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  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

[Mod's Time Trial Challenge] What Have I Done (Temiri Blagg, Poe Dameron, Rey) Vignette 8.15.19

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by JediMaster_Jen, Aug 15, 2019.

  1. JediMaster_Jen

    JediMaster_Jen Force Ghost star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 3, 2002
    Title: What Have I Done

    Summary: Temiri Blagg loses something he shouldn’t.

    Disclaimer: George Lucas created Star Wars. Star Wars, LucasFilm Ltd. and all its content are currently owned and operated by the Walt Disney Company.

    ///////////////

    This story was written for the Mod's Time Trial Challenge. I had 24 hours to write a story using three specific prompts.
    1. Your TV trope is: Terrible Pick-up Lines
    2. Your recycled challenge quote is: "Oh, no. What have I done? What am I doing? What will I do?" - the Simpsons Quote Challenge
    3. Your picture prompt is: (Original Link: https://pixabay.com/photos/mountain-valley-water-liquid-sky-2589576/)[​IMG]

    ///////////////

    “Oh, no,” Temiri muttered to himself as he looked around frantically.


    He turned in circles; running his hands through his shaggy black hair as he searched. He looked everywhere; under his bed, atop his shelves, in his desk drawers. It was nowhere.


    “What have I done?” he asked aloud as he continued to spin. “What am I doing? What will I do?”


    “You okay, Kid?” a voice sounded from behind him. “You lose something?”


    Temiri nearly broke his neck he turned around so rapidly. “Um…no I…no…”


    Poe Dameron laughed. “Lost your lightsaber again, huh?”


    Temiri flopped down onto his bed and sighed. “Yes. This morning I spilled my breakfast all over the floor. This afternoon I…that pretty girl, Ishara; I used probably the absolute worst line I…it was awful. She didn’t even say no, she just…laughed and walked away. Then, to top off my day, I have no idea where I left my lightsaber. Rey is gonna kill me.”


    Poe sat down next to the teen and put a comforting hand on his shoulder. “Couldn’t be any worse than the lines I used at your age. What did you say?”


    He heard Temiri say something, but it was so quiet and muffled he had to ask the boy to repeat it.


    He sighed. “I asked her if it…if it hurt when she fell from the moons of Iego because she had to be an angel.”


    Poe chuckled, but patted Temiri’s shoulder. “Well, as lines go, it’s not too bad.”


    Temiri jumped up. “Not too bad?! She laughed at me!”


    Poe stood as well. “Look, Kid, that stuff is gonna happen. You just gotta brush it off, you know? Move on. While you’re doing that, keep looking for your lightsaber.”


    ///////////////


    Hours later, Temiri had found his lightsaber and had climbed up a decent sized hill far from the city where the Resistance was based and was sitting down staring at the stars. It was so dark he felt like he could see forever; to all the planets in all the systems in the galaxy. He could hear the gentle waves on the lake below.


    “Peaceful, isn’t it?” Rey asked as she came to sit next to her student.


    Temiri nodded. “Yes, it is. The city seems so far away and the stars…so close. I feel like I could reach out and touch them. Maybe even walk among them someday.”


    Rey smiled. “Perhaps your name should be Skywalker. You’re a dreamer, Temiri. You, more than anyone I know, belong in the sky, among the stars.”


    Temiri’s shoulders sagged. “Yeah.”


    “It’s okay, really,” she comforted him. “But, one day it will cost you to lose your weapon. Try to be more careful.”


    His eyes still on the starry skies above, he caught sight of a shooting star. He quickly closed his eyes and made a wish.


    “Did you wish to stop losing your lightsaber?” Rey questioned knowingly.


    Temiri laughed. “Yes, Master. We’ll see if it works this time.”
     
    Last edited: Apr 1, 2022
  2. devilinthedetails

    devilinthedetails Fiendish Fanfic & SWTV Manager, Interim Tech Admin star 6 Staff Member Administrator

    Registered:
    Jun 19, 2019
    This story gave me a good chuckle, and I loved how you portrayed Poe's character in particular. Thanks for participating in the challenge and giving us this entry!
     
    JediMaster_Jen likes this.
  3. Findswoman

    Findswoman Fanfic and Pancakes and Waffles Mod (in Pink) star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Feb 27, 2014
    So much fun to get a glimpse of an older Temiri Blagg—not only as a student of Rey's with his own lightsaber, but as a young man worrying about young-man stuff like How to Talk to Girls! :D Wonderful that he has such encouraging voices beside him, from both Poe (as an older, avuncular friend) and Rey (as his teacher). I could totally believe that Poe has perpetrated some perfectly awful pick-up lines in his time, and I love how understanding Rey is about the loss of the lightsaber. May Temiri's wish come true! (And really, it's the simplest ones, like that one, that are most likely to come true, isn't it? @};- ) Great work here, and so wonderful to see you back at it! =D=
     
    JediMaster_Jen likes this.
  4. JediMaster_Jen

    JediMaster_Jen Force Ghost star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 3, 2002
    Glad you enjoyed it. I was worried how Poe would come across. Never written his character before. :)

    It was fun to write. :) Had to give broom boy some love. :p

    Thank you so much. [:D]Glad to be back at it.
     
  5. brodiew

    brodiew Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 11, 2005
    Another excellent story, Jen. I have to say that for an absent minded apprentice he could not have to better mentors on his side. One more thing Poe could have said is that it took a lot of guts to even say that line to Ishara. And about Ishara. is she another Jedi student or a person from the city?

    I also enjoyed re bringing up Temiri's wanderlust. The imagery of him sitting on the Hill reaching for the stars was excellent.

    Lastly it was good of Rey to let him know that there could be more serious consequences for losing his weapon. That was a nice touch.
     
    Findswoman likes this.
  6. Mira_Jade

    Mira_Jade The (FavoriteTM) Fanfic Mod With the Cape star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Jun 29, 2004
    Aw, this was such a sweet slice of life! It was just as fascinating to glimpse Temiri's future - both as a Jedi in training and a youngster trying with a girl he has a crush on - as much as it was to see our heroes at this point in time. [face_love]

    Bwaha!! [face_laugh]

    I love how earnestly Temiri intended the pick-up line, even if it didn't have the results he may have first hoped for. But hey - a similar such line worked for Anakin. So, never say nevet. :p I love how you wove your recycled challenge quote into the prose, as well. That was fun, and so relatable!

    Aw, Poe! Look at him, being a voice of reason. Something tells me the advice he's offering comes from experience, at that. [face_mischief]

    I really adored this look at a confident Rey, who's settled into her powers and has embraced her purpose in life. She's an excellent mentor here, knowing just how to build Temiri up and counsel him at the same time. Their dynamic was fantastic - just what I hope for their future! [face_love]


    This was an excellent response to the challenge! Thanks for sharing. :) =D=
     
    JediMaster_Jen and Findswoman like this.
  7. Briannakin

    Briannakin Former Manager star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Feb 25, 2010
    I haven't read any Temiri Blagg fics yet! Its so nice to see him and a glimpse of the future.

    I relate to Poe so much in this. I have a friend - who I used to live with - WHO SOMEHOW LOST EVERYTHING!! I have witnessed the state Temiri has been in so many times! Again, so relatable!

    But I also relate to Temiri here. Just one of those days where nothing goes right. Poor kid. He has a case of "the teenager".

    Bahahahaha! Oh I feel so bad for laughing so hard.
    I love Rey here. You have made her older, wiser, yet still have that spunk that makes her Rey. Bravo!
     
    Findswoman and JediMaster_Jen like this.
  8. Thumper09

    Thumper09 Force Ghost star 4

    Registered:
    Dec 9, 2001
    This is a very nice story! The characters were really relatable, and it's comforting to see that even Force-sensitive heroes in a galaxy far, far away have Bad Days too. Everyone's human (in this case, at least :p) and have to deal with very human emotions and mistakes. Hopefully Temiri takes the wisdom from both Poe and Rey to heart and can learn from his Bad Day. Glad to see Poe and Rey helping him through it, too.

    Great use of the prompts. And I hope Temiri eventually finds his lightsaber. :)