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JCC Pleistocene Park > Jurassic Park

Discussion in 'Community' started by Jabbadabbado, Mar 25, 2015.

  1. Jabbadabbado

    Jabbadabbado Manager Emeritus star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Mar 19, 1999
    So, everyone knows that one of the central problems of "Dino DNA" is that the shelf life of DNA is too short for reconstructing the dinosaur genome, of which nothing remains in fossils or amber, etc.

    However, scientists have successfully reconstructed much of the neanderthal genome, and have spliced recovered mammoth DNA into elephants.

    With a little work, we might be able to breed neanderthals and mammoths, and then drop them into an amusement park where visitors could watch neanderthals hunt mammoths. Obviously we'd have to invent a neanderthal mammoth hunting culture, and then teach our neanderthals to practice it, but on the plus side, we could recreate part of the ancient human diet, which included both mammoth and neanderthals, and serve it at park restaurants.

    Who wouldn't pay top $ to see a mammoth. It's no T Rex. But it's a mammoth! Also neanderthal sliders at the restaurants. Remember that .3% difference in the genome means it's not cannibalism. Just think about it.
     
  2. Darth Guy

    Darth Guy Chosen One star 10

    Registered:
    Aug 16, 2002
    Mammoth captivity: all the abuse and mistreatment fun of elephant captivity, except more exotic. I look forward to mammoths being driven to re-extinction due to demand for ivory from China and the United States.

    Neanderthal captivity: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_zoo
     
    Debo likes this.
  3. Jabbadabbado

    Jabbadabbado Manager Emeritus star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Mar 19, 1999
    If you can cleanse the neanderthal DNA from the cross contamination caused by breeding with the waves of homo sapiens expansion out of Africa, then it really won't be a human zoo. It will be more of a cattle ranch.

    Granted, the neanderthals were likely much more clever than even the fantasy velociraptors of the Jurassic Park series, so we'll have all the problems of a major theme park and a major zoo but in the primate house they'll be throwing spears instead of feces. Or maybe spears and feces.
     
  4. Darth Guy

    Darth Guy Chosen One star 10

    Registered:
    Aug 16, 2002
    Neanderthals could be a subspecies of homo sapiens (and if they can produce viable offspring with us, the classification fits), so they're human in the closest possible sense. Even if they weren't, they'd be by far the second-most-intelligent animal on the planet.
     
  5. Jabbadabbado

    Jabbadabbado Manager Emeritus star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Mar 19, 1999
    the neanderthals like to think of us as more a subspecies of them. That's why we'll need to eat them to show our superiority. It's the ultimate answer to the "are they human" question. "Taste like chicken?" Then it's an animal.
     
  6. ShaneP

    ShaneP Ex-Mod Officio star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Mar 26, 2001
    Welcome…to Pleistocene Park.

    Doesn't have the same ring to it.

    [​IMG]
     
    BigAl6ft6 and Jabbadabbado like this.
  7. Jabbadabbado

    Jabbadabbado Manager Emeritus star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Mar 19, 1999
    Halocene Park just sounded like what we're already doing. Quaternary Park has no ring to it at all. I'm afraid it's Pleistocene Park or nothing.
     
  8. ShaneP

    ShaneP Ex-Mod Officio star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Mar 26, 2001
    That's not bad I guess. It just sounds like a form of plastic.
     
  9. Jabbadabbado

    Jabbadabbado Manager Emeritus star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Mar 19, 1999
    Tarantian Park? I agree with you that branding is critical.
     
    spicer likes this.
  10. ShaneP

    ShaneP Ex-Mod Officio star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Mar 26, 2001
    [​IMG]

    It's funny this stuff exists.
     
    BigAl6ft6 and VadersLaMent like this.
  11. Jabbadabbado

    Jabbadabbado Manager Emeritus star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Mar 19, 1999
    That's priceless. Clearly, the idea is an obvious one. But now the technology is catching up.
     
  12. ShaneP

    ShaneP Ex-Mod Officio star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Mar 26, 2001
    What's your opinion on it? Do you think someone would do it if they could? I don't mean the park but cloning.
     
  13. Jabbadabbado

    Jabbadabbado Manager Emeritus star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Mar 19, 1999
    no question about the mammoth. Tough call about neanderthals. We've already absorbed a lot of their DNA, but we proved, multiple times as a species, that we weren't interested in sharing the planet with other hominids.
     
    ShaneP likes this.
  14. JoinTheSchwarz

    JoinTheSchwarz JC Head Admin & Community Manager star 9 Staff Member Administrator

    Registered:
    Nov 21, 2002
    If we are going to make a park involving cloning, it better be Raëlian Park.
     
  15. ShaneP

    ShaneP Ex-Mod Officio star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Mar 26, 2001

    Preach on!

    [​IMG]
     
  16. Jabbadabbado

    Jabbadabbado Manager Emeritus star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Mar 19, 1999
    It's important to be Raëlistic about our goals.

    Hisham'ru lakhem pen yif'teh l'vav'khem v'sar'tem va'avad'tem Elohim acheirim v'hish'tachavitem lahem

    is a prayer that translates loosely as "Good Lord I'm surprised it took this long for people to start worshipping UFOs."
     
  17. ShaneP

    ShaneP Ex-Mod Officio star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Mar 26, 2001
    Oh Raeli?
     
  18. VadersLaMent

    VadersLaMent Chosen One star 10

    Registered:
    Apr 3, 2002
    Oh no. A larger elephant. Look out. Run.
     
    BigAl6ft6 likes this.
  19. Jabbadabbado

    Jabbadabbado Manager Emeritus star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Mar 19, 1999
    you're not fooling anyone. You'd be awed by the majestic mammoth to the point of pants pissing.

    Mind you, mammoth bites can be pretty nasty. A mammoth once bit my sister.
     
    soitscometothis and VadersLaMent like this.
  20. VadersLaMent

    VadersLaMent Chosen One star 10

    Registered:
    Apr 3, 2002
    Next you'll complain that all Star Wars ships should be rotating cylinders for them to be able to stand on the "floor".
     
  21. Jabbadabbado

    Jabbadabbado Manager Emeritus star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Mar 19, 1999
    It's just a matter of basic pragmatism. If you can't clone the one you love, love the one you've cloned.
     
    VadersLaMent likes this.
  22. VadersLaMent

    VadersLaMent Chosen One star 10

    Registered:
    Apr 3, 2002
    I am intrigued by this view and wish to subscribe to your newsletter.
     
  23. Darth Morella

    Darth Morella Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Apr 5, 2004
    When I got to this part I was like "What? With each other? What kinda park would this be?"

    But then, when I read a little further I was like "No".
     
  24. VadersLaMent

    VadersLaMent Chosen One star 10

    Registered:
    Apr 3, 2002
    Mammothals? Neanderoths?
     
  25. xblackout

    xblackout Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 5, 2008
    I just want to see some giant sloths.
     
    spicer and dp4m like this.