin could not see the love Obi-Wan had for him. *Sigh*

    Great piece. The last part gave me chills, and reminded me of the first time I saw RoTS.
  5. Valairy Scot

    Valairy Scot Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Sep 16, 2005
    What an excellent piece - it truly deserves more reviews! You really wove those lines well. Well done.
  6. Valiowk

    Valiowk Chosen One star 6

    Apr 23, 2000
    You captured excellently how everything that Obi-Wan said and did was because he hoped Anakin could become the best Jedi he was capable of becoming. =D= A pity that Anakin never realised that not only was there a devil on his shoulder, there was once an angel too.
    Jedi Knight Fett likes this.
  7. devilinthedetails

    devilinthedetails Fiendish Fanfic & SWTV Manager, Interim Tech Admin star 6 Staff Member Administrator

    Jun 19, 2019
    Great job with this story. I could really hear both Obi-Wan and Palpatine hovering over Anakin's shoulders in a sense as sort of an angel and devil respectively. A very clever concept to make it a story only told through dialogue so that we can really hear the voices of these two characters as they each try to influence Anakin, for good or for ill, in their own ways. Very smooth integration of movie dialogue into the larger flow of the story you've written, and the last line gave me chills. Thanks for sharing this piece with us all!
  8. Findswoman

    Findswoman Fanfic and Pancakes and Waffles Mod (in Pink) star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Feb 27, 2014
    Ooh, this is quite an intriguing juxtaposition! What a thought-provoking and innovative format for exploring all three of these characters—Obi-Wan, Palpatine, and Anakin, because it really is like a character study of all of them. I can clearly hear the voices of both mentor characters, and of course this kind of pull between "angel and devil" influence is so very characteristic of Anakin—he feels it at each of the main life events outlined here, and I would say it continues into the OT, too. Thanks so much for sharing, and add me to the list of those who are glad to have come across this! =D
    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha likes this.