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Saga - PT New World [MMM Challenge--OC's)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by leiamoody, Apr 7, 2014.

  1. leiamoody

    leiamoody Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Nov 8, 2005
    Title: New World
    Author: leiamoody
    Timeframe: Saga; 17 BBY
    Genre: Slice of Life, Drama, Vignette
    Characters: OC's (Paurilis Fejier, Nalieza Fejier)
    Summary: A father sits in a spaceport and contemplates the changes in his life.
    Notes: This is a poorly executed flimsy response to the Monday Mush Mania Challenge.
    Disclaimer: I don't own anything or anyone in the Star Wars universe. They belong to the House of Mouse (AKA Disney). I do own the OC's.

    It was three in the morning, as Paurilis noted by observing the chronometer which sat above the caf entrance. Outside the expansive viewport was a dark indigo sky occasionally dotted with the red and blue afterburners of departing vessels for destinations unknown. Every minute of the twenty-five hour day, beings entered and departed from the spaceport, moving forward into their destinies.

    He was not immune to the whims of change no more than anyone else breathing the perpetually recycled air of the Krisoti Central Terminals. A job offer brought him and Nalieza away from the temporary sanctuary of his mother's home on Ultraia to the permanent second chance that awaited them on Aeithera. They needed some new place in the galaxy to call home, a world that put him in a sane environment where he could remember who he was supposed to be in this "transitional phase", as the grief counselor recommended. It was good to find a new home that placed him back into the familiar comfort of a university setting.

    Paurilis wrapped his fingers around a long-cold mug of herbal tea. The silver wedding circlet on his right hand was a fresh reminder that three months could pass so quickly from that one night when Maiena died. Mourning customs on their home world dictated the marriage band was supposed to be abandoned on the burial day. Like many other traditions from the Old Ways, Paurilis found the idea of setting aside the symbol of his commitment to Maiena and their promised future impossible to comprehend.

    His gaze moved across the table to the other side of the booth, where his young daughter was curled up asleep on the other padded seat. It had been a tricky seven hours across three systems on the passenger transport to Aeithera. Nalieza had spent the first half-hour challenging her father's limited knowledge of astrophysics while they stood in the gallery of the passenger transport just before entering hyperspace. The inquisitive nature of a two year old gave way to running around the maze of corridors before falling asleep on a lounge chair outside the gift shop. She managed to remain asleep over the next four hours, through disembarkation and his quest to find their luggage at the baggage carousel. The little girl had not managed to get a decent night's rest since the day of her mother's funeral.

    The caf's server droid floated over to the booth. "Can I offer you another tea, sir?"

    Paurilis considered the murky depths of the near-ancient tea still remaining in the cup between his fingers. It was probably a good time to leave the spaceport and head to their new house. Not that it made any sense to unpack in the wee hours of the morning, although he knew sleep would prove elusive once again for him. But maybe he could wait just a while longer; their ancient bungalow set on the cul-de-sac in Aeon Park was still locked tight. The passkey rested in his left jacket pocket, and wasn't likely to sneak off anywhere and get lost. He could remain here in this paused moment just a little while longer...twenty minutes, forty minutes, then it was off to the robo-taxi and their new home and the beginning of a different life.

    He smiled at the server droid. "Yes, absolutely."
    Ewok Poet likes this.
  2. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Kessel Run Champion star 8 VIP - Game Winner

    Aug 31, 2004
    Awww, a definite slice of life there - you can feel the sense of los but the demands of the moment and 'starting fresh' are keeping it at bay, mostly. =D=
  3. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Kessel Run Champion star 6 VIP - Game Winner

    Aug 21, 2006
    a beautiful piece with likable oc's
  4. ardavenport

    ardavenport Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Dec 16, 2004
    A nice contemplative piece; between two worlds and he's trying to make it last.:)
  5. leiamoody

    leiamoody Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Nov 8, 2005
    Thanks for the replies on this little piece of wasted time.
  6. Ewok Poet

    Ewok Poet Force Ghost star 6

    Jul 31, 2014
    This is so NOT a piece of wasted time. While I think that one may need to have a genuine attraction to your universe in order to truly appreciate these vignettes; I am grateful for every single piece of work you decide to share with us. Nalieza's life is interesting in every single moment, every single scene, every single frame and therefore, seeing her as a little one is as valuable as seeing her in, say, Green Silk or The Distance of Homecoming.

    And her father is obviously trying all he can to make up for the mother no longer being there.

    The GFFA needs its own Tom's Dinner and while this may not be the kind of "mush" most people expect to see, I enjoyed it. The whole atmosphere would fit perfectly into a neo-noir film or an early 1990s music video.
    leiamoody likes this.
  7. divapilot

    divapilot Force Ghost star 4

    Nov 30, 2005
    Time spent creating art, especially writing as ethereally lovely as yours, is never wasted. What a wonderful piece to resurface right before Americans observe Father's Day. I love how he still respects the past and has determined optimism for the future (especially in light of his daughter's needs), but there is something sacred here in the present too.

    A wonderful companion piece to "Green Silk." Maiena is so very present in her absence.
  8. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Kessel Run Champion star 8 VIP - Game Winner

    Aug 31, 2004
    Ah, I thought this seemed familiar. I loved getting a second read after reading "Green Silk" =D= Lends a stronger depth of poignancy when you put the two together. @};-
    leiamoody likes this.
  9. leiamoody

    leiamoody Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Nov 8, 2005
    Thank you for all the replies. :D

    Now for responses...

    1. I've got a complex little universe that I've created over the years, that's not hard to admit. Reading everything within in it isn't a requirement to get what is going on (I've got background notes that I really need to post on some of the more weird stuff, although a couple of those already exist in the Fanon thread). I've focused on Nalieza's life to some extent because she's a major OC and I wanted to expand upon her background in order to give myself, and maybe eventually other readers, some context to a story involving her and some Corellian guy and BIG MYSTICAL DREAM STUFF that I keep saying that I'm supposed to rewrite, but which never seems to keep happening...

    Her father, Paurilis, has always felt like he needs to hold everything together, which of course he does because he has this young daughter to take care of after a major tragedy. He holds everything together very well over the years.

    2. Some of my earliest ideas about my GFFA were formed during the late 80's and early 90's. :p So I guess that explains a quasi-eternally classic yet somehow...vintage? feel to it. (Plus I loved "Tom's Diner", great beat :D).

    Her father is having to make everything up as he goes along and follow his heart while also trying to create a new life while still retaining a certain resemblance to normalcy ("semblance" doesn't convey the reality of having to start over after the death of your wife and unborn child, does it?). Paurilis is finding the present in the very moment of staying just a little longer and having another cup of caf, because it's the pause he needs before going forward again into the next chapter of his life. Anyone who has undergone a major transition knows this feeling, but it's a unique level of heady and hell for a parent.

    It does help to put the pieces of Nalieza's life together in story puzzle fashion, if only because it makes sense from a narrative perspective. If I could always write everything in chronological order on a regular schedule, that would help even more. ;)
    Ewok Poet likes this.
  10. Jedi_Tyler

    Jedi_Tyler Jedi Master star 1

    Apr 11, 2005
    Definitely not a wasted piece of time. Not even close!

    Very poignant story, seeing Paurilis caught in that space between the past and the future and wishing for it to continue on one minute longer, then another. Well done. =D=
    Nyota's Heart likes this.
  11. leiamoody

    leiamoody Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Nov 8, 2005
    Thank you. :D