Story [LOTR: Rings of Power] Table Talk (Durin IV, Disa) humor/romance once shot

A/N: Tag to LOTR: Rings of Power S1, Ep 5.
Prompt: the table is installed in its new home underground.
Minor Spoilers for Episode 5

Table Talk

As Durin and his men approached the gates of his home, Khazhad Dum, he mused that Disa ears already burned with word of the ornament he brought her. But it was his tongue that quivered at the thought of sharing the tale by which he obtained it.

Though the elaborate pulley system they employed made mining more efficient, there was still no speedy way by which to deliver the table to his wife. She had not come to meet him, which was fair. She was his queen, and a capable one at that. She would see it, in time, and she would marvel and she would plant a kiss on his doubly, triply-folded beard. He would beam, as much as prince should, and return to the business at hand, the mining of sacred ore.

Dinner time approached quickly, and, as Disa chased the children to prepare, Durin instructed the men to replace the previous table and store the original for safe keeping. He watched as the first table was undressed, and lifted from hits legs. Grunts resounded in the hall as the men lifted and marched away with their heavy load.

Durin was not a vain prince, but he sat in his chair at the head of the now empty space, regarding the six stone legs that would hold the new table.

“Waiting to served, are you?” Disa said, entering the dining room, radiant and resplendent, in formal attire.

“Just making sure everything is perfect for you, my dearest,” Durin replied, in earnest. “I would not want it off center or uneven or showing the slightest smudge of Elven indulgence. That would not do.”

“It certainly would not,” his wife replied. “I worry how you eat when you are with them. Indulgence seems an exaggeration. Are they not only leaf eaters and consumers of the bounty of the earth? How indulgent can they be?”

“You are not far from the truth, but they take their fair share from the sea.”

Approaching him directly, through the stumpy stone legs, she sat on his lap. “Will they be back soon?”

Looking up into Disa’s golden brown eyes, he replied: “I prefer they delay a while. ‘Tis been too long since I’ve seen my wife.”

She leaned down and kissed his cheek. “A husband returning home after a long journey bearing such a gift might be expecting somethin’. Something more than a kiss.”

With a mischievous glint in his eye and a loving grin, he replied: “He might.”

The shuffling of feet could be hear in the outer hall. More grunting, though not in pain.

“Come in!” Disa called. “It is past time to set the table for supper!”

The outer door swung open slowly and nine of the stoutest dwarves marched in with glorious new table between them. Disa rose as they approached and stood next to her husband. She watched in silent awe as the slab was set into place and secured. The color was stunning. The shine was glorious. It was a magnificent gift. Her eyes welled as she turned to Durin.

“Aww, what is all that about?” Durin said, taking her hand. “You’ve been nagging me or years for a new table. It just so happens this fell right into my lap. It only took a few pointed words at ol’ Gil-Galad to bring it home to you.”

“What did you say to him?” Disa asked.

“I might have implied that stone is rare; so rare that we only use it for monuments and tombs.”

Disa laughed out loud and did not stop for a good long time.

“Rare it is, but not as dramatic as all that!” Disa bellowed. “Quite a ruse on the King of Elves, with which we have a fragile alliance.”

“It was a calculated risk, Deary,” Durin replied. “One I would make again to please my queen. And to get one over on the Elves!”

“Perhaps, that was you main motive?” Disa poked.

“Never. You are first in my heart. Forever and always. But why not take the opportunity to kill two trolls with one stone…table.”

“I think it would be good for you to stop talking, now, Durin, Son of Durin,” she said, raising an eyebrow.

“The troll thing was too much wasn’t it?” he said, a tinge of worry in his tone.

“Let’s just say that gift you were expecting in return has been delayed. But, it’s still on its way.”

 

Oh ho, charming glimpse into the dwarven halls! And into dwarven relationships. The table sounds magnificent.

 

@brodiew All I have to say is and SQUEE! Wonderful bit of teasing mixed with affection. Your gift with humorous dialogue is still oomphy!