Oh no, I expected wisecracks aplenty. I'm sure Obama, religion and the Star Wars prequels would've been popular answers. (Sorry if I stole anyone's thunder there)
A duck walks into a bar, asks the bartender "Got any bread?" Bartender says "No." The duck walks out. The duck walks back in. "Got any bread?" Bartender says "No." The duck walks out. The duck walks back in. "Got any bread?" Bartender says "If you come in here one more time asking for bread, I'm going to nail your beak to this bartop!" The duck walks out. The duck walks back in. "Got any nails?" "No." "Got any bread?" My 4 year old son is still working out how to tell jokes. Along the way he's mastered absurdist humour: "Daddy, why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to go to the mooo-vies."
Beans, beans, good for the heart The more you eat, the more you fart The more you fart, the better you feel So eat your beans at every meal
The doctor wanted a urine sample, a stool sample, and a semen sample. So I left my underwear and went home.
A man cracked open a frozen over river and was pouring ice cold water over himself. When asked why he was doing this, he replied: I have some leftover penicillin. I don't want it to expire.
So, this pirate was walking down the street and he had a steering wheel on the front of his pants. I asked him whether it bothered him and he said, "Aaarrrrr, it drives me nuts."