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  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Senate Mental Health Support Thread

Discussion in 'Community' started by poor yorick, Oct 6, 2018.

  1. A Chorus of Disapproval

    A Chorus of Disapproval Head Admin & TV Screaming Service star 10 Staff Member Administrator

    Registered:
    Aug 19, 2003
    Evan, there is nothing worse. It really can be much more challenging to mourn the loss of an animal than a person because there really is a much more tangible sense of unconditional love between an animal and its human than between us and other people. She had an incredible run and that's a lot of years of good. Hang in there. I will let a local bird **** on me in her honor.
     
  2. solojones

    solojones Chosen One star 10

    Registered:
    Sep 27, 2000
    Evan, first off you ARE a good friend and I wish I didn't now live 1800 miles away so I could give you a hug. Losing any pet is terrible, let alone one you've had for what, 18 years? You definitely deserve to vent here or anywhere.
     
  3. Darkslayer

    Darkslayer #2 Sabine Wren Fan star 7

    Registered:
    Mar 26, 2013
    My condolences @Darth Guy. The prospect of losing my pet terrifies me as they function as our emotional destressors on a daily basis. I will pray for you.

    I can relate to you and Sinre a bit. My parents' dog Bogey just turned 16 in November and for years has been the thing holding our family together in a lot of ways. We got him when I was in middle school. My parents thought they might "put him down" when he couldn't get up to greet the trick-or-treaters on Halloween (one of his favorite days of the year). That was a terrible day.

    Thankfully since then we've switched vets, gotten him put on a new treatment for his arthritis that's given him relief, and the holidays gave him a renewed energy burst. He kept getting in trouble for trying to unwrap Christmas presents early, which at this stage we are all laughing at and celebrating :p

    Between that and my grandparents being in their 90s, I've definitely felt a sense of impending doom that I've been blessedly shielded from most of my life.
     
    Last edited: Jan 3, 2024
  4. Lady_Belligerent

    Lady_Belligerent Queen of the RPF, SWC, C&P, and Pancakes & Waffles star 10 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Jan 29, 2008
    @Darkslayer I’m in that boat too. One of my boys is 15 and he’s so precious to me. He’s the first one to pick up on when I’m upset or in any kind of pain. He even saved me when I first adopted him. A neighbor’s big Shephard came at me stealth from behind and was on top of me attacking. My guy fought him off of me and fought back. My little man is 15 lbs, but he was my hero that night. The same dog tried it again a couple of years later and Oyster was right there fighting to protect me.

    I’m dreading the day he’s no longer with me.
     
  5. Ghost

    Ghost Chosen One star 8

    Registered:
    Oct 13, 2003
    I'm sorry for your loss. My dog for basically my whole adult life (from 19 to 33) passed away a few days before Christmas last year. Pets are family. At least like with mine, it seems it was peaceful and quick.
     
  6. Harpua

    Harpua Chosen One star 9

    Registered:
    Mar 12, 2005
    @Darth Guy - I am so sorry to hear about you losing your pet. I know how devastating that is. We lost our cat and both rats within the same year. I wish there was more I could say to comfort you, just know that I feel for you and hope you are doing okay, considering.
     
  7. Master_Lok

    Master_Lok Force Ghost star 6

    Registered:
    Dec 18, 2012
    Sending you big gentle hugs and my condolences @Darth Guy

    You gave Luna so much love and a beautiful life & home. I hope you can find some comfort in your memories of Luna. I am so sorry for your loss. [:D]
     
  8. grd4

    grd4 Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Dec 11, 2013
    I mourned my dog longer, and more intensely, than nearly any human relative. With Beau, there were no conflicted feelings. No betrayals or insults. Just ten pounds of joy. Hell, if anything could sway me from agnosticism to benign theism, it would be the very conceit of animal companionship. A pet may very well be the most perfect facet to existence.

    My condolences, DarthGuy. If your posts are any indication, you're a mensch.
     
  9. SHAD0W-JEDI

    SHAD0W-JEDI Force Ghost star 4

    Registered:
    May 20, 2002
    There is a saying along the lines of "The perfect is the enemy of the good", and i took that to mean that at times we struggle so much to find "the perfect" thing -- in this case, the perfect thing to say - and thus don't just say SOMETHING. I find myself in that spot here, so let me just say... So so so sorry for your loss. The love and companionship of a pet is, truly, a unique and special thing, and unfortunately that means we feel their loss in a unique and specially intense way too. My heart goes out to you.
     
  10. Darth Guy

    Darth Guy Chosen One star 10

    Registered:
    Aug 16, 2002
    Thank you, everyone. Sorry for not replying sooner; I've been having a hard time. For example, on the vet's recommendation (to simulate her natural environment and prevent respiratory infection) I had been taking Luna with me every time I took a shower at home for, oh, about the past decade. She loved the steam. So it's really tough doing that routine task without her and I've gone so far as to skip it a few times. I'm sorry to everyone else who's dealing with a loss or dreading one. Living loved ones, cats, cannabis, and most especially joking around on the internet have helped a bit.
     
    Last edited: Jan 9, 2024
  11. Harpua

    Harpua Chosen One star 9

    Registered:
    Mar 12, 2005
    Cats and cannabis have gotten me through some ****ing times.
     
  12. Harpua

    Harpua Chosen One star 9

    Registered:
    Mar 12, 2005
    Speaking of... here they are at six weeks, and at one year.


    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]
     
  13. Rogue1-and-a-half

    Rogue1-and-a-half Manager Emeritus who is writing his masterpiece star 9 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Nov 2, 2000
    @Darth Guy So sorry to hear about Luna. Others have already said all there is to say. Just know my thoughts are with you.

    @Ghost , I'm also very sorry to hear about your loss. I remember seeing your dog over the years in the Pet Picture thread. Always seemed very sweet and fun.

    Pets are family and the grief is real. Love your animals while you have them. They give so much and ask for so little in return.
     
  14. grd4

    grd4 Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Dec 11, 2013
    Dogs and doobies will surely be mine. :)
     
  15. Harpua

    Harpua Chosen One star 9

    Registered:
    Mar 12, 2005
    Reefer and rats have helped me through as well.
     
    grd4, Darth Guy and solojones like this.
  16. Lady_Belligerent

    Lady_Belligerent Queen of the RPF, SWC, C&P, and Pancakes & Waffles star 10 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Jan 29, 2008
    Truth.
     
  17. grd4

    grd4 Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Dec 11, 2013
    We'll just support each other until someone inevitably types, "Ganja and grizzlies." Then the Werner Herzog-inspired interventions come.
     
    Last edited: Jan 11, 2024
  18. Harpua

    Harpua Chosen One star 9

    Registered:
    Mar 12, 2005
    The babies are getting big.

    I got them registered as ESAs... they totally are, too. I raised some loving and loyal creatures. They totally love each other too. I mean, they've been together their whole lives, and it shows.

    [​IMG]
     
  19. Jedi Ben

    Jedi Ben Chosen One star 9

    Registered:
    Jul 19, 1999
    You have the most camera-savvy moggies.
     
    Harpua and Lady_Belligerent like this.
  20. Harpua

    Harpua Chosen One star 9

    Registered:
    Mar 12, 2005
    My journey was similar to this, but I think I finally found the correct combination of meds. I feel better than I have in years, maybe the best I've ever felt. I have bad days, of course.... everybody does, but in general, I am doing well.

    [​IMG]
     
  21. Lady_Belligerent

    Lady_Belligerent Queen of the RPF, SWC, C&P, and Pancakes & Waffles star 10 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Jan 29, 2008
    @Harpua that’s total accuracy!

    I’m glad you’ve found the right combination.
     
    Harpua likes this.
  22. grd4

    grd4 Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Dec 11, 2013
    Disclaimer: This is mostly a post intended for lurkers, since everyone here is acutely aware of how vital therapy and counseling is to bolstering mental health.

    I was on the verge of a complete collapse throughout large portions of last year. I fell madly in love for the first time in many years (too many not to engender embarrassment), to the most luminescent woman I'd ever met. I honestly believed she was "the one": beautiful, effusive, sweet, and fiercely intelligent. Yet as the weeks progressed, I came to the horrific realization that the woman in question had more red flags than Leningrad. A non-medicated bipolar, anorexic, alcoholic, to be specific. After finding myself on the receiving end of a bizarre, emotionally abusive episode, I deliberated for the longest 24 hours of my life and ended the relationship. She accused me of abandonment and betrayal, promptly jumped to another man, while I was left in torment for months.

    Rationally, I knew I did the right thing; and there was a small army of relatives and close friends who assured me as much. But the guilt, sorrow, and profound loneliness plunged me into the second depression of my life. A three-week relationship left me in ruin for eight months. I would break down and cry several times a week, and despite everyone's constant assurances that I'd be a "catch" for any woman, I felt cursed by the universe. That I'd never experience a stable, tender romance. Despite all the good I tried to do in my life, for all the joy I fostered in others, I just wanted to die. Suicidal ideation abounded.

    Then I got help. I went to a therapist. And her probing allowed me to understand that not only had I, in fact, done the right thing in leaving my ex, but that she sabotaged the relationship. If she wanted to keep me, she would never have smuggled tequila in a water bottle. She'd have maintained open communication instead of shutting me out. More importantly, she'd have sought both counseling and pharmacology (if not merely for herself, then for the people who cared for her).

    My psychologist ushered me to a breakthrough. I realized that in leaving a chaotic, emotionally abusive woman, I performed the kindest, bravest act of self-care in my life. For once, I refused to suffer for someone else's sake. That, for whatever my flaws, I was worth more than a roller-coaster ride to Hell. My doctor truly helped unburden me. And though the Black Dog still trails me, I've made it my aim for 2024 to be a year of healing and restoration. I hope to Christ I fall in love again, but in any case, I'm determined to move forward.

    So please, to those who feel hopeless: Please, please utilize every resource available to get help. Don't suffer alone, or in silence. Surround yourself with people who love you, and seek guidance from professionals. You're worth saving.
     
    Jedi Ben, Lordban, Harpua and 5 others like this.
  23. Harpua

    Harpua Chosen One star 9

    Registered:
    Mar 12, 2005
    I've been single, by choice, for 17 years, for a reason. My son's father traumatized the **** out of me. I had a short-ish relationship after that, but I was a mess, and it didn't work out. I dove into being a single mom to an amazing son, and eventually, in 2011, got into therapy. In 2015, I started the meds. It's been a rollercoaster ride for sure, but Things have been increasingly steady in my head. lol

    Elliot is watching you...

    [​IMG]
     
  24. Harpua

    Harpua Chosen One star 9

    Registered:
    Mar 12, 2005
    Bruh, it's cold af. I was off yesterday, and I'm off today.... I am not doing ****.

    [​IMG]
     
  25. solojones

    solojones Chosen One star 10

    Registered:
    Sep 27, 2000
    Actual temp -20 is the coldest I've ever felt (in Minnesota). My eyes basically froze when I ran to the car.

    Definitely just stay inside and don't do ****!
     
    Lady_Belligerent and Jedi Ben like this.