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Before - Legends Before the Saga Intruders - Xenobiology Challenge Response - Tara, Davin (OCs)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Kit', Jul 2, 2021.

  1. Kit'

    Kit' Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Oct 30, 1999
    Title: Intruders
    Author: Kit'
    Timeframe: 59 BBY
    Characters: Jedi padawanTara Tarindae and Jedi Master Davin Dor
    Genre: Adventure
    Summary: Everyone remembers their first pet, but what if you live on a starship and your pet dreams are bigger than what the ship can carry?
    Notes: This is in response to @gizkaspice's awesome Xenobiology challenge. It only took four months but I finally got here!
  2. Kit'

    Kit' Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Oct 30, 1999
    The heavy machinery had almost caused as much destruction in their roll down the steep hillside as they had carving their path through the forest. Now they lay steaming and creaking at the bottom of the gorge.

    Davin watched his padawan as she stood panting from the effort of tipping the giant machines over. Around him, the warm currents of the Force ebbed and flowed. He could feel the passionate heat of his padawan mixed with the swirling eddies of life force that were slowly draining from the flattened trees.

    It had been her idea of course. It was always her idea. See a problem. Solve the problem.

    The only issue was that for his padawan any injustice was a problem. Even if it would create more issues for others, or the Council or even for herself, she’d still throw her entire being into solving it.

    Davin grinned at her, bemused at the frown on her face as she glared at the bulldozers that lay below them.

    “Did you sufficiently slay the monsters, oh padawan of mine?” he asked, letting his amusement seep into his voice.

    “Very funny Master, I just don’t like seeing the destruction of the ecosystem for no good reason.”

    “I do believe that Dorvalla Mining owns rights to this land.”

    “Paying money to bribe people in the Senate isn’t exactly ethical.”

    “You have no evidence of that, padawan mine,” Davin said and then grinned harder when he was rewarded with a scowl and a raised eyebrow.

    “I did my research before we came, Master, like a good archivist. This is four hundred klicks outside the area they purchased. I do believe that makes this trespassing and therefore illegal.”

    “I don’t believe anyone lives here padawan, so who would they be trespassing against?”

    Tara shrugged and her eyes narrowed. There was a swift flicker of passionate anger through the Force before it was carried away by cooler currents.

    “Because if they are allowed to do that, then what will stop them from advancing further? This planet’s ecosystem is already vulnerable and mining will only make it worse.”

    Davin gave a low chuckle.

    “I see that talk about taking your studies more seriously didn’t fall on deaf ears then.”

    She wrinkled her nose at him. “More that I didn’t want you to look like a sulky fathier foal if I didn’t.”

    He went to reply, but was interrupted by the crunch of sticks and dead foliage from behind them. He whipped around, lightsaber in his hand. Tara’s lightsaber thrummed to life beside him. Davin internally cursed himself for being so involved in the banter with his padawan that he hadn’t felt the change in the eddies of the Force that would have alerted him to the newcomer’s presence.

    From the edge of the forest, a group of Fosh stepped forward. Their plumage was striking in its beauty, a mass of delicate blues and purples that shimmered green in the afternoon light.

    “Why are you here human?” The tallest Fosh asked, its eyes narrowing in suspicion. “This is not your fight.”

    After a second of silence, Davin realised his normally precocious padawan had chosen this moment to finally learn to be quiet. Davin motioned with his hand and Tara’s blade switched off. He returned his own lightsaber to his belt and then raised an eyebrow. “We were travelling through the area. We didn’t realise anyone lived here.”

    The Fosh’s delicate feathers ruffled at the words.

    “I suppose, to you off-worlders nobody does,” it replied grimly. “Some would prefer to keep that thought alive.”

    From somewhere in the gorge there was the sound of twisted metal groaning. Davin noticed how the Fosh’s plumage shimmered from green to grey at the noise.

    “The miners are gone,” Tara said almost defiantly, “we took care of that.”

    Davin raised his eyebrow at his padawan’s precociousness and tensed himself for the Fosh’s reply. Instead the Avian ignored both of them as it surveyed the destruction the machines had caused.

    “They will be back,” the creature said after a moment, “bigger and better armed. This is not their first trespass, nor do I believe it will be their last.” It rounded on Tara, “Will you be here when they return? Will you keepsafe the rest of the forest, even though no-one lives there either?”

    Davin stepped in front of his padawan, making the Fosh take a step back. It drew its shoulders up to protect its neck, and watched them carefully.

    “A Jedi will do what they must to protect those less capable of protecting themselves,” he said, desperately hoping the platitude would be enough. “We are supposed to be observers here, nothing more.”

    “And what have you observed human?”

    Davin was definitely not an expert in Avian body language, but he could have sworn that the Fosh was baiting him.

    “Firstly, those who don’t live here should take care of themselves.”

    Another ruffle of plumage, this time a longer and brighter shimmer of green. Davin made a note to read up on Fosh when they returned to the Temple, the change in feather colour had to mean something.

    “Your child said something about trespassing,” the older Fosh said quietly, still guarding its neck. “Do you have permission to be here?”

    “From those who don’t live here? That would be hard to get, would it not?” Davin asked with a smile. Then he sobered as he noticed the tiny ripple of green to grey on the Fosh’s feathers. “If we had known we would have asked. We were just travelling through though. We are Jedi Archivists, seekers of knowledge if you like.”

    “And yet you carry weapons,” the Fosh’s thin, talon-like fingers gestured towards Davin’s weapon. The Jedi shrugged.

    “Protection. For all the talk in the Universe, the stylus is definitely not mightier than the sword.” There was another short silence and Davin felt like he was being weighed and measured by his counterpart. “We can go another way, if you so desire. My padawan, Tara, found a lead on an old Jedi Temple that used to exist here millenia ago. We figured we’d trek and find out. We are happy to wait though, if permission is required.”

    The creature nodded as if considering the situation and then turned to the rest of its groups and spoke rapidly in what Davin assumed was Fosh. Davin carefully kept his expression neutral, hands relaxed and loose by his sides. Eventually the Fosh turned back to him, regarding him down the length of its beak.

    “I am Cinnris.”

    “Davin Dor,” Davin said with a slight bow, “my padawan, Tara Tarindae.”

    “You may proceed to the ruins. My chicklet Niidae will take you.” He motioned towards a younger member of the group.

    Davin bowed again. “You do us a great honour. Let us know what we can do in return.”

    “The intruders.” Cinnris said sharply. “What will the Jedi do about them?”

    Davin smiled.

    “I believe my padawan will organise something with both the Jedi Temple and the Senate to remedy this situation.”

    He turned to Tara, just in time to see her look of confusion.

    “Master? I’m too young. They won’t listen to me.”

    He grinned.

    “Then you’ll have to find a way of making them listen,” Davin advised. “I’m sure you can do it.”

    From the valley below came the muffled sound of an explosion and ping of hot metal.

    “Maybe,” Davin said grinning, “you can try pushing their speeders over. I’ve heard that destroying someone’s vehicle is an excellent trick if you need to get people’s attention.”
    gizkaspice and Seldes_Katne like this.
  3. Thumper09

    Thumper09 Force Ghost star 4

    Dec 9, 2001
    Great job! Looks like Tara has a bit of a project ahead of her now, but if she jumps all-in on that too, she'll probably have the entire continent declared a protected area in no time. :)

    I like how you depicted the Fosh here with their unique physiology and mannerisms. I also liked how the reader was able to learn about them and interpret their words and actions along with Davin as he tried to navigate the social aspects of the meeting with a species he's unfamiliar with.

    Great work! =D=
    gizkaspice likes this.
  4. gizkaspice

    gizkaspice Force Ghost star 4

    Nov 27, 2013
    OMG, forest Fosh! :D:D What a surprise for Davin and Tara to come across this rarely seen species and the environmentalism theme is strong with this story. It's gonna give Avatar a run for its money.

    And yeah, I agree with @Thumper09 how you got the Fosh to a T. You did such a great job at fleshing out this species and I'm looking forward to more! Also, great response to the challenge. =D=
    Jedi Knight Fett likes this.
  5. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Chosen One star 6

    Aug 21, 2006
    Great story with action to protect and meeting the Fosh
  6. Seldes_Katne

    Seldes_Katne Force Ghost star 3

    Mar 18, 2002
    Really enjoyed this short piece, between the environmental protection theme and meeting a non-human native species. I appreciate the respect the Jedi immediately show the Fosh, asking permission to travel the forest and thanking them for assigning a guide. Even though I'm not familiar with your OCs, there was more than enough character development and background given. Here's hoping Padawan Tara Tarindae succeeds in her new mission with the Senate.

    Nicely done!
    Kit' likes this.